Seventeen hours. That was exactly how long Elizabeth Hummel had spent in labor. Seventeen hours of contractions and rhythmic breathing and repeatedly sending Burt to get more ice chips. Seventeen hours of delightful anticipation. The longest seventeen hours of her entire life, to be exact. They were far behind her now, though, and the two angelic bundles she had to show for it were, in her opinion, the most perfect babies anyone had ever laid eyes on. It was true what they said, that the love was instantaneous.

"Hey, little man," she said softly, taking a squirming Carson into her arms and settling back into the wheelchair the hospital insisted she leave in. "Are you and your brother ready to go home?" Carson kept wriggling, scrunching up his face and letting out small, dissatisfied whimpers around the pacifier in his mouth. Elizabeth smiled down at him and then looked up at Burt, who was carrying Carson's identical twin, Kurt. Unlike his brother, Kurt was as calm and serene as a tiny angel. He could have easily been mistaken for being asleep if it weren't for his wide open blue eyes, which stared intently, taking in everything. Carson wriggled and reached out his arm toward his brother.

"I think the poor kiddo isn't used to being separated from his brother," said Burt thoughtfully, leaning down so that Kurt and Carson were face to face. Carson's whimpers lessened and his hand flew out to grab at Kurt's face, landing on his nose. Kurt didn't even react. He was clearly used to this. The Hummels had seen similar actions from Carson on the sonogram screen before the boys were born. 

"Looks like you're right," Elizabeth agreed. "Here, give him to me," she said, maneuvering Carson to make room as Burt carefully lowered Kurt into her arms. Carson's small cries stopped altogether as he just stared at his twin.

"Brotherly love," said Burt with a smile. "Alright, let's get these two mini gentlemen and their beautiful mother home, shall we?"

The twins received quite the homecoming. Everybody who dropped by to see them commented on how adorable they were together and how lucky the Hummels were.

"Like two little peas in a pod," Elizabeth's mother commented as she first set eyes on her new grandchildren. "And so feisty! Especially this one," she said, picking up Carson, who disapproved of being picked up at all and started wailing his displeasure.

"Ok, Ok, I'm putting you down," Grandma soothed, setting him back down.

Carson was a crier in general. For the first several days the twins were home, he cried like clockwork every night, much to Burt and Elizabeth's dismay. They briefly worried that he might have colic, but since he only amped up the crying at bedtime, they doubted that this was the cause. At least his crying didn't seem to disturb Kurt, who slept like...well...like a baby.

"Shhhhh," said Elizabeth quietly on the fourth consecutive night of The Carson Hummel Crying Hour. Burt had been up with him the night before, so now it was her turn. She couldn't figure out what was wrong with him. He wasn't hungry. He wasn't wet. He just cried, and simply refused to stop, no matter how many soothing lullabies she tried singing.

"What's wrong, baby?" she asked softly, running her hand in soothing circles across his back as he continued his incessant crying. "What's got my baby boy so unhappy?" She glanced over at Kurt, who was sleeping peacefully in his own crib, entirely undisturbed by his brother's wails. He's able to sleep through anything, Elizabeth thought. If only his big brother would follow his lead. She glanced down at the miserable heap of Carson in her arms and then back over at Kurt, an idea starting to form as she remembered his reaction in the hospital when Kurt had been placed near him. I wonder...

She wasn't sure that it would work, and she knew that if it didn't she would have to deal with two unhappy babies instead of just one (Kurt, despite being the very definition of an angel while he was awake, certainly could be quite the angry little bear if he was woken up before he was ready). She decided it was worth a shot and that she'd risk it. She carried Carson across the room to Kurt's crib. Maybe it was just her imagination, but his cries seemed to lessen just the tiniest bit the closer she got. She reached the crib and carefully lowered Carson into it, settling him in beside Kurt.

The result was so immediate it was actually quite astonishing. Carson's wails ceased, his face relaxing as he hiccuped and then let out a satisfied gurgle. One small hand shot out, bonking Kurt right in the face, as though he were touching him to make sure he was real. Kurt slept on, unfazed, and Carson's eyes started to close.

Well, what do you know? Elizabeth thought, smiling down at her sons. He just missed his brother. She watched as Carson drifted off to sleep, smiling down at her two beautiful babies as Burt shuffled into the room, rubbing his eyes. 

"Is he finally out?" he asked sleepily, joining his wife beside the crib. 

"Yep," she whispered. "Turns out he just wanted to be close to his brother. Look at them! They're so cute."

They certainly were. Carson let out a contented sigh and turned his head so that he and Kurt were face to face before finally falling completely asleep.

From then on, they learned it was best to just put Carson to bed in the same crib as Kurt every night. He would inevitably cry anyway until he was with Kurt, and this way they saved the hassle of having to get up and put him there.

By the time the twins were over a year old, they were still sleeping together every night. Everybody told the Hummels that this wasn't healthy, and that the boys needed to learn to sleep in their own beds, but truthfully, they were so adorable when they slept all curled up next to each other that their parents didn't have the heart to separate them. It seemed almost cruel to do so, since they were so incredibly close. It was fascinating to see the ways in which they were so in tune with one another. If Carson fell and skinned his knee, Kurt was the one who cried. If Kurt was unhappy, Carson would crawl over and coo at him until he smiled. They even had their own little language only they seemed to be able to understand. Burt and Elizabeth had spent many an hour engrossed in watching their boys talk to one in another in what sounded like gibberish to their adult ears, but which seemed to make perfect sense to Kurt and Carson, who carried on as though they were having a real conversation. 

In fact, they didn't say actual words at all until they were almost two years old. Elizabeth had taken Kurt to the doctor's office for a checkup, leaving Burt at home with Carson, who wasn't happy at all with this turn of events. He didn't enjoy being separated from Kurt for any length of time, and he was incredibly cranky about it. He cried and whimpered in his playpen until Burt picked him up and bounced him gently, kissing his forehead.

"I know, buddy. He'll be back soon," he said soothingly as the phone rang. He carried Carson into the kitchen and balanced him on his hip with one hand while picking up the cordless phone with the other. As he spoke with one of his long-time customers about a tire order, he absentmindedly carried Carson around the house, pausing in front of the mantle in the living room as he tried to recall the answer to a question his customer had asked. Carson, thankfully, had pretty much stopped his whimpering, so focused was he on the mantle behind Burt. He squirmed and reached out his small hands over Burt's shoulder.

"Kurt."

Burt froze, his conversation forgotten as he looked at his son, who was still staring intently at something on the mantle. Had he just said...?

"I'm sorry, can I call you back?" he said into the phone, not waiting for an answer before setting it down and focusing his attention on Carson. "What did you say, buddy?"

"Kurt," repeated Carson, making grabby hands and trying to wiggle his way out of his father's grasp. Burt turned around to see what had Carson so mesmerized. It turned out to be a small, framed photograph of Kurt, taken shortly after the twins had come home from the hospital. Carson was reaching desperately for it, practically throwing himself at the mantle. "Kurt! KURT!"

How the heck did he know that was a picture of Kurt? thought Burt as he took the picture off the mantle and cautiously handed it to Carson, who eagerly grabbed it and broke into a huge smile.

"Kurt," he said again, staring down at the photo. "Kurt Kurt Kurt."

"Yes," agreed Burt, grinning at his son. "That's Kurt!" He couldn't wait until Elizabeth got home so he could tell her about this. 

As if on cue, Elizabeth burst through the door at that very second, a glowing smile on her face and her hair flying as she hugged Kurt to her chest.

"You will NEVER guess what Kurtsie just did in the car," she said excitedly, "He said his first word, didn't you baby," she continued before Burt could answer, looking to Kurt and rubbing her nose to his. "Go on, sweetie, say it. Say it again for Daddy."  She pointed to Carson and looked at Kurt. "Who's that, Kurtsie?"

Kurt's small face erupted into the brightest smile. "ARSON!" he screeched gleefully, reaching out one arm to touch his brother. Carson grinned back at him, the photo forgotten. "Kurt!"

Burt choked back tears as he informed his shocked wife that their sons' first words happened on the same day, and that they were each other's names.

***********************************

Carson couldn't remember a time in which he hadn't been there for Kurt, designating himself as his brother's best friend and protector. Nobody messed with Kurt unless they wanted a very angry Carson on their hands. The twins' grandmother delighted in telling strangers about the time when they were four years old and she had taken them to the park and given each boy an ice cream cone. As she sat on a nearby bench and watched them, a slightly older boy had come up to them. He considered them thoughtfully for a minute before grabbing Kurt's ice cream with one hand and pushing him down onto the ground with the other.

Kurt landed on his back and burst into tears. Before anyone had any time to react to the situation, Carson was on the move, walking right up to the bully who had hurt his brother. Without letting go of his own ice cream, he brought one small foot up and fearlessly kicked the other boy hard in the knee, causing him to scream and fall over. His work finished, he had calmly walked back over to Kurt, who was being comforted by Grandma. Carson gave him a tight hug and then handed him his own ice cream. Kurt's tears had stopped immediately.

"You should have been there! It was just the cutest thing I had ever seen in my life," Grandma loved to say. "I was so proud of that boy, standing up for his brother like that."

Basically, if you messed with Kurt, you messed with Carson. Kurt was the only person he ever seemed to show any affection for. To most people, he was aloof and disinterested, interacting with them only on an as-needed basis. It wasn't like that with Kurt at all. He was always bright and animated around his brother, gladly doing whatever it took to keep him happy. If that meant he had to sit through the occasional tea party with Kurt and Kurt's stuffed animals, or help Kurt make pretend cakes in his toy kitchen, then he was happy to do it, just so long as it was putting a smile on his brother's face.

"You are SO lucky I love you, Kurtsie," he often said. "There's no way I'd ever play tea party with anyone else. Only you."

Basically, he would happily move heaven and earth, if possible, to protect Kurt and keep him happy. He was like Kurt's own personal bodyguard, a role that only grew stronger as they got older. He did everything in his power to make sure that Kurt was always spared any kind of pain. He liked to think he did a pretty good job.

Unfortunately, there are some things you can't shield people from, no matter how much you'd like to.

The first time their mother had landed in the hospital wasn't entirely unexpected. She'd been tired and short of breath for months, unable to do nearly as much as she used to without having to stop and rest frequently. She had brushed off everyone's pleas that she get checked out by a doctor, insisting she was fine and that it was just a really bad flu or something. She couldn't deny it anymore when she had fainted at the party for the twins' seventh birthday, sending Kurt into hysterical tears as he threw himself into Carson's arms, burying his face in his brother's neck as their mother was loaded into an ambulance. Grandma had stayed with the boys at the house while Burt had stayed with Elizabeth at the hospital, and from eavesdropping out in the hallway when his father called, Carson managed to gather that there was something very wrong with his mother's heart. He didn't tell Kurt when he asked if he knew what was wrong. He didn't know how to.

"I don't know, Kurt. I guess maybe she's just really tired, that's all."

"Oh," said Kurt. "But...the doctors will make her better, right?"

"......right," said Carson, hoping this was true.

That was the first time.

Elizabeth's second hospital stay happened several months later, after the medication she had been taking for her heart had seemed to stop working at all. She stayed much longer this time, almost a month, and the boys visited her almost every day, whether with Grandma or with Burt. It was weird, Carson thought, seeing their once vital, healthy mother hooked up to so many monitors, looking so pale and listless. He knew it scared Kurt, and he did his best to lighten the mood however he could, mostly by cracking jokes and making both Kurt and Elizabeth laugh.

"I want you boys to promise me something," Elizabeth said one day, gesturing for them to stand next to her hospital bed. 

"What is it, Mom?" Kurt asked curiously.

"I want you to promise me that you'll both always take care of one another," she replied softly, taking one  of each of their hands and squeezing. "That no matter what, you'll always be there for each other. Please? Promise?"

Carson felt a sense of dread in the way she said that, but tried to ignore it. "Of course, Mom! I promise to always take care of Kurt. I have to, he's my brother!"

Kurt smiled. "Me, too."

"Good boys," their mother had replied. "My perfect babies." She wrapped them in a hug and kissed both of their foreheads before drifting off to sleep.

That was the second time.

The third time was different, and everyone knew it, whether they admitted it or not. Elizabeth had only been getting worse, not better, and Burt hardly ever smiled anymore. Grandma had moved in permanently to help care for the twins, and the moments in which Elizabeth was conscious enough to carry on brief conversations with her family were few and far between. So, Carson wasn't too surprised when Burt sat him and Kurt down one evening and said that he had something very important to talk to them about.

"Is this about Mom?" Carson asked, as Kurt plopped down next to him on the couch.

"Well....yes. Yes, it...it is," Burt said tiredly, removing his hat and pinching the bridge of his nose. "This isn't going to be easy to tell you kids, so I want you to pay close attention, OK?"

The boys nodded in unison.

"Ok, well, you know how Mom has been...how she hasn't been well for a long time."

Carson nodded. Kurt looked down at his hands.

"Well, the thing is, boys, that in order for her to...to get better, she would need a new heart. Hers is just too tired to keep up with her anymore."

"Why can't the hospital just give her a new heart then?" Kurt asked in a small, sad voice that twisted Carson's stomach.

Burt looked at him sympathetically. "They'd like to, kiddo, but unfortunately they can't just give her any old heart. It has to be a good match for her, and they're just...they're just not able to...to find one for her." His voice shook with restrained tears as he looked at his sons.

"Is she going to be OK?" Carson asked, even though he knew the answer. He felt Kurt inch closer to him until their bodies were touching, the two of them sharing the same seat on the sofa.

Burt closed his eyes for a long moment before he spoke. "No, buddy. She's not. As difficult as this is for me to say....I'm afraid we don't have much more time with your mother."

"No!" Kurt whined, bursting into tears and burying his face into Carson's shoulder. Carson, who prided himself on never crying, ever, felt tears start to slip down his own face as he wrapped his arms around Kurt and held him close.

The day Elizabeth Hummel was buried was sunny yet freezing. The minister presiding over the burial was saying a lot of things about how she was "In a better place" now, but neither boy was paying much attention. Kurt's hand never left Carson's during the entire funeral service, which Carson found oddly comforting. Maybe because it gave him something solid and real to hold onto. Kurt was his rock, and he was Kurt's. It had always been that way, but now it felt even more true than ever before. He glanced over at his father, who was holding on to Kurt's other hand, his eyes glistening with tears. It was weird, seeing him cry. Out of place. Like seeing Halloween decorations in the middle of December. Fathers weren't supposed to cry, especially not theirs. Their father had always been too strong for that.

Kurt stayed glued to Carson's side all day long, like his identical shadow. He said nothing. He didn't even cry anymore after awhile. He just clung to his twin as if he were a life preserver in the middle of the ocean. Carson didn't mind at all. Kurt was a welcome distraction from his own wrecked feelings, and focusing on comforting him took Carson's mind off of things. 

"Carson?" Kurt asked that night, as he slipped into bed beside his twin. They still shared a bed, even at eight years old. They had tried separate beds for about three days once, when they were five. It hadn't worked out. Neither boy had been able to sleep without the other beside him.

"Yeah, Kurt?"

"Do you believe in heaven?"

Carson thought about it a minute. "No."

Kurt nodded. "Me, either. I think it's all made up. Like fairy tales." He sighed, yawned, and flopped back against his pillows. He was asleep within seconds, obviously exhausted from the events of the day. Carson couldn't blame him. He was as emotionally drained as it was possible to be. He snuggled up beside Kurt and heaved a shuddery breath, allowing himself to cry a little now that Kurt couldn't see.

He awoke several hours later to find the spot beside him empty. Kurt was gone. Carson sat up and rubbed his eyes, looking around the dark basement bedroom. Where was he?

"Mom?" he heard a small voice call out from the corner. Kurt. Carson squinted, allowing his eyes to adjust to the dark. 

"MOM?"

Kurt was across the room, standing in the corner facing the wall breathing heavily. Carson flew out of bed and bounded over to him.

"MOOOOOM!" Kurt sobbed, his voice high and fearful. Carson reached him and tentatively reached out a hand to touch his brother's shoulder. Kurt was shaking like a leaf, his whole body vibrating with panic, but he didn't otherwise react to Carson's touch. Looking closer, Carson could see that Kurt's eyes were open, but were unfocused. Carson gingerly tapped him on the arm. No reaction. He was asleep.

"Shhh," he said softly, gingerly placing both hands on either of Kurt's shoulders and leading him gently back toward the bed. "It's ok," he whspered. "You're ok." Kurt's eyes fluttered open and looked around.

"C-carson?" he asked, his voice shaky and scared.

"Yeah," Carson said quietly. "You were having a nightmare, Kurtsie. Come on, let's get back into bed." He guided Kurt under the covers and slipped in beside him, wrapping his arms around him in a comforting embrace.

"It was awful, Carson," Kurt sniffed, his breath coming out in shaky gasps. "I could see Mom, and there was something coming to get us, something big and shadowy, and...and...I..."

"Shhhh," Carson soothed, holding him tighter. "It's OK. You're safe now. I've got you."

Kurt let out a shuddery sigh and seemed to relax a bit, settling into his twin's arms. "Don't leave me."

"I won't," Carson agreed. Of course he wouldn't. He would be strong for Kurt, no matter what. He had promised. And Carson Phillip Hummel never went back on his promises.