“So Kurt, tell me a normal day for you.” Dr Needham asked, looking up from his notes.

They were about 15 minutes into the session, after a week Kurt had finally had a day off to come along to a session, neither Blaine nor the doctor needed to know that Isabelle had tried to give him other days off and no, he wasn’t avoiding the office and the man his boyfriend had grown so attached to. “Uhm, well I get up, usually one of us has made breakfast, usually me. I get ready for work; Blaine gets ready to come here. I drive Blaine here, drop him off, give him a kiss goodbye then drive to work. I work, respond to texts Blaine sends me, have lunch, sometimes Blaine meets me, work usually til 5pm, drive home. When I get home one of us cooks dinner, we talk about our day, watch a movie or go out, we come home, get into bed, chat, do…other stuff then go to sleep.” Kurt said, smiling at Blaine when he mentioned him.

Dr Needham nodded and looked between Kurt and Blaine. “And are you happy?”

“Yes.” They both answered, their fingers tangled together, smiling at each other.

“If you could change anything, would you?” Dr Needham asks and Kurt remembers a session with Miss Pillsbury where he’d had to drag Blaine into her office after the Chandler debacle.

“I guess,” Kurt starts. “I mean nothing with Blaine but sometimes I wish I could rewind time and for none of this to have happened. Sometimes I wish I could be 18 again.”

Dr Needham nods. “Ok, that’s understandable after everything that’s happened but it’s that wish that’s holding you back from moving on, which keep the nightmares going. You’re holding on, you’re not letting go. You need to do that. Now, Blaine is there anything you’d change?”

“No,” Blaine says. “Kurt’s an amazing boyfriend and, I mean this happened. It hurts, it’ll always be painful but it happened and I can’t change it, I can only make the best of it and have an amazing life.” Blaine smiled and Dr Needham and Kurt both gaped at him, astounded by the progress he’d made. After weeks and months, Blaine had made a breakthrough.

“Hey bud, how’s Blaine?” Burt’s voice came through the phone, cheerful.

Kurt smiled and looked over to Blaine strumming his guitar. “He’s good thanks dad, making progress.”

“And you’re good too right?” His dad asked distractedly.

“Yeah dad, I-“

“Good, so when are you guys coming to stay? Carole and I really want to see you,” Kurt heard a voice in the background and his dad chuckled. “Finn wants to see you too. So do you have some time free?”

“I’ll try dad.” Kurt said, feeling his stomach swoop low.

Kurt could still hear his dad’s smile through the phone, unaware of how Kurt really was. “Great. Let me know. So how’s work going?”

Kurt took a deep breath against the tears that threatened to leak out and told his dad about things he really didn’t understand but he was trying and that mattered, even without the real interest in how he was.

“Hey Kurt! How’s things?”

“Ok Cooper, how are you? Do you want to talk to Blaine?”

“I’m great thanks man and in a minute, I have good news!”

“What’s that, Coop?”

“I told you guys I was auditioning for parts, right? Well I got one in a new film and the filming’s in and around L.A so I’m moving back tomorrow!”

“Coop that’s great! Hang on I’ll go get Blaine.”

“Wait, Kurt. Um, I’m sorry but have you looked into getting your own place yet?”

Kurt’s eyes widened. He’d thought about it, figured he’d have to bring it up and look into it soon but between working all the time, dealing with Blaine, therapy and fending off calls from his dad about going to visit, he hadn’t had time, he thought he’d have more. “Not yet Cooper.”

“Oh, I’m sorry Kurt you know I love you guys but Christy’s coming back with me and she doesn’t want to be waking up to Blaine crying or something or you guys…doing what you do.”

“Cooper.”

“I know I know that sounds really bad but can you understand? She wants to live with her boyfriend and I want to live with my girlfriend, she didn’t come into this with the idea that she’d have to live with her boyfriend’s brother and adopted brother with the whole therapy etc. Can you understand?”

Kurt could understand. He’d never signed up for this either. Months of Blaine, unable to be touched near his neck, shutting down in public, behaving like the world was out to hurt him, waking up to screams or screaming himself. Kurt hadn’t signed up for this when he’d looked into those big hazel eyes and fallen in love but it’s what he had and now he felt so alone with it. “Yeah,” He said, trying not to let the tears that were building in his eyes and choking his throat be heard through the phone. “I can, none of us signed up for this Coop. I’ll look into finding a place.”

“No rush man.” Cooper said quietly and hung up.

It was about two hours later over dinner when Kurt realised Cooper hadn’t talked to Blaine, had hung up before Kurt could go get him. “Cooper called earlier.” Kurt said as he speared another piece of chicken arrabiata.

Blaine looked up at him curiously. “What did he want?”

“To ask how you were and he had some news. He’s coming back to L.A, him and Christy.” Kurt said.

Blaine looked happy and confusion washed across his face. “That’s great but why didn’t he tell me?”

Kurt shrugged before replying. “He hung up before I could get you. He wants us to move out.”

“What?” Blaine said, dropping his fork and walking over to the phone. At first Kurt thought he was calling Cooper back but he just brought up the received calls and checked the time. “That was two hours ago, Kurt why didn’t you say anything?”

Kurt put down his fork and got up, walking over to Blaine. “I didn’t want to bother you. I’ll deal with it; I’ve been looking up places to live already.”

“Without asking me?” Blaine almost shouted.

Kurt felt his defences go up as he stared at his angry boyfriend. “I didn’t want to bother you; you were doing your demo. I was going to tell you, I just did but I wanted to look into places first.”

“Why?” Blaine demanded.

“I knew I’d have to go to at least one or two alone. You’ve made progress Blaine but you’re not exactly great in public all the time yet. I just wanted to save you stress.” Kurt replied. His own voice rising.

“That’s right,” Blaine replied, his eyes blazing. “Blaine the invalid, Blaine who needs protecting. I need to be able to do things Kurt and you keep hiding things from me like I’m some kid who needs to be protected!”

“Blaine it’s not like that! I’m trying to do everything here, I just wanted to save you stress!” Kurt shouted back.

“I know about Isabelle!” Blaine shouted back and Kurt reeled back in shock. “I check your calls, I know about your dad too but she asked me the other day why you hadn’t taken any of the days off she’s tried to give you. I’d like to know why too!”

Kurt’s mouth dropped open. “I work hard Blaine. I don’t want to take days off sometimes, that’s up to me.”

“But why?” Blaine yelled at him.

Kurt felt his blood boil; the words flew out of his mouth before he could stop them. “I don’t want therapy! Nothing changes Blaine. No-one asks how I am, how I’m doing, it’s always you. How’s Blaine, how’s your boyfriend, it’s never me, never how are you Kurt and that hurts and when I walk into a therapy session with the doctor telling me how badly I’m doing and how well you’re doing that fucking hurts Blaine! I do everything for you and I just want time for myself!”

“Who asked you to? I don’t need you to!” Blaine bellowed and Kurt stepped back. Blaine covered his mouth as soon as he said it and started to reach out for Kurt. “Kurt, I didn’t mean that, I…”

The look on Kurt face stopped him and the two men stared at each other. Finally Kurt’s back straightened and he looked back at Blaine, searing anger in his eyes. “Fine,” He spat. “You don’t, well I sure as hell don’t.” Kurt turned on his heel and stamped into the bedroom, slamming and locking the door before Blaine had a chance to ask what he meant.

He ran over to the door and banged on it as he heard Kurt crying and swearing to himself inside the room. “Kurt, baby I didn’t mean it, c’mon let’s talk about this. Please Kurt.”

The door didn’t unlock all night and Blaine gave up after hours of sitting against the door, talking through the wood with no reply. He stood up and walked into Cooper’s room, tears still flowing down his face and placed his hand against the door, looking back at the door to the spare room where he and Kurt had been living for the last few months. “I love you.” He whispered and shut the door, crawling into bed and falling into a fitful sleep.

Blaine woke up the next morning with the sun shining straight into his eyes. He blinked his eyes open, confused. The sun wasn’t usually so high when they got up for work and sessions. He raised his head off the wet pillow and listened for the usual sounds of his love making breakfast, humming along to some tune as plates and cutlery clinked and the sound and smells of cooking food filled his senses. Today there was nothing. No humming, no clinking, no sounds at all. He threw off the covers and wrenched the door open, running down the hall. He stopped at the kitchen and fell to his knees. On the table with their abandoned dinner were a note and a set of keys. He slowly got up and walked over, his tears splashing onto the sheet as he gripped it. Nine words flowed across the page in Kurt’s curvy writing. ‘Blaine. I’m sorry, I can’t do this anymore’. Blaine choked, bile rising into his throat, he just made it to the bathroom before throwing his empty stomach up into the toilet bowl.

Kurt had left, Kurt was gone. He got up on shaky legs and filled the glass on the sink with water, gargled and spat before he stumbled into their room. Some of Kurt’s clothes were gone, his skin and hair products, his case and his copy of their photo album. Blaine clenched his eyes shut and bawled as he slid down the wall, drawing his knees up to his face as he cried long and hard for his love and the mistakes they’d made.

Cooper found him three hours later, curled up against the wall, half asleep. “Blaine?” He asked softly, his fingers smoothing over Blaine’s curls. “What’s going on? Where’s Kurt?”

Blaine looked up, sheer desolation in his eyes. “He’s gone Coop, he left me.”

“I spoke to him last night.” Cooper said, confused.

Blaine nodded, sniffling. “We had an argument. I was angry he waited ‘til dinner to tell me you were coming back. I told him I didn’t need him, Coop. How could I do that? I do, I do need him. Oh god what have I done?” He wailed and started crying again. Cooper gathered Blaine into his arms and rocked him, he couldn’t answer and he couldn’t believe it.

An hour later Blaine got up off of the floor and walked into the kitchen. Cooper had thrown away their barely touched meal and washed up. The phone was blinking answer phone messages so he pressed play. The first was from Dr Needham, asking if they were ok and that Blaine had missed his session this morning. The second was from Mercedes’ contact that was helping him get his demo to record companies. The third was from Burt, worried about Kurt who’d left a strange message on his phone about not being able to do things anymore. The fourth was from Isabelle saying Kurt hadn’t turned up for work but it was ok, she’d put it down as one of his holiday days. The fifth was from Mercedes, angry and swearing, damning Blaine to whatever hell she could think of. Blaine sighed. He was already in hell. He replied to all of the messages, giving short explanations about Kurt needing to go somewhere which he knew none of them believed. He picked up the phone and called Mercedes.

“Yes?” The diva asked as soon as she picked up the phone.

“Mercedes you probably don’t want to talk to me but please, is Kurt there?” Blaine asked, tears spilling over as Cooper rubbed his back.

“Oh you’d better believe I don’t want to talk to you. No, Kurt isn’t here. He spent last night here, crying. I just dropped him off at LAX. How could you do that after everything Kurt’s done for you?” Mercedes replied.

Blaine’s mouth dropped open and he shoved Cooper’s hand off of his back. “You dropped him off at LAX? You took him to the airport? Who knows where he’s gone.”

Mercedes sighed on the other end. “Calm yo’ hair gel Blaine. He’s not leaving, at least I hope. I dropped him off there so if he wanted to go, he could but he could come back. Either way, you and all those idiots you two call a family need to take some interest in him. He’s not there for everyone to lean on. He’s not there for you to shout at and tell him you don’t need him ‘cos boy, you can’t do any better.”

“I know Mercedes, thank you.” Blaine replied. He hung up and turned into Cooper’s arms and cried against his brother’s chest.

Blaine sighed as his phone rang. Sam’s face flashed on his screen and he pressed end, ignoring the call. A text flashed up a few moments later. ‘Blaine, check Twitter’ was all it read. He opened up Twitter and scrolled to recent messages. Kurt had posted on Twitter a few minutes ago. Blaine’s eyes widened, Kurt was on Twitter. Blaine blinked back tears as he read the man he loved’s tweet.

@K_Hummel Talking in empty room is like shouting against the wind.

Above the tweet came a reply from Puck. @Puckzilla @K_Hummel Dude you need picking up from the side of that precipice?

Blaine watched as Kurt’s reply came a second later. @K_Hummel @Puckzilla Don’t laugh at me Puckerman, you have no idea the night I’ve had #insomuchpain

@Puckzilla @K_Hummel Shit Kurt, I’m on my way. I’m sorry.

Finn’s came next. @FinnHudson @K_Hummel Little bro are you ok? Burt’s worried and so am I. What’s going on?

@K_Hummel @FinnHudson No. I’ll call you.

Blaine logged onto his Twitter and sent a message to Kurt. @BD_Anderson @K_Hummel Baby come home we can talk about this.

Blaine waited for another message or call but it seemed that all tweets had stopped, Puck had probably got to Kurt by now and Kurt and Finn were probably talking. An hour later another tweet flicked up as Blaine refreshed for the millionth time. @Puckzilla @BD_Anderson Dude, you know I’m you guys biggest fan but right now Kurt needs to be just Kurt, ok?

Blaine tapped out a reply, anger flaring through him. @BD_Anderson @Puckzilla You’re not keeping my boyfriend away from me. #kidnappingisillegal

@Puckzilla @BD_Anderson I’m not kidnapping him he walked out. Just give him a few days. #stillmyboy

Blaine threw his phone onto the sofa, angry at himself and his friends. A few days? How was he supposed to survive a few days without the love of his life? Heartbroken blue eyes washed through his mind as he closed his eyes and he took a deep breath. If he had to, he would. He’d do anything for Kurt.