By the end of classes on Monday, everyone at Dalton knew Kurt was leaving. Only Jeff seemed to be sad about it. Jeff sat at the foot of Kurt's bed, looking over at the pale boy, thinking how much he'd miss him. In the last few months, Jeff actually bonded with Kurt. They'd competed for a solo, sure, but if you live with Kurt, you begin to realize every good thing about him. Every little quirk of kindness that he exuded. He could be catty, sure, but he knew it. There was just so much goodness wrapped up in Kurt. Jeff found himself loving Kurt's company. He was like the brother he never had. The relationship was close, and Kurt and Jeff both knew that
“I know you're leaving, dude, but it's going to be so hard with you gone. You were just starting to get Blaine to get off his high horse and let some of the rest of us have a bit of spotlight. Not to mention, I'm going to be bunking alone for the rest of the year. I wish I could transfer with you.”
Kurt looked at his roommate. Jeff was the thing that Kurt thought he'd miss most about Dalton. They'd developed the kind of relationship that Kurt had always craved growing up. They were creatively symbiotic, and even complimented each other when not singing. Kurt knew that it'd be hard to go back to being an only child, even if his brother was only in mind, and not blood.
“Jeff, I'm going to miss you so badly, but this is just something I've gotta do. The atmosphere here has just become too...stuffy. I miss McKinley. I may have gotten slushied, bullied, and beaten, but God. I was so free. The kids there, they may have been stupid, and everyone knew that they couldn't dress to save their lives, but they were who they were, and they didn't apologize.
“There weren't any traditions to hold them back. There wasn't a baby version of a two hundred year canary sitting on their windowsills. There wasn't a trial by upperclassmen every time someone wanted to sing out. If you wanted to be in the spotlight, you just needed the talent and the balls! I love the no-bullying policy here at Dalton, but all the red-tape just takes away so much! I love being here with you, and I used to love being with Blaine. I was so enamored with the fact that I could come here and not be thrown into a locker, I was willing to not look into the repercussions of leaving New Directions.
“I loved it here so much for the first few weeks. It was like a dream. But now, Jeff? Now, it just feels like there's a giant pillow over the mouth of my creativity. I wish you could come with me too. You have no idea. But we both know how your parents would react to you picking up and saying 'Oh hey, I'm gonna go to a public school where my clothes can be whichever color I want them to be'.”
Jeff looked at the boy in front of him. During his rant, he'd stood up and now was silhouetted against the rainy backdrop of his window. The canary was peeping nervously at the pale boy, and flitted from the perch to the cage's sides with an anxious air. Jeff smiled warmly and stood up next to Kurt, grabbing the boy's shoulders.
“Listen, Kurt. I know you need this. Believe me. I know. Sometimes when Wes is talking, all I can picture is various ways to render him mute. Dude, it's a giant madhouse in here. We hide behind our rules. We hide the fact that even though our vocals might be great, we lack any passion. Everyone always mocks Vocal Adrenaline for not having feeling, well, we may hide it slightly better, but our songs are so far gone, we've become adept at faking emotion.
“Our traditions hide the fact that most of our guys can barely feel anything. We can laugh and say that our order prevents us from sinking into chaos, but we know deep down we wont beat New Directions at Regionals. It's not even going to be a competition. New Directions should have won last year. I was there, so was Blaine. We were scoping out our competition for this year, and if it weren't for Vocal Adrenaline being judges favorites, you would have taken it no competition. Oral Intensity shouldn't have even stood a chance. New Directions has something that most Glee Clubs can't even hope for now a days: They have passion. So much passion, it almost hurts to watch.”
Kurt smiled at his roommate and drew him into a rough hug. Jeff shook a bit, and Kurt felt a wet spot form on the shoulder of his shirt. That one tear was all that Jeff could muster. His outburst said so much, gave confirmation that he was okay with Kurt's decision. They would miss each other so much, but that was something that they both accepted. Jeff knew that Kurt needed to leave, and Kurt knew that Jeff had no choice but to stay.
All they could do now is hope to never forget.

Tuesday

Kurt found himself sitting alone at the cafe. He'd eschewed any contact with Blaine the day before. Other than the classes they had together, he basically had avoided the other boy the entire day. There were only three days left of classes at Dalton. The conversation he had with Jeff the night before had brought to his mind that he really would be leaving. It seemed more real that this was the last week . Every passing moment brought with it a slew of feelings he didn't know how to deal with.
Happiness: He's be seing Finn, Rachel, Mercedes, and everyone else. Every day. He'd be singing. All the time.
Sadness: Jeff would be here. Blaine would be left behind.
Fear: Karofsky.
Anger: He'd wasted so much of his time here. Hiding. Falling in love with someone that couldn't love him back. Wishing his life away.
It all confirmed his need of leaving. Kurt sat at that table, the one he shared so often with Blaine. He drank his coffee, and he thought of the life in Lima he'd ran away from. He remembered how much he missed his family. His father had been living without him during the week, and he'd been neglecting coming home on the weekends. There was so much he'd missed because of Dalton. He'd forgotten about how much he'd left behind.
Now that he was going back, he hoped that they hadn't forgotten him.

Wednesday

Apparently two days was too long. Blaine found him at lunch on Wednesday. He sat across from him, next to Jeff. Jeff looked over at Blaine curiously before speaking.
“Well Kurt, I'll...uh...I'll let you two talk.”
With Jeff gone, Blaine stared at the younger boy, waiting for him to speak. When Kurt didn't oblige, Blaine seemed to diminish a bit, and when he spoke, it was with a softer tone that implied the fact that he was a bit afraid of the situation.
“I can't let you. I just can't. Kurt, It's changed so much since you've been here. Wes has been letting up a lot. The Warblers are becoming closer on an emotional level. You're the lynchpin. You're what's bringing us together this year. We wouldn't have even been able to make Hey, Soul Sister work if it weren't for you.”
Kurt opened his mouth to protest, but Blaine kept plowing through.
“I know you didn't have the solo, but that's not what matters. The energy you bring? That's what matters. You hold us together with something that I can't describe. Please, stay. It's going to be so different without you. Not in a good way, either. I'm so bad at this, I wish I could just...Ugh. Please! Kurt, for me?”
Kurt looked up at the distraught boy in front of him. Even his appearance was coming apart at the edges. Blaine hadn't applied enough gel that morning, and the corkscrew curls that were shooting from the sides of his head made Kurt feel a weird sense of pity. But it didn't change how he felt.
“Blaine. Listen to me, this is for me. I need this. Besides, the Warblers aren't enough reason for me to stay. I never grew attached to the group like I did New Directions. It's not a family here for me, Blaine. It's just not the same. I don't have any reason to stay.”
“Kurt, if not for the Warblers, stay for me. That's what I'm really trying to say. I...I don't want you to leave. I don't know what I'm going to do. It scares me how wonderful life is, now that you're in the world. I...I don't want to try to go to this school without you in it. Something has changed here. Something that I wont ever forget. Even if you leave. But...Please. Don't. For me.”
Kurt's eyes found the pleading depths of the older boy's eyes. There was so much sadness there. So much longing, so many of the emotions that Kurt wished would have been there a week ago. Even just days ago. Somewhere deep down, a part of the boy still loved Blaine. But Kurt needed out. He needed a different place. A place that didn't force him to be someone, no, something he wasn't.
“Blaine. I can't. I just can't. Dalton? It's one big prison for me. I'm in a cage of perfection and traditions. Tevye didn't even impose this many rules. It's just too much. I'm on an overload. There's so much that needs to change. So many people that just wont. I need out. Home is where the heart is, and it used to be here, with you.
“But now? Now home is far, far away. My heart is too. So please, just try to forget me.”