Chapter 7

Their next stop was planned for Albuquerque. They barely made any stops on the way, unwilling to get out onto the scorching heat outside and blessing the air-conditioning in the Navigator. Those travelling in the other car had to make do with their windows opened wide and gallons of bottled water.

Finally, after going eight hundred miles in a little over twelve hours, they arrived in the city completely exhausted. Everybody wished for nothing more than a shower, and for the first time since setting off from Lima, Puck wanted something more than he wanted food. (Kurt was pretty sure that once they arrive in Los Angeles, Noah would be also quite vocal about wishing to pick up girls.)

They stayed the night at a Motel 6 that was close to the interstate, and was surprisingly nice. As it turned out, though, there was only one room available with two single beds, and Finn, Rachel and Puck quickly decided they would have it, leaving the two pairs of friends with rooms with double beds.

Both Blaine and Kurt felt like it was a sign. Neither said anything to the other, but if they had, they would’ve known they were exactly on the same page.

It was an opportunity that a regular teenager would jump on. They were unsupervised, away from home, having to sleep in one bed in a motel room. They even had condoms at the ready. Neither could stop thinking about the other, their feelings overwhelming and dizzying.

But once they were in the room, Kurt found all his courage was fleeing him, leaving him standing awkwardly in the middle of the room and eyeing the large bed. Blaine, in turn, was watching Kurt, realizing how tense his friend had lately become when they were alone in the presence of a bed and a locked door. But it had never worried him as much before. Now it only seemed to him a glaring piece of evidence that Kurt wasn’t as comfortable with being touchy-feely as he used to be.

And that depressed him more than anything had in well over eighteen months.

Wanting to hide his sucky mood from Kurt, he told him he’d hit the shower first, and he rushed into the bathroom.

He let the water flow long before he finally slipped under its stream. He was too close to breaking down to risk Kurt hearing him, if he started sobbing. The efforts to hold himself back that he’d been making for the last months were taking their toll on him. Being worn out after two days of almost non-stop driving across the country added to his anxieties. As did the fact that he’d be seeing his older brother for the first time in two years in just a couple of days.

Fifteen minutes into standing in the shower almost completely motionlessly, he figured he wouldn’t feel any better. There was really no point in delaying Kurt’s skin care routine, so he made his way back into the room, his hair still dripping.

Kurt gathered his things as soon as he heard the bathroom door open, but stopped mid-step when he saw Blaine. Something was off about his eyes, his expression.

‘What’s wrong?,’ Kurt asked, quickly coming up to Blaine, who shook his head infinitesimally.

‘Nothing, I’m just- tired. And a little nervous about seeing Cooper.’

‘Oh.’ Kurt nodded, a mixture of sadness and understanding creeping onto his face. ‘I’d hug you, but I’m pretty gross right now, but I hear I’m a really good cuddler, so how about cuddles once I’m out of the bathroom?’

Regardless of his mood, Blaine’s heart sped up, and his lips tugged upwards. He could only wish that it meant he was wrong and Kurt was never averse to the physical contact between them.

Kurt couldn’t remember when was the last time he went so fast through all of his night time rituals. The thought of Blaine being upset and needing him was the only one present in his mind the whole twenty minutes he spent in the bathroom.

When he came back out, Blaine was standing by the window, lost in his thoughts and probably not seeing anything outside of the window. But he heard the creak of the door and turned around with a faint smile.

‘Cuddle time,’ Kurt announced a little awkwardly, heading straight for the bed.

Blaine mirrored his movements exactly and slipped under the sheets. They lay down facing each other, unable to stop staring for a minute, when they decided it had to be creepy and looked away at the same moment.

‘I wish I could offer some advice in the brother department, but I don’t really have much experience with having siblings, let alone estranged ones,’ Kurt said at last, his eyes wandering back to Blaine’s face.

‘It’s fine, I’m just a little- nervous.’ Blaine winced slightly.

‘I know you’re not close, but you never really told me why,’ Kurt said.

Blaine shifted onto his back with a sigh. It wasn’t a favourite subject of conversation of his.

‘He’s just this- golden boy, you know, talented, dark, tall and handsome, and he never fails to remind me about it. That I’m the lesser one.’ He tried to shrug it off, but Kurt couldn’t be fooled.

‘Sweetie, you are probably the most talented person I’ve ever met, and remember that I’m friends with Rachel Berry.’ Blaine couldn’t help himself but chuckle. ‘And maybe you’re not the tallest, but dark and handsome are two things you definitely are. There is literally no reason for you to feel worse than your brother.’

‘You think so?,’ Blaine asked weakly.

‘I know so.’ Kurt paused for a second. ‘Plus, I’ve seen his photos, he’s not that handsome. A little, maybe, but I’d choose his little brother any day.’

Blaine’s depression from earlier was dispersing faster than mist on a sunny morning.

‘Really?’ He turned to his side to be able to look at his friend.

‘Sure, honey.’ Kurt smiled at him. ‘You know you can always talk to me about all that, right?’

‘Yes. I love- I love that about our friendship.’

‘Me too.’

Kurt switched the light off and put an arm around Blaine, who melted into the touch. He’d almost slipped and told Kurt how he felt, but it didn’t matter.

He was just hoping there would be only double beds in their motel rooms from now on.

***

The next day was even longer as they were on their way since before seven, and just as tiring. The views they got to enjoy whenever they weren’t driving made the journey a little more bearable. The semi-deserts and mountains they passed through truly created a wonderful scenery, but with time, even that wasn’t interesting anymore, everything seeming repetitive and monotonous.

‘Now I just want to see the ocean,’ Kurt said six hours into the last stretch of their journey to Los Angeles. He had to make an effort to suppress a huge yawn.

Santana and Brittany had traded their seats with Finn and Rachel on their last pit stop, and now where comfortably settled in the backseat of the Navigator. Brittany was napping with her head propped on her friend’s shoulder, while Santana furtively intertwined their fingers out of the boys’ sight.

Blaine smiled at him from the driver’s seat; Kurt was so adorable when he was pouting.

‘You’ll see it tonight, don’t worry,’ Blaine assured him.

Santana rolled her eyes at the exchange. The boys were so obvious and so clueless it hurt her to watch.

‘Hey you, lovebirds, I’d say get a room, but you’re gonna get one anyway, so listen carefully to auntie Tana, okay?,’ she said, quietly enough not to wake Brittany. ‘Just do it already, ‘cause that foreplay is taking way too long, it’s unhealthy.’

Blaine was glad the road was relatively empty, or else it could’ve ended badly. The car swerved slightly, the surprise of her remark making him lose his grip on the wheel for just a second. Kurt didn’t even notice it, too busy trying to fight off the blush that was inevitably blooming on his face.

The question whether they were this easy to see through was haunting them both until they finally crossed Los Angeles city limits.

***

They found a motel in Santa Monica barely two blocks from the beach. Thanks to setting off early in the morning, the sun was only beginning to slide down to the horizon, when they got to load their baggage out of the trunks of their cars.

‘I wish we could go to the beach tonight,’ Kurt sighed, slamming the trunk of his SUV shut.

‘We can still go,’ Blaine said cautiously. There was nothing he wanted to do more that night than watch the sun set over the Pacific with Kurt by his side. ‘Right, guys?’

Everyone agreed to get a moment to put their stuff into their rooms and freshen up, and meet in the motel courtyard in twenty minutes.

Kurt and Blaine were the last ones to show up back to the courtyard, save for Puck, who disappeared from his, Finn and Rachel’s room ten minutes earlier with his guitar on his back and no explanation.

‘Maybe he thinks he’d get a chance for a threesome, if he plays that guitar on a street corner,’ Santana said, lazily studying her short, blood red fingernails. ‘With someone else than Frodo and Sam over here.’

It took another five minutes for Puck to show up, a paper shopping bag in his arms.

‘You went to get groceries?,’ Rachel asked with disbelief.

Noah sent her a mischievous grin.

‘I went to get booze and snacks.’

Everyone’s eyes bulged.

‘Wait, we were supposed not to get in trouble, you remember that, right?,’ Finn said.

‘Dude, we’re not gonna get in trouble. We’re just gonna make a bonfire, drink, and go skinny dipping.’

Kurt blinked at the words. ‘Please, tell me you were joking about the skinny dipping.’

Santana rolled her eyes, as Puck shook his head.

‘Okay, nevermind,’ Kurt sighed. ‘Let’s go.’

***

The ocean was beautiful.

For a long while Kurt could only stand transfixed in the middle of the beach, staring straight ahead at the last rays of the setting orange sun. The waves were gently flowing on the edge of the beach. It was so peaceful; apart from them, there were just a few other people left in sight, everyone else chased back home by the falling darkness.

Finn and Puck produced some dry sticks and driftwood apparently out of nowhere and took to making a fire. The girls spread some blankets they’d taken with them over the sand and sat down to admire the views.

The sound of soft footsteps on the sand made Kurt look away from the fading light over the water. He smiled at the sight of Blaine, who stopped right behind him and propped his chin on Kurt’s shoulder and wrapped his arms around his friend’s waist. Maybe it was too much, but it felt so right in that moment.

Kurt froze for a second, feeling the warmth that embraced him. It was strange to have Blaine do that, but he couldn’t say he didn’t like it. Hell, he loved it. So he relaxed with a sigh, putting his hands over Blaine’s on his own stomach.

‘It really is something, isn’t it?,’ Blaine whispered.

‘Yeah, it is.’

They didn’t talk any more. The moment was perfect just the way it was. Somehow their worries about letting the other see their true feelings faded away, letting them enjoy the way their bodies seemed to fit together as if they were pieces of the same jigsaw puzzle.

They would’ve kept staring at the ocean like that forever, if Santana didn’t make it clear the sight of them was nauseating by yelling at them from fifty feet away.

Letting go of each other had never been that hard for either of them before.