Dec. 31, 2011, 6:01 a.m.
How It Falls Apart: Chapter 29
E - Words: 3,706 - Last Updated: Dec 31, 2011 Story: Complete - Chapters: 29/29 - Created: Oct 28, 2011 - Updated: Dec 31, 2011 216 0 0 0 0
"Hey," Damien greeted. He looked just as nervous as Kurt felt. "Thanks for doing this. Again. I just... I don't hate you, and I don't want you hating me. I don't think it has to be like that no matter how fucked up things started out."
The bluntness of the statement brought a smile to Kurt's face. "I don't either. That's why I'm here. Well, that and the opportunity to remind Rachel that she isn't the only star around here."
Damien laughed and let his backpack drop onto the floor before clapping his hands together. "Then let's get this party started!"
*******
Despite their mutual misgivings, the practice went like a dream, and Kurt felt completely confident by the time they stood in front of the club. It was shockingly easy to get into the spirit as the music played and they danced circles around one another. It was light, playful. Kurt couldn't help but feel his mood lifting, and they were both grinning by the time the song was over and they were taking their bows. //He may be a bit of an ass, but he's a talented ass,// Kurt mused as he favored his duet partner with a warm smile before they both retired to their seats to let the next student take a turn.
Finn couldn't tear his eyes away from Kurt while he and Damien performed for the rest of glee club. His stepbrother lit up like a Christmas tree when he sang, and Finn's heart raced. It seemed like forever since he'd last seen Kurt genuinely happy. By the end of class, he hoped Kurt would be positively radiant with joy. When Mr. Schuester started to call for the next volunteer, Finn got on his feet and stood before the others. He probably should have been nervous, but all he could feel was excitement over what he had planned.
"I know a lot of you are probably wondering why I've been acting differently lately," he began, his gaze sweeping over the room. "The truth is, I learned something very important about myself, and it took busting my leg and totaling my car to wake me up to who I really am and what I really want." Finn focused on Kurt, stepping forward and proudly declaring, "I'm bi; Finn Hudson is bisexual. And this song is especially for you."
“When I'm with you
I shake inside
My heart's all tangled up
My tongue is tied it's crazy
Can't walk, can't talk, can't eat, can't sleep
Oh, I'm in love, oh I'm in deep 'cause baby
With a kiss you can strip me defenseless
With a touch I completely lose control
'Til all that's left of my strength is a memory, woah...
I get weak when I look at you
Weak when we touch
I can't speak when I look in your eyes
I get weak when you're next to me
Weak from this love
I can't speak when I look in your eyes
I get weak
Convincing eyes, persuasive lips
The helpless heart just can't resist their power
You know you've got a hold over me
You know you've got me where I want to be 'cause lover
Like a wave you keep pulling me under
How I'll ever get out of this I don't know
I just know there's just no way to fight it, woah...
I get weak when I look at you
Weak when we touch
I can't speak when I look in your eyes
I get weak when you're next to me
Weak from this love
I'm in deep when I look in your eyes
I get weak I get weak I get weak
Just a kiss you can strip me defenseless
Just a touch I completely lose control
'Til all that's left of my strength is a memory, woah...
I get weak when I look at you
Weak when we touch
I can't speak when I look in your eyes
I get weak when you're next to me
Weak from this love
I'm in deep when I look in your eyes
I get weak I get weak I get weak”
Kurt's jaw dropped at the confession and the hushed gasp that went through the room. When Finn began to sing, their eyes locked and never wavered. He had never felt anything like it. By the time Finn was done, he was too rapt to even notice until the silence stretched out. Kurt found his smile just in time and began a furious round of applause that quickly caught on when Damien joined in too. He heard the other teen whistle but couldn't bring himself to look away from Finn long enough to gauge the other reactions.
Mr. Schuester put a hand on Finn's shoulder and offered him a warm smile. "That was very brave, Finn, and we'll all be here to support you. Right, gang?"
Finn, flushed and gazing nonstop at Kurt, started at Mr. Schu's touch. "Thanks," he said, his heart pounding as if to burst. Kurt was beaming, his hands nearly red from thunderous applause. His good mood deflated slightly when Quinn huffed, rolled her eyes and stormed out of the room. It was inevitable; she was still hurting, but Finn couldn't do anything except be honest with her, Kurt, and everyone. When Blaine stood up, Finn braced himself. Was he about to get clocked again?
"Amazing job," Blaine said, offering Finn a genuine smile.
"Yeah?" Finn sat back down beside Kurt, and was surprised when Blaine reached over to offer his hand in friendship. Were they burying the hatchet? Well, that was just fine. Once things settled back down, he gave Kurt a friendly nudge and whispered, "Did you really like it?"
"It was perfect," Kurt agreed, feeling a lump in his throat as he looked at the other teen. "Absolutely perfect." He could feel eyes on them and refrained from saying more. He wanted this moment to be about Finn and his honesty and not anything more. "We should talk later," Kurt added even more softly.
"Okay," Finn agreed, thrumming with excitement. He wanted class to be over with immediately. Having waited for what seemed like an eternity for Kurt, he decided that a few minutes more couldn't hurt and settled back in his seat. His pulse continued to race, and he wiped his damp palms on his jeans. Finn couldn't remember ever feeling such a rush of anticipation. Had his outpouring of emotion finally convinced Kurt of how much he truly loved and wanted him?
Behind them, Damien threaded his fingers together with Blaine's and smiled. "Glad you liked it, and... thanks for, y’know." He nodded toward Finn to show what he meant. "Not that it's any of my business, but... you should talk to Kurt. I know it's weird and hard, but you should. You guys were friends first, right? Maybe you can get there again."
"I don't know," Blaine started cautiously. "I'm crazy about you, you know that, but when I see Kurt... it's just tough." He missed Kurt and not being able to even say a friendly 'hello' was terrible. What Blaine wanted to avoid most was reopening old wounds. Could they really just be friends? Although Finn would never be Blaine's favorite person in the world, if the jock made Kurt happy then he wanted to be happy for him. Maybe that's how he could start a conversation up?
"After class. Just... do it, okay? Just tell him the song was good." Damien nudged his boyfriend and made Blaine meet his eyes. "You both need to figure it out. If there's no way, there's no way, but I think you're selling yourselves short."
A few seats in front of them, Kurt found himself casting glances over at Finn throughout the rest of the performances. He could barely keep his attention on anything but the jock, could do nothing but repeat the brave confession over and over in his mind. Finn had looked so confident, so gorgeous. Kurt managed to make himself look around a little. He caught Rachel giving him a questioning gaze and shook his head slightly before shrugging. She seemed to accept that for the moment and flashed him a tentative smile that still looked confused.
Blaine, having summoned up the courage to repair his friendship with Kurt, stood up when Mr. Scheuster asked for the next glee club member to sing. He'd chosen a song that meant something to him and Damien, giving it a hard rock twist as the assignment specified. Taking a breath and smiling at Damien, he launched into his own version of Foreigner's "I Want To Know What Love Is."
Blaine finished to a thunderous round of applause. His dancing, coupled with the deep emotion he had put into the song, had left him breathless. He returned to his seat beside Damien, and no longer worried about hurting Kurt now that Finn had made his feelings clear to everyone, he pressed a kiss to Damien's lips right then and there.
Though Damien was normally a proponent of them keeping things pretty PG to spare Kurt's feelings, he couldn't help but grin at the easy affection as he tangled his fingers together with Blaine's. "That was beautiful," he assured in case the applause hadn't told the other boy as much. It was comforting to know that Blaine was as proud to be with him as he was to be with the dark-haired beauty.
Kurt felt a momentary pang at the sight, but it wasn't as bad as it had been even a week before. Things were shifting between them, and he just hoped that it would all come together somehow. Deciding that now was the time to be bold, Kurt offered both of them a smile. "He's right. It was wonderful... not that I'd expect anything less." Kurt tried not to hold his breath as he waited for a response, praying that they could at least begin making things right.
"Thank you, Kurt," Blaine replied, genuinely surprised and relieved all at the same time. It was the first time the two of them had spoken without painful icicles dangling in the air, waiting to fall and pierce their hearts again, "but I think you and Damien will definitely be getting an A plus for your performance." It was true, the two of them singing in harmony had been the most spectacular combination Blaine had ever heard. Taking a chance, he leaned forward to Finn and whispered loud enough for both Kurt and Damien to hear, "If we're not careful, they're going to steal the leads right out from under us."
That surprised Finn, who blinked and realized what Blaine was trying to do. //He's actually being nice to me?// Not wanting to sour the moment, he nodded and smiled crookedly as he said, "Yeah, I think we'd better keep an eye on these two."
"Try all you like," Kurt answered, lifting his chin and squaring his shoulders. "We're done singing background for you two." He cast a warning glance at both Finn and Blaine before smiling warmly at Damien. "I think between the two of us, we could probably muster a decent mutiny."
"Hmmm... y'know, he makes a pretty good point. Think we could buck this whole clean cut image the club's got going," Damien mused as he pretended to consider the plan. "Nothin' personal, baby, but it's gonna look a lot better on my college apps if I can say I was part of a hostile takeover of the glee club. Sure you understand."
"Uh oh," Finn started, his gaze flicking meaningfully toward Blaine. "They're starting to conspire together. I think we're in trouble, dude." Before he had a chance to tease them any further, class came to an end and he found himself being assailed with questions from his friends.
With Kurt alone for the moment, Blaine mustered his courage and seized his chance. He excused himself from Damien's side, giving Kurt a gentle nudge. "Could we go someplace quiet and talk? Please?"
Though he felt a flutter of nerves at the question, Kurt nodded at once. "Of course." He caught Finn's eye, giving him a reassuring smile before ducking out of the room while everyone else assaulted Finn with a million questions. Kurt knew he couldn't help the jock, that it was something Finn needed to deal with on his own. Hoping that it was a good talk and not a bad one, Kurt sat down on a bench off the main hallway and glanced nervously up at the other boy. "So..."
Blaine felt a tremor in his heart. It should not have been this easy for Kurt to accept. He fully expected Kurt to still be rightfully angry with him, but here he was sweet and giving as ever. "The truth is, I'll always care about you," he started beneath a tremulous breath. "Nothing in the world can ever change that, Kurt. I'll always treasure what we shared." Tears sprang to his eyes, burning them with emotion. Blaine mustered a smile, brushing a hand through his unruly hair. "Think I'm gonna keep on letting it grow out. Maybe to my shoulders." He laughed softly, realizing how scandalized Kurt would be over the look. "So, you and Finn?" Blaine eased back into the subject. "I never thought he had it in him to be so... open and honest." He sniffled, adding playfully, "All I can say is that he'd better make you happy, or else I'll have to clock him again."
Once he was done giving Blaine a skeptical stare over his potential fashion decision, Kurt found himself smiling gently. "I'll hold you to that. I'm afraid I'm rather spoiled. Thanks to you, I expect a great deal from anyone I date." Blaine Anderson was not an easy act to follow. Despite all the problems they'd encountered, Kurt had never known anyone so good or kind in his life. Blaine was special to him and always would be. "Does this mean... if it's too much, just say no, but... does this mean we can talk? Sometimes? Just... coffee? Something?" He knew it might be a lot to ask, but Kurt found himself holding his breath as he waited for Blaine's response.
"Of course we can," Blaine agreed, relieved over finding how easy talking with Kurt again had turned out to be. He gave him another gentle nudge. "You can also call me anytime. I've still got your number on speed dial, but I've been too afraid to use it." His face warmed over that admission. "You can especially feel free to let me know what happens between you and Finn. I'll be dying to find out." It was a strange feeling to be discussing your ex's other romantic interest, but Blaine actually found himself rooting for the stepbrothers to make a go of it. As long as Kurt was happy, then he was too.
"Really?" Kurt looked both excited and relieved by the prospect. He wasn't sure how things would go, who they would want to tell. It was going to be more than slightly awkward considering that they were stepbrothers, not just friends. But if it worked... well, that was the part that made Kurt willing to risk so much. "That would be... well, it would be amazing. It's going to be an adjustment, and I just... I don't know who else would understand as well."
"You've cared about Finn for a long time," Blaine pointed out. Again, it struck him how much less painful it was to talk about than expected. "Before you two were ever stepbrothers. If anyone has a problem, you just make sure they know that." Finn had gone through quite a radical change, and Blaine just hoped that the jock could be everything Kurt wanted him to be. "You and Finn are gonna make one hell of a hot couple," he added, his speech revealing how Damien had rubbed off on him. "I doubt anybody'll complain about that."
Kurt blushed furiously and slapped Blaine on the shoulder gently. "Honestly! You'll be cursing like a sailor soon. You don't have to forget completely that you're a gentleman, you know." He was more amused than annoyed, but he could also feel the butterflies in his stomach getting a bit more active as the minutes ticked by. "I'd like to see about a little crowd control," he confessed, rising and nodding toward the choir room. "I'm guessing your better half will be ready to have you back by now."
"You're right," Blaine agreed, straightening and glancing into the choir room. He could spot Finn trying his best to disentangle himself from his classmates while Damien watched from the side thoroughly amused by the situation. "I think Finn could definitely use a bit of rescuing." Blaine ticked his head toward the door and promptly charged inside. Grabbing Damien's arm, he started to clear their fellow glee club members away and Finn seized his chance with a silent "thank you" to reunite with Kurt.
"I owe Blaine one," he declared, flushed and breathless. "I felt like I was in the middle of one of those Barbara Walters Specials you like to watch on Oscar night." Finn beamed at Kurt, reaching out almost shyly to nudge his stepbrother forward. "C'mon, let's get outta here before they start up on you, too!"
"Oh, god... please," Kurt agreed, looking horrified at the idea. They had some things to figure out before they worried about involving anyone else in the process. He almost reached for Finn's hand but thought better of it as they hurried out to the car. "I know just where to go." Kurt smiled and turned on the radio before driving them to the park, stopping almost exactly where they had the last time they'd visited what felt like forever ago. After they sat for a moment in silence, Kurt finally looked over at Finn. "What you did today was brave. Very brave. I'm so proud of you for standing up in front of everyone." Finn knew what he'd gone through, had seen it all, and he'd still chosen to be honest with his friends.
"Thanks..." Finn's heart pounded hard and fast, and the rushing blood in his ears deafened him for a moment. "I don't think I've ever felt happier, standing there and being honest with everyone." His smile was warm and brilliant. "It really makes me wish I'd've had the courage to do this a long time ago." He shifted closer to Kurt, reaching out and brushing his fingers across his stepbrother's hand. "You're the best thing that's ever happened to me, Kurt," he continued softly, his words heartfelt and his eyes deep with meaning. "I'm sorry it took me so long to realize it."
Kurt couldn't help but smile in return, his hand turning so that he could clasp Finn's in his own. "You're worth the wait." It would have been worth an even longer one - worth almost anything, really, to feel the thrill that coursed through him as their fingers tangled up together. "I hate to say I told you so, but you really should have noticed how amazing I am right away." The words were teasing, and Kurt gave Finn's hand a gentle squeeze. "Right now, I think I'd just like you to notice how much I'd like you to kiss me. If we're going to be dating, I think we should have an official kiss."
Finn, who had been holding his breath in anticipation of Kurt's reaction, gasped as he smiled even wider, "Yeah, I think so too." He had been waiting so long for this moment, dreaming and aching for it to happen, that he really thought he might have been dreaming. It was only thanks to the solid, reassuring warmth of Kurt's hand that finally convinced Finn he was awake. His heart racing, he tenderly caressed Kurt's cheek with his free hand as their eyes burned together. Slowly he brushed their lips together in a kiss so achingly tender and sweet that Finn moaned helplessly.
The kiss was everything that it needed to be: a gentle promise of what was to come. Kurt drew back with a sigh, smiling at his stepbrother. His heart felt lighter than it had in a long, long while. "I love this. I love being able to do this." There was no guilt now, nothing but the two of them together. It was perfect. There was just one last hurdle. "We should talk to our parents. I know it's soon, but if they find out because they walk in on us... we'll be grounded until we're far too old to enjoy it."
"I'm ready to face anything," Finn replied, pressing another soft kiss to Kurt's lips. "Let's do it now, okay? We've already got a lot of lost time to make up for." As much as he wanted to stay right there simply loving Kurt, Finn knew there wasn't a snowball's chance in hell of them making any more progress as long as their parents were still in the dark. He couldn't predict how his mother and Burt might react to the news, but he was prepared to fight for Kurt if it came down to it. "Promise me one thing?" he asked, caressing Kurt's cheek and staring deep into his eyes. "You and me, we'll have a date when this is over?"
"Obviously. I am not going through all this and not at least getting dinner out of it," Kurt answered with a playful smile. Despite the awkward conversation looming before them, he felt wonderful. Somehow it would work out. He knew that his father and Carol weren't going to be pleased, exactly, but he also knew that Burt wanted him to be happy - and that had been a rather hit or miss proposition since things went south with Blaine.