Chapter 6 - Secrets

Tom realized that something was wrong. When he came to the bed that night and lay back next to his wife she didn't turn round and didn't gave him a warm smile. Amanda lay and looked somewhere in the deep. He couldn't see her eyes clear, because it was pretty dark in their bedroom and that one small lamp didn't help at all, but the man was sure that they were sad. Just sad, nothing more.

"Are you ok?" He asked softly and took her in his warm embrace. "You look a little down."

"Everything is fine, Tom. I'm just tired. Good night."

Then it was silence again. They just lay there for a long hour and Tom practically fell asleep, when his wife fluttered a little. He was sure that Amanda was sleeping, but it turned out that she was just pretending or honestly trying to sleep, but it didn't succeeded.

"Are you asleep, darling?" Amanda asked really silently.

"No. Why don't you sleep, Am?" Tom hugged her tighter and kissed on the neck. She liked those kisses.

"Just thinking…"

"About what?" Yup, Tom was right. It was really something bothering his wife, but he could feel like she was holding on and fighting inside to tell Tom or not.

"It's just… I don't know how to talk about it." She sighted, then turned around and looked him in the eyes. "Ok, let's say that there are two people, who really love each other, but other people don't think that their love is right..."

"Who are those people?' Tom kept looking in his wife's confused eyes.

"Nobody… It's just theoretical question, ok?" Amanda broke their eye contact. "What would you do? Support their love or blame them for it as well as other people do?"

Tom was thinking for a few minutes. He didn't know why this question popped into his wife's head. Their love and family was safe, so it had to be something else. When he looked down at her, Amanda looked almost guilty.

"I take it you talk about homosexual people, don't you?" He smiled calmingly.

"No! No… Yeah, well… Yes." Amanda suddenly looked scared, but when she saw her husband's eyes calmed down a little. On the other hand, there was no way back now.

"Why this thing is bothering your beautiful little head, sweetheart?" Tom asked curiously and wiped her hair away from her face. "This is not the easiest topic."

"I know." She smiled a little at his touch. "There were some TV programs about them and I just wondering… What do you think about them?"

"As long as they're quietly living their own life and not converting my kids, I'm good with them." Tom sighted. "But what I don't like is their public appearance and request for more rights. I think they have enough of them. In some states they can get married for the sake of god…"

Amanda was lying there and thinking. Those things, which Tom said, sounded like true, but somewhere deep inside she felt a little different. She thought about Kurt and Blaine again. Was Tom right? Could they really make her son gay? She couldn't believe that they would do something like this even if they could. They looked like nice guys, but lots of things that she heard from other people and now from her own husband were completely opposite. It looked to her like everyone thought they were wrong. Amanda felt so lonely in that moment, because she wasn't that sure.

"Why are you so quiet?" Tom asked her. "What do you think about gay people?"

"I don't… I don't really know." Well, at least she was honest. "I'm just thinking: what if we are not right? What if gay people are like us and don't want to attack our kids? What if they're actually nice guys?"

"We never know." Tom smiled softly to her. "I met some gay guys, when I was in collage. They weren't all the same. Some of them were party sharks and just slept around. Some of the quietly studied and didn't talk much. Some of them were proud and open, some still in the closet. So, you never know what they can do…"

"But aren't straight people the same, Tom? I mean, there probably more straight guys who are screwing around than gay guys…"

"I don't know what to tell you, darling." Tom gave her a peck on the head. "I just don't trust those people. They aren't good news in anyway. And I think you should go to sleep and stop worrying about things, which don't really involve you."

"You're probably right…" Amanda muttered a little not wanting Tom to know it actually involved her now. "But just one last question…"

"Always, darling."

"What about love?" Tom looked at her questioningly, when she continued. "Do you think that boys can truly love other boys as well as girls?"

Tom stayed quiet. Oh how much he loved his wife's innocence. She was his light in a dark night and usually she looked at difficult thing so simple that it made him think them over himself. Maybe it wasn't one of those times, because he had such a strong opinion, but it was still adorable how much Amanda cared about people she wasn't even connected to.

"Love is a miracle, Amanda." He said and kissed her on the lips. "We can't control or understand it, so I don't even try."

The next morning was seriously sunny, so Amanda woke up much earlier. She looked after her house, made her kids breakfast and started preparing tea. Her friend Gwen, who lived near Amanda, texted her and practically ordered to make it, because as she said she had some groundbreaking news.

The woman felt better than last night. Her conversation with Tom led to a hot make out session. Also, it cleared her head a little bit. At least she knew Tom's position and it wasn't bad after all. She felt like he just didn't trust gay people and it was pretty reasonable.

Amanda also wondered if Kurt and Blaine cared as much as she did. Somewhere deep inside she expected them to come, invite her for a coffee again and probably make it up. She felt really really guilty for saying those words and making Kurt cry, but she didn't know if they wanted to see her, so somehow felt like she didn't have a right to come to them first.

"Oh my god, it's so good to see you, Am!" Gwen hugged her tightly and women sat down together in Amanda's garden. "It looks like we didn't see each other forever."

'Well, we went shopping two weeks ago, but it probably doesn't count…' Amanda thought to herself at smiled at the friend. Gwen was a nice forty three years old woman with a big, rich husband, one annoying kid and lots of dirty fantasies, if Amanda always found kind of endearing. Gwen always acted like twenty-years old and it was always fun to be around her. But along with this she was the biggest gossiper in the street. She knew everything about everyone and didn't complain to share that news. This time was no different.

"You could never believe it, Amanda." She said after a few friendly talks about their favorite TV show. "We've got some new hotties in here."

"Really? How can it be?" Amanda tried to look surprised, but she pretty much knew what it was all about. "Who are they?"

"Haven't you seen them yet?" Gwen looked really excited. "They moved in next to you like last week or something… God, I was checking out that curly-haired one for hours! Have you seen his ass? Fuck, have you seen his muscles?"

"Please, Gwen, don't talk like this. My kids can hear it." The woman said laughing at her friend.

"Don't even worry. They'll learn that at school." Gwen shook her head sarcastically. "So… Have you met them?"

"Well… Actually Yes. I did."

"What?" Gwen practically jumped from her seat. "And you didn't even call me? Amanda Vegas, I should be really pissed at you right now, but…" She sat down and bended forward. "I'm too curious to hear everything. Tell me!"

Amanda didn't know where to start. Her relationship with Kurt and Blaine, if they at least had that relationship, was really messed up and she really didn't want to make things worse. So she decided to be short and laconic, even if Gwen didn't like it. She told everything she knew about their work, collages, friends, families.

"I have to say that I expected something more interesting." Gwen sighted a little, but after a few moments the evil grin came back to her face and she asked slowly. "So no wives or girlfriends? Two single, extremely hot boys? I can't believe we are so lucky, Am."

"What do you mean?" This conversation couldn't lead to anything good, Amanda really felt that.

"Oh, you're such a prude! I personally think that we should try and have some fun with those hotties and show them how grown women do it."

"Oh my god…" Amanda covered her eyes with the hands. "Please, tell me that you're kidding…"

"Of course not! Live a little, girlfriend!" Gwen patted Amanda on the shoulder. "You should relax a little bit… Think about all those things that you could do with that slim blue-eyed gentleman with those fabulously long legs. I bet he's a tiger in bed."

Amanda didn't want to hear it anymore. She got up quickly and said something about checking on the kids. What she really needed was to calm down. Of course, it wasn't Amanda's fault that she didn't know about Kurt and Blaine. She was just being well… Herself. But this time it was too much for Amanda.

"Sorry, I needed to see if Lily and Bob are alright." The woman said when she came back to her guest.

"It's ok, darling." Gwen smiled. "So… What are your plans for our summer closing picnic?"

Jesus. If it wasn't too much for Amanda before than it was now. Summer closing picnic. Annual event, which everyone in the Yellow-Field Street was so looking for. It was mostly, because their head of the council, Amanda herself, was always organizing it. Usually Amanda would have been happy about it, but this year it was different. That summer closing picnic would cause so many problems…

"I don't know…"

"Oh, I'm sure that whatever you have in mind will be amazing!" Gwen grinned cheerfully. "And it will be a great chance to have fun with Kurt and Blaine. I'm so looking forward to meet them!"