Blaine woke the following day with the road still left untraveled being as much a mystery as it had been the night prior. If only Blaine could get off the road altogether and take a very long pit stop. But there wasnt any time in Blaines busy life to take any sort of break and there was certainly no time for metaphors either. It was too close to the end of term for Blaine to stay in bed so he forced himself to get up and face the day ahead – no matter how much it would suck.

At first it was going well enough as Blaine went through his usual morning routine: he showered, got dressed and ate a quick breakfast. But just as he was putting the final touches on his hair it all fell apart. Try as he might, Blaine couldnt keep his many thoughts about Kurt out of his mind. Should he try to contact him? As terrifying as that the idea was, Blaine knew the longer he waited to face him the harder it would be. Blaine glanced as his phone and swore under his breath -- or the less profane equivalent – he had to go. And without hearing Kurts cheerful morning greeting too. Ugh. This was going to be the worst day ever, he just knew it.

Blaine entered the correct classroom feeling totally alone even though it was full of people. He took a seat far in the back and just sat there quietly; looking anything but his usual friendly self. Blaines patience was also no where to be found as he checked his watch and discovered that there was five minutes left until the lesson would start! Maybe he could use that time just to let Kurt know he wanted to talk to him once he was finally free.

Kurt, Blaine sent in attempts to reach his friend but there was no reply. Not even the slightest him of Kurts presence. Blaine frowned; what was going on? Every other time Blaine had contacted Kurt he had always replied. Was he that pissed off at him? Blaine shuddered at the thought.

“Psst, Earth to Blaine, where have you gone?” Sam hissed at Blaine.

Thanks to his friends query, Blaine snapped out of it and flashed Sam a sheepish grin. “Sorry, Im okay Sam, thanks,” he whispered back.

Blaines predictions turned out to be a bit dramatic though and his afternoon – while long – didnt end up being all that horrible. Never the less, as soon as the school portion of the day was over Blaine had one thing on his mind: he had to talk to Kurt. He had no idea what he was going to say to him or what could happen but he had to do it. Blaine nearly managed to make his hasty retreat out of the main building of the school when he heard someone call his name. He turned around to see Sam, Joe and three of their mutual friends heading towards him.

“Blaine, were going to go bowling. Up for joining us?” Joe said.

In any other situation Blaine would have said yes, but he couldnt go another second without seeing Kurt, who still wouldnt respond to his calls.

“Um actually guys, Ill have to take a rain check,” Blaine muttered and then he saw Joe and Sam eye him warily, as if to say what are you doing?. Blaine sighed. He knew this wouldnt help the rumours about him but he had bigger things to worry about. “I just have a few loose ends to take care of,” Blaine added and he was off, bringing out his phone to send text to Joe that said.

I just need to talk to Kurt. Can you cover for me? Sam too. Please!

Joes reply came a few minutes later.

All right but you owe us, Blaine. Big time.

Thanks!

With there finally being nothing left to get in his way, Blaine ran fearlessly off to find Kurt, or maybe he was running because if he stopped for even a second his courage would leave him. Either way Blaine charged ahead. Somehow Blaine had to make Kurt understand that he could never make him happy, and that he deserved so much better.

Blaine arrived at his destination and stood in front of Kurts door apprehensively. He took a deep breath, knocked on the door and waited -- for what felt like ages. Blaine knocked again, louder this time, in the hopes that Kurt was there and just hadnt heard him somehow. “Kurt, its me, Blaine, are you there?” Blaine said in a raised voice.

There was a click of the lock and the door opened to reveal Kurt, who was shirtless and wearing only a pair of bold coloured boxer-briefs. At the sight of Blaine, Kurts hardened gaze softened slightly, but it was nowhere near the friendly manner Blaine was used to seeing. “Oh, hello Blaine, you all right there?”

Blaine couldnt stop his eyes from widening at seeing Kurts state of dress. Something was off, why wasnt Kurt inviting him inside and why was he practically naked at this time of day? “You werent answering any of my calls,” Blaine said.

Kurt ran a hand through his messy hair; of course Blaine didnt recognize the tell tale signs when someone had just had sex. “Oh that, I was otherwise engaged,” he casually explained.

“Is this a bad time?”

Kurt sighed. He was still pretty worn out and Taylor was still in the apartment showering. What to do: should he send Blaine away and deal with him when he was more prepared or should he just get it over with now? After-all, he had nothing to hide and honestly, Blaine could use a reminder that other guys didnt have any trouble acting on their attraction towards him.

“In a way, but since youre here already, you can come on in,” Kurt said finally, opening the door so Blaine could step inside. “Im just gonna go put something on. Ill be back in a sec,” he added.

Blaine could only mumble a quick okay in response because he was too distracted by the various warning signals going off in his mind. First there was Kurts cool demeanour towards him and then there was the sinking suspicion to why Kurt wasnt wearing any clothes. He scanned the apartment for any clues and to his horror: he quickly found one. There, lying on the floor half under a magazine was a condom – a used one. Blaine suppressed a shudder but seeing it didnt gross him out or anything, no, his reaction was for another reason altogether.

Kurt hooked up with someone -- recently, Blaine concluded.

Kurt returned a moment later wearing a pair of grey sweat pants and black long sleeve shirt. Blaine had never seen him look so casual before. What did that mean? Often Kurts wardrobe gave clues to the mood he was in and his current lack of colour, or style, was concerning. What was he doing? Stop worrying about Kurts clothes and do what you came here for, his conscience nagged at him.

“Kurt, we need to talk,” Blaine began.

“Fine, go ahead and start talking then,” Kurt said.

The rigidness in Kurts tone was hardly encouraging for Blaine to hear but he refused to shy away this time, not when there was so much at stake. “Kurt, I--” Blaine started, but his words were cut off when an attractive looking guy with black hair and green eyes waltzed out of Kurts bedroom, totally oblivious to the awkward situation hed just stepped into.

The guy, who was grinning giddily, had a cheery swagger in his step and his smile actually grew when he noticed Kurt standing there. He made his way over to him, ignoring Blaine completely. “Hey, well that was quite a fun ride. We must do it again sometime,” he chimed.

“We really should, Taylor,” Kurt said, using his name for Blaines sake, though his friend didnt look very pleased to learn his name.

Taylor smirked at Kurt and reached out to take hold of Kurts hand so he could place a piece of paper in it. “Thats my number, so be sure to call me, okay? I know you said anything beyond casual isnt your style but I would be up for more, if youre interested in seeing what thats like. Id love to take you out on a real date and get to know you better. Think how good the sex would be then,” he said, wiggling his eyebrows at Kurt for empathizes.

Kurt laughed at Taylors antics; he was pretty cute, also an animal in bed, so that was two things going for him. Of course, there was Blaine to think about, and it was hard to ignore him when he was standing there, silently scowling at him and Taylor. “Im always up for trying new things,” Kurt flirted.

Taylor laughed, “Dont I know it!”

Blaine coughed lightly in attempts to remind the two men that he was there.

“Oh, I have a rival, do I? Or am I already too late and Mr. Dapper over here has taken you off the dating market?” Taylor playfully asked.

“This is Blaine, hes a friend of mind,” Kurt said.

Blaine just nodded at Taylor in greeting, though his attempts to be polite were pointless because the young mans attention was still fixated on Kurt. Taylor leaned in to give Kurt a quick peck on the lips before heading towards the door. He let himself out without saying goodbye, leaving the pair of friends alone to sort out their many issues. Blaine studied Kurt for a moment, but Kurts emotional barriers were fully up, making it impossible to read him. The only thing Blaine could gather was that Kurt apparently had no problem with his sex partner running into Blaine. Nor did he feel the need to censor himself while Blaine was around; he was flaunting it even!

“Whats going on Kurt, who was that guy?” Blaine demanded.

Kurt brought his right hand to his forehead. “Oh come on Blaine, you cant be that blind. But if you want me to spell it out for you, fine then, have it your way. That was Taylor, we met last night and we came back here to have sex and we had sex this morning too... and then later in the afternoon, because he was that good,” he said. “Or rather, we were that good together.”

Hearing what he had already guessed but didnt want to believe wasnt fun for Blaine, who took a step back from Kurt. “I cant believe you would do something like that,” Blaine stuttered in shock.

Kurt rolled his eyes. “Well believe it Blaine, because the evidence youve seen so far is too substantial to deny.” Blaines disproving expression complete with raised eyebrows was aggravating Kurt to no end, making it hard to hold back his sharp tongue. “Sorry to disappoint you Blaine, but I am an unattached male, so I can sleep with whomever I want. If you have a problem with that, then you only have yourself to blame. Because you could have been that guy, so dont get pissed at me if you didnt go for it yourself.”

“I never--” Blaine started to argue, but Kurts cold stare cut him off.

“You what? Never meant to act on your sinful desires? Never planned to acknowledge the fact that you like kissing guys? Can you really keep lying to yourself considering what happened between us yesterday?” Kurt spat. “I guess you can, since you couldnt wait to run away from me!”

Blaines anger spiked; finally boiling to the surface. “You were the one who told me to go with them!” he shouted back.

Kurt scoffed, “Oh please, dont you try to get off on a technicality.”

“Im not trying to! Why are you acting like this, Kurt?”

“Like what?”

“Like a stranger, like you dont trust me, like the past month never happened,” Blaine listed, desperately trying to reach Kurt somehow to make him understand.

“Funny, I could say the same thing about you. I see you, standing in front of me, looking at me with such pity and I find myself wondering: where did my friend go? Wheres the man who brightened my day just with a smile? I thought we could make this work; you know, be friends and not have your religious beliefs get in the way. Then you had to just go and fuck things up by kissing me and yet... Im the one who feels like I did something wrong!”

Blaine could tell that Kurt was far too angry to just forgive and forget and while Blaine felt just as irritated, in his case his friends anger towards him was playing into his many insecurities. Blaine felt so far away from Kurt, so cut off; like they were in totally different worlds. That was it wasnt it? He and Blaine were completely different, not only with their moral values but right down to their DNA.

“Kurt, It was all me. Im the one who kissed you, its my fault and I am so sorry,” Blaine said softly.

The apology, while touching, was nothing Kurt wanted to hear, so he chopped his arm through the air to silence Blaines attempts to make himself feel better. “Apology not accepted, Blaine,” Kurt snapped.

“Im only human, Kurt, and I messed up okay.”

“Oh, my god Blaine, just stop talking! Youre only making it worse!” Kurt growled, tuning away from his friend.

Blaine stubbornly refused to let Kurt walk away from him and he stood defiantly in front of him. “Whats wrong with you?”

To Blaines frustration, Kurt tried to evade Blaine again, to no avail, because Blaine managed to counter his every move. Finally when Kurt chose to look at him, Blaine saw that there were tears in his eyes. He looked so hurt and vulnerable that it caught Blaine completely off guard. “Kurt...”

Backed into a corner and with nowhere to escape, unless he used his powers but he was in no state to. Kurts final hold on his emotions broke; his lips began to quiver while his eyes darted back and forth nervously. Kurt hadnt meant to get this upset but he couldnt help himself. This was horrible and way worse than he could have imagined. Kurt knew he had to make himself very clear though, so he looked right into Blaines soft brown eyes.

“I dont want to hear you say that kissing me didnt mean anything, because it meant everything to me, Blaine,” Kurt whispered.

Oh what a fool Blaine had been; he hadnt considered things from Kurts perspective at all. Blaine might have been the first to kiss him, but Kurt had instantly responded. That said a lot about what his own feelings might be and that realization rocked him to his core.

“I wasnt thinking...” Blaine said.

Kurt let out a mocking laugh; though it didnt make him feel any better. “Oh that is so like you Blaine, to lay all the blame on yourself. But the truth of it is, neither of us were thinking and now weve paying the price.”

Blaine felt like he could cry, either from frustration, sadness or a combination of both. “What does this mean for us?”

Why did Blaine always have to say the worst possible thing? “There is no us Blaine, there never was, and its time I accept that there never will be,” Kurt countered.

“So our friendship means nothing to you then? Youre just going to give it up and throw it all away?”

Kurt threw his hands up in the air and shouted, “Youre still not listening! You mean everything to me, Blaine!”

Blaine was so angry that he only registered Kurt's accusation and not the confession that followed it.“You say that and yet look at yourself! Youre like a bomb thats about to explode!”

“Ooh... good use of an analogy Blaine... maybe I should let it all out? I already know what to begin with too: how I figured out the answer to your problems a long time ago--”

“Let me save you the trouble Kurt, because I already know what youre gonna say!” Blaine interrupted.

Kurt was too surprised by Blaine having an actual backbone to make a snarky remark. He just crossed his arms over his chest and just waited for Blaine to speak his case.

“You think my problem is that I refused to accept that Im gay, but youre forgetting one important fact Kurt: sexual orientation doesnt matter in this instance. Any man, whether theyre straight or gay, has to make the same decision when they choose to dedicate themselves to God,” Blaine explained.

Kurt rolled his eyes at Blaines wild claims; which were widely inaccurate. Blaine was in desperate need of reality check. “Nice try Blaine, but youre forgetting the fact that the Catholic Church sees homosexuality as a sin. If a gay man were to become a priest and then if he ever let the fact be known that he is gay, then I bet the reaction would be very different than if it were a straight man admitting he liked women. A straight man is respected for his selfless choice but when a gay man does the same thing then hes obviously just looking for forgiveness. As if God is the only thing can save his soul. Either that or he hides who he truly is from everyone one he knows, including God, and because of that, he can never feel accepted, comforted or loved. I wouldnt want that life for anyone, Blaine, not even you.”

Blaine hesitated for a moment; Kurt almost had him. If he werent still so angry with his friend then perhaps he could admit how most of what Kurt was saying was true. Instead he had his own counter remarks to preach at Kurt, who was looking rather smug for his tastes.

“In my case Kurt, if I were to go ahead and admit that am I gay -- and Im not saying that I am! I doubt it would fix everything. Not my personal struggles, not the issues between us, it would change nothing. I see now that the only way youll be happy is if I were to throw my life away and give it up for love. Youd be doing me a favour then too, because youd be saving me from a life of celibacy after all,” Blaine said mockingly.

Kurt gaped at Blaine. The accusation stung, even if it wasnt entirely true, Kurt still struggled to push down the rising guilt welling up in him. He was secretly hoping that being by Blaines side would make him stop denying his sexuality. Why had he been stupid enough to fall for someone like him?

Because love isnt a choice, his inner voice nagged back at him. Sometimes there was no helping it. Just like right now there was no hope of him and Blaine putting their differences aside so they could remain friends.

“Kurt... I didn't—”

“Save it, Blaine,” Kurt snapped.

Blaine opened his mouth to say something in his defense but Kurts dagger eyes rendered him silent. He already knew if he tried to apologize Kurt would just interrupt him. Fine. If Kurt refused to act like an adult, then Blaine would keep their argument going. He needed to stop worrying about what others thought and look after himself. Grow a backbone. Man up. Blaine made a break for he door while he told himself that he wasnt running, he was just leaving before things could get any worse. He turned the handle of the doorknob and opened it up, keeping his back turned to Kurt as he took a first step.

Unfortunately for Blaine, making a break for it was the worst possible thing he could have done. Kurt's anger quickly turned to pure outrage. What the fuck was he doing? How would bolting help them in the slightest? Blaine had some nerve, and Kurt wasn't going to let him get away.

“Now look whos running!” Kurt shouted, stopping Blaine in his tracks. “You were just waiting for a good excuse to get away from me all along! You blame me for you losing your way, as if its my fault that you let your grades slide. Youre so fucking delusional Blaine, all you had to do was ask me and I would have stepped back. Now that I know how you really feel, allow me to give back your life of righteousness!” Kurt said bitterly, severing the link that connected them.

Blaine was nearly knocked off his feet by the overwhelming sensation of what felt as if Blaine was suddenly missing a piece of himself. No, it was worse than that: He felt like he was going through withdrawal. Blaine staggered backwards as he tried to recover and get his heavy breathing under control. His legs kept shaking and his heart ached. Blaine looked over to see that clearly Kurt knew what he was going through.

Kurt steadied himself against the edge of the wall; the fact that cutting their link was effecting him this much was proof that hed let things between them go too far. Blaine was supposed to be just an assignment; his ticket to discovering which side he belonged on. He very much doubted either side would approve of him falling in love with a human.

“Go ahead then, go take back the life that you say you want, but dont come crying to me if you have any second thoughts, because I wont give you any second chances,” Kurt said coldly.

If Kurts beautiful face had showed any signs of remorse then maybe Blaine could have given one last attempt to mend the rift between them. Instead Blaine glanced at the door and then back at Kurt, who had drawn out his wings to remind Blaine who he really was.

“Blaine, its about time we both accept...” Kurt told Blaine sincerely, pausing to add. “...that we dont belong together.”

Blaine took Kurts words – however painful they were – straight to his bruised heart and he walked to the door, opened it and closed it behind him without looking back.
________________________________________________________________________ r32;r32;

Finally, with that meddlesome Kurt out of the way, Blaine could pay proper attention to his studies. Blaine let out a tired sigh. It was no use. No matter how he worded it, it was futile for him to try and turn Kurt into a villain, because it wouldnt make him feel any better. What Blaine felt was lonely. He missed Kurt so much it hurt. The only choice he had was to throw himself back into the life he had started to neglect: he resumed going to bible study, took back on all of his duties at church and hung out with his usual group of friends – and studying of course. For a short while, Blaine thought he was managing rather well: his grades had vastly improved and he no longer felt alienated from everyone. Little did he know that no matter how hard he tried, he couldnt forget Kurt, or the gaping hole his absence had left.

“I dont have time for this!” Blaine muttered under his breath.

“You say something, Blaine?” Joe asked absentmindedly, his attention more on his notebook than Blaine.

Oh yeah. Blaine wasnt alone; he was studying with Joe and Sam for their upcoming final in their own shared dorm room.

“I was just muttering to myself,” Blaine said truthfully, not explaining any further.

Two hours later and the studying trio were feeling a bit cagey, so they headed off to the cafeteria to refuel. Blaine smiled and laughed at his friends' comments and made sure to talk enough so neither would worry about him. How he felt on the inside was another matter though; Blaine was miserable and he only had himself to blame. How could he have said those things to Kurt?

“You must be pretty stoked huh, Blaine,” Sam said, interrupting Blaines thoughts of self pity.

Blaine blinked in puzzlement and asked, “About what?”

“How youre gonna be going to Theological College in the fall. Youll be one step closer to becoming a priest,” Sam explained.

“I envy you Blaine, how youll be so close to God,” Joe admitted.

Blaine smiled at them both; neither Joe nor Sam was studying to be priests themselves, but that didnt mean that Blaine had more faith than them. Becoming a minister, or pastor wasnt any less noble, since everyone in some way was like a priest when they shared the word of God.

“Each of us hears God's call differently,” Blaine said, quoting his own dad, who had said those exact words many times.

“Spoken like a true priest,” Sam teased.

“So have you heard any word from that friend of yours, what was his name... Curtis, lately?” Joe questioned.

Blaine, who had been chewing a piece of sandwich, nearly ended up choking at the mention of Kurt. He coughed uncontrollably, which caused a number of people in the room to look his way. Sam went so far was to pat Blaine lightly on the back to help him along and Blaine took a long drink out of his water bottle.

“Why are you asking about him?” Blaine wheezed.

“I was just curious; you havent been going out like you used to,” Joe said.

“Thats because were right in the middle of finals,” Blaine explained.

“Curtis was okay with you not being able to hang out for a while then?” asked Sam.

Blaine suppressed an eye-roll; why were his friends so curious about Kurt, who they had never even met! “Its Kurt and yes, hes fine. Its not like we were attached at the hip or anything; we both have our own separate lives,” Blaine muttered, more to himself. “Hes just a friend….” he added.

“We know that. The rumours stopped as quickly as they started too, so you have nothing to worry about,” Sam said.

“Aside from graduating,” Joe added jokingly.

They took in a movie next, after meeting up with more friends of theirs. Blaine soaked up the attention; hed always done well in crowds. Blaine was a chatterbox by nature, so if the conversation ever risked a drop Blaine was there to pick it back up again. Thankfully no mentions of Kurt came up again, but that didnt stop him from entering Blaines mind throughout the night. It was hardly what most college seniors would consider a fun night out, but Blaine still felt worn out by the end of it. He headed back to his dorm room and fell onto his bed with a heavy thud.

Of course, he couldnt fall asleep because that would have been too easy. It was still rather early in the night anyway, so Blaine sat back up. At first he wasnt sure what to do and he was just about to boot up his laptop when he got a sudden idea. He should do what he usually did whenever he was faced with a difficult question: pray to God. Blaine wasnt even sure what he would end up saying, but just talking to Him would take a load off – hopefully.

“My Lord Heavenly Father,” Blaine began, getting down on his knees. “I feel so blessed for all you have given me...” he continued, until he realized, he wasnt at the family dinner table, so there was no need to act so formal. Blaine climbed back up and sat on the bed, keeping his hands clasped together as he closed his eyes. “God, its me Blaine, your faithful servant... or I still hope to be one day anyway. Im not actually talking to you because I want to pray for something, I just... need to say some things out-loud. I find myself wondering if I have made the right choices in life. If I had done things differently... would I feel like any less of a person? Would I feel this lost still? All of these theories keep popping into my head but the most scary one is... that I am not worthy enough to become a priest. How can I prove myself to you, to the Church, and to the whole world?” Blaine spoke softly.

Blaine paused to let out a heavy sigh; he needed to tackle the bigger issue at hand, before it started to eat away at him. “I miss Kurt... so much... I feel like Im incomplete somehow now that hes gone. I know I shouldnt feel this way; that these feelings Im having arent normal. Im just so sick of feeling ashamed of my mistakes in life. I want to be happy, content, loved. I know you love me God, and I hope Ill never forget that... but I still miss him... more than I should.”

Bible and absentmindedly started to flip the pages of his Bible. “Kurt told me once, during one of the few times we breached the subject of religion, how he thinks the whole God hate gays as hed put it, was entirely made up by humans. Nowhere in the Bible does Jesus ever say anything negative about homosexuality. Ive always thought that you wouldnt hate anyone so unconditionally like that either. So why is there need to segregate anyone? Shouldnt we all be free to worship you together? There are new movements of course and new ways of thinking... but as far as the Catholic Church goes... there is still a long way to go to obtain true acceptance...”

Blaine chuckled lightly, “Imagine what my professors would say if they could hear me now?”

His moment of laughter didnt last for very long, because it was hard to laugh with such a void left in his heart. Blaine ran his finger along the golden embossed cross on the front of his Bible. “I keep wondering if you sent Kurt to me so I would learn some profound life-changing lesson... but if that was your plan... then I dont know what that lesson was.”

All of a sudden Blaines cellphone rang and he frowned; who was calling him at this time? He fished his phone out of his pocket to thumb the answer button. “Hello?”

“Blaine? Are you still awake? Im sorry for calling so late,” Blaines mothers voice spoke through the speaker.

“Im up still, is everything all right?” Blaine asked urgently. A quick glance showed him it was only 9:30pm, so he relaxed a bit.

“Everything fine dear, your father and I just wanted to let you know we bought our plane tickets finally,” Grace explained.

“Oh for my grad ceremony right? Thats great! Im really glad youre both coming for it,” Blaine muttered quickly.

“Cooper is as well. He managed to book the time off from work.”

“Ill have to text him a thank you later. When will you all be arriving?”

“At the end of this week.”

Blaine hadnt thought theyd come that soon, not since the day of his ceremony was still a week away. “Okay, let me know your arrival time and I can come pick you up at the airport,” Blaine offered.

“Oh theres no need Blaine, you have enough to deal with already. How have your finals been going so far?”

“Decently, or Id like to think so. The ones Ive taken already went well enough and there are just two more left to go.”

“I am sure youll be happy when its all over,” Grace said affectionately.

Blaine laughed, “I sure will.”

He and his mother talked for another fifteen minutes before they called it a night. Blaine let out a loud yawn as he put his phone down. Since he had a full day ahead of him tomorrow, he couldnt afford to stay up all night, nor did he want to. Blaine dressed for bed and got under his covers and tried to will himself to sleep.

Blaines dreams were full of Kurt; calling to him desperately in the darkness, urging him to locate his whereabouts. But no matter what direction he went in, Blaine could never find him. He kept running and running, shouting out Kurts name until his voice grew hoarse, but there was no answer. Kurt was lost to him, both in real life and now even in his dreams. ________________________________________________________________________r32;r32;

Blaine let out a tired sigh as he cleared the classroom doors. Another day at the races, another final exam finished and conquered. He was nearly there; he just needed to hold out a little longer. Blaine walked aimlessly down the hallways; totally cut off from the outside world. He knew he couldnt live like this; he just needed more time to recover. Blaine stopped dead in his tracks as his last thought ringing through his troubled mind: recover. Why had he thought that?

“Recovering... from what?” Blaine sighed miserably. He sounded like he was going through a bad break-up. He needed to get Kurt out of his head and away from his still confused heart. He couldnt afford to act so weak right now, not with his family coming in three days.

Blaine made his way through the school and out to his dorm room. He would just give himself a couple hours alone and then hed go off to Church to help out there as planned. If he could relax that is, maybe listening to some music would calm his mind? Blaine stepped inside his dorm room, tossed his book-bag aside and started to go through his CD collection. At first things started out great, Blaines music choice was doing wonders for his frazzled nerves, that is, until a certain song came on.

I feel so extraordinary
Somethings got a hold on me
I get this feeling Im in motion
A sudden sense of liberty
I dont care cause Im not there

It was True Faith by the band New Order; a favourite of his. As Blaine listened to the song, emotions welled up in him. The lyrics had little to no similarities to Blaine, or his life, and yet the words moved him deeply – and to tears.

And I dont care if Im here tomorrow
Again and again Ive taken too much
Of the things that cost you too much

Blaine sat on his bed hugging his knees and he brought his head down to be cradled between them. He couldnt stop crying, couldnt stop the depression building inside him. “Im so pathetic...” Blaine said.

I used to think that the day would never come
Id see delight in the shade of the morning sun
My morning sun is the drug that brings me near
To the childhood I lost, replaced by fear

Eventually Blaine pulled himself out of his crunched up position and pointed his heads upward and to the invisible heavens above. “Somebody save me please,” Blaine pleaded meekly.

Suddenly Blaine felt two hands upon his shoulders and his tightly shut eyes snapped opened to find Kurt there, kneeling over him. Blaine stared at him in bewilderment; like he could only be a mirage – or a dream. But he was really there; Kurt had come back!

Kurt smiled softly at Blaine, releasing his hold on his shoulders as he straightened himself back up. “Hi,” he breathed.

I used to think that the day would never comer32;
That my life would depend on the morning sun...

Blaine laughed awkwardly; he was in such a shock that it was hard for him to think, let alone say anything considerate. It didnt help that hed never seen Kurt look so emotional before, where where his usual barriers? None of that matters; hes here... hes really here. You need to say something. No longer laughing but with tears still in his eyes, Blaine sniffled and smiled back at Kurt hopefully. “Hey,” he said in reply.