Melt My Heart to Stone
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Melt My Heart to Stone: Say My Name Like There Could Be An Us


T - Words: 5,613 - Last Updated: Aug 10, 2016
Story: Closed - Chapters: 6/? - Created: Feb 10, 2016 - Updated: Feb 10, 2016
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Say My Name Like There Could Be An Us [5]


Kurt was floating. He wasn't sure how. He didn't even understand how it was possible, and yet, he was floating on air. His body was buzzing from excitement and adrenaline and the simple, goofy happiness from a long night out. It was a high he had never reached before and he'd be damned if he would let it end by sleeping.

 

So, he didn't. Instead, he texted his dad that he'd be staying with Blaine for the night and screamed out of the rooftop of the cheesy limo he and his friends had rented together as they drove through the city way past curfew. He went to prom, and he conquered it.

 

Yes, he did have some down moments. The glances throughout the night, the whispers from people across the dance floor, and of course, the announcement of his title as ‘Prom Queen.'

 

It was hard. To be made to look like a fool in front of a sea of people who were mostly already against you in the first place. The silence when his name was spoken was deafening. The drop he felt inside his chest took the breath out of his lungs, and before he knew it, he was breaking into a sprint out of the room where everybody's eyes were watching him.

 

But Blaine was right behind him, stopping Kurt from running away, talking him down, but also listening. Mostly listening. There was a lot of sitting and standing and pacing and ranting before Kurt could finally figure out what he wanted to do. What he needed to do - for not only his but Blaine's sake too. So, he went back in the crowd and accepted his crown. And with a simple phase - and a shit ton of courage - the crowd erupted in cheers and Kurt did nothing but dance the rest of that night away, starting with a dance from Blaine.

 

It was almost half past two when Blaine had finally dragged Kurt into his empty home and up to his room, both of them still giddy from the event. “I can finally check ‘screaming out a limo' off of my bucket list.” Blaine had laughed when they had reached his bedroom, closing the door once Kurt had plopped on to the bed and walking towards his mirror.

 

“If I hadn't done it too, I'd be slightly judging you for having it on your bucket list.” Kurt teased, in which Blaine rolled his eyes and waved the insult away. When he had moved away from his mirror, it was to hold out his hands in presentation to the prom pictures he had stuck up there, a prideful smile on his face. “I love those pictures. God, it was so much fun playing couple with you.” Kurt laughed.

 

“Very true, Kurt Hummel,” Blaine smiled, walking over to Kurt and holding out his hand. “But the night is not over yet.”

 

“I'm pretty sure the night was over two hours ago.” Kurt joked once again, but took Blaine's hand anyway, allowing him to lead them to the center of his bedroom floor, one hand going to Blaine's shoulder as Blaine's wrapped around Kurt's waist, pulling him closer.

 

“Just because you have a crown now doesn't mean you have to be so rude.” Blaine snarled back. Kurt opened his mouth to object but was quickly cut off by Blaine shushing him, moving in even closer so his head could rest on Kurt's shoulder as he began to sing out a slow melody for them to dance to.

 

Fly me to the moon... and let me play amongst the stars. Let me see what spring is like on Jupiter... and Mars.”

 

Kurt remained silent just as Blaine had wanted, closing his eyes as he listened to Blaine sing to him, swaying in his arms. The hand that was holding to Kurt's released and instead, lied flat against the small of Kurt's back. And just like that, Kurt was floating again.

 

He was swaying with Blaine over the floorboards in an aura that made him feel like time had stopped for a while just to keep this moment infinite. Just for a while - for the two of them.

 

Blaine continued to serenade Kurt, occasionally pulling back to meet Kurt's gaze and Kurt opening his eyes to meet Blaine's, the words he sung becoming softer over the lyrics that mentioned ‘adore' and ‘kiss' and ‘I love you.' When the song had finished, they continued to dance slowly, simply enjoying the warmth of each other as Blaine let out a slight sudden laugh, sighing softly.

 

“What?” Kurt asked, laughing at Blaine's outburst.

 

“I've always wanted to meet royalty. Now I'm dancing with royalty.” Blaine spoke, his lips forming into a sweet smile as the continued to dance. “His majesty: my Kurt.” he added for emphasis, another soft laugh coming out.

 

Your Kurt?”

 

Blaine paused as he thought about the words he had said before blushing and ducking his head. “You know what I mean...” he mumbled.

 

“No, I don't.” Kurt teased further, earning a darker blush from Blaine and a slight nervous laugh.

 

“Kurt...” he stumbled, his eyes meeting Kurt's when he looked back up, but not fully to the playfulness he was receiving before.

 

“Blaine.”

 

Just tell him. Just tell him. Just tell him.

 

The thoughts were repeating so quickly in Kurt's mind that they were basically overlapping. His heart was beating hard with nerves and adrenaline and excitement from what would happen if he did. From the way Blaine was staring into his eyes; how Blaine was pressing close to him that Kurt could feel Blaine's soft breath on his cheek. He could feel Blaine's pulse speed up as quick as his. He could see Blaine's eyes drift down his face until they settled on Kurt's lips. They stared - stared hard and long, different from the people staring at Kurt earlier that night. Oh, so very different. Suddenly Blaine was leaning in.

 

The ringing of Blaine's cell phone broke the silence in the room, making Blaine jump back with a slight gasp and Kurt drop from the high he was in. “Jeremiah,” Blaine spoke in a rasp before clearing his throat once he pulled out his phone and read the ID. “I have to... I gotta, um-”

 

“Go.” Kurt spoke, forcing a smile and a dry laugh as he waved Blaine away. “I'm gonna change for bed.”

 

“...Okay.” Blaine responded. He hesitated in his place, his weight shifting to each foot as he watched Kurt, waiting for him to say something, but Kurt had nothing. There was nothing he could say. “I'll just be outside.”

 

“Alright.” Kurt nodded.

 

Blaine nodded back before turning and answering his phone, a smile forced onto his face as he began to speak on his way out of the room. “Jeremiah! No, I was just thinking about you. Yeah, I miss you too-”

 

The moment Blaine had closed the door, Kurt's composure broke. His posture slouched, his face crumbled, and suddenly, his heart broke. It shouldn't have. What was he even thinking? Blaine was never his to begin with. He was with Jeremiah, and this... this entire night was just an illusion anyway. Just pretend.

 

...But Blaine leaned in. He gave soft words, and he sung sweetly in Kurt's ear, and he claimed Kurt as his Kurt. There was something between them, whether that was from the illusion or not, there was something there. Kurt wasn't the only one who felt it. He couldn't have been.

 

Kurt let out a shaky breath, rubbing a hand through his hair as he turned in the room that suddenly felt so unfamiliar to him. When he had finally found the pajamas he always kept over Blaine's, he quickly stripped off his tux and put them on, subconsciously dragging his body to turn off the light and climb into his side of the bed.

 

The dizzying swirling sensation Kurt was feeling earlier had quickly dropped down to a numb, static feeling as he lied in bed alone, staring into the darkness. He couldn't force his eyes close; the previous scene just replaying in his mind. He had so many questions when he closed his eyes. So many thoughts. It was all too much.

 

Blaine walked back into his room - ten, twenty minutes later; Kurt didn't really know - and paused before he closed the door back. There was a bit of rustling, and Kurt could only assume that Blaine was changing in the dark, trying his best not to disturb Kurt in the case that he was already asleep. It didn't take long before Blaine was climbing into bed next to Kurt, their backs to each other, close but never touching.

 

Then there was silence.

 

Every now and then, there would be the faint sound of a car passing, the on and off patter of a slight rain, Blaine's soft breathes as a dusk, spring breeze blew through the window. Suddenly the hum of overlapping words returned to Kurt's mind, louder and louder. He couldn't continue the next morning, acting if nothing had ever happened. He couldn't move on again, wondering what if's. Wondering if Blaine felt the same way he did somewhere in him. Wondering if Blaine wanted to kiss Kurt as much as he so badly wanted to kiss him.

 

He couldn't wait till morning, where things would be different. Where their hidden layers of courage and honesty and vulnerability around each other would disappear to only leave... “just friends.”

 

Kurt shifted on his side of the bed. Seconds later, Blaine shifted also. He was awake. Kurt sighed into the midnight air. He couldn't sleep unless he said something. Asked. Kurt squeezed his eyes closed and took another breath before counting down in his head.

 

Just tell him. Just tell him. Just tell him.... 3.... 2...

 

“Blaine-?”

 

“Kurt-?”

 

They both turned in the bed to face each other, pausing in surprise when they spoke at the same time. It was Blaine who broke the silence with a sheepish laugh. “Sorry, you can go.” He spoke politely.

 

“No, you can go first.” Kurt responded quietly. Blaine rubbed a hand over his face before adjusting in the bed once again, lying on his back and staring up at the ceiling. In the darkness, Kurt was still able to make out Blaine's lip being chewed between his top and bottom row of teeth, the crease above his nose in between his eyebrows, the contradiction of softness and concentration on his face. He was nervous.

 

Kurt slid closer to Blaine under the sheet, his hand reaching out to grab Blaine's before he also lied on his back. “Tell me.” He encouraged, squeezing Blaine's hand gently. Blaine's head turned to face Kurt, a soft sigh coming out of his mouth before he smiled at him, blinking a few times.

 

“Thank you,” He spoke finally. “For allowing to face my fears. Fight my demons.”

 

The praise took Kurt aback for a moment. He shifted slowly, turning on his side until he was fully facing Blaine, speaking softly to the boy that was once again inches away from him. “That was all you. You don't need to thank me for that.”

 

“You were still there for me. I wouldn't have been able to do it without you, and... I hadn't realized how much I needed to.”

 

Kurt smiled softly, adjusting until he was able to lie his head on Blaine's shoulder, Blaine shifting until he was in the position to pull Kurt closer and hold him. “I suppose I can thank you for the same thing.”

 

“It was my honor.” Blaine responded. It was quiet once again after that, but a content quiet now. There was still the hard thumping in Kurt's chest to ask the question he had originally spoke up about in the first place, but it was quickly stilled when Kurt felt Blaine place a gentle kiss to the top of Kurt's forehead.

 

In that moment, that was enough. Kurt knew that this topic would come up once again later in their relationship. Knew that he couldn't continue pretending that he didn't have feelings for Blaine, and that he'd have to admit to it for his sake of not holding on to a secret on anymore so he could move on. But for now, he was safe in Blaine's arms after a long, beautiful night of calling Blaine's his, and everything in that moment was an infinite perception of perfection.

 

They fell asleep seconds after closing their eyes; close and warm under the late spring breeze.

 

 


 

 

Sunday nights were strange to Kurt. They always felt short and boring, simply a countdown to when he'd have to get ready for school the next day. Today, though, was different.

 

Kurt couldn't focus. It was 7 pm. By this time, Kurt would be finishing any last minute homework he had put off over the weekend and then picking out an outfit for Monday while he waited for dinner to finish. And he had fully intended to; books and paper sprawled out around him on his bed, but instead of actually looking at them, Kurt instead stared into the distance, the quiet sound of his teeth biting down on the little nail he had left on his thumb.

 

He couldn't stop thinking about Blaine.

 

The night of his prom would not stop replaying in his head, every detail fading a bit every time he tried to remember it except for that dance in Blaine's room, alone and safe in the universe. That he remembered every single millisecond of.

 

It was almost frustrating how much he continued to think about the situation. It would distract his mind every other minute, even when he tried not to think of it, yet there was Blaine's eyes and hair and lips in his head, looking at him like he was the best thing in the world. “I'm going insane...” Kurt groaned to himself, smacking his hands on to his face and lying back onto the piles of papers, successfully wrinkling them.

 

He had to stop thinking about Blaine. His life didn't revolve around him. He needed to focus on the things that were in front of him now. That's what was important.

 

Kurt stood from his undone work, obviously needing a break to clear his head before he could actually get anything done. As he left his room for the kitchen, a knock at the front door made him pause before Burt called that he'd get. Kurt nodded in response, digging into the fridge and pulling out a yogurt, holding it in front of him as he tried to decide if he wanted it or not.

 

Just as he put the cup back to grab another flavor, Burt called Kurt, the sound of the front door closing behind him. “Yeah?” Kurt responded, closing the refrigerator door with empty hands before following the sound of his father's voice.

 

The sight of Blaine caught him off guard when he had finally reached the doorway. He was disheveled, eyes puffy from what seemed like crying, arms wrapped tight around himself - different from the Blaine Kurt couldn't stop thinking of. “Hey...” Blaine spoke with a slight rasp in his voice, taking a step towards Kurt as he tried to smile but his eyes simply watered more. “I'm sorry I didn't call first-”

 

“Don't be.” Kurt spoke sternly, his face filled with concern. “What's wrong?” He asked, looking between Blaine and Burt, imagining the worst and hoping it wasn't any of the scenarios in his head.

 

“Can we talk upstairs?” Blaine asked quietly, looking down at his feet as he sniffed softly.

 

Kurt nodded, walking with Blaine up the stairs into his bedroom. When he closed the door, Blaine was silent, sitting on Kurt's bed with his eyes staring down into the floor. Kurt slowly walked over to him, sitting beside him and waiting patiently for Blaine to speak, the silence doing nothing but building up Kurt's worries as to what was hurting him..

 

“Jeremiah cheated on me.” Blaine spoke suddenly, voice quiet and broken. There was another silence as Kurt tried to take in the words, wanting to say something helpful or comforting but not finding anything.

 

“Blaine... I'm so sorry,”

 

“How could I have been so stupid.” Blaine spoke up again, more to himself than to Kurt as he brought his hands up to his face to wipe away the slow tears that were falling. Kurt almost couldn't take it - seeing the pain on Blaine's face, in his voice, in every word he spoke. He was heartbroken.

 

“You're not stupid,” Kurt immediately protested, wrapping an arm around Blaine's shoulders and pulling him closer to him for comfort. “Jeremiah's the idiot, don't beat yourself up for his mistakes.”

 

Blaine embraced the hug quickly, leaning into Kurt and wrapping his arms around him as he started to let out harder sobs, releasing everything that was built up inside of him. “I should've known better.” He spoke between the cries, a small trembling as he tried to breathe to calm himself enough to speak. “I should've known, but I didn't. I ignored all the signs because I was so in love... He never loved me.”

 

The last admission broke in Blaine's voice, doing nothing but forcing him to cry even more. Kurt wasn't used to having Blaine this vulnerable. They had been sad with each other plenty of times, took turns in comforting, but pain like this wasn't often seen between them; both too concerned in trying to be each other's hero. To break down on Kurt's shoulder like this, Jeremiah must've meant a lot more to Blaine than Kurt had realized - or tried to pretend he didn't realize, at least.

 

Therefore, with every tear that landed on his shoulder, Kurt couldn't help but feel guilty for the situation. He had overestimated how faithful Jeremiah would be. Underestimated Blaine's love for him. He should've told Blaine in the beginning; it would've saved him from the pain he was feeling now. Blaine was never supposed to get hurt in the end. He didn't deserve this.

 

It wasn't until Blaine began to calm again that Kurt spoke up, knowing it was either now or never and Blaine deserved to know the truth. “Blaine, I need to tell you something.” He started as Blaine stood and reached for Kurt's box of tissues, wiping his cheeks and nose before throwing them away and sitting back down. “I knew... about Jeremiah.”

 

Kurt braced himself for Blaine's response - for him to get angry and scream or walk out or something, but he was met with silence once again. Blaine just stared at the floor once more, but the hurt and confusion was obvious on his face. The exact face Kurt was trying to avoid. Blaine closed his eyes, a hand coming over his mouth as he tried to process. “You knew.” He repeated in a whisper, slightly turning away from Kurt.

 

“I'm so sorry, I should've said something earlier. He was flirting with someone else, and I wasn't sure so I confronted him but I didn't say anything to you. And I wanted to tell you so many times, but I was scared you wouldn't believe me, or that you'd get hurt, especially after we had that fight, but I never intended for this to happen. I'm so sorry, Blaine-”

 

“Stop.” Blaine spoke over Kurt's rant, cutting him mid-apology.

 

Defeat. After all the stages of pain Blaine was going through, the only emotion that was evident on his face now was defeat. Kurt wanted to wrap him in his arms again, hold him until he was able to smile, but he didn't know if he could anymore. If Blaine would let him. “It's not your fault.” Blaine spoke again, much to Kurt's surprise. “You're right. I probably wouldn't have believed you. Because I didn't want to. I wanted him to feel the same way I did.”

 

“Blaine, it's not your fault either.” Kurt reminded. Blaine simply scoffed at himself and shook his head, reaching for another tissue and wiping under his eyes. “Look at me.” He commanded. When Blaine hesitated, Kurt took Blaine's hands in his, forcing Blaine to face him and waited until he looked up to meet Kurt's eyes.

 

“If I would've just gave him what he wanted-”

 

“Nothing would've changed.”

 

“Kurt-”

 

“Nothing, Blaine.”

 

“How do you know? All I did was stay mad and bitter with him. I didn't even try to compromise, I was horrible boyfriend.”

 

“No you weren't. Things would've been worse because Jeremiah will never be good enough to appreciate you. You were an amazing boyfriend, you put yourself out on the limb for him every day and you can't blame yourself for the things he did. You deserve so much more than him because you're... perfect. You're the most courageous, kindest, perfect person I've ever met and anyone would be lucky to even be in your life, let alone have the slightest bit of love from you. I just wish... I...”

 

Kurt choked. His words suddenly became trapped in his throat, wanting to coming out but not being able to. Not when Blaine was staring at him like that, hanging onto each one he was saying. Not when his eyes were watering with more than just the pain of being betrayed, and he was looking at Kurt with more than a ‘thanks for being my friend' kind of look.

 

But why not? If not now, when?

 

“Kurt...” Blaine spoke, searching Kurt's eyes, his own asking Kurt to continue- pleading for Kurt to continue. Suddenly Kurt's heart was racing. He had prepared this speech over and over in his mind, but none of those words seemed good enough now that this moment was actually happening. He opened his mouth to speak, taking a deep breath as he prepared to admit it.

 

Then, it happened. It happened so quickly that Kurt couldn't even process it at first, but suddenly Blaine's hands were cupping Kurt's cheeks, pulling him close until finally their lips were together. Kurt inhaled sharply through his nose, the action knocking the air out of his lungs as his body stiffened in surprise, but then, just as suddenly, melted in Blaine's hands.

 

Kurt kissed back hard, his hands gripping onto the material of Blaine's shirt, drowning in a kiss that was long overdue. He felt numb yet overwhelmed at the same time. He finally understood the cliche behind fireworks that he saw in so many movies. This was fireworks.

 

His lips followed Blaine's movements until he was struggling onto his last breath of air. Even then, he waited until Blaine pulled away slightly, just enough for both of them to breathe before he was diving back in as if he couldn't wait any longer. Blaine's teeth pulled at Kurt's bottom lip until he happily opened his mouth, deepening the kiss more. A soft accidental whine released from Kurt's mouth once he felt Blaine's tongue brush against his, which only provoked a low moan from Blaine that honestly shouldn't have been as attractive as it was, but god, it was. Blaine shifted in his seat, closer to Kurt, before pulling away slowly, Kurt's lips slowly lingering after his.

 

Blaine's mouth moved to Kurt's jaw, kissing down until he was laying wet kisses on Kurt's neck, causing Kurt's breaths to become soft and shallow in the room.  The swirling sensation was back in Kurt's head, in his chest, in every spot Blaine kissed or touched, heating up his entire body. “Is this okay?” Blaine spoke suddenly in a low rasp close to Kurt's ear which had him shifting in his spot on the bed.

 

Kurt was nodding before he had even fully thought of an answer, his body reacting before his mind ever could. Blaine was pressing his mouth against Kurt's once again, the complex movements of their lips together almost becoming too much for Kurt. He knew they needed to stop soon. They needed to break, and talk, and figure things out and fully admit to each other how they felt but it was so hard to pull away when Blaine was kissing him so passionately with his hands tangled in Kurt's hair in a moment that seemed too good to be true. How was he supposed to pull away?

 

There was a quick knock at Kurt's door before it was being pushed open, both of the boys jumping back from each other in shock as they tried to compose themselves. “Sorry, Blaine, I just need to know if you're-” Burt's voice started when he opened the door before cutting himself off when he saw the two, raising a suspicious eyebrow. “Staying...” He finished after a moment of looking between them.

 

Kurt could feel the redness on his face as he tried to calm his speeding heart, ducking his head as he gulped down air he hadn't realized he was needing. Of course. Of course this would happen out of all things to happen during such a perfect moment. “I um... I was just leaving, actually.” Blaine mumbled embarrassed from being caught as he stood, ducking his head as well.

 

“Blaine, you don't have to-”

 

“No, I think Blaine should get home. It's been a long night.” Burt agreed, throwing a look at Kurt that forced him to hunch in defeat.

 

Kurt could only nod with a sigh. There was no way he could argue against Burt about this, even if Kurt's intentions for having Blaine stay were pure. He didn't want Blaine being alone going through the emotional roller coaster he was having. His selfish thoughts of having Blaine stay just to continue kissing him all night was surprisingly the last thing on his list of intentions - though, it was a short list to be fair. “I'll walk you out.”

 

Kurt stood from the bed and led Blaine down the stairs after he gave an awkward ‘goodnight' to Burt. Burt had been kind enough to not follow them down and let them have a private goodbye, but Kurt knew he had a lecture waiting for him once Blaine was out the door.

 

“So...” Blaine spoke bashfully when he reached the front.

 

“So...” Kurt replied.

 

There was a silence that Kurt hadn't expected. It was uncomfortable, Kurt waiting for Blaine to say or do something just to break it. Then Blaine leaned in, but it wasn't a kiss. Instead it was a hug; strong and tight, that ended with Blaine's hand rubbing Kurt's back and then giving him a masculine pat on the shoulder. It was even worse than the silence.

 

“I'll call you later.” Blaine spoke again when they pulled away. “I have a lot to think about.”

 

“Of course.” Kurt responded with an exaggerated smile. “Take all the time you need.”

 

“Thanks.” And just like that, Blaine was gone, leaving an awkward, anticlimactic moment behind him. Kurt watched as he walked down their pathway into his car and drove off as if he hadn't just given Kurt the best, mind-blowing first kiss known to man minutes ago. As if the feeling of each other's lips weren't still warm and buzzing, lingering there on one another.

 

Minutes passed and Kurt was still standing in the doorway, frozen and staring at the spot where Blaine once was. It wasn't until he heard the stomps of his father coming down the stairs that he finally pulled himself inside of the house and closed the door, rolling his eyes at the speech he was about to receive and was in no mood to hear.

 

“Listen, if you're just going to lecture me about me and Blaine kissing on my bed, just know that nothing was going to happen between us. It just suddenly happened, we're not like that and he just broke up with Jeremiah so Im pretty sure that wasnt on his mind.” Kurt tried to quickly explain when he was met with Burt, arms crossed over his chest and a quizzical look on his face.

 

“Okay...” he spoke, nodding and accepting Kurt's explanation. “Just as long as you're being safe. And I don't just mean sex wise. You know I've been rooting for you two ever since you told me you had feelings for the kid, but admitting your feelings while he's vulnerable like that is dangerous. I don't want you getting hurt.”

 

“Why would I get hurt?” Kurt scoffed. “Blaine cares for me as much as I care for him.”

 

“I'm sure he does. Just...  make sure this whole things isn't happening for the wrong reasons.” Burt explained further. Kurt paused, realizing what he was trying to say - shocked and almost appalled by the suggestion of him being a rebound. But the more he thought about it, the harder it was to fight the idea, despite how much he didn't want to believe it.

 

“Blaine would never do that to me.” Kurt spoke, shaking his head.

 

“He would never intentionally do that to you.  But sometimes when we're emotional, we make quick decisions at the wrong time. Just be careful, kid.”

 

Kurt headed to bed after that, but he wasn't able to get much sleep. He cleared off his mattress, turned off his light, but his eyes remained open, staring at the ceiling as his mind continued to shout at him. The feeling was repetitive: being stuck alone and having Blaine's actions occupy his mind. They just needed to talk. Once they did, everything would be alright.

 

Everything would be fine.

 


 

 

The next days were simply another round of the waiting game. Blaine had said that he'd call and despite Kurt encouraging him to take time, he didn't really mean four days of absolute silence. The entire ordeal had Kurt feeling anxious. If he thought he was struggling to focus before, he obviously didn't know what was in store for him.

 

Like any person going through relationship (or lack thereof) problems, he talked about it with his friends. He couldn't stop talking about it. He just couldn't understand.

 

Their kiss wasn't anything less than magical. He obviously didn't know how Blaine felt about it, but it had to be good. He kissed Kurt after all. Kissed him like he never wanted to stop kissing him. Kissed his neck and his jawline and stopped to make sure they were both comfortable before he kissed him again like there was no tomorrow. People don't just kiss anyone like that.

 

It was in the middle of rehearsal that Blaine had finally messaged Kurt. It wasn't a call, but it was something - an apology for not speaking and a proposal to make it up through coffee with the conclusion of “I really want to talk about us.”

 

The thought of an ‘us' had Kurt's heart skipping a beat when it really shouldn't have. He shouldn't be looking into anything yet, but... us. Kurt loved the sound of it. The future it could imply. He had no choice but to happily accept.

 

Kurt was the first one at the Lima Bean, sitting and waiting for Blaine to arrive. He had ordered both coffees already as he usually did when he came first, but as time passed, he worried if he should've waited this time, beginning to see less steam appearing from Blaine's cup on the opposite side of the table.

 

Blaine was late. Not abnormally late, but late nonetheless. Kurt had practiced what he was going to say in his head a thousand times, had picked up and put down his phone even more, and when he had caught himself counting the random things in the shop, he started to wonder if Blaine was going to show up at all.

 

The clocked ticked by another five minutes. Then another ten. Kurt swore he could feel something in him break with every extra minute, but he ignored it, holding on to any bit of hope he could muster. Blaine was coming. He wouldn't leave Kurt here like this. He just wouldn't.

 

He checked his phone again but there was still nothing from Blaine. Suddenly, Kurt's giddy nervousness from what he and Blaine would discuss turned into an anxiety. He had been scared before from just receiving an answer to if Blaine wanted the same things Kurt did, but the thought of this being the answer in itself was just devastating.

 

Kurt blinked a few times as he looked up at the ceiling and let out a small sigh. Another group of ticking from the clock that showed that Kurt had been waiting for Blaine for exactly an hour. And still nothing.

 

There it was: the pain and disappointment that Kurt was trying so hard to pretend wasn't there. That there was no way Blaine could hurt him again. Not after everything. Out of all the people to hurt him, just not him.

 

Kurt stood quickly, forcing himself to not cry as he collected his things. Just as he stood, the jingle of the door opening rung and he quickly turned his head, hoping it was Blaine coming through, ready to apologize and admit that he cared for Kurt just as much as Kurt cared for him. But it wasn't him.

 

The tears fell the moment Kurt was in his car. He must've looked like an idiot in that shop alone, sitting and waiting for something that could never come. Blaine could never feel the same way he did. No matter how much Kurt could love Blaine, Blaine would never love him back in that way.


Kurt was heartbroken.


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