Through Different Eyes - Pilgrims Progress

Part One - Thanksgiving 2008

“Kurt! I thought you wanted to work on this project and get it out of the way before Thanksgiving!  You aren't paying any attention!” Rachel nudged Kurt on the living room couch in her dads' house.  “This counts for half our marking period grade!”

Startled, Kurt took his eyes off the front door.  “Erm … sorry.  Uh.  Not to change the subject, but where's your brother?”

“At the soup kitchen with his Webelo den.  They're helping get ready for Thanksgiving dinner tomorrow."

Kurt casually took a handful of cookies from the tray that the Berry dads had left for them to munch on while working on their ninth grade English project.  “Yeah … I meant your other brother.  I thought Cooper was coming home for the holiday weekend.”

Rachel gave him a suspicious look.  “Cooper texted me a half hour ago.  He's meeting his high school buddies at the Lima Bean. We wont see him till tomorrow.”

“What makes you say that?” Kurt asked, trying to keep his voice neutral.

Picking the phone up off the coffee table, Rachel read the texts from Cooper.

*I dont mean to be overly dramatical but except 4 u i hate all women now *

Kurt choked a little on his cookie.

*my gf broke up w me on facebook wtf is that even *

*i mean it rae i'm thru w women 4 good*

*gonna meet my bros at the Bean tell dads will b home by 12 ok*

*love ya*

She tossed her phone on the table.  “So, our dads are going to be in a snit when he rolls in late, and then wants to sleep in tomorrow.  Grandma Berry is coming and there's a million things to do to get ready, and he'll probably be hung over,” Rachel groused.  “Hes such a drama queen."

“You should talk,” Kurt defended Cooper.  Cooper Anderson was amazing, the handsomest guy he'd ever known.  He had gone to LA after high school to be an actor, and had already booked some commercials, and kurt knew hed be a huge star someday.  If he was a little theatrical, so what, that just was because he was an artist.

“Point taken,” Rachel conceded. “Its a family trait. But never mind Cooper. I want to get this project done while we have the house to ourselves, before Bouncing Ball Blaine gets home and decides to tap dance on the table.  I don't want this on my mind on Thanksgiving.  Speaking of that, what are you and your dad bringing? Something vegetarian, I hope?”

“Pumpkin pie,” Kurt said, glancing at his watch.  “Listen.  I forgot  … I promised Dad I'd work in the shop this afternoon… I'd better get going.”

Rachel was instantly furious.  “Kurt, no!  We've barely scratched the surface of this comparison of “The Wiz”, “The Wizard of Oz” and “Wicked”!”  

Kurt packed up his notebook and copies of the books hurriedly.  “Sorry!  I'll call you later and we can compare notes on the phone.”  Over Rachel's continued protests, he fled out the door.  He hurried down the block to the bus stop, and spotted the bus rounding the corner.  Waving frantically, he broke into a full run, making it just in time.

As he sank into his seat with a sigh, he nervously smoothed his clothes and hair.  He could always wait to see Cooper again tomorrow, he supposed, but … he really didn't want to wait another minute.  He dreamily thought about Cooper's piercing blue eyes, his perfect jawline.  His awesome hair.  Everything about him was perfect.  He pulled the cord for the stop at the strip mall, and eagerly disembarked, praying that Cooper would still be there.  

Blaines Webelo den was unloading items from their food drive outside the soup kitchen, across from the coffee shop.  Kurt tossed a wave to Blaine, adorable as usual in his plaid Webelo cap and scarf.  Blaine had been a scout since his birth parents were alive and he was a Tiger Cub. Kurt disapproved of the Boy Scouts in general as an organization, but the local den mother was progressive and had no issue with the Berry dads religion or sexuality. Blaine was in soccer, little league, karate, Hebrew school, jazz and tap, horseback riding, voice and piano; but he still had overflowing excess energy left over, that had to be put somewhere. So for now, at least, Blaine was innocently participating as a Webelo in every camp out and food drive and Pinewood Derby and other scouting event possible, and had a bright red felt vest full of badges to show for it.  

"Kurt!" Blaine squeaked excitedly, running over. Blaine was always excited.  "We filled three trucks this year! Its a Den 106 record! Maybe even a pack record!" He pulled at Kurts sleeve. "Kurt, isnt that great! Kurt!"

"Thats awesome, buddy," Kurt said. "Hey, Im heading over to the Lima Bean now, okay? Great job on the food drive--Ill see you at dinner tomorrow and hear all about it."  Kurt patted Blaine on the shoulder with a smile and hurried away.

Entering the coffee shop, he glanced around and saw that the object of his affections was, in fact, still there with his old high school buddies.  He gave a little wave and after a pause, Cooper waved back, sending electric shocks through Kurt's susceptible heart.  Oh, God, Cooper was handsomer than ever.  Kurt went to the register and bought a latte, trying to still his beating heart.  Looking nervously at Cooper, he took his beverage a few tables away, to the only empty table in the room, next to a group of giggly college girls, and sat down where he could adore this perfect human being from afar.

Trying to act casual, he sipped his latte and glanced nervously over it at Cooper, and was thrilled to see Cooper .... sneaking a peek back at him?  Kurt half-smiled back at him, unsure, and nearly passed out when Cooper flashed a brilliant return smile … and a wink.

Kurt set his drink down and pressed his hand to his heart.  He had to calm down. But ... Cooper had sworn off women … and yes, that was a definite flirtatious wink, right here in the middle of the Lima Bean.  Maybe he was wrong.  Maybe there was a God after all.   Maybe Cooper was gay and maybe he … maybe he was interested!  Sure, he was a lot older.  He was nearly  twenty, and Kurt was still fourteen.  But … if that didn't bother Cooper ...!  But how to signal that he was interested?

Then a stroke of pure genius hit.  Kurt headed over to the register, where the owner, Miss Althea, was polishing the counter.

“That latte too strong for you, Kurt?  I can get you a milk chocolate - -”

He shook his head.  “No, Ma'am.  I - - I want to send a coffee to somebody.  With a note.”  Grabbing a napkin and a pen from beside the register, he started writing.  “It's for Cooper Anderson over there,” he explained.

“Isn't he a little old for you?” Althea asked dubiously.  “And also a little straight?  He's in here with a different girl every time I've ever seen him.”

“You don't see a girl over there now, do you?” Kurt finished the note, including an invitation to the movies, and initialed it.  “He's finally realized girls aren't worth the trouble.”  Looking up into Miss Althea's narrowed eyes, he amended, “I mean, present company excluded of course.”

Scowling, Althea rang up the purchase and waved him back to his seat.  He sat down and picked up his coffee, watching covertly as Althea plunked the hot drink down in front of Cooper, and slid Kurt's note alongside it.  

Kurt went cold all over despite the coffee.  He must have gone completely insane to send a love letter on a fucking napkin to someone who was twenty and … oh God, what if Cooper told Rachel?  She'd tell everybody in Glee.  He'd have to leave town.  He wasn't even out, and neither was Cooper, and here he lost his head and hit on the guy in public?  What was he thinking?  He started to get up and flee, but then caught a glimpse of Cooper.

Wonderful Cooper, who actually smiled at the note and then over in Kurts direction.  

And then ... Cooper ... pointed at him.

Kurts heart stopped entirely.

Cooper scribbled something on the note and handed it back to Miss Althea, before slapping his friends on the back, winking at Kurt again, and gesturing to the door.  Swinging on his jacket, he headed out.

Miss Althea came over, looking impressed. “Okay, Kurt, I guess I was wrong.  He said to deliver this answer.”

Kurt took the napkin back from Althea's hand and read it.  “K - Meet me at my car.  It's a Green Prius. Coop.  P.S. You're cute.”

Hands trembling, he folded the napkin carefully, pressed it to his lips, and then placed it in his pocket.  He would keep this forever.  Someday he would show their children … their grandchildren, his and Coopers first love letter.  

Walking outside, heart thumping, he saw Cooper leaning on his car, checking himself in the plate glass window across from his parking spot.  His heart melted.  He'd never thought Cooper could be nervous, but … he squared his thin shoulders and ran a hand under his bangs, making sure they were perfect.  

He was a little scared, actually, as he approached.  He wasn't out yet … he'd never kissed anyone … never even held hands.  Cooper was twenty, and … well, he might expect more than kissing at some point.  Probably he would.  And Kurt wasn't fifteen yet, and … wow.  Sex.  He liked boys, he knew that.  He liked looking at men in the magazines April Rhodes had given him, but actually doing it, he wasn't sure if he was ready for that.  But Cooper was looking up, and he was so beautiful, like a movie star - - and - -

“Hey, handsome,” he blurted.  

Cooper frowned slightly.  “Excuse me?”

“Uh - - so  - - I got your note, and I - - I think you're pretty cute too, and … well, here I am.”

“My note?”

Kurt didn't understand why Cooper was acting so weird.  “Yes. The one telling me to meet you out here and saying yes to the movies - and - -”  Cooper was looking even more confused than usual.  They stood there staring at each other for a long minute when Karin Hadley, one of the girls who had been seated behind him at the Lima Bean, came giggling by with her friends.

“Hey, Coop!  Going to the big party at Steve's later?” she simpered, twirling a long blonde ringlet around her finger and releasing it with a bouncy spring.  

“Uh - yeah.  See you there?”

A chorus of giggles met Cooper's question, before the girls bounced away to their car and sped off waving and laughing.  Not a care in the world.  And why not.  The world belonged to them and their kind, didn't it?

He held his head up, and willed his chin to stop trembling, willed the tears back.  “I see there's been a … misunderstanding.  I apologize.”

“Kurt - dude - “

“Don't,” Kurt said tersely, trying to keep his voice low, dignified.  “It's … it's not a big deal.  And it's not your fault.  Of course you assumed a girl sent it.  Of course that's the default, isn't it?:

Cooper still looked mystified, and Kurt shook his head in weariness and humiliation.  “I … I trust you'll be a … a gentleman about this … and not mention it to anyone?  To Rachel?”

“Don't worry, kid.  And don't feel bad.  You're right, it's not a big deal.  You're not exactly the first dude who's taken a shot at the Coop.”

“Right,” Kurt said, turning and starting off toward the bus stop, keeping his pace casual.

“Seeya at Thanksgiving Dinner tomorrow, then!” Cooper called, and Kurt cringed internally.  He heard Cooper beep his car open and get in, and watched him drive by with a wave.  

As soon as Cooper was out of sight, he let his posture slump in defeat.  How could he have been so stupid as to think … that somebody could be interested in him that way?  Someone like Cooper?  That there was somebody else like him, a young man that could like him back, even in theory?  

He leaned against the retaining wall where the bus stopped, and stared moodily at the road.  He didn't even know when the next bus was due.  It didn't matter.  There was nowhere he could go on that bus that would take him away from this crappy town, or from who and what he was in it: nothing.  He was nothing, and nobody would ever love him, and - -

“Hey! Kurt! Kurt! Kurt, hey!” a piping little voice shrieked in his ear.

Kurt raised his eyes and rested them on the little uniformed boy who had landed unceremoniously at his side on the ledge of the retaining wall, and was leaning over holding up a small green cash card..  

“Didja get your drink at the Lima Bean already?  Didja?  Didja finish in there?  ‘Cause I'm done here and I'm supposed to wait for my dads at the Lima Bean.  They gave me my own Lima Bean card and I have ten dollars on it!  I can get us some hot chocolate! My treat!”

“Blaine - -” Kurt started, but Blaine was just warming up.

“I can get two medium hot chocolates and one cookie to share.  Or I can get two small hot chocolates and two cookies.  They have turkey-shaped ones today for Thanksgiving that looked pretty good.  Or I can get three cookies and one hot chocolate if you already had a drink and aren't thirsty.  Or - -”

Kurt was getting positively dizzy from Blaine's calculations and prattling.  He sighed.  “Blaine - - I'm going back to my house now, buddy, okay - - I already had a coffee - -”

Blaine's eyes dimmed in disappointment.  “Oh.  Okay.”

“I'll see you tomorrow at Thanksgiving dinner, though.”

“Sure,” Blaine said vaguely, picking at one of his innumerable Cub Scout badges.  It looked like …. ‘welding'?  Could someone have given this ball of pure ten-year-old energy a welding torch?  But Kurt realized … Blaine's energy level had dropped to nil after he refused the little boy's invitation.  He was pouting and silent, and after a moment, he whispered, “See you tomorrow, then,” and eased himself off the ledge to the ground.

Watching Blaine trudge off dejectedly, Kurt couldn't take it. “Blaine?”

The boy turned around, big eyes round and sad like the saddest anime ever drawn.

“Actually, a nice turkey cookie sounds pretty great … I had a bad day and that would really cheer me up.  Thank you.”  And oddly enough, the radiant smile from his small friend took some of the sting from the rejection of his big brother.  He put an arm around Blaine's shoulders and they headed back to the Lima Bean together.