Chapter 18:  Perfect Imperfection

Friday November 16, 2012

“Don’t lie to me,” Kurt said, staring at the doorknob to the master suite he shared with Blaine in their apartment. “How bad is it?”

Blaine sighed, tearing his own eyes away from the locked door that stood between them and their home. “It’s bad, Kurt, really bad. . . . We don’t have to do this. We can stay in the guest room until I get everything replaced. Cooper won’t mind staying in a hotel.”

“No, I won’t get anywhere by avoiding this. Besides, Cooper is staying for Thanksgiving and I won’t have him staying in a hotel when we have a perfectly good guest room which he has already made use of for over a week,” Kurt shook his head resolutely. “Open the door.”

Blaine drew in a deep breath, produced the key to the master suite and opened the door. Kurt stepped in first, steeling himself for the horrific sight that was surely awaiting him. Instead, there was nothing. Where there should have been evidence of the trauma that had taken place there was pristine white carpet. Shocked, Kurt turned to Blaine.

“Is this a joke?”

"If it is I’m not in on it,” Blaine replied. He cautiously made his way to the bedroom, but the bloodstained carpet had also been replaced here and the duvet was now light blue with brown accents.

“I thought you said everything was still covered in . . . blood,” Kurt said, walking around the bed in wonder.

"It was,” Rachel’s voice said from behind Kurt.

He spun around to see her step onto the landing from the staircase that led to the lower level of the penthouse.

“You did this?” Kurt asked, touched by the girl’s foresight. He had been dreading the sight of his blood in the master suite ever since the subject of his discharge from the hospital had come up.

“Finn, Burt, and Cooper replaced the carpet while Carole and I picked out new linens for the bed,” Rachel supplied nervously. She didn’t know how Kurt would take to his “perfect” bedroom being intruded on by another person’s purchase but Rachel and Carole had done their best to make selections in Kurt’s style. She was shocked when Kurt pulled her into a tight embrace.

“Ouch,” he said when his left arm became trapped between their bodies. Rachel sprang away from him instantly but Kurt pulled her into his side, hugging her as best he could.

“Are you okay?” Blaine asked in concern. “You need to be careful or the tendons and nerves won’t heal.”

“I’m fine; stop being a worrywart,” Kurt said. “Rachel, this is perfect. Thank you so much.”

“Don’t thank us, bud,” Burt said as he entered the room, flanked by Cooper, Carole, and Finn.

“We didn’t want you to have to worry about anything besides your recovery,” Finn said as Cooper picked his way through the Hudmel-Andersons to the bed where he stretched out.

“I can see you and Blaine have properly broken in this mattress,” Cooper said as he bounced slightly in place.

Kurt flushed a dark pink and suddenly the floor was the most interesting thing in the room. Blaine, however, was all too used to his elder brother’s antics and shoved him off the bed. Cooper sprang to his feet and had Blaine in a headlock before the younger brother could react.

“All right, boys, that’s enough,” Carole said in her strict motherly tone. “Kurt needs his rest.”

“I’m fine, Mom, really. I rested enough in the hospital,” Kurt protested.

“You have three full months of recovery ahead of yourself, young man, and you need plenty of rest. Now, everyone who is not Kurt’s fiancé get out!” Carole said, turning Finn and Rachel out of the room.

“Really, Mom, this isn’t necessary.” Kurt started forward to stop her but Blaine’s hand on his shoulder stopped him.

“She’s right, love. Dr. Cartwright said for you to get plenty of rest.”

Knowing that the likelihood of swaying Blaine was even less than Carole, Kurt gave in. Carole left the room, closing the door behind her.

“Let’s get a bath and go to bed,” Blaine said, taking Kurt’s hand and leading him into the bathroom.

“I’m not an invalid,” Kurt said as Blaine started the water for their bath. “I’m perfectly capable of filling a bathtub with water, you know.”

“I don’t want you to worry about a thing,” Blaine said as he turned to face him. He gently removed the sling and brace from Kurt’s left arm before undressing him.

Once the tub was filled sufficiently, Blaine turned off the tap. He stepped into the tub first, keeping his hands on Kurt’s hips so he could catch him if he fell as he climbed into the tub. They both sank into the water with Kurt leaning against Blaine.

“Are you sure you can handle Thanksgiving here?” Blaine asked as he washed the day’s stress from his fiancé.

“I don’t see why not,” Kurt replied lightly. “After all, everyone’s already here. What about you? Don’t pretend you’re not upset that your parents aren’t coming.”

“I’m just disappointed,” Blaine said. “I thought they would come what with both their sons being in the same city for once. But it’s fine. They can go to Italy if they want to.”

Kurt didn’t answer. He could tell Blaine was hiding the extent to which his parent’s absence was bothering him. He allowed Blaine to help him from the bathtub. Blaine helped Kurt fit his wrist into its brace before they disappeared into their respectful closets. Once they had both slipped into a clean pair of boxer briefs, they climbed into bed.

“You know what I’m thankful for?” Kurt asked after lying in silence in Blaine’s arms for a while.

“What?” Blaine asked, expecting the answer to be life after recent events.

“You,” Kurt said, looking at Blaine with a smile. “You still haven’t given up on me, after everything that I’ve put you through.”

“I promised you I never would,” Blaine said.

“I think I’m finally starting to believe you,” Kurt said.

“You certainly took your time, didn’t you?” Blaine teased.

“I’m sorry. I have trouble trusting people,” Kurt said, ashamed.

“Don’t be sorry,” Blaine said. “You learnt you had to protect yourself because you’ve been hurt so many times in the past. I did the same thing.”

“I’m still sorry,” Kurt replied. “You know me heart and soul; no one else can say the same.” Blaine opened his mouth to speak but Kurt pressed a finger to his lips. “Shhh, just listen.”

You know my soul.

You know everything about me there's to know.

You know my heart.

How to make me stop and how to make me go.

You should know I love everything

About you. Don't you know

Kurt was grateful for many things in his life this Thanksgiving, but he was most thankful for Blaine. Without Blaine, Kurt wouldn’t be celebrating any holiday at all. He could never repay Blaine for what he had done, but he was determined to find a way, somehow.

That I’m thankful

For the blessing

And the lessons that I’ve learned with you

By my side.

That I’m thankful for the love

That you keep bringing in my life;

In my life,

Thankful, so thankful.

Each day he spent with Blaine was a day filled with love. There could never be a doubt in his mind that Blaine truly loved him, because Kurt saw it reflected in his eyes every day. And he knew those were the eyes he would see every day for the rest of his life.

You know my thoughts

Before I open up my mouth and try to speak.

You know my dreams;

Must be listening when I’m talking in my sleep.

I hope you know

I love having you around me. Don't you know

Some romances end because the couple get tired of each other. But that would never be the case with Kurt and Blaine. They shared their thoughts and dreams, and everything else in between.

That I’m thankful for the blessing

And the lessons that I’ve learned with you

By my side.

That I’m thankful, so thankful for the love

That you keep bringing in my life, in my life.

Kurt and Blaine had learned a lot together the past year and a half. The fact that they had been together such a short amount of time always astounded Kurt; to him it felt like they had spent a lifetime together.

Don't you know that I’m thankful for the moment

When I’m down you always know how to make me smile.

Thankful for the joy that you’re bringing in my life, in my life.

For the lessons that I’ve learned,

For the trouble I’ve known,

For the heartache and pain

That you've thrown in my way.

When I didn't think I could go on,

But you made me feel strong.

With you I am never alone.

Through all the good times and the bad, especially the bad, Blaine had been there. He had held Kurt while he cried, made him laugh and smile, and above all, he made Kurt feel strong. He made Kurt feel wanted. He reminded Kurt that he was not in this fight alone.

Thankful, so thankful.

Thankful for the blessing

And the lessons that I’ve learned with you

By my side.

That I’m thankful, so thankful for the love

That you keep bringing in my life, in my life;

Thankful, so thankful.

When I’m down you always know how to make me smile.

Thankful for the joy that you’re bringing in my life, in my life;

Thankful, so thankful.

Blaine pulled Kurt close, kissing his lips softly. Kurt kissed him back firmly, frowning when Blaine pulled away.

“You don’t have to treat me like a china doll,” Kurt said. He ran his hand down Blaine’s chest, stopping at the waistband of his boxer briefs. “I want you.”

“I don’t want to hurt you,” Blaine protested.

“You won’t,” Kurt assured him. “Please? Make love to me.”

All the fight went out of Blaine and he consented. He tried to memorize every freckle, every mark on his fiancé’s porcelain skin. Their impending separation was looming over them both and Blaine didn’t want to miss a single perfect imperfection. After their lovemaking, Kurt lay with his head on Blaine’s chest.

“I don’t know how I’m going to sleep for thirty days without you beside me,” Kurt said sadly.

“Are you regretting your decision already?” Blaine asked worriedly.

“No, but I don’t want to spend a month away from you,” Kurt answered.

“We won’t be apart. Not really,” Blaine reminded him. He had already begun his apartment search in St. Charles, and a few places looked promising.

“It won’t be the same,” Kurt sighed.

“It will be worth it,” Blaine said steadfastly.

Kurt didn’t reply, but silently he wondered if rehabilitation would work.