Dec. 17, 2012, 12:15 p.m.
Masks: Chapter 11 - Tears
E - Words: 3,398 - Last Updated: Dec 17, 2012 Story: Closed - Chapters: 23/? - Created: Sep 19, 2012 - Updated: Dec 17, 2012 691 0 2 0 0
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Kurt let out a contented sigh as he stared at the wedding cake topper in his locker that he'd bought for Carole and his dad's wedding. He was excited and he felt... normal again almost. Finally, here was something he could focus on... something that didn't involve Karofsky or highschool drama... Something that involved two people coming together to be happy... it involved the union of two broken families into one hopefully happy family.
It had been a week since his dad and Carole had told them and Kurt had spent the entire week on 'happy overload'. Finally things were looking up. Things were good and, though Karofsky had still been pushing him into lockers and sending slushies his way... the other had left him alone most of the time... The looks the other gave him still sent shivers down his spine and he still jumped out of his skin every time a locker slammed shut or he saw the typical McKinley letterman jacket from the corner of his eye but there was always something for him to distract himself with...
There were decorations and flowers and food and music and something blue and something new and so much more to plan. He didn't have time to think about anything but schoolwork, Glee practice, and the wedding. He was loving every moment of it.
Kurt was startled from his thoughts when he heard a bit of a cough behind him, clearly trying to get his attention. He blinked and turned, smiling brightly when he saw Finn there, "Hey... what's up? Everything ok?" he asked calmly, for once not having to pretend he was fine... cause for once he really was.
"Hey... so... I've been going over these... plans for the wedding and... I don't really get it..." he let out, looking a bit confused as he brought up Kurt's wedding itinerary, "Are you absolutely sure it's a good idea to let out 305 Doves in the church? Isn't that... I don't know... gonna get a bit... messy?"
"That's why we feed them glitter Finn," Kurt pipped up like it was the absolutely most normal thing in the world. He was, of course, being sarcastic. These would be trained Doves... he was sure they'd have been trained well enough not to 'make a mess' on wedding guests. Maybe not... Maybe he should talk to the people who rented them out first and find out for sure.
"Oh... ok..." Finn said, smiling a bit and looking like Kurt's words about feeding the birds glitter made so much sense and Kurt just let it slide. Finn had never been the brightest crayon in the box anyhow. He sometimes wondered why in the world he'd gotten a crush on the other...
"Alright... anyway, I've been thinking. I really wanna do something, you know, special for the wedding. I kind of wanna take this opportunity to remind people that I'm a leader... But I really don't know enough about weddings to know what I could do," he pipped up after a moment, looking at Kurt for guidance.
"Oh... I have the perfect idea," Kurt piped up with a nod, "After you walk your mom down the isle and give her away to my dad," he said, ignoring the comment of, 'Soooo creepy...', just continuing on with a bit of an eyeroll, "And after you do your speech to the bride and groom. I'll write it for you so you don't need to worry but feel free to give me ideas about things you'd like to talk about, you and Carole will have a lovely Mother and Son dance in front of all in attendance."
"Are you kidding me? That is a terrible idea! Everyone knows I can't dance..." Finn piped up, very against the idea and suddenly nervous at the thought of speaking in front of all those people about things that were so personal. It wasn't like singing in front of people... this was far more personal then that.
"Trust me Finn... I know what I'm doing... I've been planning weddings since I was two years old. I promise... everything is going to work out just fine. You need to trust me... unless you'd rather do the wedding plans," he said with a bit of a smirk to his soon to be step brother.
"I... I guess if I could somehow manage to pull it off it would make me look like a stud... right?" Finn let out looking to Kurt with a bit of a nod, getting one in return along with a reassuring 'definitely', as he smiled, "Alright... thanks... It's a plan," he beamed suddenly.
Kurt smiled warmly as Finn turned to walk off, shaking his head a bit. Finn had a simple mind but his heart was almost always in the right place. He found that the crush he'd had before on the other had changed to something more appropriate for the two of them... he cared deeply for Finn... like a brother.
He finally turned back to his locker, grabbing his books for his next class, sticking the wedding topper, which he was bringing with him everywhere the last few days, on to the top of the stack before closing his locker, about to lock it when he spotted red and white in his peripheral vision.
His whole body tensed in an instant, his eyes turning towards the letterman jacket... and the one wearing it. Karofsky... He could feel his whole body tremble as he took a step back as Karofsky moved towards him, eyes boring into him. He wanted to throw up from fear suddenly and he couldn't help but shake his head.
"I don't want you anywhere near me," Kurt said in a shaky frightened voice as he took another step back as the other just kept walking towards him. He jumped a bit when the others hand shot out, two fingers pressing on his chest, pushing him back more and Kurt just went with it, just wanting the other male to go away...
Karofsky finally pulled his fingers away from the frightened boy, still not taking his eyes off of him. Kurt tensed, a bit of a skittish gasp escaping his lips when Karofsky's hand shot forward suddenly. But instead of hitting him or grabbing him or anything like that... Karofsky had just snatched up the cake topper that had been resting on top of the stack of books in Kurt's arms.
"Can I have this?" he asked with a smirk, loving the reactions he was getting out of the frightened boy but at the same time he wanted to make him feel better... He wanted to drag the other into the locker room and press him against the wall and take what he'd been wanting for so long... and make Kurt want it too.
Kurt, of course, couldn't say anything, he was frozen in place, scared and feeling like he might just pass out right there. When Dave just chuckled and let out a, 'thanks' before turning to walk off Kurt broke down. He couldn't do this anymore... He'd thought he was fine but he wasn't... things weren't alright...
His body trembled as he took in short little gasped breaths as he began to panic, his heart hammering in his chest. He wanted to throw up, he couldn't think and he couldn't calm himself down. He just stared blankly at the ground on complete overload, head starting to spin.
He was about to completely collapse to his knees when a hand was put on his shoulder, shaking him from his thoughts though he still couldn't quite move as he let out shuddering breaths, tears finally slipping down his cheeks.
"Are you alright?" came Mr. Schuester's voice and Kurt couldn't help it anymore. He shook his head, trembling as he let out a soft sob and a shaky reply of 'no'. Mr. Schue frowned, squeezing his shoulder a bit and nodding, "Alright... lets go to the principle..." he said, guiding the frightened boy towards the principle's office, which was still occupied by Sue Sylvester after she got Figgins fired.
Sue's head lifted when Mr. Schue and Kurt came in. Mr. Schue closed the door right away and guided Kurt into a seat. Sue frowned as she looked to the boy who just sat there, almost hyperventilating. She had no idea what was going on but she already knew she wanted to do whatever she could to help.
She knew most of the students didn't like her... that she was a bully and she was tough on them. But the truth was... part of the reason she did what she did was as a way of helping the students prepare for the tough world outside of high school. People could be cruel... and if you weren't prepared for it... they'd crush you.
Kurt's face was red from crying as the boy sat there, curled in on himself, sobbing and panting as Mr. Schue looked to Sue pleadingly before turning back to Kurt, kneeling in front of him. He reached up and put a hand on Kurt's cheek, shocked when the boy gasped and flinched away from him as if he thought he was going to hurt him. He frowned and pulled his hand away and sighed.
"Kurt... it's alright... you're safe. Just take a deep breath ok?" he said, not really sure what to do right now. They couldn't start trying to take care of all of this until Kurt was calm enough to talk to them. Kurt shook his head to the man as he continued to sob, trying hard but the boy didn't look like he could get himself under control right now.
"God dammit Porcelain!" Sue snapped suddenly, her voice loud as she slapped her hands on the table, "pull yourself together or get up and get out. I don't have time to sit here and listen to you blubber like an idiot!" she let out harshly but it did what they needed. Kurt all but froze, clenching his eyes shut and taking a couple of deep breath and quickly forcing himself to calm down.
Mr. Schue looked to Sue and frowned at her behavior for a moment but when he looked back at Kurt and saw the other had calmed down quite a bit he realized it had worked... somehow. He sighed as he grabbed a Kleenex from the box on the desk, handing it to Kurt who nodded and let out a quiet meek 'thank you', wiping his face and blushing as he blew his nose.
Kurt felt weak and useless and pathetic and Sue was right... why should they help him if he couldn't even help himself? The shock had been enough to kick start things and let himself calm down and once he'd cleaned himself up a bit he gave a nod to the two of them, "I'm ok..." he let out after a moment and Mr. Schue smiled weakly and shifted to sit on the seat next to him.
"Good... Now can somebody please tell me what the heck is going on?! Cause I'm not taking guesses..." Sue let out looking from one to the other, glad that Kurt seemed to have calmed down. For a while there she was actually worried he'd pass out and she'd have to call an ambulance... not something you wanted to do in your first month of being a principle.
Mr. Schue sighed softly, looking to Kurt who didn't look like he wanted to say anything just yet before looking over to Sue, "I was talking with some students when I noticed Kurt down the hall. Karofsky was walking away from him and Kurt looked like he was about to pass out. I could tell something had happened... Karofsky's been bothering him for some time... and I think it's been a lot worse this year."
"It... It's definitely worse..." Kurt finally murmured out and Sue looked from Will to the effeminate boy who kept his eyes down, "I'm scared..." he whispered out, trembling a bit and biting his tongue fairly hard to keep down the panic again, the pain, as usual, somehow seeming to take the edge off of the fear, "He wont leave me alone..."
"Did he physically hurt you?" she asked as she moved around to sit on the desk in front of the other. Her mind was working overtime now. She'd spent most of her youth being picked on because she'd had a challenged sister and though she didn't show it... she hated to see others being hurt like that. And from the way the boy had been only moments before... this was really getting to him.
"N... No..." Kurt whispered out, shaking his head, still not meeting her eyes. Part of him wanted to admit to them what Karofsky had done... what he'd done in the locker room but another part of him was ashamed... and absolutely terrified of the other boy.
"But you said he's shoved you into the lockers before," Mr. Schue pointed out, praying to god there was something they could do for the boy. Kurt was falling apart and he wasn't the only one who'd noticed it. All of the members of the Glee club were worried about him. Quite a few of them, including Puck, had come up to him in private to tell them their worries. Puck had even told him he'd found Kurt in the washroom getting sick and crying.
The truth was Will had been keeping a close eye on the boy as best he could when he had the time. He'd even followed behind the other to some of his classes to make sure he made it there ok. He'd scan the hallways when he walked down them, looking for Kurt or even just seeing if he could keep tabs on Karofsky... if Karofsky wasn't near Kurt then Kurt was safe. But somehow he still hadn't actually seen anything... somehow he'd missed it every time. It made him feel like a horrible teacher.
Sue sighed after a moment as she shook her head, "I'm afraid I can't expel a student for shoving... He'll just say it was an accident... that he tripped or something... I use that excuse all the time... it works like a charm... It's just not enough," she said, wishing there was more. Wishing Karofsky had done more. She'd seen Kurt come to school with a black eye the other day and if it was Karofsky... all Kurt needed to do was say it was and that would be enough... But Kurt had been pretty tight lipped about that incident.
"He didn't shove me this time though..." Kurt let out quietly, finally looking up at Sue, frowning, "He just... terrified me," he said, knowing right away that that just sounded absolutely ridiculous. He sounded weak... but they didn't know... they had no idea what Karofsky was doing... they couldn't know.
"Porcelain... I can't suspend a student just because he scares you... Highschool's a dry run for the rest of your life... it's rough and people can be cruel. It's part of life though," Sue let out, shrugging a bit and frowning. In her head though she was begging the kid to just let it all out. She had a feeling there was more to this then he was letting on. There was just something in her gut saying this whole situation was just fucked up.
"That's it? That's all you have to say? That's your advice? Live with it?" Mr. Schue let out as he looked to her, "there has got to be something you can do..." he urged, shaking his head a bit. There had to be something... anything that they could do to protect Kurt. The kid looked like he might just shatter at any moment if this continued. He'd seen the stories on the news about kids committing suicide because of bullying and he was honestly terrified that Kurt might end up just like them if things didn't change.
"William... I was bullied my entire life," Sue piped up as she moved back around to sit at her desk, "I grew up with a Handi-Capable sister. I know perfectly well how mean people can get. Was it hard... hell yes... did it make me stronger? You bet it did."
"It's the fear and the waiting that's the worst... I never know when it's coming... I can't concentrate in class or... anywhere... I don't feel like I'm part of this school at all. I feel like I'm part of some horror movie where some serial killer or monster lurks the hallways waiting for me... following me... waiting just behind the corner for me to pass by to strike... and you're telling me that there is nothing I can do about it? I mean... you have no idea what's going on in this kid's head... You have no idea what he's capable of..."
"What does that mean, Kurt?" Mr. Schue piped up, alarm bells ringing in his head. Kurt had just compared David Karofsky to a serial killer. And he'd just told them that they had no idea what the other boy was capable of. He suddenly felt like there was something Kurt wasn't telling them. He'd had a feeling it had been Karofsky who'd hit him and left that nasty bruise over his eye but Kurt had denied it saying it had been a fall. Everyone knew that was a lie but if Kurt wouldn't tell them then there wasn't much they could do.
"N... Nothing... It's nothing... I'm probably just overreacting," Kurt said, closing his eyes and shaking his head. He knew he was making them suspicious and part of him wanted them to pry... to ask the questions he didn't want to answer... to force him to answer and to save him... but the other part of him was afraid... afraid of Karofsky and ashamed that he'd actually enjoyed what the other had done to him. He didn't want anyone to find out.
"Hey... Lady... If this kid even so much as lays a finger on you... you come to me right away, understood? And I will expel him faster then a family of birds could nest in Schuester's hair," she said with a nod. The warning bells had shot through her own head as well. Clearly Kurt was keeping something from them... but if he didn't open his mouth and speak there wasn't much she could do for him.
"Alright? Until that happens though... and I'm very sorry to say this... there is nothing legally that I or the school-board can do. Unless... of course... there's more to this then you're telling us," she said, hoping she could give him that little nudge to get him to tell them the truth, "Are you sure there's nothing you haven't told us? Maybe something you forgot to mention about that black eye you had last week?"
Mr. Schue looked over to Sue at this point, smiling weakly and glad she'd said something. He'd been thinking the same thing after all and he prayed that Kurt would say something... He just needed to say 'yes... yes it was him' and that would, hopefully, be enough to get rid of Karofsky at least for a little while.
"N... No... No there's nothing else... I'm sorry for wasting your time," Kurt let out quietly, shaking a bit and not meeting the eyes of either adult. He was afraid... so afraid... afraid of telling... afraid of not telling... He didn't know what to do. Right now he just wanted to get out of here.
"Alright... Come on Kurt... We're going to be late for Glee rehearsals..." Will let out quietly, frowning a bit. There wasn't much they could do if Kurt wasn't being honest with them. He prayed that Kurt would come to one of them, however, if things got worse. Didn't he realize that they just wanted to help?
"Right..." Kurt let out quietly as he stood up, looking to Ms. Sylvester and smiling weakly, "Thank you..." he let out, glad she'd at least tried. He was glad she wasn't mean about it and understood. He wasn't really expecting it from her but he was glad for it.
"You take care of yourself... and remember... he lays even a finger on you... you come and see me," she said with a nod, knowing right well that he hadn't told them everything but there was little she could do since he refused to say anything. She'd done what she could with what she'd been given.
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Comments
This chapter was really good. It was nice to see how Sue and Will were willing to help Kurt if he reached out to them and it was nice to see their thoughts on the situation. That is one of the things that I love about fan fiction is that it allows the writers to create the inner thoughts of the characters that make it easy to understand while they do what they do. I can't wait to read the next chapter and I was really excited that the chapter was dedicated to me. I am new to the site and I am just happy to see that people are interested in what I have to say. You are a really great writer and I can't wait to see what you come up with next.
Being able to write characters thoughts is one of my favourite things. Sue isn't a bad person... She just acts like one. I'm glad your enjoying the story so far and I really appreciate the reviews. :) welcome to the site.