CHAPTER TWENTY-NINE

THURSDAY

BLAINE

By some miracle of God, I still hadn't really talked to Santana about the whole Kurt situation by the time Thursday had rolled around. Keeping busy with Atticus Finch had me occupied at work and Santana had been busy at a shoot for another artist this week, so it gave me space from my best friend and – unfortunately – gave me too much time to dwell on Kurt.

Things between he and I seemed to be going really well but I couldn't help but think our last phone conversation had been awkward and he and I hadn't spoken since. Kurt and I having an awkward conversation wasn't something that happened...ever... so this one was hitting me hard because I was worried.

Was Kurt on the same page as I was? I had initially thought so but the fact that he might be embarrassed to be seen with me in front of his roommate made me question. That had to be why he didn't want me to go to his house on Saturday, right?

Just as I was about to continue down this unfortunate train of thought, my cell phone started buzzing on my desk. I saw Kurt's name flash on the caller ID and I rushed to pick it up.

"Kurt?"

"Hey, where are you?"

"What do you mean?"

"Blaine, it's 12:05. I was worried that you were going to stand me up since you're not outside or in the lobby and the security guy won't let me in since I don't have an appointment," Kurt replied, sounding slightly concerned.

Shit, shit, shit. The fact that I had been late two times with Kurt was not helping but I guess I'd been so enveloped in my thoughts that I hadn't noticed the time. "Oh my god, I'm so, so sorry Kurt – I was... uh... distracted. I'm grabbing my things and coming down now."

"It's okay," he breathed in relief. "See you in a minute," he said, ending the call. I cursed internally and gathered my coat and wallet and headed toward the elevator. As the elevator door opened, I saw Santana strolling in; fresh from the set of the shoot she was working at in Brooklyn.

"What's the rush?" she asked as I practically ran into the elevator and quickly pushed the button for the lobby.

"Can't talk – will tell you later," I said waving her off, causing Santana to shrug and head toward her desk.

As the elevator made its way to the lobby, my phone vibrated with a text.

I saw Kurt in the lobby so I'm guessing that's your rush. ;) I'll say this once – treat him well; he deserves it. –S

Santana was surprisingly sweet when you least expected it but it solidified why she and I were friends in the first place. She was a great – albeit obnoxious – friend and I was thankful that she was a mutual friend of both Kurt and I. That would probably come in handy some day.

As I arrived in the lobby, I pocketed my phone and made my way over to Kurt who was standing next to the large glass windows at the front of our building. The way that the sun was hitting his face made him look incredible and I took just a second to admire him before I interrupted his thoughts as he peered out the window. "I'm so sorry I'm late. Again," I said as I walked up to him, drawing Kurt's attention to me.

He smiled and shrugged. "Don't worry, I know you're busy so I figured you had just lost track of time."

I nodded – not willing to admit the real reason why I was late – and motioned toward the revolving door. "Shall we head out?"

"Yes. I have something sort of planned but it's not your typical dining experience."

I shot him a confused look. "What does that mean?"

"Just trust me," he said with a wink.I would trust you with so much that it scares me, I thought to myself.

"Okay," I said as I followed him in through the door. We headed toward Broadway and we walked nearly shoulder-to-shoulder down the street, weaving between tourists and other folks rushing on their lunch break.

"How much time do you have?" Kurt asked as we approached the intersection of 57th and Broadway. We both came to a stop as we waited for the crosswalk to allow us to pass as cabs whizzed by.

"Uh, roughly an hour? I have my phone so if there's an emergency people can contact me. But don't worry about it," I replied. Honestly, I probably shouldn't have taken a lunch break today since things were so busy and I'd spent most of the morning distracted and not checking anything off my to-do list, but I wasn't about to admit that to Kurt.

"Perfect. An hour it is," Kurt said. I smiled and nodded until a group of women had abruptly come to a stop behind Kurt and I. As the group shifted around behind us, one woman pushed her way to the front of their group, practically causing me to fall into the street since she clearly hadn't realized I was in front of her or standing on the small curb.

As I felt my foot slip off the curb, Kurt grabbed my hand and sharply pulled me back on the sidewalk, effectively ending my possible face plant onto the busy street. I heard the woman behind me utter apologies for running into me, but at the moment I was too mesmerized by the feeling of Kurt's hand in my own. When his hand was in mine, the world felt right; his touch made me realize how underappreciated the art of handholding was.

"Are you alright?" Kurt asked as the crosswalk illuminated, signaling it was safe to cross.

"I'm fine," I said with a smile, squeezing his hand in mine. I could feel him loosen his grip as the pressure eased from the squeeze but it only made me squeeze harder, unwilling to let go of his fingers locked between mine. I looked over at Kurt, silently asking if it was alright that I'd done that, only to earn a smile in return as we walked hand-in-hand down the street.

I may have been confused about Kurt and if he was embarrassed of me, but in this moment – with his hand in mine – it didn't matter. He was with me, and that's what counted.

KURT

"So where are we headed?" Blaine asked as we neared Columbus Circle. I hadn't been thinking properly since our near incident with the group of tourists a few blocks back. Seeing Blaine nearly fall into the street scared me half to death and I'm surprised I hadn't screamed at the realization that he could have fallen in the street and gotten hit by a crazy cab driver, but I had somehow remained calm and pulled him back to safety. But after that happened, I had gotten kind of woozy since Blaine had insisted on holding my hand.

It wasn't that we hadn't held hands before – we had obviously already crossed that bridge. But the way I felt with his hand in mine was something spine-tingling that I hadn't felt before and I loved it.

I still wasn't sure if he had wanted to hold my hand – I had only gathered up the strength to hold his in broad daylight because of the crazy tourists who'd knocked him over – because though I was living in New York for years, I still wasn't sure how other gay men felt about PDA.

Personally, I was all for it; I loved holding hands and kissing in public. If a guy and a girl could be affectionate in public, why not two guys or two girls? But I had pulled back on the PDA with William because, well, you know...and I hadn't really been with anyone since so the issue had never come up. And I still wasn't sure what was going on with Blaine and I. Sure, we were dating, but at what point do you call it more? Is there some sort of conversation that needs to be had? Do you ask the guy to be "official"? I was so out of touch I had no idea how this worked between two adults.

"Kurt?" Blaine asked again, forcing me out of my brain for once. "Are you alright?"

"Yeah, sorry, was thinking."

"About what?" he inquired.

"About how hungry I am," I said with a chuckle, hoping it would distract Blaine enough that he wouldn't realize that I was thinking about him and...us.

He didn't seem to notice since he laughed as well. "I'm with you. I didn't realize how hungry I was until you came and picked me up."

"We're nearly there," I said, motioning for the Shops at Columbus Circle. "But remember what I said about how it's not a typical dining experience."

"You realize you're going to have to tell me what it is at some point, right?" he joked.

"I suppose I can let you in on it," I said, feigning irritation. It caused Blaine to laugh and my heart to soar – he had a great laugh. "We're going to Whole Foods."

"Whole Foods?" Blaine asked. Clearly he was confused – why would we want to eat somewhere so loud and busy and... a grocery store.

"We're going to get plates to go from the hot bar and have a picnic. Is that okay?"

Blaine looked surprised, but not unpleased. "That's... great," he practically whispered.

...

Fifteen minutes later, Blaine and I were making our way toward the park. I only had 45 minutes left with Blaine but I wanted to make all of them worthwhile. As we crossed the street, I was sure to grab his hand again and he smiled as he took my fingers between his.

"There's this spot I always sit at a few minutes from here if you don't mind if we sit there. It's on top of some rocks, so you won't get your pants all grassy," I suggested.

Blaine laughed. "I'm not worried about my pants getting messy, but I would be worried if I was wearing what you were," he said, motioning to my red jeans.

"It'll be fine," I replied as we kept down the path. Just ahead on the right, I motioned for Blaine to divert from the sidewalk and head toward the rock formation that was on the outer bank of the park. The formation had us sitting far above the people on the walkway below and if we looked straight down behind us, we could practically see the sidewalk below and the people bustling past. The rocks were a bit slick – likely due to erosion and people like us walking up them over the years – so our handholding became essential when I started to feel my boot slip beneath me.

Blaine tugged on my hand harder and said, "I've got you," as I nearly slid down the rock. His affirmation made me smile. He had me; and hehadme more than he realized and certainly more than I was willing to tell him at this point.

Once we reached the top, we sat down next to each other and started eating. The nice thing about Whole Foods' take-away food was that you could find pretty much anything so I knew it'd be a safe bet no matter what we were in the mood for. I had gone with a caprese salad and some chicken fried tofu and Blaine had opted for a smattering of ethnic options – a lot of lentils, curry and rice bursting in his container.

We ate in silence for a while; just soaking in the sunlight that had emerged in the past few minutes and watching the people below walk by. We happily gobbled down our food and before long we were both finished and purely admiring the scenery around us.

"This is great," Blaine admitted as his voice lulled me from my people watching.

"It's one of my favorite places," I said. "I know it's not as formal as eating in a restaurant or anything, but I thought you might like it."

He nodded. "I love the park. It's my favorite place in New York. That's why I was surprised you wanted to bring me here. It was like... you knew or something. Kind of crazy."

I laughed. "I'm pretty sure we're already beyond crazy with the way we ended up... well, you know," I said, not sure what to call us. Together? Dating?

"Yeah," Blaine whispered. "Why did you choose to come here?" he asked.

I sighed. "When I first came to New York, I was totally drawn in by the lights of the city and I was enthralled with the busy-ness that came with it. I spent tons of time just soaking up the lights and sounds of the city – I don't think I even ventured into the park until after my sophomore year.

"But after awhile, the city felt overwhelming; life was overwhelming. And I felt like I couldn't find peace anywhere. There was no solace, no alone time. But then I came here when one of my friends cancelled on me going to The Met. And I ended up sitting here and just watching and thinking. And it was then that I decided that this was the place where I could feel centered again."

I didn't want to mention that part of the reason I needed the alone time was due to my break-up with William – it was far too soon for that – but even the fact that I was sharing something so personal with Blaine was new for me.

But I looked over at him and he had a slight smile on his face. "Thank you," he said softly.

"For what?" I asked.

"For telling me about this place – but really, for sharing it with me. I love the park too, but knowing how you feel connected to it... makes it even better somehow."

Blaine's comment caused me to blush. When he said things like that, it made him seem like he was a figment of my imagination, but feeling his warmth next to my body kept me grounded in the fact that he was real.

Blaine became even more real to me as he took my hand and clasped his fingers with mine and placed our joined hands on his knee as we sat next to each other. I gasped at the contact but shifted so I was sitting even closer to him and I leaned my head onto his shoulder. Our closeness felt so comfortable and... familiar, as if we'd been together for a while already. We hadn't had any Defining The Relationship talks, but our physical connection now spoke volumes.

My head sat contentedly at the crook of Blaine's neck and I just breathed him in. His scent was infectious and I was fairly certain I would forever associate this joyous smell with Blaine for the rest of my life. In a fleeting moment I felt Blaine's hand tighten around mine and I could feel him speaking to me because of the reverberations in his chest, but I wasn't really listening. I was too drawn into the way his jaw was moving and how if he said just the right word, his cheek would brush against my forehead and push me closer into his neck.

In a moment I found my nose directly against Blaine's cheek and I felt him stop speaking and inhale sharply. Blaine rolled his neck to try and look at me, forcing the skin of his neck to my lips and I felt myself panting at his neck. He shivered at the contact and I pursed my lips to kiss his neck lightly. Blaine responded with a sigh and he let go of our joined hand as he moved his arm to wrap behind me – coincidentally shifting us closer and reaching a new level of closeness we hadn't yet achieved.

I pulled back slightly as Blaine looked at me with a shy smile and he moved closer to join our lips. The tentative kiss felt warm and fuzzy and I was practically drunk of Blaine's... existence surrounding me so thoroughly.

Blaine broke our kiss and pulled back to breathe but I couldn't let that happen – my lips chased his and I caught his mouth in a half-open state. Rather than force an innocent kiss, I decided that I wanted more - more pressure of his arm at my back, more of his scent to linger on my clothes, and definitely more kissing.

I decided against pursing my lips and instead lightly sucked on Blaine's extended lower lip. This caused Blaine to pull me in closer and I felt his tongue dip lightly out of his mouth and graze over my lip. I relieved the suction on his lip and gently took his tongue in its place – and I was rewarded for this action by a heavenly sound emitted by Blaine.

I felt his tongue move slightly between my lips and I opened my mouth fully, giving our tongues what they had been searching for. Blaine's hand at my back remained firm and strong, but the way our tongues moved against each other's remained soft and sweet. I didn't think that this could ever be sweet; tongues thrashing and harsh sucking due to passion, yes. But never so soft, sweet and... almost loving.

Our tongues mixed together and the drunkenness I'd felt before reached a whole new level as I savored every passing second with Blaine attached to my mouth. In any of my past relationships, I would have been hyper aware of the fact that I was full on making out with a guy in the park, but with Blaine I just didn't care. The way our lips and tongues perfectly meshed together made everything else irrelevant; time stood still, the earth stopped moving – nothing existed except for us.

I could feel Blaine's breaths from his nose gracing the flesh on my cheek, but it was soon replaced with Blaine's free hand on my cheek. He gently rubbed his thumb along my cheekbone until his fingertips traced along the hair behind my ear. The hand on my cheek and the slight pressure it produced forced our mouths and tongues closer together but the kiss never felt rushed or like there was too much pressure.

It was the singular most perfect kiss I had ever had.

HONK! HONK!

Startled, I released Blaine's tongue from my mouth and pulled away. I hadn't entirely forgotten where we were but I did realize that as hot as this make out session was, it would have to come to an end at some point since we were on a time crunch here.

I opened my eyes only to see Blaine peeking back at me through those luscious lashes of his. "Wow," he said as he rested his forehead against mine.

"Yeah." I giggled. "Sorry that the horn interrupted us."

"It's okay," he said breathily. I could feel his words on my cheek, causing me to shudder. "I probably have to go back to work soon anyway," he sighed.

I sighed as well. After that, I didn't really want to do anything else. I would have held Blaine – and his mouth – hostage for the rest of the day to make him my kissing slave, but I guess we had to be real adults and go to work and stuff.

Annoying.

I glanced down at my watch to note the time. "We should go," I said, still unwilling to move away from the pressure of our foreheads as they touched.

"I don't want to," he whispered.

"I know," I replied. "But I'll see you Saturday."

"Saturday," he said with a smile as he backed away, shifting around to pull himself off the ground. He stood up and brushed off a bit of debris that had clung to his pants and I was at the perfect height to stare at his ass as he continued to dust himself off.

Damn. I was not complaining at the view...

"Ready?" Blaine asked as he reached his hand out to help me up. I smiled and graciously took his hand and pulled myself off the ground with a slight grunt.

"I feel old," I said as I heard my knees crack slightly at the sudden movement.

He laughed. "I don't think we can be old until we're in our late thirties. We still have time."

"I guess. But just remember, I'm older than you," I noted. "So older means wiser."

"Yes sir," he said with a salute.

...

The walk back to his office was silent but happy as I dwelled in the fantastic way Blaine felt against my lips. I was already eager to engage in another make out session with him and though the thought of being physically forward after only a few dates was unusual for me – especially given my guarded nature in relationships – I felt that it didn't bother me that things were different than my past relationships or hook ups. Things were different;Blainewas different.

"I really don't want to go back to work," Blaine groaned as we reached the entryway. "But at least there's Saturday, right?"

I nodded. "Yes. Do you – uh – does 4 work for you to meet up?"

"Sure," he replied. "I'll be sure to pick up a present for them tonight."

"Oh, don't go until tomorrow. They aren't registered yet," I noted.

"Aren't they supposed to do that before they have an engagement party?" he asked.

I laughed. "That's what I said. I'm helping Santana register tomorrow so if you get your gift tomorrow night or Saturday morning you should be fine."

He looked like he was about to ask something, but paused and shook his head – as if letting whatever thought he had go out of his head. "Okay," he said. He looked at his watch. "I hate to leave but I really need to head back in." He pulled my hand and drew me closer to him, embracing me tightly while our hands remained clasped between us. "I had a really good time," he whispered against my ear.

"I did too," I agreed. "See you Saturday, Blaine."

"Saturday," he mimicked. He backed away slowly but he didn't pull away entirely as he placed a soft kiss to my lips. "See you then."

He pulled away – but just barely – and I felt his lips brush against mine again in yet another soft kiss. But that wasn't enough this time; not after I'd felt the pressure of his tongue against mine. I pushed him a bit harder into the kiss and I could almost feel my mouth pulling away the softness of his kiss and replacing it with my own fervent, harder, passionate kiss.

As I backed away from a now-breathless Blaine, I was surprised to see his eyes closed and his lips pursed, as if they were wondering where I had gone. I couldn't help but chuckle slightly at his pose and he opened his eyes.

"Seriously? I have to leave you after that?" he barked.

I shrugged but leaned in – whispering to him as if it was a secret just between us. "I need to keep you intrigued for next time."

He let out a hushed moan – though I'm sure he'd deny the action. "You say that as if it wasn't already the case," he muttered quietly.

To placate him, I kissed him gently on the cheek and bid him farewell. As Blaine walked back toward the revolving doors of the building, he took a moment to glance back at me and I shot him a small wave. I couldn't help but feel a sense of pride as I saw the beaming smile on his face knowing that I had put it there.

In the world of gay men, we may not always be up front about our feelings. I mean, come on – we're guys; we don't always do "feelings" or "emotions." But with a guy like Blaine I didn't care about the status quo as it relates to gay men.

I was falling for him, but I needed to know where we stood.

"Saturday," I muttered to myself as I saw his figure disappear into the belly of the building. "I'm sick of waiting and wondering. Saturday I'm going to find out if he wants to be with me. Exclusively."