On Tuesday morning Kurt met up with Karofsky at their usual meeting place: Kurt's locker. He saw Dave leaning on the red metal and thumbing through something on his Blackberry like any other day, but Kurt was focused and still in shock from the news he heard yesterday about Zach and Dave. He marched right up to Dave and stated, "We need to talk," in a friendly, yet confrontational way.

Dave seemed to know immediately what Kurt was talking about and started heading for their usual rendezvous point in the bathroom. When the door closed behind them, Kurt started laying into Dave before checking to see if they were even alone. "In the locker room? You told me that you didn't-" They heard a flush sound from one of the stalls and Dave's eyes went wide. Kurt jolted in surprise from the noise and he quickly changed his tone to accusatory, rather than playful because it seemed plausible that the two boys would be arguing instead of Kurt teasing Karofsky, of all people. "-like… her," was the first thing he thought of to finish the sentence.

A boy walked out from the stall and crossed past the two boys saying "hey" to Dave and ignoring Kurt completely. Dave said "hey" back and Kurt made a face, noticing that the boy wasn't going to wash his hands before leaving.

The door closed behind the boy and Kurt immediately started checking the other stalls. No one was in there now. "You had sex with Zach?" he exclaimed with bright eyes and hint of a smile.

"Shh! Calm down. People might hear you outside."

"Yeah, but you had SEX… with ZACH!"

"Of course he went ahead and told you. I knew he'd go running to you after. You're not going to tell anyone, right?"

"Who the hell would I tell?" Kurt said with a smile. "I've kept your homo-secret."

"Yeah. Yeah."

"So?" Kurt asked with a smile, insinuating he was expecting Dave to continue talking.

"So what?"

"So, what happened? I thought you didn't like Zach? He tells you he knows you're gay so you drop your trousers like it an initiation and assume the position?"

Dave kind of smiled. Kurt could tell he was holding it back and wanted to flail like a teenage fangirl, but he kept himself composed. "Did he say anything? About me?"

"What? Seriously? You said, less than a month ago, that you didn't like him because he smiles too much."

Dave made a face like he was weighing options. "He grew on me…"

"Eww," Kurt said, knowing Karofsky's mind was in the gutter and he got the impression Dave was speaking literally and figuratively.

"What do you mean, 'eww?' You made out with him too."

"I didn't shove my dick in his mouth… and other places."

Dave's composure faltered and he started to chuckle. "That's besides the point. Did he say anything about me?"

Kurt thought back to the conversation with Zach. Zach hadn't really given Dave a whole lot of praise, but didn't really give him a negative either, other than saying that it was normal because he was a virgin. "He kept saying that you were so strong."

Dave blushed. Obviously it was something that Kurt wasn't privy too and honestly, he didn't want to know. "Uh," he began, trying not to laugh nervously, "yeah. You're friend Zach is a bit of a freak. In a good way, but…"

"I don't really want to know."

"Did he say anything else?"

"Not really. He didn't go into detail." Kurt was trying to gloss over the fact that it was obvious to Zach that Dave was a virgin.

"Nothing? Not even 'I'd do him again?'"

"Dave!" Kurt laughed and playfully hit the bigger boy the same way he hit Zach yesterday. Karofsky laughed along with him. "Are you two together now, or?"

"Fuck no. You know me. Do I look like I'm about to start dating a guy who's out in this school?"

"Guess not."

"Right. It was fun and I'd do it again, but I'm not looking for commitment right now. Why is he?"

Kurt laughed again. "He had sex with someone he barely spoke to before… I think you're all set on the tall blonde pining for the muscular left tackle."

"Good."

The bell rang for first class and the two boys knew their conversation had to be over. They exited the bathroom without saying another word and Dave walked Kurt to class. Neither boy brought up the topic again for the rest of the day. Not even when Zach winked at Dave in the lunch room when he dropped Kurt off at his table. To Dave's thankfulness, no one saw it, but Kurt, who chesired and sat down without a word.

Later that night, after glee practice and dinner, Zach showed up, as promised from the night before, at the Hummel residence. He had his back pack with him and said something to Burt about studying with Kurt and Burt instructed him to go upstairs.

Zach shut Kurt's bedroom door and quickly opened up his Luis Viton backpack and extracted a brown paper bag from it. Kurt was looking on nervously, but was curious what was in it.

Zach was there to help Kurt out with his intimacy issue. Well, it wasn't so much of an issue as it was practically non-existent to speak of. Zach walked over to Kurt with the paper bag in hand and held it in two hands carefully like it was something of importance. When he got to Kurt he grabbed one of Kurt's throw pillows and put the bag on top of it like he was presenting it to Kurt. "Kurt," Zach started. "This is a very important day. I am honored bestow upon you, hopefully, your first of many. May you use it to your heart's content to squash your nerves and stress and may it bring you and hopefully someone else much joy." He smiled and brought the pillow closer to Kurt, who looked positively confused and weirded out because he had no clue what was in the bag. Zach bowed his head, pretending he was presenting something to a royal figure.

"O-kay," Kurt said slowly then delicately plucked the bag off the pillow and opened it up. He reached in the bag and the second he started to take it out, he saw what it was and shoved it back in the bag and pushed it back at Zach. "No! I can't. Really. I'm all set." His face flushed a deep, dark crimson.

Zach started laughing. "Kurt, come on. You asked for my help and I'm going to help you." He took the bag and opened it, taking out the gift, encased in a hard plastic. He tried to hand it back to Kurt, but Kurt was clasping his hands behind his back and shaking his head. "No. Thank you. I appreciate the sentiment, but no thank you."

"Kurt, everyone has one." Zach was still smiling, very proud of himself for giving Kurt his gift. "Hell, most girls have one and every gay I know definitely has one. Just hold it. It will make it easier." He thrust the hard plastic into Kurt's lap and let Kurt sit with it for a few minutes in silence. "Kurt how did you think you were going to learn? What was I supposed to do to help you?"

"I thought you might give me, like, I don't know, written tips, or a book or something."

Zach rolled his eyes. "Please. Do I look like someone who isn't hands on?"

Kurt's face was still a shade of pink. He stared down at the plastic in his lap and brought his hands around to touch the case. He lifted it up and studied the item inside the clear casing. Zach gave him a Dildo, a purple one at that. "Did it have to be purple?" Kurt asked.

"I thought you'd appreciate the sentiment. Purple is anti-bullying."

"Yeah, but it's purple."

Zach took a slightly more defensive tone and raised his eyebrows, trying not to laugh. "It's going up your ass and you're worried what color it is?" Zach couldn't hold it in and giggled. "Here," Zach took the case back and popped the plastic open. "Look, I got you a good one. It vibrates at different speeds, has a suction cup attachment, and has balls too. Plus it feels kind of realistic." He put the opened case back in Kurt's lap. "I was going to get you one that has fake come, but I thought that might be over the top for your first one." He turned to his backpack and took out a set of batteries. He brought them back over to Kurt. "Do you want to be alone with it for a few minutes?" he asked.

"What? No!" Kurt almost yelled.

Zach laughed harder. "Chill. I didn't mean it like that." He brought his laughter down to a chuckle. "I meant so you can feel less awkward about touching it. I know you've never seen one up close, never mind touched one."

"Oh… I don't think I could feel less awkward."

"All the same, I'm going to go to the bathroom. When I come back, that thing better be out of it's package." Zach turned and left the room.

Kurt stared at the purple piece in it's plastic cradle. He sighed. "Just do it. Get it over with." He lifted his hand off his lap and put one finger on the head. To his surprise it felt lifelike. Not that he had touched anyone else's cock besides his own. Now he was intrigued. Kurt took the dildo out of the case and examined it different ways: up close, with his eyes closed, and at different angles. He could feel places that had subtle veins, places that were harder, places that were softer. It was perfectly shaped. Kurt doubted there were many men with a dick as perfect as this one. Even his own had the slightest of a curve. But he knew that all sex toys were meant to be the object of perfection, a fantasy of the real thing.

"That's a good boy," Zach said when he returned.

Kurt hadn't heard him come back in the room. "It's surprisingly life like," he said turning it over once more. "In a too perfect to be real, kind of way."

"I know. I have one just like it." He said plopping down on the bed. And fishing through his bag. "Did you put the batteries in?"

Kurt took that as an order and he began fumbling with silicone and Duracell batteries. Zach took a black, velvet bag with a gold rope around the top, out of his bag. It sort of looked like a tube sock to Kurt. "Holly hell. Tell me that isn't yours."

Zach gave him a "Bitch, please" look and then chuckled. "Of course it is. Don't go all 'get thee to a nunnery' on me now." Zach opened the bag and extricated a dildo that looked just like Kurt's, only pink flesh colored. Kurt stared at how Zach handled it with ease and complete comfort ability. "Okay, here's what I want you to do."

"Wait, we're doing this?" Kurt looked panicked.

"Try to calm down and relax. I'm teaching you how to do give a blowjob. It's better to have you do it, than to give you step by step procedures. Hence the boy-toy."

Kurt wanted to laugh at the flippant nickname, but was still too embarrassed that this was actually happening. "I-I don't know. Can't you just give me some pointers?"

"No. You'll forget all about them by the time you get to it, but actually doing it, you'll remember that. I'd have you practice on me, but I don't think Blaine is up for sharing." Zach winked. "Unless you think he wouldn't mind?" He grinned devilishly.

"Um. No. He'd mind, and I would too." Kurt blushed at the offer. He'd probably have felt flattered if he wasn't so nervous.

"Damn." Zach snapped his fingers. "Guess the Battery Operated Boy will have to do." He repositioned the dildo in his hand. "Okay, first things first- And don't object to anything, just do it. Got it?" Kurt finally nodded his head and agreed. He held his purple dildo the same way Zach did, in his left hand, cupping the balls. "Right, when you're giving someone a hand job, just do things that you would do to yourself. You know, stroking and adding pressure to the head every now and then." Kurt looked on as he watched Zach perform the exact action he was talking about. "Go on, give it a try."

Kurt felt incredibly awkward doing this, but he took a deep breath and tried to relax. He clutched the silicone cock in his right hand and started pumping it.

"Close your eyes," Zach instructed.

Kurt stopped what he was doing and looked back at Zach. "Why?"

"Because when you're doing it for real, you'll probably be kissing and who the hell kisses with their eyes open?" Zach had a point. So, Kurt closed his eyes and went back to his ministrations. "Here, try it a little like this." Zach repositioned Kurt's hand a little, which made Kurt feel entirely uncomfortable, but he knew Zach was only trying to help. "There. That's much better. You know what? Stop for a second."

Kurt opened his eyes and saw Zach reaching into his velvet bag again. He had the same suction cup attachment that Kurt had. He attached it to his own and stuck the whole thing to Kurt's head board. "That'll work. Put the suction cup on and stick it to your headboard." Kurt did as he was asked. "Now I want you to do the same thing you were doing before, but I want you to, um," Zach was thinking of the right words, "palm and roll the balls in your other hand at the same time as the one that's pumping."

Kurt closed his eyes again. He knelt in front of the head board and started tugging, pulling, and pushing back the skin-like dildo and gently palming the balls. The longer he did it, the more he kept imagining Blaine was in front of him, kissing his neck, while he jerked him off. It was an arousing image. Then he was brought back down to reality when Zach started talking again.

"Good. Okay, easy part done. Um-" Zach started looking around again. "Your headboard isn't tall enough. Oh well, the wall will work I guess. He moved his dildo off the headboard, higher up and onto the wall right at his face level. Kurt wanted to laugh because Zach was talking and it looked like a dick was about to slap him in the face. Kurt was instructed to reposition his the same way. "Alright. Do you want see me so it first or do you want me to just watch you and adjust things?"

"Um…" Kurt bit his lip and got nervous again. "I'll watch you first, I guess. If that's okay?"

"Yeah. That's fine. Wouldn't be the first time someone watched, if you know what I mean." Kurt's eyes went wide and Zach laughed. "You really need to chill out. People are going to think you're a prude if you keep freaking out over jokes like that."

"So you were kidding?"

"It was meant to be a joke, but I have had someone watch before."

"Really?"

"Yeah. I had a straight friend that was really drunk and wanted to watch me and my flavor of the week blow each other. He ended up jerking off to it. It was fun."

Kurt took a deep breath. There was a lot to Zach that he didn't know. There was a lot to sex that Kurt didn't know. Voyeurism was not something Kurt was well acquainted with. "Okay…" He licked his lips. "What's the most important thing I need to know about this?"

"Probably that there is no real right or wrong way to do it, just good, bad, and amazing. Also, everyone is different and there are a lot of techniques, but just as a forewarning, never bite down unless he asks you too, it usually doesn't end well. Got that? You can suck as hard as you want to, but don't use your teeth unless your told."

"Can I ask a question?"

"Sure."

"Why is it called a blow-job if you're sucking?"

Zach got a sly grin on his face again. "My guess is it's because a blowjob is describing what they're doing and not what you're doing."

Kurt thought for a moment and then his eyes went wide when we finally got the joke. Zach started laughing. "Come on. It's funny. Get it? Because the person you're sucking off blows his load?" He slowed his laughter. "Will you lighten up, please? I'm trying to make this less uncomfortable for you."

"You're right. I'm sorry. I'm trying, really I am, but I've never really talked about any of this with anyone and I got really uncomfortable that one time I tried watching those movies. Maybe I'm just a private person."

"Nonsense. You don't need to be uncomfortable about this with me. Especially me."

Kurt sighed. "I'll get used to it. How about we just get back to the lesson?"

"Sure thing. Um- okay. When you first, like, put it in your mouth, don't try to fit the whole thing in at once, because you don't want to gag yourself and throw up. Chances are you've never tried to see how far you could stick something down your throat before, so just ease into it to get a feel for things. Plus, starting out slow is usually a good thing because you'd be teasing him in a sense. No one likes to admit it, but everyone loves a tease."

"Okay. Don't bite down; don't choke. Got it. What else?"

"You're going to want to tighten your lips around it a little. It adds pressure, or friction, or whatever, but it feels great. Anyway, let's try that first and we'll go from there."

"I thought you were going to show me first."

"Oh yeah. Okay. Watch and learn."

Kurt watched carefully, trying to push back the feeling that he was watching something that was meant to be private. Zach grabbed the dildo by the base, seemingly holding onto the balls at the same time and brought the head into his mouth like he was sucking a lollypop. Then he brought his lips down and twisted his head slightly. He tightened his lips like he told Kurt to and when he pulled his head back, he pushed down on the base. He did this a few times, holding tighter at the base when he sunk his head down and pushing down, stretching out the silicone skin, on his way back up. "Okay, now you try," Zach said when he was finished.

Kurt took a deep breath and faced the purple dildo in front of him. He'd imagined this several times in his head. Always Blaine. He closed his eyes and pictured a common dream where Blaine was standing against the door to his dorm room because Kurt had shoved him against it and ripped his pants down to his ankles. He'd taken Blaine into his mouth and as he performed he would look up through his eyelashes and see Blaine breathing hard, hear him moaning and swearing; dream Blaine had a naughty habit of swearing during sexual intimacies. He kept that thought in his head as he put his lips over the head like Zach did. Except he licked the head first, still pretending that Blaine was in front of him and not a fake dick. He sucked on the tip and bobbed his head off and back on, going a little lower each time. He held on to the base of cock, like Zach showed him and did the same holding then pushing movement while he twisted slightly. In his mind, Blaine's knees were shaking.

Kurt took his head off of the dildo and wiped his mouth instinctually when Zach started talking again. "See, you're a natural. Okay, now we'll talk technique. Can you roll your tongue, like, make a wave with it? Like this?" Zach opened his mouth and showed Kurt.

Kurt repeated the motion. "Like that?"

"Yes. Good. Now, at some point, not the whole time, but here and there, try doing that motion on the underside of the cock. On the thick vein underneath. It won't make him come undone, but it feels really good and it kind of gives a break from the pressure part of it."

"Okay. Anything else?"

"Not really. There are lots of things you could do, but it's more of an instinctual thing and I don't want to give away all my secrets because I'm sure Blaine would rather get a blowjob from you and not my clone."

"I see. Good call. You're right."

"Again?"

"Um… No. I think I'm good for now. I'll let you know if I need anymore tips."

"You sure?"

"Yeah. I'm sure." Kurt detached the dildo from the wall and as he held it, he started looking around his room for a place to hide it.

"Sock drawer is always a popular place," Zach said, knowing what Kurt was doing. He detached his from the wall and put it back in the velvet bag.

"Yeah, but Finn sometimes borrows my socks when he runs out."

"Then in a shoe box under your bed?"

"That's not a bad idea." Kurt went into his closet and grabbed an empty shoe box off of his upper shelf. There were several there. The paper wrapping that the shoes were swaddled in were still in it, so Kurt thought it fit nicely. He closed the box and slid it under his bed on the opposite side that faced away from his bedroom door.

They chatted some more about this and that and Zach offered more information about his sexual conquests, which made Kurt even less attracted to him because of the sheer number of people he hooked up with, but was glad that he mentioned the importance of condoms because he knows where he's been, but doesn't always know where his partners have been. The information made Kurt less concerned about Zach.

Zach left and Blaine called around 9:00 to say goodnight and they chatted about their day. Kurt wanted to tell him about his lesson with Zach, but it occurred to him on the spot that maybe Blaine wouldn't be so comfortable with the idea even thought Kurt didn't do anything wrong. But Blaine was dead set on taking thing slow and Kurt had the thought that Blaine maybe might have wanted to have this conversation with Kurt when they were ready. Suddenly Kurt felt a little guilty, but not much because it would all have been worth it when he finally gets to make his reoccurring dream a reality.