The end of the weekend passed in a blur, full of cuddles and kisses. When Monday came, Blaine went back to his and Cooper's place. He quickly made his way around the apartment and opened his bedroom door. He reached a box at the end of his wardrobe and pulled it out. He opened it and extracted a black portfolio. The box contained lots of letters and different objects, but today Blaine was just interested in the portfolio. He carefully put it into his bag and left.

When he finally arrived home he was a bit late but he had called Anita to warn her. They – both Kurt and Anita – were sitting in the living room, chatting and drinking tea. It was what life should be Blaine thought, goinghome to someone you deeply cared about and having a home full of laughter and happiness.

He was interrupted by Anita,

"Hello Mr. Anderson. I left you something to eat in the kitchen, I know it's not my job but I thought maybe for once I could overstep. "

"Thank you, Anita. I'm sorry I kept you here for so long."

"It's alright, don't worry. But now I really have to go, I have a date with a really nice man and it doesn't happen to me every day!"

She rushed out and noisily shut the door. Blaine and Kurt ate in a comfortable silence, glancing at each other and smiling softly.

When they both got tired Blaine helped Kurt get into bed.

"I have something for you!" Blaine announced. He went out of the room and came back with the black portfolio. "I went to my place tonight, that's why I was late. And I got this for you. I know you wondered about your work so here it is. These are all the articles you wrote for the magazine." He handed the portfolio to Kurt and watched him open it. Kurt didn't read any of the articles; he just turned the page, to acknowledge how many articles he had written in the past. Then he closed it and put it on the night stand.

"I'll read them tomorrow. Thank you for giving me this. How come it was at your place if it's my portfolio?"

Blaine fidgeted and looked nervous before glancing at Kurt and answering after taking a deep breath:

"Actually, I was the one collecting your articles and putting them in the portfolio. This is my portfolio about you." It sounded creepy to Blaine. He had had a portfolio full of his ex-boyfriend's articles hidden somewhere at his place. I just reached step one in 'How to become a psychopath' Blaine thought.

"That's nice of you, Thank you. Goodnight kiss?"

"Goodnight kiss." Blaine agreed and tenderly kissed Kurt's lips. He retreated to the living room and slept peacefully.

The rest of the week was eventless. Kurt studied his portfolio, doing research on Blaine's computer. He tried to understand all the references he was making in his articles and looked for all the clothes he mentioned as well. It was tiring to see all the things he'd miss. Well, not missed but forgotten. How was he supposed to write again if he had no idea what had happened in the fashion world during five, almost six years?

Blaine worked harder that week. His almost-success in glee the week before had given him a bit of hope and he was determined to keep on progressing.

Friday came and finally it was 'Cast Removal Day', as Kurt called it. Blaine drove them to the hospital and checked in with the nurse.

They waited a bit and the doctor made them follow him.

"Okay gentlemen. This is the big day. You're going to be free from your casts. Just a fair warning: your leg and arm were in plaster for several weeks, so they are going to be covered with scruff and drying skin. It's also going to smell pretty bad and they are going to look stunted. Don't worry about any of that, though. You'll just need some re-education and a bit of sport and you'll look good again!"

With that he started to cut the cast on Kurt's leg. It seemed that the doctor had been wrong; the smell wasn't bad, it was way worse. It smelled like death and decay.

"So very sexy." Kurt muttered. Blaine chuckled and kissed him lightly.

"It's alright, you just look like you're starring in a zombie movie. It has its appeal." Kurt pouted at that and refused to talk to Blaine. The doctor took care of his arm cast after that and Kurt was finally free. He smelled, might need a whole container of body lotion but at least he was free of the casts.

A nurse helped Kurt to clean his arm and leg and showed him the different movements he should practice every day to make his arm and leg muscles grow. The doctor talked with them about a light re-education and then made an appointment a month later to check on Kurt.

Kurt couldn't completely walk by himself but he was determined to, so Blaine just stood behind him to catch him if he fell. They reached the car and drove back home.

"I can't believe I'm finally free! Free, Blaine! I'm going to run every day and do lots of sport and have a walk in the park at any hour! I can cook now! And hold things!" Kurt exclaimed.

"I'm glad that it makes you so happy. I didn't know holding things could be so important to you." Blaine joked.

"Well, there is that and also now that I'm cast-less you can come back to our bed." Kurt added with a wink.

Blaine didn't answer and continued driving. Kurt frowned but didn't say a thing either, maybe what he'd said didn't need an answer because it was a silent agreement that Blaine was coming back to their bed.

They entered the apartment, Blaine still making sure that Kurt wasn't falling at any time.

"Admit it; you're not doing this to help me but just to stare at my butt." Kurt said cockily. He then turned swiftly and engulfed Blaine in a tight hug. Kissing his forehead, his temple and finally his lips. Blaine didn't move at first, but quickly kissed Kurt back and began to wriggle out of the hug. Once again, Kurt frowned but kept his mouth shut. It was not how he had expected the evening to start.

Later that night, Kurt sat down on the couch to watch TV.

"Babe, come sit with me. We are going to watch TV while cuddling!" Kurt beamed. Blaine looked panicked and almost afraid. Kurt could almost see the wheels turning in Blaine's head.

"Blaine, sit down." Kurt almost ordered.

"I..hum… we shouldn't…. I mean, what I'm trying to say…"

"Stop that and just sit down already." Kurt was growing furious and frustrated. Why couldn't his boyfriend just sit with him?

"I…have things to work on. I'll be in the kitchen."

"Blaine!" Kurt shouted, Blaine instantly froze and waited for the downfall. Kurt stood up and started yelling:

"Seriously, Blaine, all I'm asking is for you to come and sit down with me, how is that so difficult? You know what's difficult, Blaine? Losing five years' worth of memories and not remembering who you are, it's waking up and finding out that your boyfriend isn't the same and can't even bear to be close to you, it's trying to figure out by yourself what your job is and how you're gonna keep it when you know that you can't be as good as before because you have no idea what you're talking about. That's difficult, Blaine. Sitting with me isn't! I wake up in a crappy hospital surrounded by everyone but you! I lost five years and there is a possibility that I will never remember. That being said, I'm supposed to be someone I don't even know! I don't write articles! I don't even remember writing a blog or a diary so I can't really imagine myself being a writer. But you know what? It's something I can learn again. I could just take classes and drown myself in fashion shows and magazines so I'll be able to catch up on that. I don't know who I am anymore and I don't know who I am supposed to be, but I don't even care because I could just start being a brand new me!" Kurt cried and shouted, his hands motioning what he was saying into the air.

Blaine had turned around to face Kurt. But the more Kurt ranted, the smaller Blaine made himself. Eyes locked on the floor, arms around his body. He was silent and didn't dare look at Kurt; the self-loathing, the insecurity and the shame all coming back in a flood and pouring out in his body language.

"But the worst thing isn't not knowing who I am or how to keep up with my job, it's not losing five years of memories because at the end of the day I don't care about that. The worst thing is that when I woke up you weren't there. And you're still not! I don't know who you are Blaine, I don't recognize my boyfriend, and I don't recognize you. I don't know what to think, there are moments when you act so sweetly and like a boyfriend but most of the time you just act like we're not even in relationship anymore, you act like you don't care and like our relationship doesn't matter to you. You're not helping me remember, you're not sharing anything. You don't talk to me about our life and about what it is to live here! I can't ask you because every time I tried you just closed yourself off. I am lost, Blaine! I am utterly lost and afraid and I need you! But you don't even want to touch me for too long, or cuddle with me for too long. You don't want to sleep with me or even be near me. I didn't lose just five years of my memories, I didn't just lose my past, I also lost my future because I lost you! I lost my boyfriend and I have no idea how to get him back. I don't know what happened to you, to us. I can't be your support system and my own at the same time, Blaine." At this point Kurt was crying and the fact that Blaine still hadn't looked at him was infuriating.

"Look at me, Blaine! Just look at me! I can't stand it anymore. I can't stand to be in the same room as you if you keep me at distance. I am sorry for what I might have done to you to make you so disgusted at me or so scared of what I might do. I'm sorry I screwed up so badly that you can't even open up to me anymore or want to be with me. But I can't do it anymore. I just want my boyfriend back and for him to tell me that everything's gonna be okay and that I'm safe. Because you have no idea how scared and lost I am!"

With a final shout, Kurt stormed out of the room and slammed the bedroom door loudly.

Blaine stood there, eyes still locked on the floor, tears slowly rolling down his cheeks.

He turned off the light and lay on the couch, waiting for sleep to come or for Kurt to come out of the room, but neither happened.

All Blaine could think about was how much he'd screwed up this time. He hurt Kurt, made him feel unsafe, lost and alone. But he didn't know how to make things better. He was not Kurt's boyfriend and couldn't act like he was. But not acting on it meant that he was hurting Kurt. Not acting on it also meant keeping him from really falling for the pretense, to really wonder what he felt for Kurt. Not acting on it also meant preserving himself. But tonight Kurt had been honest with him, and did not hide any of his emotion. He stated how alone and scared he was. And he made it clear that he needed Blaine. Unfortunately it was not him that Kurt needed. Kurt needed old Blaine: the one that made silly jokes and sang at the top of his lungs whilst climbing on furniture. The Blaine that was not so broken and felt so worthless. Kurt didn't need this Blaine, but the old one, and bubbly Blaine was long-gone. And Blaine didn't know how to act or what to do. He wanted Kurt's happiness; he wanted Kurt to smile and to have a boyfriend that kept him safe, that helped him remember. And it couldn't be him, because he didn't know Kurt anymore. He didn't know what made him smile or what made him feel safe. He didn't know what Kurt's life was because he wasn't a part of it.

Long after their fight the sun finally rose and Blaine had yet to go to sleep. But he had made a decision. He couldn't keep fighting and he couldn't keep acting half like a boyfriend. It was either all or nothing. And because Blaine couldn't stay away from Kurt, couldn't stay away from how good he felt around Kurt and how right it was for him to know that Kurt was around it was going to be all. He was going to be Kurt's boyfriend. He was going to completely act on it. He'll deal with the consequences later. He was just going to hurt himself anyway and it was worth it if it helped Kurt feel better and if it helped him remember.

Blaine quietly closed the door and made his way around the block, finding the bakery he was looking for. It was still early, after all, and no one was around which meant he had time to make his choice. Lots of different cupcakes were presented and with so many different flavors: chocolate, cinnamon, lemon, raspberry, oreos. Blaine had choices, perhaps too many.

"Excuse me?" The waitress made her way to Blaine, smiling at him, "Hello, I'd like some cheesecake but there doesn't seem to be one…"

"Oh, I'm still setting everything up. But I have four whole cheesecakes in the kitchen. How many slices do you want?" The waitress asked nicely.

"I'll… I'll take one cheesecake. I mean, the whole cake." The waitress nodded and disappeared to what seemed to be the kitchen. When she reappeared she was holding a white box with blue stripes.

"Here's the cheesecake, is it alright? Do you want something else?"

"No, thank you, that would be it."

Blaine paid quickly and got back to the apartment. Kurt was still sleeping, so Blaine made them coffee, preparing Kurt's like he did since he'd moved in. He then set the box and Kurt's mug onto the tray. Silently, Blaine entered Kurt's room and put the tray down right beside Kurt's side of the bed. Far enough so Kurt wouldn't stumble on it but close enough so he would be able to pick it up from his bed. Blaine closed the door and went back into the living room to grade papers.

An hour later, Kurt exited his room and put the cheesecake on the table in front of the couch, not saying a single word. He got to the kitchen and warmed his coffee before falling graciously on the floor, sitting Indian-style in front of the cheesecake.

Blaine could feel Kurt's eyes on him, but he didn't dare looked up or down to see him. He had no idea how to break the heavy silence. But Kurt decided for him and suddenly Blaine saw a spoon being waved in front of his eyes.

"Take the spoon, Blaine, and eat your feelings with me." It was commanding, but Blaine could feel the caring behind it. So he sat down on the floor, mirroring Kurt and started eating the cheesecake.

"I'm sorry, Blaine. I should never have said what I said last night. Or I should've but more nicely and without screaming and yelling at you. It's just that the last week has been hard. And when you stayed far away from me last night I lost it. I'm sorry, really sorry. But Blaine, I don't understand. You keep everything to yourself and sometimes I have the feeling that we are getting better and more normal, like before and sometimes it's just like when I woke up. I don't know what I did to you, I don't remember but I want to understand. Please, please talk to me. Tell me what happened between us so we can fix it and be happy again. I want you back in our bed Blaine. I don't remember sleeping in it with you, save for one night, but it feels wrong without you in it. It feels wrong to wake up and not have you by my side." Kurt almost whispered the last part, not sure if this was going to scare Blaine or make him understand how much he missed him.

"I… I'm sorry too, Kurt. I know I haven't been a good boyfriend these past weeks. And I'm sorry. I can't explain to you what you are asking because of your memories but I swear I'm going to work on us, with you. I'm going to do everything it takes to make you feel safe and to let you know that's it's gonna be okay. I'm sorry Kurt, so sorry. You deserve so much better…"

Kurt took Blaine's hand in his and squeezed it lightly, waiting for Blaine to stop looking at the cheesecake. When Blaine finally looked up Kurt smiled warmly and broadly at him.

"I don't want anyone else, I want you. Yes, I'm pissed that you can't explain what happened. I'm not going to push because I promised you, and my dad and Carole. But I want you, and we are going to work together on this," Kurt's hand motioned between them, "But I need you to open up sometimes, to tell me what you are thinking or feeling. I can't do it if you don't talk to me."

"Okay."

They ate more of the cheesecake, hand in hand, because Kurt hadn't let go of Blaine's, and Blaine discovered that it didn't bother him all that much, quite the contrary. Kurt's hand was like an anchor and he liked that, holding hands with Kurt.

"How did you know I'd want to eat cheesecake for breakfast?" Kurt interrogated

"Because I'm your boyfriend." Blaine hadn't meant to say that. But the minute it came out of his mouth he knew it was true; he had decided it this morning.

He was Kurt Hummel's boyfriend.