Feb. 23, 2013, 4:37 a.m.
Call It Anything But Love
Call It Anything But Love: Ch. 8: Fight Me
E - Words: 5,267 - Last Updated: Feb 23, 2013 Story: Closed - Chapters: 17/? - Created: Jan 12, 2012 - Updated: Feb 23, 2013 579 0 0 0 0
He was threatening to hit Kurt. Blaine was going to hit him. Kurt pressed his lips harder together but it wasn’t going to work. Kurt was going to lose it and laugh in Blaine’s face, s instead of showing that weakness, he reached forward and pulled Blaine into his room by his cardigan and slammed the door shut behind them. Then he threw himself at Blaine, kissing him hard on the mouth, pressing him into the door, holding him with the entire length of his body.
Oh yes, this was exactly what he’d been craving all day. Everything was Blaine, the taste of Blaine, the smell of Blaine, and everything burned white hot just as it had the first time. Kurt raised a hand to tangle in Blaine’s hair and he pulled Blaine’s head back a bit so he could trail his tongue away from Blaine’s mouth and down his neck where he sucked hard and relentlessly in the space between Blaine’s neck and shoulder.
He’d meant to do this of course; this was the plan all along. Kiss Blaine senseless and make him agreeable. Kurt had never considered what such a thing would do to him though. He wasn’t prepared to lose himself so completely, falling under Blaine’s spell so much so that he forgot what he was supposed to be doing and simply worshiped Blaine’s neck and jaw with his mouth while his other hand fumbles with Blaine’s jeans.
Blaine bit back a yelp when he was pulled bodily into Kurt’s room, but didn’t succeed in hiding a moan that betrayed him when Kurt pressed him up against the door and kissed him hard. His body reacted first, pushing back into the kiss and opening his mouth so his tongue could meet Kurt’s. He felt the way Kurt’s arousal pushed into his hip and groaned from deep in his chest as passion whirled around his mind, trying to silence the fact that his brain was slowly dying from the lack of logic in the situation.
It only worked for a moment, though, and then Blaine was trying to push Kurt away from him. His body hated his mind, hated that he had to push Kurt away from his neck because he wanted to know why that could feel so good, because his mind hated that Kurt managed to make him feel like this, to forget that he was mad. “What are you doing, Kurt?!” Blaine shouted, his voice thick as he shoved his arms in between the two of them and pushed, trying to gain some separation from the assault on his senses. His glasses had fogged at the bottom and Blaine pulled them off and rubbed them against his thigh before shoving them back on. “Get off of me!”
The anger was back, and Before Blaine could think about what he was doing, his right hand reached up, forming a fist, and Blaine closed his eyes as he felt his knuckles make a connection with Kurt’s cheek. It wasn’t a particularly strong punch: Blaine had never learned how to do it properly, but he hoped that it at least served to show Kurt that he wasn’t playing around. “You don’t get to just do this to me!” Blaine was shouting, eyes wide and furious. “You can’t tell me to leave and then pull me back like this. You don’t get to do that, especially not without an explanation!”
Blaine held his hands out, trying to create a personal space bubble so that he could think. His breath came in short pants and he realized belatedly that he was hard. “Now, unless you explain to me what in the world this, this lunch and now thing is, I’m leaving.” His voice was calmer, quieter, as if Blaine had resigned himself to the fact that Kurt was just going to dodge the question and try to get him to stop talking and kiss him. The only problem, though, was that when Blaine thought about the heat, the way that he was reckless in the way Kurt had touched him when he’d been pushed against the door…it was hot.
Kurt was slow to react to Blaine’s escape attempts. His brain had gone cloudy filled with wantneedmorenow rolling through his mind on repeat. Eventually he caught on as Blaine was shoving against him and creating space between their bodies, space that helped Kurt remember to breathe. Actually it was then that he finally realized things were not gong according to plan. He had meant for Blaine to melt, to submit to him, to give them both what they wanted, what they needed. He may have been an arrogant prick but he knew Blaine wanted him just as badly; he was as hard as Kurt was.
There wasn’t a whole lot of time to gather his wits about him though because Blaine was yelling and then it happened. Blaine hit him. The little shit actually hit him! It wasn’t the hardest hit Kurt had ever taken but it stunned him and made him stumble back in an effort to stay upright. Blaine was yelling again, Kurt got the gist of it but really all he could process was the outrage that was rolling through his body, burning his blood, and making him completely reevaluate the situation. Blaine was not funny. Not even a little. Kurt was seeing red.
Blaine was threatening to leave, his hands still held out in front of him like he could stop Kurt if Kurt had a mind to invade that space again. Kurt could feel his own hands clenching painfully into tight fists at his side. His throat felt thick with anger but somehow he managed to move, and to speak. Kurt closed the distance between them slowly, his eyes never leaving Blaine’s. When he reached Blaine’s hands he sidestepped Blaine quickly and turned the lock behind him.
That done he moved back in front of Blaine, right up against his hands. “This, between us, was just supposed to be fun.” He said it through nearly clenched, his voice low and gravelly. “If, on the other hand you prefer violence, I’m sure that can be arranged as well.” Then he forced himself forward, past Blaine’s hands. Kurt was pressing against him all the way, his lips right on Blaine’s ear as he whispered furiously. “Either way, don’t act like you don’t want everything I have to give.” With that Kurt reached down and cupped Blaine’s dick.
As Kurt approached, Blaine felt real fear start to seep into his blood. He had no idea why he’d punched Kurt. It was instinct of the basest kind. He’d simply wanted Kurt to back off so that he could be mad and not have to worry about forgetting everything in Kurt’s mouth. He almost apologized when he heard the click of the door lock, and his body shuddered. This wasn’t supposed to happen. He was supposed to be the one who was mad, with a reason. Blaine wasn’t supposed to be scared and wondering what exactly what was going to happen to him. He was supposed to have the upper hand here. He was in the right.
“Fun?” he whispered, dropping his hands down by his sides as incredulity crept into his voice. “You’re threatening me with violence and this is supposed to be fun?” Blaine tried to ignore the hand that was touching him, the one that was making it distinctly more difficult to focus on anything else. This wasn’t supposed to be what sex was like. Sex was supposed to be sweet and happy and loving and this was nothing of the sort. This was needy and harsh.
“I want to know why you insist on making me feel like sh—like crap and telling me to go. I want to know where you get off telling me that I want this. I want to know what you think you’re doing, telling me that this is just supposed to be fun when the day before this I’d never even been kissed. I want to know why you want this to just be fun when I’ve never had a boyfriend and now that I feel something, anything, that’s when you want to make sure that it’s just fun?” Blaine took a deep, shuddering breath. His voice never rose above a slow whisper, and he closed his eyes and dropped his head back against the door.
When Blaine opened his eyes again, his eyes were confused, dancing with anger and want and desire and disgust and fear. “I want to know why I feel like I should hate you.” His hips shifted forward into Kurt’s hand. His voice was wrecked. “I want to know why I want you instead.”
Kurt kept his hand moving, he kept his lips at Blaine’s ear. He never once backed off, but he did listen. He didn’t want to. He resisted the words even as the tumbled from Blaine’s lips; especially the part about never having been kissed. Kurt knew of course, he just hadn’t allowed himself to think about it. He hated the pang of guilt he felt, he hated the memories that nagged the back of his mind and threatened to surface reminding him of his own first kiss. Too close too many similarities. He shoved all of it back down, but even as he did so he found himself pressing soft kisses to the shell of Blaine’s ear, to his neck, to his jaw.
Kurt didn’t want to hear any of this; he couldn’t admit any wrong here. Blaine had started all of this hadn’t he? And hadn’t Kurt deigned to be nice to him, to make him feel good instead of bad? Why did it have to be about answers and promises between them when it was so obviously about desire? There was never any rhyme or reason to getting off. Kurt had learned this the hard way, and now he was going to have to show Blaine, one way or another, and then Blaine surprised him. He was confused about wanting Kurt and was admitting it.
Kurt slid his hand up Blaine’s front until it rested on his chest, and then he ran his mouth up to meet Blaine’s. Instead of kissing him again he just spoke very softly. “I don’t have all the answers Blaine, I wish I did.” He pressed his forehead to Blaine’s but he couldn’t look him in the eye. “You drive me crazy.” Kurt hadn’t meant to say that. “Hate me.” He whispered.
Then he slid his hand back down and this time he dipped down below Blaine’s waistband, his fingers tugging lightly on the band of Blaine’s underwear. “Yell at me.” He kissed Blaine softly. “Fight me.” His voice was so light now. His fingers plunged down until he was running them along Blaine’s cock and it was almost more than he could stand. Blaine was so hot against his fingers. So hot against his lips. He wanted everything and he wanted it now and no matter what Blaine was struggling with Kurt knew he was right there wanting it all too.
Blaine tried to hate Kurt. He tried. He tried to find it somewhere in his heart to push Kurt away, to hit him and yell at him and make him feel even worse than Blaine had in the cafeteria, when he’d been pushed in the shower, when he thought that Kurt was just using him. He wanted to be able to do all of that and more, but the only thing on his mind was the way that Kurt’s hand was so warm, and this felt worlds different than his own hand. Yes, he was still mad, and he was definitely still hurt, wanted to talk about the fact that Blaine needed commitment, something else, but he also needed this, much more of this.
He keened, the sound high pitched and needy as his hips pushed forward into Kurt’s hand. He kissed Kurt back, his own hands rising up to tangle in Kurt’s hair and leaving the other one to hold fast onto his hip. And that’s when Blaine bit at Kurt’s lower lip. It was definitely harder than a nip, but it wasn’t hard enough to draw blood. He pulled softly on Kurt’s hair and kissed him once more, then bit him again. And then he pulled back from the kiss, frustrated and turned on and completely and utterly unable to think straight.
Yell at me. Fight me. Blaine wanted to. He wanted to so badly, but he could barely open his mouth to tell that to Kurt. Instead, he gave a strangled half-cry and pushed Kurt, forcing separation between them again. His eyes were dark and his breath was coming in long, deliberate pulls. He stared at the floor for a few seconds, and then looked up. “Oh, my God. I want you so bad.” When he realized what he’d said, Blaine gasped and brought his hand up to his mouth, waiting for the embarrassment to come. When it didn’t, Blaine’s tongue darted out to wet his lips, and then he closed the distance between him and Kurt. For once, apologizing for not being able to make up his mind was the last thing he was thinking. Instead, Blaine closed his eyes and pressed his lips to Kurt’s hard.
The kiss screamed anger and hurt and confusion, but there was also need, and even emotion that weren’t even closely linked to hatred somewhere even behind that. Blaine whimpered and opened his mouth for Kurt. I want him. I want him. I want him. The thought was scary and overwhelming and Blaine didn’t want to think about anything else. “I want you,” he whispered into the kiss, voice broken and needing as he struggled to try to find the right way to articulate it. “Please.”
Blaine made a noise. Just a soft noise, but it went straight to Kurt’s cock. Then Blaine was kissing him back and it was so perfect. Blaine’s finger in his hair, Blaine’s hips thrusting forward. So good. So right. Kurt held tight to Blaine’s hips trying to keep the both steady as the world rocked around them. Right in the middle of all of this overly heightened sensation, Blaine bit him. His lip. It wasn’t too hard, in fact it was just about right for Kurt’s mood, but then it happened again. Kurt felt a strangled sort of cry leave his lips but then Blaine was pulling back.
Immediately Kurt felt the loss. He met Blaine’s eyes which were wide and hungry. He thought maybe that’s what he would look like to Blaine just now. Blaine’s mouth looked practically bruised and he wanted to be kissing it again and then Blaine said it. He said he wanted Kurt and they were kissing again. This time Kurt held nothing back, and neither did Blaine. Kurt crushed Blaine in his arms, his tongue lashing against Blaine’s, hips grinding, hands sliding. Soon Kurt’s hands found what they were searching for and he grabbed two handfuls of Blaine’s ass just as Blaine said please.
It was like throwing gas on an open flame. Kurt felt the backs of his knees hit the edge of the bed and he pulled Blaine down on top of him. His hands pulled and pushed just so until Blaine was straddling his waist and he was raising his hips to Blaine’s almost frantically. His body knew what he needed and it intended to get it, but it wasn’t really what Kurt wanted. Not this time. He flipped them over, pinning Blaine down into the mattress, never once breaking the contact of their mouths and then grabbed Blaine’s wrists and pinned them over his head.
“Don’t move.” He whispered his voice dusky with desire. He needed Blaine still; he needed to feel some sort of control in a situation that was so far out of control that it was shocking to him. Then he released Blaine’s wrists and began trailing his hands over Blaine’s body until they came to rest on the buttons of his shirt. He meant to unbutton them, he really did, but after the first button, he ripped the second one and just gave in and tore the shirt open revealing Blaine’s toned torso. Immediately Kurt dove down and began licking paths across Blaine’s chest and stomach as though the honey colored skin was everything he’d every needed.
Everything was a mess and a tangle of limbs and tongues and sounds when Blaine felt himself being pulled. He panicked for a moment before recognizing that he was on the bed, on top of Kurt. He pushed his hips downward, earning a grunt from Kurt and a needy sound from himself that was lost in the train of kisses that he and Kurt were trading. But Blaine was tired of being pushed around by Kurt, tired of being moved and told exactly what to do, what he could and couldn’t do, and as he was flipped and pinned, Blaine could feel the same anger that had driven him to bite Kurt rise in his chest again.
As soon as the issue was ordered, when Kurt’s hands let go of his wrists, Blaine started to move. At first, he just moved his hips, rucking up as Kurt tried to unbutton and then ripped open his shirt. He could hear the buttons ping as they fell to the floor, but Blaine really couldn’t have cared less in the moment about the shirt. He had four more in darker and lighter shades of purple; he’d be fine.
What was getting to him, however, was the fact that Kurt’s tongue and lips were far too good at what they did. Blaine sucked in a deep breath that ended in a sound that Blaine hadn’t known he was even capable of making. It fell somewhere between a grunt and a groan, but it was breathy and low, and Blaine wanted Kurt to make him do it again. “Kurt,” he murmured, rising up on his elbows. He was entirely aware of the rule he was breaking, moving, but he didn’t care. The defiance made him feel good, thrilled him somewhere deep that went straight to his cock. He lifted a hand to thread through Kurt’s hair and tried to push him further down his chest, to the waistline of his jeans. “God, I want your mouth. I want you to. Mnn, Kurt, can you…” Blaine huffed a sigh and shifted his hips, bucking them upward for him to understand. “God, do it, please.”
Kurt hadn’t noticed Blaine’s blatant disregard for his order to stay still. He was too busy drowning in the taste of Blaine’s skin, too busy dipping his tongue along every dip, every curve, and every plane of Blaine’s exposed skin. He tasted fantastic and there was no way Kurt was ever going to get enough. His tongue swirled in the base of Blaine’s neck down to his right nipple. He ran rings around the rose colored peak before drawing into his mouth and taking t between his teeth. He did the same to the left and then his tongue was dipping lower to Blaine’s navel, nipping around the edges, laving against Blaine’s abs before trailing back up.
That’s when he felt Blaine rising beneath him, his name tumbling from Blaine’s lips. Oh god that was almost enough to push him over the edge and Blaine hadn’t even touched him. The fog in his brain cleared just enough for him to get what Blaine was hinting at, but also enough for him to realize that Blaine half sitting up and his hips were rising off the bed. When he was supposed to be laying still.
It wasn’t as if Kurt didn’t want to suck him off. Of course he did, he wanted to suck every inch of Blaine and watch while Blaine came completely undone. In fact that had been his plan to begin with. His mouth was already watering at the thought. Still, Blaine was practically challenging him and he couldn’t ignore it, he couldn’t even if he’d wanted to.
Kurt sat up and as he did so he pushed Blaine back down. “You weren’t supposed to move.” He began, his tone even despite his ragged breathing. His hands moved to Blaine’s fly as he spoke. “I’m going to undress you, then I’m going to suck your dick until you can’t remember your own name, but if you…” Kurt leaned down to kiss Blaine’s stomach lightly. “…Don’t hold still…” He kissed him again, his mouth trailing lower as he began pulling Blaine’s zipper down. “…Then I’m going to…” He jerked Blaine’s pants down past his hips still keeping his dick trapped in his underwear as he leaned down again and bit into to flesh just at his hip bone. “…Make you.” Then he worked the pants and underwear down to the tops of Blaine’s thighs revealing the most gorgeous cock Kurt had ever seen.
He looked up to meet Blaine’s eyes. Kurt licked his lips. God Blaine was hot. “Don’t fucking move Blaine.” He said this a little louder now and then he moved down Blaine’s legs until he was hovering right above his dick. Then he began licking first the tip and then from the base to the tip in single swipes that made his head spin. The taste of Blaine was so concentrated here, so potent. Kurt thought he could do this every day and never get enough. Blaine was salty and spicy and so fucking good it almost hurt. Finally Kurt sank his mouth over Blaine’s cock and hummed in delight as he did so.
His hands held to Blaine’s hips, pinning him, holding him down as Kurt moved above him. He varied the ways that he licked and sucked, listening for reactions from Blaine so he would know when he enjoyed something particular, and then he worked to get more from Blaine, more sounds, more sighs, as his mouth worked up and down the length of Blaine. Everything was wetness and hardness against Kurt’s tongue and he had to force himself to relax his throat because Blaine was bigger than what he’d had lately but all of it was just so perfect. He could lose himself right here, he almost wanted to.
No. That was the first thought to come to Blaine’s mind when Kurt told him that he was supposed to stay still. That thought was quickly followed by the thought that he should move, and that he should move now. The promises that Kurt was making, the way that he promised Blaine wouldn’t be able to think of anything, let alone his own name, made Blaine want to do anything other than sit still. It made him wriggle with anticipation, stilling only when Kurt undid his zipper and leaned down. Blaine’s jaw dropped down as he lifted his head from the bed. He wanted to watch the way that Kurt did it, wanted to learn. That, however, was when instead of taking off his underwear and going down on him, Kurt bit down on the skin right above Blaine’s hipbone and finished his sentence.
Blaine’s hips arched up high and a string of babble started to come from his mouth, far too gone to be embarrassed by the way that the simple nip made him feel. “Kurt, oh God Kurt that was…what in the world was that? Oh, my God that’s so good. I don’t, I don’t, oh, God, yes.” The babble continued as Blaine was stripped and Kurt started to lick wet stripes up the side of his cock, though there were noises that combined with the half words, leaving “Oh God”s hanging to whimper and gasp and try to pull air into his lungs that wouldn’t stay because he needed to exhale and breathe and do it all over again.
Kurt’s mouth felt around his cock. There was the way that his tongue swirled patterns along the underside of it, making Blaine open his mouth but no sound would come out. And then there was the way that his lips felt, and Blaine groaned and panted, wanting, needing more than just this. “Oh, my God Kurt,” Blaine breathed, and then was suddenly struck by the thought that he needed to move, he needed to take Kurt’s challenge. First, he rose his hands to Kurt’s hair again, but he didn’t stop there. Blaine lifted his hips when Kurt would bob down on him, feeling his breath catch in his throat at the way Kurt’s thumbs would dig into the hipbone and Blaine would see spots in his vision.
It still wasn’t enough. Blaine knew what he was getting into when he opened his mouth and breathed “Please, Kurt more,” so softly that he wasn’t even sure he said it, but he couldn’t stop it. His body needed more, needed friction, needed Kurt so badly that he ached with it. He removed his fingers from Kurt’s hair and ran his fingers as far as they would reach down Kurt’s arms and across his back, feeling around his sides and the way that his waist felt as it turned into hips. He was touching Kurt, knowing his body, and it still wasn’t enough. “More.” This time when he said it, he knew Kurt heard him.
Somewhere there was a voice. Kurt was so lost on sucking dick, he felt like the whole world was just Blaine’s perfect dick in his mouth. His jaw ached from the torture he was putting himself through but it didn’t even matter, nothing mattered but this. But then he heard it again, and it was his name keening out of Blaine’s mouth. “Please Kurt, more.” He came to his body then, slowly, sensation spreading out like a wave along his limbs. “More.” Blaine was saying and Kurt had about a dozen realizations at once.
Blaine was touching him, he was writhing around beneath him, and most importantly he was not keeping still. Kurt stopped immediately and pulled off Blaine with a lewd wet sound. Even as he did it, Kurt’s body strained with all its might to answer Blaine with the more he needed. Kurt held tight to whatever control he had left. Three things were warring themselves out in his mind as his eyes trailed up to meet Blaine’s. One, Blaine wasn’t going to lay still and that Kurt and promised to make him if he didn’t. Two, Kurt absolutely loved to hear Blaine beg for more. He’d always enjoyed begging from his partners, but this was so far beyond that. This was like a need that Kurt had never known existed. Finally the third was a just a tiny bit of anger. Here he was giving the greatest head of his life and Blaine couldn’t obey a simple command like don’t move. This left Kurt feeling like Blaine needed to learn a lesson or two. Or four. It was just as thrilling as the other thoughts.
He moved slowly, almost too slowly for his own satisfaction as he crawled up Blaine’s body unit they were face to face and Kurt was back to holding him flat against the bed. “You just had to disobey me, didn’t you?” He put a finger to Blaine’s mouth to keep him quiet while he spoke. “Now I’m going to have to restrain you.” With that he reached over to his bedside table and opened the drawer without taking his eyes off Blaine. He only had to search for a moment and then he was pulling a blue silk scarf from the drawer. Kurt didn’t give Blaine time to see it or react before he was tugging one of Blaine’s hands up and tying it to his headboard. Then he did the same with the other hand, fastening the two together so that Blaine could clasp his hands or grip the headboard if he liked, but he could not slip out of the restraint it provided.
Kurt pulled back and took the sight of Blaine tied to his bed all the way in. “Try it out.” Kurt breathed. “Escape.” He smirked down at Blaine but inside it was all he could do not to just ravish Blaine right then and there. Blaine was trussed up and only half undressed and it made Kurt’s cock throb painfully.
As soon as Blaine lost contact with Kurt’s mouth, he whined and pushed his hips upward, trying in vain to chase the wet heat and pleasure. “Nng, Kurt, don’t…” His plea for Kurt to come back trailed off slowly as a finger was pressed to his mouth. Blaine’s chest rose and fell more quickly a he was promised to be restrained. He’d never even thought of restraining someone as a sexual turn-on. Sure, he’d heard about people who liked being tied up, and had laughed off tales of kinky sexual escapades at his old school, but it had never affected him. Now, though, Blaine’s lips were quivering with Kurt’s promise.
While Kurt was speaking, Blaine opened his mouth to talk over him, to try to plead his way into getting Kurt’s mouth back on his cock. But instead of being able to speak, Blaine could taste Kurt’s finger, the slight salty taste of sweat off his own body while his hands were all over Blaine’s body. In a quick move, Blaine pulled Kurt’s finger into his mouth with his bottom lip and tongue, and began to suck on it lightly, whimpering with anticipation and a little bit afraid at how much he liked having something in his mouth. He sucked until the finger was pulled away to grab something from his dresser drawer, licking his lips and waiting.
All of a sudden, Blaine’s hands were above his head, tied to the headboard. He gasped and looked up and behind him, seeing the remnants of a blue scarf. It was soft against his wrists, and it only took Blaine a moment to recognize the material as silk. When Kurt told him to escape, Blaine yanked his wrists down, trying to pull them down and out of the loops of the knots. When that didn’t work, he pushed his hands together and tried again, groaning in frustration as it didn’t work. And then Blaine cock jumped and the groan turned into a whimper as he realized that he couldn’t get out. The thought of being there just for Kurt drove him a little more than crazy. His mouth went dry.
“Kurt, please, I, don’t…” Blaine trailed off as he tried to collect his thoughts. He blinked and took a deep breath. He wanted more. His entire body screamed for it, but the words were lost because he hardly knew exactly what more consisted of, let alone how to ask for it without blushing and stammering through it like the awkward virgin. “Wait, come back, Kurt. Closer, please, come closer.” Watching Kurt stare at him was hot, but he felt vulnerable and naked without Kurt’s touch. “Touch me, will you? Or something. I need…more. Please.”