Sam jumped up out of the water, reaching to catch the football his dad threw at him over Stevie's head.   They had been at the lake since early this morning, lazing around on the beach and swimming in the warm water, and he couldn't remember the last time he had felt so relaxed.  He looked over towards where Stacie and her friends were climbing all over Blaine, eagerly taking him up on his offer to toss them over his shoulder into the water again and again.  Blaine looked happy too.  It was easier on his leg, he thought, floating around all day, and no one looked at him like the weird guy with the cane.  He knew Blaine was still self-conscious about his leg, despite the fact that he shouldn't be.  At least today was a change from all of that.

Stacie gave a particularly ear-blasting shriek and Sam decided it was time to save Blaine from the hoard of pre-teen girls that was gathered around him.  He splashed over to his dad and gave him the football.  “I think Blaine and I are going to take a break.”  Sam swam over to Blaine and dragged Stacie off his shoulders.  “Go torture Dad, we need some bro time.”

“Bro time?”  Blaine swirled his arm back and forth in the water, getting ready to splash Sam.

Sam tackled Blaine, pinning his arms to his body and spinning him around as he lost his balance.  “No more splashing.  You're as bad as Stacie.”  Blaine grinned and shook his head, his wet curls spraying Sam in the face.  “Dude, didn't those kids tire you out yet?”

“Yeah, but it was fun.”  Blaine smiled sunnily, tilting his head up at Sam.  Sam realized he was still pinning his arms.  Before he let go, he checked one more time. 

“You're not going to splash me, right?”  Sam really didn't like getting water in his eyes, and Blaine splashed hard.  Blaine shook his head, more calmly now.  “Want to swim out to the raft?”

They set out for the raft which was anchored about fifty yards away, Sam admiring Blaine's measured strokes.  Sam tried out his butterfly for a little bit, but he was out of practice, and he doubted it looked as good as he would have liked.  He had just pulled himself up on the sun warmed wood when he noticed Blaine floundering around a dozen feet away. 

Sam dove in and was next to Blaine in seconds, treading water.  “Blaine?  You okay?”

“Cramp,” Blaine choked out.  He was clutching at his leg and kept slipping under the water.

“Come here,” Sam said, trying to get him in a lifeguard hold.  Blaine flailed and nearly elbowed Sam in the face, but Sam persisted.  “Let me help, you'll drown us both.”

“Shit, it hurts,” Blaine spat out, curling almost into a ball as Sam finally got his arm around him and started kicking, Blaine's back against his chest.  It didn't take long for Sam to get them to the raft.  He turned Blaine so that he could grab on to the ladder, and waited with him as he panted and coughed, a hand resting on his back. 

After Blaine caught his breath, Sam pulled himself up onto the platform and reached down for Blaine, giving him a hand as he hopped up the ladder.  Blaine pushed himself to his feet and Sam quickly stood with him as he wobbled, letting Blaine hang on to his shoulders for support as he flexed his ankle, pressing the ball of his foot hard against the deck.  Finally the cramp seemed to subside, and Blaine sank back down, laying down on his back with a groan.

“Want me to rub it?”  Sam ignored Blaine's side eye and took Blaine's foot on to his lap, slowly massaging his calf.  Blaine grimaced at first, then took a slow breath and let it out, relaxing, his eyes closed.

“Feels good, Sam.  Thanks.”  After a few minutes Sam gently let go of Blaine's leg and lay down next to him. 

“You okay?”  Sam asked quietly.

“Yeah.  I wasn't going to drown, though.”

“I know.”

“But thanks for saving me.”  Blaine turned his head and opened an eye, squinting at Sam.

“Anytime, bro.”  Sam smiled and pushed a dripping curl out of Blaine's eyes.  The sun was strong, even though it was past dinner time, and it frankly felt awesome just to lie still as the water gently rocked them.  Blaine closed his eyes and seemed content to doze, like a cat in a sunny window.

It did something to Sam, seeing how far Blaine had come.  It had been a shock when he went back to Lima, excited about hanging out with Blaine again.  Sam had worn a silly “Happy 2014” hat when he went to visit Blaine at the rehab place, thinking that it would make Blaine laugh the way he always did at Sam's goofiness, and then they would talk about everything and nothing, and maybe watch a movie on his laptop.   But Blaine barely said two words to him, couldn't care less about the hat, and acted as if he didn't give a shit whether Sam was there or not.  Sam learned a little bit about depression over the next few weeks – he even read articles on the internet about how to help a friend deal with emotional trauma, and talked to his own therapist.  He wasn't sure if Blaine had situational depression or something more ongoing, but in the end, he just went with his gut. He didn't take it personally when Blaine was irritable or downright rude, and he just kept showing up.  It got easier when Blaine was released from rehab and could go home.  He thought it made Blaine more relaxed, although he wouldn't admit it.  Sam got into the habit of going over to Blaine's house every day or two after work or class.  He'd talk with Blaine's mom for a few minutes, and then head up to Blaine's room.  Sometimes Blaine didn't want to do anything, so Sam would just chill out at his desk, surfing the web and playing games, letting Blaine be.  Other days they'd watch a movie together, or just lie around on Blaine's bed reading comic books (Sam made sure to bring over new ones every once in a while).  One day Sam was running late, helping Burt out at the shop, when he got a text from Blaine asking where he was.  He was so surprised to hear from him, he nearly dropped his phone. 

Sam brought Marley with him one afternoon, having hinted about it a few days before.  Blaine hadn't exactly said that he wanted to see her, but he didn't say no, either, so Sam thought he'd risk it.  His plan worked, and Blaine smiled when he saw Marley, ducking her head as she approached him, as if afraid he was going to bite her.  She had brought along some sheet music of songs she was working on, and Sam watched from his spot at Blaine's desk while they talked, Marley demonstrating on Blaine's guitar how she had been teaching herself to play.  There was one song she played that day that found itself a permanent part of Blaine's repertoire after that – Today Has Been OK, by Emiliana Torrini.  It was sad, but sort of healing and hopeful, and Sam liked it.

After that day he and Blaine started to jam together once in a while, on two guitars, or Blaine on the piano, although that involved getting him downstairs, which could set off a bad mood.  But it felt good to sing again with Blaine, and Sam thought Blaine liked it too.  It wasn't all sunshine and lollipops, though.  When Captain America: The Winter Soldier came out, Sam was dying to go, but Blaine didn't want to.  He didn't like leaving the house in his wheelchair.  Sam pulled out all the stops, trying every argument he could think of, but Blaine refused.  Then the next day Sam got a text from Blaine, who was outside in the car with his mom.  “I hear there's a good movie playing tonight.  And someone's going to buy you all the popcorn you can eat.  Any chance you'd like to see it?”

Then it was springtime, and as the weather got warmer, everything seemed to get easier.  They realized they were both really going to be able to get out of Lima in the fall, and they started to plan for New York together.  Blaine was coming out of his shell, his desire to reconnect with his friends battling his self-consciousness and winning more often than not.  Sam came over one day to find Blaine playing video games with Trent, who was apparently home from college on spring break.  They talked about courses, and exams, and dorm food, and it started to seem like it was really going to happen.  Before he knew it Blaine's aunt was telling them about the apartment they could share rent-free, and Sam's parents were on board, taking him and Blaine to New York for a long weekend to get the lay of the land.  Blaine clearly still hated being trapped in the wheelchair, but he had gotten used to accepting help from Sam, and Sam didn't mind giving it. 

New York was better and worse than Sam had expected.  The whole place was loud, and crowded, and occasionally scary, even for Sam, who thought he had moved on from the trauma of the accident.  Between classes, his job, and Blaine's still constant physical therapy appointments, they were exhausted.  But being together sustained them, through Sam's nightmares and Blaine's pain and insecurities.  Sitting on the couch at the end of the day, or curled into bed for an afternoon nap, they could trust each other with it all, and it kept them going.

Sam opened his eyes as a kid grabbed on to the raft, took one look at Sam and Blaine – older, clearly with dibs on the spot – and let go, swimming away without a word.  He glanced over at Blaine, who was undisturbed by their visitor, clearly asleep.  His hair was drying, his curls springing back into shape.  Blaine's long lashes brushed his cheeks, which were tinged with pink from their day in the sun.  Not for the first time Sam felt overwhelmed by his feelings for his friend. 

He knew it wasn't sexual attraction.  It wasn't fair, he thought, that you needed a romantic connection with someone to be a couple, to be a family.  If Blaine was really his brother, he wouldn't have to worry about Blaine leaving him – they'd always have that tie.  If Sam were gay, they could be boyfriends, fiancés, get married, and be a family that way.  Have little blond or curly-haired kids of their own.  Instead they were just friends, keeping each other company until something better came along.  Sam mentally kicked himself for such an uncharitable thought; he knew they were more than that.  But exactly what, it was hard to pin down.

There had been a few times that Sam had thought about trying for something more with Blaine.  He didn't understand why the shape of a person's body affected whether he was sexually compatible with them or not.  One night last winter, during a snowstorm that shut down the city, he and Blaine had made a nest of blankets on the floor in front of their fireplace.  Blaine fell asleep with his head on his abandoned homework, lying on his stomach in front of the fire, the golden light flickering over his skin.  Sam lay there for a while just looking at him, and when Blaine stirred, the page of his notebook sticking to his cheek, Sam put a hand on his arm, feeling the strength of his bicep under his soft plaid shirt.  Blaine had gazed at Sam and blinked slowly, smiling.  “Sam,” he breathed out.  “Hi.”

“Do you think I should kiss you?”  Sam had asked, not bothering with any preamble.

“Has something changed about your sexuality that you'd like to tell me?”  Blaine had replied, unfazed, as if he and Sam had had this conversation before.  Which they sort of had, although not in so many words.

“No, I don't think so.”

“Then why?”

“Just to check?”

And just like that, Sam had his first (and to date only) kiss with another guy.  Blaine's lips were soft and warm, and they felt nice against his.  His face was just a little scratchy – Sam figured his probably was too.  Blaine hummed pleasantly into the kiss, and responded by sliding a little closer when Sam moved his hand to Blaine's cheek and then back into his hair.  They kept it up for a minute or two, pressing back and forth, Sam tentatively opening his mouth a little to let Blaine's tongue explore.  Finally Sam pulled back. He smiled at Blaine, a little embarrassed.

“So?  How'd I do?”  Blaine smiled at him.

“You're really good at that,” Sam said shyly.  “But…”

“You're not turned on,” Blaine said matter of factly.  “It's okay.”

“I wish I was,” Sam said sadly.  “We'd be an awesome couple.”

“For the record, I wish you were too.  But Sam?”

“Yeah?”

“We're still an awesome couple.”  Blaine held up his hand for Sam to high five.  “Blam!”

Sam blinked as he raised his head, looking out over the sparkling lake, smiling at the memory of his kiss with Blaine.  It had been a one-time thing, but the ease between them only continued to grow.  Maybe Blam would last anyway, even without being a real couple.  Sam was certainly going to do everything he could to keep his connection with Blaine, even if it had to be adjusted a bit to accommodate what was going on between Blaine and Kurt.  He could make it work.  He had to.

Sam poked Blaine.  The sun was getting lower, and he was a little chilly.  “Wake up.”

Blaine just mumbled and pushed back at Sam's arm.  “Wanna sleep.”

“There's fireworks tonight, dude.  Rise and shine.”

Hours later, after a picnic of brownies and strawberry shortcake in front of the town pavilion, a patriotic sing-along with the community band, a modest but entirely enjoyable fireworks display, and an argument with Stevie and Stacie over when they could be woken up the next morning, Sam and Blaine sat in Sam's backyard, contemplating their slightly lopsided tent.

“We don't have to sleep in it.  We can camp out on the living room floor like last night.”  Sam poked the side of the tent with his foot, testing its stability.

“I don't know, it's nice to be outside.”  Blaine watched Sam shake the tent, which stayed upright.  “I don't think it's going to fall down, Sam.  It's just a little off balance.”  Blaine looked sharply at Sam as he choked back a laugh.  “Don't you dare,” he warned.

“I'm sorry, B,” Sam began.  “But it's hard to resist when you say things like that.”  Sam pushed the tent flap aside and held out his hand in invitation for Blaine to crawl in.  “Besides, you're getting steadier all the time.”

Blaine smiled that little private smile that meant he was proud of himself.  Sam caught his eye, and smiled back.  They shuffled around, getting into their sleeping bags, and Sam put the camp lantern up behind their pillows.

“I remember that lantern.  You brought it to the sleepover Kitty had after the shooting at McKinley,” Blaine mused.  “You had bad nightmares then, too.”  Blaine turned towards him, his face open, letting Sam know he could talk about it if he wanted to.  Yesterday Sam had gone to see Betsy, his therapist, leaving Blaine back at the house to play around with Stacie and Stevie.  Luckily they were both easily occupied with anything musical, and all Blaine had to do was pull out a guitar to hold their attention.  By the time Sam got home, Stacie had learned some new chords, and Stevie was trying to talk his mom into getting him drum lessons.  Blaine hadn't pressed him about the session, just gave him a pat on the back and a warm smile when he returned.

Sam turned on his back, looking up at the tent.  There was something he had talked about with Betsy that he needed to say to Blaine.  “Do you think we're too dependent on each other?” he asked quietly. He couldn't see Blaine's face, but he felt his hand brush the back of his where it lay between them.

“No, I don't.” 

“But we're practically joined at the hip.”   

“It's good to be able to depend on each other.  Just because we depend on each other, that doesn't mean we're too dependent.  I think we're doing fine, Sam, as long as we're both happy with how things are.”

Sam just thought for a moment, trying to say this right.  “What if I'd like to be less dependent?” 

Sam thought he could feel Blaine tense beside him before he responded.  “In what way?” 

“Well, gee, I'd like to be able to be alone in the apartment without being afraid, and be able to put myself back to sleep after a nightmare.”

“Of course, Sam.”  Blaine raised himself up on an elbow and moved into Sam's line of sight.  “I want that for you too.  That's not what I meant.”  Blaine pushed on Sam's arm until he turned a little, returning his gaze.  “Did you talk to Betsy about it?”

“Yeah.  She thinks it's a good idea for me to see someone regularly in New York.  She's going to talk to the person NYU suggested and see if he seems like a good fit.” 

Sam watched as Blaine nodded.  “That's great.”  Blaine's brow twitched, and his eyes flicked away from Sam's.  “Do you think I'm too dependent on you?” he asked nervously.

“No, man, definitely not.”  Sam smiled and poked Blaine's foot gently with his toes.  “I know you don't even need me to be your personal slave anymore.  You just like having me around all the time because I'm awesome and I make you laugh.”

As if to prove the point, Blaine laughed, his eyes scrunching up.  “You are awesome, Sam Evans, and don't you forget it.”  Blaine lay back down next to Sam, his head tilted against Sam's shoulder.  He and Blaine lay quietly together for a few minutes, their hands bumping up against each other, close and content.

“You're sure Kurt's okay with this?”  Sam said softly, wishing immediately that he hadn't.

“Don't worry about Kurt, Sam.  He's been okay with it since our very first sleepover at Kitty's.”

Sam remembered talking to Kurt on the phone that night, more than two years ago, when Kurt encouraged him to basically snuggle Blaine to sleep if he needed it.  They had all been pretty shaken from the school shooting and no one was sleeping well, Sam included.

“Just promise me something, Blaine.”  Sam's voice came out sounding funny even to himself.

“What?”  Blaine sat up a little and looked at Sam, his eyes wide.  “What's wrong?”

“If you and I need to be a little less, you know, touchy, just say something.”

Blaine slid away from Sam, wrapping his arms around his chest.  “Do you want me to stop?”  He sounded hurt.

“No, don't be mad, that's not what I meant.”  Shit, this wasn't coming out right at all.  He just didn't want Kurt to be pissed at Blaine, and after all this time, he still didn't really understand why he and Blaine could cuddle together like they did.  “It's not just you, it's both of us, you know that.  I like it too.  I like to be close to you.  But's it not normal.”  Sam didn't think that's what he meant to say, but out it came anyway.  Out of the corner of his eye, he saw Blaine flinch.

“People express affection for each other in different ways, Sam,” Blaine said tightly.  “Plenty of girls are physical with each other, when they're just friends.  It's comforting.  You never minded before.”

“And I don't mind now,” Sam insisted.  “I'm just, I don't know, trying to stave off the inevitable.  You've got a real boyfriend now, I've got to learn to take care of myself.”

“Don't push me away because you're afraid I'm going to leave you, Sam.”  Once again, Blaine hit the nail on the head.  He could read Sam like a book, sometimes, and not just any book.  One that he'd read over and over, like the first Harry Potter.  “I've tried that, and it doesn't turn out well.”

“Okay,” Sam said, not sure it was worth fighting about anymore.

“Sounds like even a hearty ‘Blam' isn't going to make you feel better right now,” Blaine said softly.

“I'm sorry, Blaine.  Today was just such a good day.  And you have to admit, we aren't going to spend as much time together as we used to.  Just do the math – every date you go on with Kurt, that's time you're not with me.  And of course there's nothing wrong with that, it's great for you, it's healthy, it's horrible for me to even say this.  I just have to suck it up.”  And figure out how to get through the night without you, he thought. 

Blaine laced his arms around Sam and hugged him tight.  “It's not horrible.  You're going to be okay, Sam, I promise.  I'm not going to leave you, metaphorically or otherwise.”

“I may be in college now but I still don't understand what that means,” Sam muttered into Blaine's shoulder.

“It means you can depend on me until you don't need to as much anymore.  For starters, I'm not leaving you alone at night until you're ready, and I'm going to help you get there.”  Blaine released his hold on Sam and sighed, lying back down.  “Although it is awfully tiring, having to hang around with such an unattractive and boring guy all the time.”

“Take that back, or I'm going to quit being your personal trainer, and we'll see who's unattractive then,” Sam grumbled.

“What, are you saying the only attractive thing about me is my compact yet well defined musculature?”

“Again with the big words, Anderson.”  Sam slid closer to Blaine and ducked under his arm, resting his head on Blaine's chest and setting his hand gently on Blaine's waist, the position Blaine sometimes pulled him into after a particularly bad nightmare.  He held perfectly still for a moment, hoping Blaine wouldn't push him away.  He didn't. He never did.

After a few minutes Sam could feel Blaine's breathing slow down.  Just when Sam thought he was asleep, Blaine's hand found its way to Sam's arm and gave it a gentle squeeze.

“Love you, Sammy,” Blaine whispered.

“Love you too,” Sam replied.  Sam wondered if their love was worth the same as the love Blaine had for Kurt.  Maybe that wasn't the right question.  Love is love.