Dating Lessons
delightful_fear
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Dating Lessons: No, No, No


E - Words: 2,009 - Last Updated: Dec 10, 2015
Story: Complete - Chapters: 21/? - Created: Nov 22, 2015 - Updated: Nov 22, 2015
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Boy I know you want me 
I can see it in your eyes 
But you keep on frontin 
Wont you say whats on your mind
Cause each and every time you near me 
You give me signs 
But when I ask you whats the deal 
You hold it all inside 
If you wanna be with me 
You gotta keep it real 
Tell me whats goin on 
Tell me how you feel 
Cause boy I know you want me 
Just as much as I want you 
So come and get my love 
Its all here for you 

----
“Check this guy out, check him out.” Sam grabbed Blaine's arm, pulling him to the edge of the sidewalk.

Blaine followed Sam's gaze to a guy who was sitting near a garbage can on a milk crate. In both of his hands, he held artificial leafy shrub sections, effectively hiding behind them. 

Standing diagonally behind him, they had a clear view as an unsuspecting young couple walked towards them. As they walked next to the seated man, he moved the bush slightly and the man who was closest jumped about a foot and let out a small shriek. They shook they heads and kept walking, chuckling to themselves.

“They call him the Bushman. He does this all over the city.” Sam whispered to Blaine.

Blaine laughed and gave Sam an evil grin. He pulled out his phone, and began texting on it.

Sam looked at him curiously. “Who are you texting?” 

“Just telling Kurt to meet us over here.” Blaine smirked over at Sam. “Do me a favor and get it on video for me? He won't recognize you.” 

Nodding, Sam stepped back into a good position, his phone ready. 

After a couple minutes, Blaine turned and gave Sam a nod, before turning back and waving at a guy heading towards him. 

Kurt was dressed in a white and navy striped t-shirt and tan shorts. He smiled at Blaine, walking towards him. Suddenly, a bush nearby moved and he jumped, almost falling over. “Fucking hell!” 

Regaining his balance, he looked over to find Blaine and a tall blond guy laughing their asses off. 

Rolling his eyes, Kurt walked over. “So, you're Sam, I assume?” He held out his hand to the smiling man, giving Blaine a bit of glare that sent him on another peal of laughter.

Sam shook Kurt's hand. “Sorry we were laughing, dude, but that was so hilarious. Want to watch?” He stepped closer and chuckled again as he re-watched the video. Kurt was soon joining him in laughter. 

Blaine stepped over and gave the Bushman some money, and then walked back to the guys. “Want to see if the sea lions are around today?” 

They agreed and walked down towards the water. The weather was mild and sunny, and even though it was early, the crowds were starting to collect at the popular tourist site. 

Stopping along the wooden railing, they looked down to the floating wooden platforms. They were about half full of sea lions, mostly lying quietly. Occasionally, one would jump up onto a platform from the water and the other's would raise onto their front flippers, barking territorially at the intruder.

“They are kind of a strange mix between walruses and otters, you know what I mean?” Kurt smiled as he watched them, looking over at the other guys. "Like the way they move around reminds me of walruses, but they seem more playful.”

Sam pointed at a large one, sitting up tall above the rest. “Look how big that one is. I bet he weighs about 400 pounds.”

Nodding, Blaine waved down to a group of smaller ones. “I think those are the females. They look like they are just relaxing in the sun, catching some rays.” 

Moving along, they got some cold drinks and wandered around, shopping in the tacky souvenir shops. 

Outside the shops, a crowd was forming around a street performer, with different sized white tubs set up and playing them with drumsticks. Kurt got into a good spot to watch, and bopped along to the beat. This guy was good. Blaine and Sam soon joined him, content to watch the show. 

Suggesting that Blaine bring Sam along was turning out great. It totally relaxed the sexual tension and awkwardness between them, and it was fun to see Blaine interacting with his friend. Although, watching Blaine occasionally, it was hard to not remember how good his kisses had felt, so hot and deep. Kurt would turn away, looking for distraction.

Sam was a good distraction. Blaine seemed to have gorgeous, tall blond men in his life, and Kurt wasn't going to complain. Dressed in a simple blue t-shirt with the words “Non-Flammable? Challenge Accepted.” and black shorts, it was still pretty obvious from his wide shoulders and muscular arms that he was very fit. He was gorgeous without seeming too aware of it, with a relaxed easy smile. 

They stopped to watch a street performer, a man who appeared to be sitting on nothing. He would shift occasionally, switching to crossing the other leg. Behind the sunglasses on his face, he revealed nothing. The funniest thing was watching the little kids who would walk right up and look underneath him, looking for a stool or something.

“Dare you to go up and goose him.” Kurt whispered to Sam. It was good to get a smile out of him. He had a really nice smile.

A little further on, they stopped to listen to a steel drum band. The beat was infectious and they were dancing along in the crowd. 

Sam leaned closer to Blaine. “Are you sure you aren't dating Kurt? He has an amazing ass.” 

Kurt must have heard the comment, because he looked over his shoulder with a bit of a grin and wiggled his hips at them. 

Blaine punched Sam's arm. “Would you keep your voice down, please? And why are you making comments on guy's asses anyways?”

Shrugging, Sam only smiled. “I'm straight, but it doesn't mean I don't have eyes. You, for example, looked really good as Captain Fabulous. You should wear eyeliner all the time.” 

Rolling his eyes, Blaine pulled him away. “Hey Kurt, want to get some dinner?”

-----
“I'm gonna steal the Declaration of Independence!” Sam drawled, his voice dropped slightly and a bit scratchy.

Kurt scoffed. “Um, gee… could it possibly be Nicholas Cage from National Treasure?”

Laughing, Sam took a sip of his beer. “Why all the attitude, Kurt?” 

“Oh please, that was the most obvious Nicholas Cage quote there could be!” He rolled his eyes at the blond.

“No, it wasn't.” Sam smiled back at Kurt, liking the banter.

Kurt set down his water glass. “It was kind of like me doing an impression like ‘What is the Matrix?'” Kurt dropped his voice for the quote.

Blaine and Sam both gave him a shocked look, and then burst out laughing. 

“Do it again! That was so good.” Sam wheezed out.

Kurt smirked, and did his best Keanu Reeves. “Bogus, dude. Excellent!”

When Blaine stopped laughing, he looked over at Kurt with a smile. “I had no idea your voice went that low.” 

“Yeah, yeah…” Kurt brushed his comment aside. “My point is that you can't pick such an obvious quote and if people guess it, assume it was because of your impression skill. It's like me saying ‘What's Up, Doc?' It doesn't make me a great Bugs Bunny impressionist if you guess it right.”

Sam turned to Blaine. “He sure does like to rant, doesn't he?” 

Blaine grinned back. “Yeah, but he's kinda cute when he gets all worked up about something, don't you think?” 

“You two just can't admit that I'm right. Which is fine, because I know I'm right and that's all that matters in the end.” Kurt turned his nose up at them, and ate the last of his coleslaw. 

Sam turned back to Blaine again. “He's cute when he's all self-righteous like that too. His eyes kinda flash.”

Blaine nodded back at him, smirking.

“Would you two stop talking like I'm not Right Fucking Here and can hear every Fucking Word?” His voice had dropped to a growl, a tone most people who had known Kurt for any length of time wouldn't take lightly.

Sam turned back to Blaine, a smile tugging at the corner of his mouth. “He's kinda cute when he gets all sweary, isn't he?” 

Glancing over at Kurt, Blaine watched as his color rose. “Um, Sam… why don't you go over to the till and pay for supper. Maybe if you pay for his meal and are extra nice to him for the rest of the night, you may live to see the dawn.”

Chuckling, Sam got up and wanted over to the cash till. 

Blaine glanced back at Kurt, his tone cautious. “Um…. I'm just going to go to the washroom. Why don't you finish your beer and join us outside in a few minutes? Take your time.” 

---
“Should we walk around and find a good spot to watch the fireworks?” Blaine asked, when Kurt finally came out of the restaurant. He'd left Sam and Blaine waiting about ten minutes.

Kurt nodded and they all headed out. Blaine and Sam were talking together quietly, and Kurt smirked a bit to himself. He'd rather have them a bit scared of him than gaining up against him. There was no way he was going to let the two younger men get away with acting like that. He'd relent and forgive them in a few minutes. 

They walked past a street performer who was wearing an oversized skull, arm and leg bones, and huge bony hands, over a black body stocking. 

“This is awesome! Take some pictures of me, OK?” Kurt ran over to the skeleton and started doing some poses with the performer. At first, it was normal things like the skeleton man standing behind Kurt and looking like he was going to grab Kurt with his enormous bony hands. Then it devolved to things like Kurt bending over with a shocked expression, as the skeleton spanked his butt. And Kurt standing with the skeleton man behind him, with his head on his shoulder and his bony hands on Kurt's chest like he was cupping boobs. Kurt had his arms up around the man's neck, giving a sultry look to the camera. The last pose was the skeleton man and Kurt standing side by side, right hand on their hips and left hand held up near their faces in the classic Beyoncé ‘Single Ladies' dance move.

Kurt gave him a big tip and went back to Sam and Blaine, smiling widely. “That was fun.” He linked his arms through theirs and tugged them along. They exchanged a look and wisely didn't comment on Kurt's abrupt mood change.

----

They found a bench as the sun was setting, and Blaine went to get them hot chocolate. There was a bit of a cool breeze coming off from the water, and dressed in only t-shirts and shorts, they were feeling a little chilled. 

Sam looked down at Kurt. “Hey man, you are shivering. Sit closer to me.”

Kurt gave Sam an assessing glance, but Sam seemed genuine in his offer. He shifted closer and it did feel better to press up against Sam's side. After a minute, Sam wrapped his arm around Kurt's shoulder and pulled him closer. 

When Blaine got back and saw them cuddled together, he just gave Sam a raised eyebrow look as he passed over the hot chocolate. 

“What? He was cold.” Sam said simply, and sipped on his drink. 

Blaine kind of huffed and sat down on the bench. “In that case, I'll help out.” He shifted closer until he was pressed against Kurt's other side. 

Kurt quietly sipped his hot chocolate. He was the sandwich filling between two gorgeous men, and he did feel warmer, so he kept his mouth shut. 

He didn't comment about how the straight guy had been fairly flirty with him all day, and the other guy, who was only supposed to be his friend, was acting strangely jealous over it.

He just sat back and enjoyed the wonderful Fourth of July fireworks show.

----

-Disclaimer: I own nothing.

-A/N: *They are running around Pier 39, famous for its street performers, tacky tourist shops, seafood restaurants, sea lions & fireworks on 4th of July. Clip of the Bushman here. Sea lions here.. Floating man here. Skeleton man here.


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