Aug. 10, 2016, 7 p.m.
Melt My Heart to Stone: Forever Excusing Your Intentions
T - Words: 6,903 - Last Updated: Aug 10, 2016 Story: Closed - Chapters: 6/? - Created: Feb 10, 2016 - Updated: Feb 10, 2016 203 0 0 0 0
Forever Excusing Your Intentions [3]
The entire process of leaving Dalton had been extremely awkward. Avoiding Blaine, though, was the hardest part of the entire thing. That was what made the transition awkward.
There was no doubt that Blaine was one of the most popular - if not the most popular person at Dalton. Most of Kurts friends he had met through Blaine, and after their very public heated discussion, most were either choosing sides, sharing their time between the two, or just there to try and figure out the details, which Kurt did not discuss. With them, at least.
It wasnt soon after the debate that Kurt had called up his Mckinley friends to not only let them know the news of returning, but to also vent to them about what had happen. It was a short and painful talk over the phone that lead to his females friends coming over abruptly later that night to console and swear to have Blaines head on a stick for hurting Kurt, letting Kurt know that he made the right choice in coming back.
Kurt had already told the Warblers his choice in leaving the school the day Pavarotti died, which they had been upset about, of course, but supported Kurt nonetheless. He had never told Blaine, though. He hadnt talked to him after the fight, and he figured that the news would get around to him through his friends. He knew it wasnt fair to the boy he used to call his best friend, but Blaine lost all rights to fairness from Kurt the moment he decided Kurt wasnt a friend at all. It just saved him the heartache to think he wouldnt have to be the one to tell him.
He hated to say that he stayed up later than he had liked thinking about his decision to not tell Blaine, but avoiding him rescued Kurt from confrontation that he wasnt ready to have. They still had class and Warbler meetings, so it wasnt that easy to avoid seeing him, especially with the competition so close, but he did what he could, making sure he kept a straight face around him.
He avoided looking towards Blaine, even when he felt his eyes on him, and when things were finished, he was almost always the first one out the door, making sure Blaine couldnt speak to him even if he wanted to. He abandoned the little places in Dalton he knew they both liked to reside, figuring it was only right to give it up with him leaving in a week. He even stopped having lunch there all together; instead going out to eat, usually with friends.
It made things easier that way, distracting himself from all the tension at Dalton. It had been with Rachel after a few days of getting lunch out that Kurt had finally opened up about the whole debacle again, explaining how unsettling the entire thing was over a cup of coffee.
"So, now youre doing the same thing to him, with all the ignoring and being upset?" she piped in after Kurt had finished speaking, taking a sip of her coffee as she waited for him to answer.
"Its different. I have an actual reason to be upset with him. And its not like hes actively seeking me out like I was for him. Hes doesnt even seem to care. And if he did, hes doing a poor job at showing it." Rachel nodded, chewing down at her bottom lip in silence. For any other person, this couldve been a natural response, but knowing Rachel Berry - the person who had an opinion on everything, this was weird. "What?" Kurt questioned after a while with a sigh.
"Ive just... Ive always liked Blaine." Rachel spoke, slightly cowering at the end of the sentence as she got the face she expected from Kurt.
"Well, so did I, Rachel. I didnt exactly ask for a reason to be angry with him." Kurt snapped, brows furrowing in disbelief that that was her defense.
"I know, Im not saying you were," Rachel spoke quickly. Kurt slumped back in his seat with a roll of his eyes as he crossed his arms and waited for her to continue. "It just doesnt seem right for you guys to just be going your separate ways after this. Without even working it out."
"He hasnt even tried to apologize, Rachel."
"And you dont seem that keen on accepting that apology when he does." Rachel reminded, making Kurt huff in defeat. It was a moment before Rachel started speaking again, waiting for Kurt to return her gaze. "Im not saying that you need to forgive him right away. Just that when he does apologize - and he will," Rachel quickly worked in an additional part of her sentence, already seeing Kurt prepare to question if Blaine was going to apologize at all. "That you at least hear what he has to say."
Kurt shook his head softly, looking down at his hands. "You dont know what he said to me, Rachel. How he said it. He put me and Jeremiah up against each other and just picked him like I never meant anything to him. How am I supposed to listen to him?"
A warm hand was suddenly on Kurts, and he looked up when Rachel gave it a squeeze of reassurance. "Stupid people do stupid things when theyre scared." Kurt nodded at Rachels words and with that they didnt speak of the topic for the rest of their break.
Kurt had found himself back at Dalton before his lunch break was even over after Rachel had to go for a sudden emergency New Directions meeting. She kissed him on the cheek and wished him luck and then here he was, walking through semi empty hallways on a trail to his locker to get his books before rehearsal. It wasnt until he had saw his familiar short Dalton boy waiting for him there that he wondered if Rachels whole "hear him out" speech was actually planned, quickly turned on his heel, and realizing he could survive without going to his locker today.
"Kurt!" Blaine quickly called out upon seeing him, running up to him and stopping Kurt before he could actually make any distance between them. "Please wait, I need to talk to you."
"I need to go, I left my phone somewhere." Kurt quickly excused himself starting to walk away before Blaine stopped him again.
"Kurt, your phone is in you hand..." he sighed lamely.
"Oh, well, would you look at that?"
"Kurt please, just-" Blaine cut himself off, face scrunching up in anguish, and for a moment, Kurt had the instinct to lean into Blaine and hug him. To tell him that things were okay like he had so many times before. But he didnt. Even then though, his feet wouldnt let him walk away, and he waited patiently for Blaine to speak. "Youre leaving Dalton."
It wasnt a question, just a statement, but Kurt nodded his head anyway in verification, watching Blaine swallow hard and lose his words. "If thats all, then Id really to leave now." Kurt mumbled before Blaine shook his head quickly.
"Its not, I swear, Im just..." Blaine let out a breath, looking around them in a way of trying to avert his eyes from Kurts gaze, and Kurt knew exactly why. "I didnt think you were going to leave." he spoke, voice wavering, and god, Kurt hoped Blaine wasnt doing what he thought Blaine was doing. "You said you loved it here. That it was better than Mckinley and that you were safe here and... the Warblers are going to be devastated-"
"I think the Warblers are going to be perfectly fine without me, Blaine."
"Theyre not." Blaine piped in, and then Kurt could see it. The unshed tears that Blaine was trying to hide in his eyes. "Kurt, theyre not."
Kurt paused, licking his suddenly dry lips as he tried to gather his words. "Well, what do you want me to say Blaine? Im not happy here. Not anymore, and... the Warblers cant keep me trapped here for them to just throw away and expect to come back."
"Thats not what theyre doing. Thats not what they meant to do, Kurt." Blaine pleaded as Kurt scoffed, rolling his eyes.
"Well, maybe the Warblers can tell me that for themselves." Kurt was ready to walk away, but Blaine was quick to hold him back again, speaking before Kurt could protest.
"Kurt, I - Im sorry. Im so sorry. I dont expect you to forgive me, because... I dont deserve your forgiveness. Youre right, Ive been terrible to you. I only thought about myself and my problems, and I took it out on you. But Im so sorry. For screaming and saying those things that I said, and doing all of that stuff to you that you didnt deserve. And Im... Im so devastated that youre leaving because I cant remember what Dalton was even like without you, and if youre leaving because of me then... God Kurt, Im so sorry. Please just know that Im sorry and that I never meant to hurt you."
Kurt was silent for a long time, taking in the entire apology, holding on to every word. He took a breath, trying his best to stay composed as he looked at Blaine - which was harder than it had been before - and asked, "Is that all?"
The look on Blaines face was enough to make Kurt want to give in. To let his guard down for a moment and stop being mad because they both were hurting, and what good was this doing? Why was he doing this?
Blaines hand let go of Kurt as he looked down at his feet. He found himself not even being able to speak, simply nodding at Kurts question as he wiped his hands over his face quickly, mouth forming a tight line on his face. "Thank you for apologizing." Kurt said lowly.
Blaine sniffed softly, looking back up at Kurt and nodded once more. There was an awkward beat between the two before Blaine was turning, walking in the opposite direction. Kurt bit into his cheek, his eyes squeezing shut for a moment as he tried to think, but couldnt. His head was spinning with the thousands of thoughts in there, and his chest was tight from the constant tugging Blaine had done. Why did he always do that?
He knew he just wanted the conversation to be over, and he was so relieved when Blaine had finally ended it, and yet, he couldnt stop himself. As much as he wanted to walk away and tell Rachel he tried but simply couldnt work it out, he knew that he wanted to, and the words came stumbling out as if he couldnt leave that spot until Blaine knew. "Im not leaving because of you!"
Blaine stopped. Kurt questioned if Blaine was going to ever turn around as he waited, but Blaine did, and if Kurt thought he was relieved before then this was an entirely new high of alleviation. "Then why are you?"
"Like I said, Im not happy here. I feel trapped. I miss being myself and having friends."
"You have friends here." Blaine protested.
"Its not the same. You and I both know that." Blaine was silent again, but it was a calming silence this time. One that assured Kurt that Blaine knew what he meant and wasnt going to argue further on that topic. "But you were right. I did love it here. Its so much better in comparison to Mckinley. Everyone was nice, and I felt so safe here, but... well, Ive never exactly been one to sacrifice my freedom for safety, and I just feel trapped here. I think I always have, I just wished I didnt."
"I wish you didnt either." Came a mumble from Blaine. There was another hesitant silence before Kurt let out a sigh, looking around them and taking a few steps closer to Blaine.
"That doesnt mean Im not going to miss it here," he claimed, smiling softly to himself. "Dalton was like another home to me, and I looked forward to coming here every day. How can I not be sad about leaving? I met my best friend here..." The words caught Blaines attention, his expression softening, a flash of hope as he waited for Kurt to continue. "Pavarotti, I meant." Kurt quickly added in.
And then, there was a booming laugh, cutting straight through the tension. It was so genuine and full of content and relief; a laugh that one could only hear from a joke as dumb as the ones Kurt would tell, but somehow always made Blaine laugh. It was thrilling the affects the sound had on Kurt, a sound he felt like he hadnt heard in a very long time. The way it was contagious and made Kurt burst out laughing also, the way it made his smile spread a little too brightly for a joke based on a dead bird - may he rest in peace.
The way it spread through Kurt until he was feeling lighter. The way it made Kurts heart do its tiny thumping dance in his chest that was only reserved for two things: his New York City daydreams, and Blaine Anderson. The way it made his feet move closer to Blaine, and Blaines feet move closer to him as they finished their fit of giggles, smiling widely at each other. The way it made Kurt want this feud to be all over.
Blaine calmed his laughter, giving Kurt a look that so clearly said Im going to miss you. Kurt didnt need him to say it, because he knew. After being by someones side every day, Kurt just knew, and he was positive Blaine could read the look on his face just as well. "I know that you may still be upset with me, which I understand completely," Blaine started, clearing his throat softly as Kurt waited. "But would it be overstepping if I asked for a hug right now?"
"Yeah, it would." Kurt answered, nodding. Blaine was barely able to get disappointed before Kurt was talking again, keeping his eyes on him. "But Id be lying if I said I didnt want to hug you back."
Blaines arms were around him, strong and tight, but not in an uncomfortable way. Just tight enough to show how much Blaine had missed his best friend as much as Kurt had. Kurt wrapped his arms around Blaines torso, closing his eyes and enjoying the embrace. Only did they pull back when Blaine questioned Kurt, just enough so they could make eye contact. "What about Karofsky?"
"He shouldnt be a problem anymore. He wants to try and turn over a new leaf." Kurt repeated his fathers words. The skepticism on Blaines face was laughable, and Kurt couldnt help but pull Blaine back in for another hug, letting out a few more chuckles.
After a while, Blaine questioned Kurt again, this time not breaking the hug. "What about us?" It was a soft, sad question, and Kurt couldnt have admitted that he hadnt thought about it, because he had. He had avoided the thought just as he had avoided Blaine before, but there was no way of avoiding it now.
Kurt choked on his words so instead he just hugged Blaine tighter, and Blaine had no problem with doing the same. He bit his lip as he thought, mumbling words into Blaines shoulder that he hoped would be enough.
"Im never saying goodbye to you."
The next few days had passed in an exciting blur for Kurt. After making up with Blaine, it was as if all of fate was in his favor and things were finally looking up for him in the best ways. Immediately after his and Blaines discussion in the hall, Blaine hadnt waste any time making it up to Kurt. Later that day, he had announced that he had wanted to do a duet with Kurt as a parting gift, and as a way of "showing the world true unacknowledged talent." The Warblers took a vote and it had been decided that they would duet for Regionals. It was the first time Kurt had found himself performing a solid part in front of a large audience that werent just his friends and family.
He had been excruciatingly nervous. Even as he approached the spotlight that night, he had felt an insincere twist in his stomach, though he had succeeded in not showing it. Despite the constant fear that he wasnt going to, he had remembered all of his words and routines, though. And he had done it well.
Despite finding out that the Warblers had lost Regionals later that night, Kurt was still genuinely proud of himself for the performance he was able to give, and he knew his teammates were as well. They celebrated together in spite of their loss, and cheered to making it as far as they had; all while wishing Kurt a safe trip back to Mckinley.
It was at Pavarottis funeral the next day that Blaine voiced once again how well Kurt had did. Though it was only an attempted distraction to help Kurt from reminding himself of his mothers funeral - which Kurt silently thanked Blaine for even knowing he needed a distraction - the compliment was still sincere and Kurt appreciated it. They had spent the complete Sunday together, slightly mourning Pavarottis death with hot chocolate and window shopping, while also trying to ignore the sudden fact that Kurt wouldnt be at Dalton the next day.
By the time Kurt was arriving home, it was clear that Blaine had wanted to stay the rest of the night with Kurt, both not realizing the sad truth of not being able to say see you tomorrow until they hesitated at Kurts front door.
Kurt knew by the way Blaine waited for Kurt to invite him in instead of just giving a hug that Blaine wanted to stay. He knew by the way Blaine had lied back on to Kurts pillows instead of just sitting up with crossed legs when Kurt suggested a "quick" movie. He knew by the way Blaine hinted that he was cold by pulling the covers closer until Kurt had no choice but to move in closer to Blaine until they were spooning, his arms around Blaine so he could relish in Kurts hold and body heat.
It had been clear to Kurt because Blaines desire to stay was as strong as Kurt;s desire to have him stay with him. Their emotions were in sync; Kurt was sure Blaine had already texted his parents to let them know he was staying with Kurt before he even walked into Kurts home. So, Blaine stayed the night with Kurt, both too comfortable in being back together to be apart again.
When morning came, Blaine was up and dressed before Kurt was even awake, needing to leave earlier to make it to school on time. He informed Kurt he was leaving in the gentlest way he could think of - knowing Kurt wasnt exactly the kindest person when he was awoken before he needed to be. Blaine rubbed Kurts back gently enough for him to open his eyes and receive the coffee Blaine had made for him, which Kurt gave a drowsy smile to, inhaling the scent before thanking Blaine. He then allowed Kurt to hold him back from leaving for a few minutes so he could awaken himself enough to give Blaine a hug and mumble in his sleepy haze, "This isnt goodbye. Never saying goodbye."
Blaine squeezed Kurt in their hug and mumbled back an, "I know." before giving Kurt a smile and leaving.
The promise was quickly repeated once more to Blaine later that day in a way Kurt had completely unexpected. He had arrived at Mckinley soon after Kurt had returned, and before Kurt knew it, the Warblers were singing in the courtyard.
They were singing to him, some with misty eyes and some not. It was while Kurt had hugged each one of them and heard their farewells that he knew he had to tell Blaine again. As a way of reassurance and a way to thank him, and a way to stop Blaine from thinking whatever thoughts that made him one of those few misty eyed Warblers who were singing a goodbye to him, instead of a see you later. So when the song was finally finished and Kurt was wrapped tightly in Blaines embrace, he said it again, not letting go until he was sure that Blaine believed him.
"Im never saying goodbye to you."
We miss you.
Three simple words. The text was enough to distract Kurt from the performance that was in front of him as he sat with the rest of the New Directions, prepping for Nationals. Attached was a photo of Kurts Warblers huddled around a cage of miniature yellow birds in pet shop, all sharing very distressed looks, and Blaine, always needing to be the most dramatic, on his knees in the center, throwing his hands up to the sky in agony. Why they were taking pictures in pet shops, Kurt didnt question. He simply laughed at the photo, saving it into his phone and typing out a quick reply that he missed them just as much and that he was free for coffee after practice.
It was a long week of not seeing Blaine, Kurt had realized. He had been too busy catching up with Mckinley to do anything else, and Blaine had respected that, but it was obvious that he was anxious to steal Kurts freetime when he had it. Kurt couldnt lie, he liked the attention.
Blaine would text every day to ask what Kurt was up to, how he was settling in, if he was available to get lunch or go to the movies. The answer had been always been no, because Kurt hadnt been, but there was always something weirdly pleasing when Blaine would follow up with a text saying, "Okay, Ill be here when you are." After following Blaine around for so long, it was nice to bask in how much Blaine wanted him now. Not in the most ideal kind of want like Kurt had for him, but Kurt wasnt complaining.
When he had arrived at the Lima Bean, Blaine was already at a table, playing with his phone. A smile hit Kurts face instantly as he walked over to him, Blaine standing to greet and hug him.
"Geez, who knew youd become Mr. Popular once you returned to McKinley? I started to worry that you had moved on from Dalton already." Blaine spoke with a light chuckle, sitting down with Kurt as he slid him the coffee he had already ordered while waiting for Kurt.
"What can I say? Im a wanted guy. I cant please everyone, Blaine." Kurt bantered back, making Blaine chuckle a little more as Kurt took a sip of his coffee with a hum. There was a warmth from both the drink and the feeling of Blaine knowing his coffee order, the giddiness of Blaine knowing Kurt well enough to order or answer anything for him never dying down. "Plus, Daltons not exactly a place you can just forget about through educational downgrades and high school glee drama."
"I see youre having a fun return." Blaine spoke with a questioning raise of his brow.
"Oh, simply the best." Kurt spoke back sarcastically before frowning, his hand reaching for Blaines. "I miss you guys, why did I ever leave?"
"Because it was whats best for you." Blaine answered matter of factly, his hand turning to give Kurts a squeeze of reassurance, making him smile. "Dont give into nostalgia, Kurt. Stay strong."
"I would think you would be the first person to get me to give in and come back to Dalton..."
"Well, dont be mistaken, I want you back a lot," Blaine told easily, his eyes watching their hands together, distracted, as his thumb traced the back of Kurts hand - the words and gesture forcing a fluttering feeling in Kurts chest. "I just know thats not what you want. My main concern is to make sure youre comfortable and happy."
"How considerate," Kurt breathed out, a soft smile on his lips when Blaine finally looked up at him again.
"I wouldnt exactly call it considerate to not be selfish and keep you all to myself."
"Well, if you saw how many people have tried to, youd call it considerate too. Everyone wants me for themselves, its exhausting."
"Oh yeah? Well, I may have to have a little talk with these obsessive fans of yours, tell them to back off some unless they wanna deal with me."
"Ooh, maybe you should. I like the strong, fight-y boxer Blaine. Hes hot."
The words slipped out before Kurt was able to stop them, his eyes widening comically at himself. He had never called Blaine hot before. Dapper, handsome, the occasional cute, sure, but never hot. The words felt forbidden said out loud just as it had when he had described Blaine as sexy after a very embarrassing slight sex talk in his room; only feeling safe in his wandering thoughts but never out loud, and never said to Blaine.
Kurts expression went unnoticed though, Blaine missing it as he ducked his head with a soft laugh. It wasnt until Blaine looked up a bit more, his eyes focusing on their hands again, this time less distracted and with more purpose, that Kurt could see the blush on Blaines cheeks. It wasnt a strange thing to see, Blaine not usually being one to be able to hide his emotions from showing up on his face, especially when he was flustered.
But it was strange to know that Kurt had been the one to cause it. That he even had the ability to cause Blaine to blush. To scrunch up his nose with nervous laughter, shaking his head like there was no way the compliment he was receiving could ever be true. To be so flattered that he actually got nervous, as if Kurts opinion on if he was hot or not mattered. It was so strange. But god, was it fucking adorable.
The urge to never stop complimenting Blaine was sudden, and Kurt had to bite his tongue to stop himself from saying some things that would definitely cross the platonic line straight into shameless flirting.
"Well, lets hope I dont actually have to show that side of me outside of a workout, despite how attractive it is." Blaine laughed through his sentence, trailing off as his phone dinged with a message. He glanced at the screen before quickly turning the phone on silent and looking up at Kurt.
Kurt furrowed his brows in confusion, looking between the phone and Blaine. "Giving someone the cold shoulder?" he questioned, taking another sip of his coffee as Blaine looked down for a moment.
"Yeah, sort of. Its just Jeremiah, its nothing." he spoke, sparking Kurts curiosity even more.
"Are you sure? Do you wanna talk about it?"
Blaine paused, his eyes looking up at Kurt to read his face as if he wasnt sure if Kurt was serious or not, and then Kurt realized: he hadnt heard a word about Jeremiah since his and Blaines fight. Not once was he mentioned in their conversations, nor did Kurt see him at Regionals, where he shouldve been supporting Blaine. There were no cancelled plans, or things pushed around so Blaine could spend time with his boyfriend; it was him and Kurt. Blaine was prioritizing Kurt again, so much so that he had stopped talking about his trainwreck of a love life, simply focusing on Kurt when Kurt was around, and no one else. No wonder why things seemed so peaceful and serene.
"Blaine," Kurt started, giving Blaines hand a squeeze as he sat up a bit more. "You can still talk to me about this stuff. If somethings going on, Im always here to listen no matter what. You can talk about Jeremiah if you need to, Im not going to scream at you."
Blaine smiled softly at Kurt, thanking him with his eyes as he mumbled out an "Okay." Despite Kurts words of encouragement, Blaine still seemed stuck on what to say, so Kurt decided to start and let Blaine fill in the blanks.
"What happened, did you two break up?" He asked.
"No," Blaine spoke, shaking his head. Kurt forced himself to not sigh in disappointment as he kept his face straight, waiting for Blaine to continue. "Were sort of on a break. After our fight, I really thought about what you said. We were already having issues, and then you telling me how he wasnt a good person for me was just like a slap in the face. We just got into this big argument after and said some things that we didnt mean, but I dont know... I just need some time away from him."
Kurt nodded as he listened attentively, his thumb tracing patterns on Blaines skin now to comfort him. Despite not being fully broken up, Kurt couldnt help but be glad that Blaine had at least came to his senses about Jeremiah. It was better this way, Kurt knew. Jeremiah was an asshole, and Kurt would go to his grave saying that the bastard never deserved his friend in the first place.
He bit his lip as he thought about what Blaine said and wondered if Blaine knew about that night at the movies, or anything that happened after for that matter. He wanted to ask, but worried about voicing his curiosity. If Blaine didnt know then it would be just adding on to the problem. Jeremiah would be gone soon anyway, Kurt was sure he could spare Blaine the extra heartache over something he didnt have any real evidence over.
"Well, if its any consolation, Im positive hes regretting ever taking you for granted." Kurt said instead of his thoughts.
"Oh, I know he is," Blaine said with an edge in his voice. "He hasnt stopped texting me since; its doing nothing but pouring salt into the wound. All I want is just some really big distraction so I can stop thinking about him."
"And all Ive been doing is declining you all week while you were going through this..." Kurt spoke, appalled at himself before Blaine squeezed his hand.
"No, no youre fine." He quickly assured. "I know how busy youve been with catching up, I understand. I dont expect you to be at my side to listen to my dumb problems 100% of the time."
"Theyre not dumb," Kurt told, assuring Blaine just as quickly as he had been. "And Im here now." Blaine gave another thankful smile that made Kurt smile in return, taking a sip of coffee in thought before humming. "Theres a get together happening tonight at Rachels. I was going to skip out, but maybe it could be fun if we went together."
"Are you sure? Dont you have an essay due Monday or something?" Blaine questioned with a worrying tone as Kurt shook his head.
"Half of it is already finished, and you need a distraction, so yes, I am sure. As long as you dont kiss Rachel again."
Blaine laughed, ducking his head in embarrassment of the night that he almost wished he was too drunk to remember. "Okay, deal." he smiled with a nod. His eyes met Kurts again, thumb brushing against Kurts hand absentmindedly, making the flutter in his chest return. This time, Kurt embraced the feeling instead. He let the bubbliness show, his smile growing a little bigger as he laughed along with Blaine. Blaine, who was on a break. Blaine, who blushed when Kurt complimented him. Whose main concern was that Kurt was comfortable and happy. Who saw Kurt as a priority. Who Kurt was so smitten over it wasnt even funny.
The person he was going to admit that to once this break was over and Jeremiah was gone and Kurt could finally say all the things he had been holding in since Valentines Day. He had to. He couldnt allow himself to make the same mistake twice. He couldnt let Blaine slip away again.
It had been decided that Blaine would meet at Kurts house and theyd take a cab to Rachel Kurt had no intention in drinking, Blaine had insisted in case Kurt would change his mind or become too tired to drive, not wanting to become a burden that Kurt absolutely had to keep watch over and not be able to enjoy himself. "Better safe than sorry." He had said in a sing song voice, and Kurt had no option but to agree.
Looking back on it now, Kurt was very grateful about the decision because he was beginning to stress. He hadnt prepared to go to a party tonight. more specifically a party with Blaine. It was as if any suitable clothes Kurt thought he had were either not cooperating or had somehow disappeared, leaving him frustrated in his underwear close to eight.
There was a knock at his bedroom and Kurt quickly pulled on his robe before shouting a "Come in," playing with his slightly damp hair in the mirror with a sigh.
"Kurt?" Blaines voice appeared where Kurt had expected his fathers, making his heart speed up twice as fast as it had before, leaving him with an embarrassing blush on his face and neck that he hoped Blaine would pretend not to see. Of course, he was early. "Hey, why arent you dressed?"
"I have nothing to wear." He admitted in a grumble, tying his robe tighter around his waist and trying to prevent himself from becoming bashful in Blaines presence. The other boy didnt seem to be alarmed, so why should he be?
"Oh, I doubt that." Blaine scoffed, closing Kurts door after stepping in and going straight to his closet. "May I?" he asked, which Kurt gave a half hearted nod to, watching as Blaine went through hangers just as Kurt had done for him so many times before.
"Its true, theres nothing in there." Kurt huffed, plopping down on the bed and subconsciously pulling his sheets over his legs to cover himself a bit more. He allowed Blaine to dig through his closet despite his statement, admiring the casual outfit he had on instead. A navy short sleeved button down that clung to Blaines biceps perfectly, and a pair of dark skinny jeans that Blaine filled out all too well - both thing Kurt pretended not to notice. He wouldve probably been caught staring, though, it it hadnt been for Blaine letting out a fascinated hum before turning around to meet Kurts eyes, a pair of unworn leather pants in his hands and an amused grin on his face,
"What are these?" Blaine spoke with enthusiasm as Kurt stood with a shake of his head.
"A pair of pants that were only an impulse buy for fantasizing about wearing in the very far future. Theres no way I can pull those off without at least a knee length sweater, which I wont fully object to but may die of a heat stroke." Kurt laughed at the idea of even trying to put those pants on tonight as Blaine loosely crossed his arms.
"So, youre perfectly fine with wearing pants that were basically being held together by safety pins up the sides, but leather pants crosses the line?"
"Yeah,"
"Oh, yeah, I understand. Put them on." Blaine nodded before pushing the pants into Kurts hand, the smirk still playing on his face before he turned back to Kurts closet.
"What? No, impulse buy, Blaine. I just like looking at them, thats why they still have the tag on them." Kurt protested but was just met with another item of clothing being dropped in his arms.
"Then that means youll enjoy looking at them even more on you. Ill be downstairs." Blaine smiled, and before Kurt could even object again, he was walking out of the room and closing the door behind him.
Kurt stood, looking at the clothes in his hands in disbelief. It took a half hour to dress himself, admittedly a third going to trying to find something else to wear and failing and another third simply trying to pull the pants on. By the time he actually looked in the mirror though, he couldnt deny that Blaine had picked out a pretty nice outfit. The shirt he had given Kurt was a burgundy button up that Kurt easily paired with a pair of matching boots and a silver and black statement tie, and the pants, well, they fit a hell of a lot better than they did when Kurt had first bought them. He actually looked... hot.
Kurt hummed in approval of himself before grabbing his things and heading downstairs. He wasnt surprised to find Blaine sharing a conversation with his father in the kitchen as he waited, so engaged in whatever topic they were talking about that Kurt had to clear his throat to get their attention. "Okay, Im ready. Did you call a cab?"
"Youre catching a cab?" Burt piped in immediately, looking between the two as Kurt nodded.
"Well be safe, though, I promise. Dont worry, I doubt Ill actually drink anything at all." he reassured.
"Well good. Someones going to need to have their head on them and make sure you both are okay." Burt spoke, patting Kurts shoulder before looking over to Blaine. "No offense, kid."
"Hm?" Blaine hummed slowly, his eyes meeting Burts in a slightly confused daze. There was a quiet pause before a realization that Blaine hadnt stopped looking at Kurt since he walked into the room; both sets of Hummel eyes on him as he shifted, a soft redness appearing on his cheeks. "No offense taken, I didnt exactly make that great of a first impression last time." He finally spoke, glancing between the two and clearing his throat. "Anyway, the cabs been waiting outside for a while, so..."
"Right," Kurt spoke up in attempt to fix the mood despite the bit of blush rising on his cheeks also. "Finn must be wondering where we are by now. Lets go." With a quick goodbye to Burt, Kurt led Blaine out of his home to the car waiting out front, his arm looped around Blaines to try and make things a little more comfortable between them, even though Kurt was screaming inside.
Majority of the car ride was silent. It was partially Kurts fault, not exactly trying to start an actual conversation, not exactly knowing what to say. What do you say after finding out the guy youre practically head over heels for was checking you out? Kurt would pay anything to know what Blaine was thinking.
"You look really nice." He spoke up almost on cue, turning to Kurt instead of looking out the window the way he was before.
Kurt paused in his thoughts, the compliment catching him off guard as he ducked his head. "Oh, thank you." he smiled, looking over his outfit once more. "You look really nice too."
"Thank you," Blaine smiled back. "But really, the pants look really good. I dont want to say I told you so, but..."
"Oh, shut up, you would love to say I told you so." Kurt laughed, pushing Blaine softly on the shoulder.
"Youre right, I told you so. You should let me style you more often." Blaine bantered back, a prideful smile on his face as Kurt rolled his eyes. "If I was being honest though, Im confused how youre even sitting comfortably in them. Theyre basically clinging to your skin." He spoke, poking Kurts thigh as if the fabric might tear under the pressure.
"Fashion is hardly ever comfortable." Kurt spoke as Blaine laughed, nodding in agreement. "These are definitely only coming out for emergencies from now on."
"Maybe you should wear them more often. I like fashion model, leather-wearing Kurt. Hes hot."
Kurts face scrunched up in embarrassment of the words that mocked his statement from earlier as he tried to stop himself from blushing harder than he already was, but it was a lost cause. His hands covered his face as Blaine chuckled.
"Why must you torture me like this?" Kurt huffed despite the smile spread across his face.
"That wasnt my intention." Blaine hummed, trying and succeeding in pulling Kurts hands away, one still holding on to his, which didnt calm the redness on Kurts face in any way. "I just wanted you to know that I think youre hot too, so maybe we can feel a little more comfortable saying it around each other without getting flustered."
"I dont know if thatll be possible." Kurt admitted honestly, his free hand playing with his tie in distraction.
"Its just me, Kurt." Blaine spoke in a softened tone, his hand squeezing Kurts, making him look up into his eyes. He said that with so much assurance, as if the thought of it being just Blaine would help in anyway, but Kurt let the words settle him despite. He took a calming breath, forcing himself to stop from being nervous before nodding with a smile.
"Yeah, it is. Its just you."
Blaine smiled back at Kurt, scooting slightly closer, his fingers sliding between Kurts easily. "Now that thats resolved, you ready to turn the heads in that party, hot stuff?"
Kurt laughed at the name, the compliment still making him flush, but he leaned into it now than away, nodding. He could get used to it; the names and compliments and hand holding. It all felt like the build up that Kurt had been waiting for, and he couldnt help the excitement of the day where the flattery became a norm in their lives, something that didnt come as a shock for either one of them.
It was something Kurt could become comfortable with. He was just Blaine, and Kurt was just Kurt. They were just Blaine and Kurt. Kurt and Blaine. Openly hand holding and comfortably flirting. They were just them, together. And that was perfect.
"Lead the way, good looking."