Blaine kept Kurt’s hand, he had to, it was like breathing, he had no choice. He slipped through the crowd, his heart feeling heavier and heavier with each step. The only thing that kept him going was knowing that he had tonight alone with Kurt and the memory of his lips and arms to keep him warm. Blaine hailed another cab and swayed a little on his feet. When had he gotten drunk? He wasn’t clear on that he was only clear on the fact that going to the club had not relieved the tension growing between him and Kurt, but only upped the ante so to speak. When Blaine slid in to the cab he did not fight the need to pull Kurt in close. He didn’t speak and he didn’t try anything further, but he had to keep that contact, maintain that illusion that they were sharing something bigger than the both of them. As long as Kurt didn’t hate him for it he was going to keep that contact up the rest of this night. Tomorrow they could worry about all the implications, all the fallout. What he really wanted was to lean over and kiss Kurt like that just once more while he felt they could still possibly get away with it.

Kurt climbed into the cab, the whole scenario feeling all too familiar, but this time, even more intense. Regardless of if he should or not, once in the cab, Kurt cuddled up to Blaine’s chest, pulling at his arms until they wrapped around his middle. He was already feeling slightly woozy from the alcohol he had drank. Kurt was light, and his alcohol tolerance low, so he was easily all ready a mess. He closed his eyes and tried to ground his racing head, focusing only on the beating of Blaine’s heart. He sighed, a small smile on his lips at their closeness. In the cab however, his mind flicked to the cell phone he had thrown out and more importantly, to Sam. Every logical part of him was screaming bloody murder at him to move to get off Blaine to stop where this was obviously heading. But nothing could make him move from the spot. It felt too damn right. Once the cab arrived at his apartment, Kurt paid the fee, realizing he was too anxious to be around Blaine to realize Blaine, the person whom had just got evicted, had paid the last cab fee. He groaned, telling himself he needed to be a better friend to Blaine. He struggled to climb out of the cab and finally, still holding close to Blaine, made their way upstairs back to their home. Their home….

By the time they were back at the apartment and on the elevator up, Blaine was holding onto Kurt for bodily support as much as anything else. That was the liquor catching up to him, he realized. He was supposed to be behaving now, he really wanted to, but instead he just kept smelling Kurt’s cologne, or squeezing Kurt’s hand. It was all very confusing now. At the same time it lacked the urgency from before. Now it just felt nice to give in. The line was there, they were safe to cuddle now, right? Blaine headed straight for the couch when they got in the door and he sat down heavily looking up at Kurt. “It’s so quiet here now.” Was all he could think to say which was much better than get over here and kiss me, so Blaine figured that despite being intoxicated he was still ahead of the game. “Kurt.” He whispered, but this was mainly to himself.

Kurt struggled up the flights of stairs. They should have took the damn elevator, but that caused too much….tension last time and he didn’t know how he felt about increasing the possibility of making out so intensely with Blaine again….Hell, what was he saying? He actually really wanted that; more than anything. Sam! he reminded himself, he had Sam. He couldn’t want that. He mindlessly paced the room, unaware that he was doing so. He kept his eyes down, looking at the well worn carpet he was pacing. It was a common thing, many a nights Kurt had spent pacing this carpet. He crossed his arms over his chest, unintentionally keeping his distance from Blaine as the guilt consumed him. All the pacing and the throbbing from the alcohol was not a good match, so when Blaine finally called out for him, he reached for Blaine, taking his hands before he stumbled his way to the couch, resting his head into his lap, unable to hold his own head up anymore. “Blaine….” he responded, just as quietly. He closed his eyes, just enjoying the moment of lying on his lap. His it’s so quiet in here comment was still running through his mind, and suddenly, lyrics started to form. “Will you dance with me?” He asked, opening his eyes and looking up at Blaine. He sat up slowly, holding his head as he removed it from Blaine’s lap. “I…I have a song I want to play for you.”

Blaine pulled Kurt down into his lap with a sigh. This was such a mess. He hated to think he was messing around in Kurt’s life to the point that Kurt might not be so sweet and forgiving in the morning. They’d only ever had two real fights during their entire friendship and one of them had been over Sam before. He hoped Kurt wouldn’t misconstrue what had happened as having anything to do with Sam on Blaine’s part. Once Kurt had made it clear that Sam was the one, Blaine had been careful, mostly careful to respect the fact. But now they had shared something, something they had not shared since they were teenagers, and Blaine knew the game was much different now as adults. When Kurt offered a dance and a song, Blaine could only agree softly. “I’d love to hear it.” He whispered.

Kurt stood up, directing all his chaotic thoughts into that effort, gently pulling Blaine up with him. “Hold on one second,” he whispered, nervously squeezing his hand, before stumbling off into his room to grab a CD. It was a shiny mix tape, a plain CD with only the words To Blaine on it. Kurt tried to keep it flipped over so the labeled side didn’t show. Finally, he popped the CD into the CD player and went to track three. Iris began to play; the simple guitar strumming filled the room. He gave a light smile and stepped towards Blaine. “May I have this dance?” He asked, nervously, forcing himself to look into Blaine’s beautiful hazel eyes. He slowly took Blaine’s hand, placing one in his right hand, and one on his waist. The two began to sway in time to the music. Kurt gently sang along so Blaine could hear the words.

Do you remember the first kiss?
Stars shooting across the sky
To come to such a place as this
You never left my mind

Blaine stepped into Kurt’s arms and as the music began his heart seemed to skip a crazy beat. P.J. Harvey? Blaine knew the song and the lyrics well, but hearing them come out of Kurt’s mouth was a heady experience. Blaine was looking into Kurt;s deeply blue eyes and feeling the warmth of his back beneath his shirt. It was a little overwhelming. Was Kurt….could he be trying to say what it seemed he was trying to say? Blaine joined in because how could he not?

I'm watching from the wall
As in the streets we fight
This world all gone to war
All I need is you tonight

And I draw a line
To your heart today
'To your heart from mine
A line to keep us safe'

All through the rising sun
All through the circling years
You were the only one
Who could have brought me here

He sang softly but mainly he just listened to Kurt sing, Kurt’s voice had always had a special affect on Blaine and tonight was the same way. Blaine felt like these were his words to Kurt though. Could Kurt be feeling the same way? The music swirled around him and what he felt was so different than what he had felt at the club. This excitement was something else altogether.

And I draw a line
To your heart today
'To your heart from mine
A line to keep us safe'

Kurt had his head nestled into Blaine’s neck comfortably situated as they swayed back and forth to the music. He sang quietly into Blaine’s ear, trying to send the emotions he was feeling out through every word. The emotions, the words of the song, everything came rushing towards him and he stopped suddenly, carefully lowering the song volume as he lifted his head and looked into Blaine’s eyes. “I…” he started, everything inside him, all the words he had planned out to say turned to mush the moment his eyes locked with Blaine’s. It was an automatic response, one that had happened so many times. There were so many nights when Kurt would have wanted to study, but Blaine would want to go do something fun. One look from his eyes, and Kurt had thrown his textbooks out the window. Today, in this moment, as cautious as he logically knew he had to be about what he was about to say, looking into Blaine’s eyes, it was hard to speak from anywhere that wasn’t the heart. “I want you to…to need me. I want…” he said slowly. He sighed and shook his head. No, that wasn’t what he wanted to say either. Why was this so hard? “This isn’t….this isn’t like how it usual is..” he tried again.

Blaine’s feet had actually stopped moving and his arms circled Kurt in a careful way as though this moment were somehow more intense than what they’d shared earlier and he didn’t want to ruin it. Kurt had always been his to touch or hold or kiss if he had needed it, or wanted it; if he was bored or drunk or lonely. Blaine had offered the same to Kurt often enough in return and though it wasn’t all he could have wanted it was good and special. It was unlike anything he shared with anyone else. Others had his body when they wanted it. They had a tumble in the sheets or in the back of a car, but they never had his affection. They never had his love the way Kurt did. And now, with this song playing around them and Kurt singing softly in his ear, Blaine was thinking that while he had always wanted more, Kurt had too, and maybe circumstances had thwarted Kurt’s plans as well. When he pulled back and began to speak Blaine felt literally choked on everything he was feeling. He wanted to whisper at Kurt, ‘Say it. Please say it.’ Instead he said, “It isn’t the same for me either, Kurt. It hasn’t been all night.” He still needed Kurt to be the one to take the final step, after all Kurt was the one with the boyfriend.

Kurt leaned into Blaine, hiding his face into his chest. He inhaled quietly, taking in his scent, the familiar, comforting smell of Blaine. Kurt’s hands were clammy, and he clasped them together behind Blaine’s back, hoping the other man wouldn’t see how nervous he was. His heart pounded in his ears, making it difficult to formulate the proper words. This was it, Kurt thought to himself. This would be the moment he finally told Blaine how he felt, how he had always felt. Kurt loved Sam, he loved his geeky obsessions and little manners about him, but Kurt wasn’t in love with Sam. No one touched the spot Blaine had in his heart, had always had, and always would. “I…” he started, speaking finally. His voice sounded foreign to him, he felt like he was in a dream. He kept his face hide in Blaine’s chest, his voice muffled. “I’m in love with you. I always have been…” The moment the words left his lips, a thousand pound weight felt like it had lifted from his shoulders. “Please say you love me back?”

Blaine ran his hands up and down Kurt’s back, softly and slowly for support. He leaned his head against Kurt and just held on, waiting for Kurt to speak again. Over the years Blaine had thought they had made it to this point more than once. Kurt would go all serious on him and end up telling him things like how much he secretly loved some country son, or how he had tried to make his own secret sauce and ended up giving Sam food poisoning; never had it ever been that he wanted Blaine and only Blaine. Blaine had often teased Kurt that he was a bit of a drama queen, but he just knew this time would be the time. Knowing it and hearing it were entirely different things though because until Kurt said he loved him he could still back out. “You can tell me.” Blaine added trying to sound encouraging. Then, Kurt began again, softly, mumbling against Blaine. Then he said the words, the one that Blaine had wanted to hear for so very long. It didn’t even matter to Blaine that there were still obstacles, Kurt loved him! He pulled Kurt bac a tiny bit so he could look him right in his big blue eyes and he said, “I’m in love with you Kurt, and I have been for years. I want to be with you and I want you to need me every bit as much as I need you,” He finished with a light kiss for emphasis.

Kurt could feel the electric tingle run its course fully through his veins again. It was the lightness of finally having said those words; those emotions and connections to Blaine that had been building up for years. The thought of finally letting them out, letting them surface in Kurt’s conscious and to happen scared the hell out of him. He had no idea what he would be met with if he jumped, hell, ran right through, that line drawn between them. But the moment Blaine gently lifted his chin, forcing Kurt to gain courage after what he had said, he knew. He knew Blaine felt the same way. He didn’t even need to say it, mind you, it was nice to hear. In fact, it was more than nice to hear. It made his heart do crazy flips and his hands shake again. He took Blaine’s hands and squeezed them, trying to calm the tidal waves of thoughts racing through his brain. Blaine was that one clear spot, and he focused all his energy on to it. “Thank God,” he whispered finally, letting out a quiet sigh, and slightly collapsing into Blaine’s warm, strong arms. The moment the contact with Blaine was made everything became clear. He knew tomorrow morning, he’d have to deal with the hangover, the consequences, the difficulties, and most of all…the boyfriend, but now, he was in Blaine’s arms, where he belonged.

It felt like so many years of pressure and weight were suddenly gone and Blaine was high on the feeling. Of course they’d not made any promises or plans yet, but then they had made their declarations and that was good enough for tonight. Blaine held on to Kurt as he collapsed against Blaine and suddenly Blaine could feel the exhaustion take up in the place of the stress. He was drunk, he was tired, and he was finally at peace with Kurt after all these years. There was no line now between them and it felt great. He just wanted o climb in bed now and hold on to Kurt and never have to let go again. “Are you as sleepy as I am love?” He asked while stroking his hand through Kurt’s soft hair. “We can continue all of this in the morning.” He suggested softly. Kissing would also be alright with Blaine but he felt maybe they had both had almost all they could handle for one night.

Kurt yawned, his nose crinkled as he did, his eyes squinting closed. Once he opened them tiredly, he nodded, and rested his head against Blaine’s shoulder. He sighed, content with where he was; content with what they had, and more importantly, what they could be. “Can we…” he started, whispering into Blaine’s ear, still holding his hand, not wanting to let go, not wanting to ever fall back to his side of the line again. “Can we sleep in the same bed?” He whispered, his check blushing a bit at the statement. Tonight had been…intense for both of them. Between the cab ride and the club especially, Kurt understood how his comment could have been taken sexually, but quite honestly, Kurt was just terrified of losing contact with Blaine for too long. He bit his lip, frustrated at how attached he felt to Blaine already. He chalked it up to the newness of their situation and to the alcohol in his system. “I just,” he said nervously, hiding his face again, terrified of sounding venerable, “I just don’t want to be without you tonight….” he said finally.