If I Knew Then
Eveimei
Chapter 1: Scars of Your Love Story
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Eveimei

Sept. 11, 2011, 10:25 p.m.


If I Knew Then: Chapter 1: Scars of Your Love


K - Words: 1,318 - Last Updated: Sep 11, 2011
Story: Closed - Chapters: 1/? - Created: Sep 11, 2011 - Updated: Sep 11, 2011
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Author's Notes: This is PG-13 ish for now. Un-beta'd, though I am on the lookout for one (or more)! Last paragraph is completely the work of the lovely Ozbrat, thanks so much lovely! Chapter title is from Rolling in the Deep by Adele.
Kurt loved singing. It was one of the few things he liked to do for himself, not for others. He was trying to become a singer with a record deal and everything, but it was hard. He often had to sing songs that he didn't like much but showcased his voice.
This concert, however, was all his.
It was a small thing, just a fundraiser for a school's show choir. He remembered the school's name from when he was in school- Carmel High- and while they had been his school's biggest competition, the school had cut their funding down to almost nothing. Kurt felt he needed to help out some show choir, since he had learned so much, and met some of the most amazing people ever while in Glee.
Kurt had already sung a few songs before taking a break and moving to an area outside near the grills and food tables that the glee club director had shown him, telling him he could sing there or just talk to people. As Kurt walked under the awning that was set up, he saw a few raindrops hit the ground. The wind picked up from the slight breeze there had been, and the brunette was suddenly glad for the long cardigan and jeans he had chosen over thin stretch pants and a tee.
The rain brought a song to mind, and he smiled as he softly began to sing, his voice barely carrying over the chatter of people trying to get out of the weather.
And suddenly, a very wet someone barreled into Kurt. The singer swore and shoved them away, pausing when his hand encountered curly hair, memories trying to fight their way past mental walls. Kurt's first instinct was to hiss at the smell of wet hair and clothes the male was giving off. Instead, he curled his lip in disgust and stepped away. The slightly shorter person who had crashed into Kurt shook, water spraying everywhere, but mostly on Kurt.
"Can't you shake in another direction? And you might want to watch where you're going." His voice was cutting, his dislike of water touching his hair and annoyance at being interrupted becoming apparent. Kurt crossed his arms, barely resisting the urge to tap his foot.
"Oh, sorry. Didn't quite realize there was anyone here." Why was his voice so familiar? Kurt frowned, pursing his lips.
"Didn't realize that you bumped into me, and that i pushed you away?" After a pause in which the stranger looked like a kicked puppy stared at the ground, Kurt held out a hand. "Kurt Hummel."
"I know who you are, don't you remember me? I recognized your voice as soon as you sniped at me." Kurt looked at the other male more carefully, before raising a hand to his mouth and softly saying:
"Blaine. Blaine Anderson. Oh my goodness I'm so sorry I yelled at you. And that I was so rude god I can be so stu-" Blaine stepped forward, shaking his head.
"It's fine, Kurt. I wouldn't expect you to remember me, after all that happened." Blaine's expression was a bit sad, but amusement was the strongest thing visible. Kurt swallowed down the memories, but not before flashes of hurried kisses, drawn out make-out sessions, fumbled attempts at more, and disapproving parents passed through his mind.
"I'm still sorry. Here, why don't we go inside? It'll be warm and less wet, and I'm sure we can find some coffee. For old time's sake?" Kurt turned to face the door to the building, glancing back and hesitating before offering Blaine his hand. Blaine smiled and took it before rushing them through the rain and inside.


"So, Kurt, what've you been up to these years after high school?" Blaine carefully poured a little bit of creamer and sugar into his coffee, eyes resolutely fixed on his hands.
"Well, for the first year or so I just worked in my dad's garage and did other odd jobs, looked at colleges and careers. After a while I decided to try to become a singer, and if that fails I'll do something in education. Then I started going to Ohio state for acting and singing classes." Kurt sipped at his drink, head tilted slightly as he watched Blaine taste his own coffee.
"Not fashion? I think everyone expected you to go into that industry." Blaine finally looked up, raising an eyebrow.
"It lost the appeal it had when I stopped letting myself ignore the horrible policies and practices. I've always loved to sing, and if an openly gay man can make a living in one of the hardest industries then more people will try for their dreams. At least, that's part of the speech I've had written for a while." Kurt played with the beaded bracelet he wore, eyes drifting around the gymnasium. He saw the school's glee club director standing by the sound equipment, shouting and waving his arms at a technician as the club waited by the stage.
"Of course you have a speech written." Blaine's tone was not teasing, but rather soft, reminding Kurt of all the times they had discussed their futures and came up with acceptance speeches for various awards they expected to receive.
"Well, yeah, one must always be prepared for any event. Isn't that what you told me?" Kurt grinned, then turned towards the stage when the first few beats of "Teenage Dream" started and the glee club launched into their performance with all the energy and drive New Directions used to have. Blaine was laughing, but Kurt was caught up in the song and memories.


After the club had run through their songs, Kurt turned to Blaine. "And what has the illustrious Blaine Anderson done with his time after graduating?" His tone was teasing, a small smirk on his lips.
Blaine's face darkened, and he looked away from Kurt. "My father disowned me. I've been scraping by, playing guitar and singing at bars and stuff. Crashing at friend's places when i don't have the money for a motel room."
Stifling a gasp, Kurt though furiously. "Oh. Why did he disown you, if you don't mine me asking?"
"I refused to marry a girl he had picked out for me. Dated and got engaged to a guy instead. My father got mad, disowned me and started threatening our lives. I broke off the engagement and ran out of Ohio. Spent some time in Chicago before coming back to Ohio." Blaine's voice was flat, unemotional. He finished off his coffee and crushed the cup in his hands.
"Do you have a place to stay right now? Because I have a spare bedroom and my condo always feels too empty."
"Kurt, you don't have to do any-"
"Blaine, you were my first boyfriend, and I still consider you a best friend. Plus, this way I have someone to bounce song lyrics off of. And you can play guitar for my album or something for payment." Kurt gave Blaine his patent bitch face, and Blaine thought for a moment before sighing and nodding.
"Fine. As long as you have a decent coffee maker." The subject of coffee makers had always been a bit of a joke between them, since many of the important moments in their relationship happened in coffee shops.
"Would I not?" Kurt smiled, then glanced around again. "If you're okay with it, we can go home. I do need to finish writing a couple songs today."
"Sure. You don't need to tell anyone you're leaving?" Blaine shifted, still looking a bit melancholy.
"Oh, right. Hey St James! I'm off." Kurt yelled across the room to the glee director, then turned back to Blaine. "Let's go."
Taking a hold of the hand Kurt offered him, Blaine nodded and allowed himself to be led out of the school. Stepping in to Kurt’s old familiar car from high school and with a comfortable silence between them, Blaine quietly sat in thought as Kurt pulled away from the curb. Remembering their past, comtemplating the future, soaking in the present.


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