Oct. 4, 2014, 7 p.m.
Courage: Far From Home
E - Words: 6,719 - Last Updated: Oct 04, 2014 Story: Complete - Chapters: 51/? - Created: Jul 19, 2014 - Updated: Jul 19, 2014 210 0 0 0 0
When Blaine peeled his wet cheek up from the flattened pillow, he opened his mouth in a noisy yawn. His nose crinkled as the heavy exhale stretched his mouth wide, but he blindly flung his hands up to his face and smoothed away the wrinkles and puffiness in his cheeks. His fingers slid across a line of drool that had run down to his chin, and he frowned and quickly put his hands back down. Finishing his yawn with a stretch, he raised his arms above his head, but they dropped to his sides when he heard, from beside of him, "Why... Why..." He turned his head over to Kurts side of the bed, where he was already sitting up on his fluffed pillow, and his eyes widened at the little boy who had his nose stuck in a book and his eyebrows so furrowed that tiny creases ruffled his forehead. Kurt never looked so concerned, especially in the morning when he went about his grooming and preening like a cat, brushing his hair back into place and rubbing the sleep from his eyes. Mornings always seemed to be one of Kurts favorite times of day because he could admire what good his beauty sleep had done for him, but, for once, Kurt let his eyes narrow and his lips purse, making the corners of his eyes crumple and a white line appear where his mouth once was.
Tracing his finger across the words he had been staring at for a few minutes, Kurt tried the sounds again, his tongue curling and uncurling very slowly, "Sn... Snow Why..." He gave up on trying to form the words and tapped his bottom lip, considering how he should go about figuring out how the letters sounded. Once he tired of being frazzled over the English words, he turned his blue gaze to Blaine, and the corners of his mouth turned up in a small smile. "Good morning." He squeaked, his light hand moving from his lap and stroking Blaines wild curls. Leaning down to kiss Blaines forehead, he pulled back up with brighter eyes, "Sometimes you snore when you sleep." The tip of his nose pointed up with his sudden amusement of his new discovery of Blaine, and then his lips parted as he laughed at the redness that colored Blaines cheeks. "How very cute you are."
While Blaine bit his bottom lip because he wanted to keep his mouth clamped shut so he didnt make any more strange noises, Kurt tried to squirm closer to him, a struggle because he was so bundled up in their warm blankets. His movements made the book in his lap fall to the side, drawing his attention back over to it. At the reminder of the words hed puzzled over earlier, his mouth fell open, and he snatched up the book and flipped back to the page where theyd left off last night. Showing the book to Blaine, Kurt pointed at the first sentence, "What is this word?"
Blaine looked at the word, "White." He said, taking the book from Kurt and resting it between them. He ran his finger along the words, stopping at every new syllable so Kurt could understand, "Snow White was kept safe by the dwarves, each of whom loved the songs she would sing to them, calling to her dear prince who she longed for by days wake and nights sleep. She desired for him to return to her, when both of them could know they were safe from evil and could find peace in love. But what she didnt know was that, as her prince traveled back to the castle to spear the stepmother once and for all, her stepmother lurked in the woods, spreading her wickedness among the trees that stretched awake, and then lashed their limbs at whatever crossed their paths. The forest animals that came every morning and every afternoon and every evening to hear Snow Whites mournful song fled from her, leaving Snow White just the same as they hopped and fluttered and burrowed to get away from the crows that swooped down to snatch them and the roots that burst from the ground and coiled around them."
Lifting his gaze for just a moment to the picture of the animals running away from the Evil Queen, Blaine heard Kurt gasp at the dreadful chaos that ensued. He turned the page and started on the next few words, but even he went rather slowly through each sound because he knew the bad that the Evil Queen wrought would only get worse. Hed always hated this part of the story, for the first time hed heard of it, hed cried for Snow White and her prince, who was devastated that hed lost his beautiful princess. But his dad, thinking rudely of his heightened emotions for the broken couple, had slapped him across the face and said, "Its just a fairytale. Its not real." But, to Blaine, it was all real, because he could feel the way the prince felt as he collapsed over Snow White, who, just like her name, had turned cold.
Frowning at the scene that was imminent to come, he muttered very quietly, "One day, when the dwarves went out to mine for jewels that Snow White always appreciated when she received them as gifts from her doting friends, the stepmother came to her small cottage that she was busy dusting and sweeping. She sang to herself as she cleaned, a woeful tune for her prince, who still had not returned after many days and many nights. Naïve to the arrival of her stepmother, Snow White startled at the sound of a knock at the door. She went to answer it, always ready to help anyone who came to her in need, and was surprised at the sight of her stepmother. Even though she started to turn away, her stepmother offered her a red apple, not nearly as red as Snow Whites lips, but the red of a drop of blood. And Snow White couldnt resist forgiving her stepmother, who she had wanted to hold dear to her since she was young. With a sweet smile and a word of thanks, Snow White took the apple and sank her pearly teeth into the red, staining the white with blood. Very soon after she chewed the juicy treat, Snow White gulped at the sour flavor, and she made a desperate noise for help, but it was unheard over the sound of the queens laughter. As Snow White collapsed to the ground without even being able to see her prince return, the queen turned away and rushed from the prince, who had come back to his princess after days of hunting and not finding. And when he arrived, he finally found, from the corner of his eye that was blind to her in his unwavering attention to his princess, a queen vanishing into the disaster she had created, and his beautiful Snow White frozen."
Closing the book even though he wanted to go on to the better half, Blaine raised his golden eyes to Kurt, who had his fingers to his mouth that was hanging open. "Oh, no..." He peeped, shaking his blond head and making his messy locks fall over his forehead. Blaine quickly brushed them back into place, keeping his eyes on Kurts wide, swimming eyes. Patting Blaines arm to urge him to open the book again, he turned his big, blue eyes that were shimmering with emotion to Blaines face, making Blaine smile because he knew exactly what Kurt was going to ask and that he couldnt resist those sapphires. Kurts pretty eyes lowered to the book in Blaines hands, and he pleaded with him, "Oh, dear Blaine, we cannot close the book there! Just one more page? A word or two?"
Blaine helplessly chuckled, a snort escaping his mouth, as he watched Kurt stick his bottom lip out. Kurt had him at the first word of his begging, but maybe Blaine was just waiting for that cute, little lip to pucker. He had his favorite habits of Kurt. Bending over for a playful kiss, Blaine pushed the pages aside until they got to the place where they left off. As he started on the next word, Kurt snuggled into his side again, happily purring as he heard Snow White come back to life. Blaine wrapped his arm around his best friend, mumbling very lowly, "The dwarves prepared the coffin for Snow White, a glass bed because, even in death, she was as soft and as white as the pure, fallen snow. But, as Snow Whites blue eyes were closed, the prince was overcome with sadness, and he bent for one last kiss from his princess. The warm kiss melted snow, and as Snow Whites cold heart heated up, her black lashes fluttered and her red lips parted, revealing the most beautiful of all beauties. And, as Snow White came to life in her princes arms as he carried her off to his castle in the clouds, the Evil Queen stumbled upon the mines, where the jewels that Snow White loved so much were kept, and she fell in and pricked her heart on the sharpest of sapphires."
Turning his gaze down to the top of Kurts blond head, Blaine smoothed his hair again and bent for another kiss, feeling the heat on his glowing cheeks. He was so happy about the good ending to Snow Whites story that he was grinning from ear to ear, and when Blaine rubbed his cheek against his, Kurt mewled and twisted around to Blaine so he could loop his arms around his neck. "Love you." He chirped, burrowing his tiny face into Blaines neck. His silky lips pressed to the underside of Blaines jaw, a tiny peck that Blaine interrupted with his mouth.
Hunter had never wanted to be near Karofsky before, but, that morning, as soon as he slid off of his bed, he rushed down the stairs in search of a quick bath before he went out for the day. Itd been a day since hed been cleaned from his toes to his head, and he was starting to feel icky, a thin layer of sweat clinging to his skin, and crusty drool dried against his lip after two very short nights of sleep. With Karofsky constantly moving around somewhere below him in the dead of night, never seeming to sit down to rest, Hunter warily kept an ear open for the creaking stairs, but Karofsky never came up to stir him when he should have been sleeping, so Hunter let himself doze off every now and then, but he always jerked up moments later, still paranoid of being ripped from his mattress and thrown over Karofskys knee.
But this morning was different with Karofsky, who had finally given him the offer of coming out in the open with him. To Hunter, a day away from the bright sun and the scratchy sand was long enough. His daddy always let him go out whenever he pleased, except when he was supposed to be eating dinner, or sleeping after bedtime, or taking a bath, so maybe this man wasnt so bad if he allowed him to go out and play. Of course, not having Archer by his side took away some of the fun, but Hunter knew he would be reunited with his best friend soon enough. The moment that Karofsky turned his back, Hunter was going to take advantage of his freedom and run away from him.
The thought of coming across his family again made a wide smile tug at Hunters lips as he thudded down the stairs, not even being careful when he heard the sound of a TV playing. Karofsky was nothing to fear, he realized, not when Hunter would have nothing to do with him soon enough. As he turned the corner and skidded into the living room, his eyes fell on Karofskys big form. He was lounging on the couch, just as his daddy sometimes did on lazy days, with the TV flashing in front of him, but he was anything but relaxed. His eyes were rimmed in red, as if hed been crying, and a frown was so engraved in his thin lips that it looked like it would get stuck there. When Hunter took another step to him, he raised his heavy head and glanced over at him. Sniffing, Karofsky raised his hands and wiped off his wet face, "Hunter... whend you get up?" He set aside the nearly empty bottle that was clasped very tightly in his hand, and he scooted off the edge of the couch. Kneeling in front of Hunter, who withdrew only a step, he held his hands out for him, "Are you hungry?"
Hunter thought about the stale food that Karofsky had stored in his pantries, and he frowned and turned up his nose at the offer, even though his belly did rumble. "Can I have a bath?" He asked quietly, looking up at the ceiling, where the bathroom that he knew of was.
"A bath?" Karofsky repeated, pushing his mouth to one side of his face as if he was confused over what a bath even was. "I guess you can." He took Hunters little hands in his, getting back up to his feet, and he led him over to a dark room that was halfway down a hallway. Flipping on a light and revealing a room that had yellowed with stains and gunk that had built up in every corner, Karofsky went over to the tub and flipped a few nozzles. "Come here." As Hunter drew closer to him, Karofsky started to stand up, but then he looked back down at him. "Do you know... how to bathe yourself?"
Hunter shook his head, holding up his arms, as he always did for his daddy whenever he undressed him, "Daddy always did it." Karofsky said nothing to that and grabbed the bottom of Hunters shirt, pulling it over his head. Hooking his thumbs into Hunters pants, he tugged those down, then picked him up and set him in the water. It was cool on Hunters skin, which made him shiver, and Karofsky mumbled an apology that he didnt have the money to get hot water. Hunter didnt understand what he meant, so both of them faded into an awkward silence as Karofsky tried to figure out what soap was for what area and how to get him rinsed off.
Feeling Karofskys big hands sliding over him, Hunter watched him rub the soap along his arms, his chest, his stomach, his thighs, and then between his legs. For some reason, even though Hunter thought nothing of it when his daddy soaped him between his thighs, he automatically shut his legs before Karofsky could reach between them. Karofsky made a low sound of aggravation, and he touched Hunters knee. "Come on. I wont hurt you." Hearing a sharp tone in Karofskys voice, Hunter thought about how far he could push him before he refused him his day of freedom and instead took him on his knee and slapped him. He considered what he would give up to get back to his family, so he hesitantly opened his legs and winced at the brush of Karofskys rough knuckles against his sensitive member.
Karofskys fingers didnt stay on him for long, just a few swipes to lather him with soap, and then they fell away. The way Hunter gritted his teeth and pushed his shoulders up to his ears must have been enough for Karofsky to feel a brief moment of pity on him. Replacing his fingers with the cup that he used to rinse him off, Karofsky quickly finished the bath and helped Hunter stand from the puddle of murky water. After he was scrubbed dry, Karofsky considered what he could wear, either the smelly clothes that hed had on for the past two days, or the towel that he had at his hips, because Karofsky didnt have any little clothes. At Hunters sad expression, Karofsky picked him up and rested him against his chest, "Come on. Ill see if I can find something."
He stood completely still for a moment, as if surprised by the idea that he had to provide for a little one now. But after he recovered from his shock, he took a few steps out of the bathroom and turned to a tiny closet that was a few doors down. The inside was packed with medicine, bandages, and flasks, but underneath was a bag that was caked in dust. Karofsky pulled that out and ripped it open, coughing at the flakes that flew off of it. He pulled out a little shirt that had wrinkled and worn, and a pair of pants that had a hole at the knee, and he held them up to Hunters body. Hunter was almost tempted to wear the clothes hed been stuck in for two days. Karofsky shed him of the towel and pulled the pants onto him first, frowning at the way they sunk down several inches. "These were my clothes when I was little." He muttered, coughing halfway through his sentence. "Ill find you some clothes that are your size."
Hunter hated the musty stench that wafted up to his nose every time he turned his head, and he hated the way his pants fell to his knees whenever he twitched his leg, and he hated the way the hole at the top of the shirt was almost as wide as his shoulders. He just wanted to go home and be back in his own clothes, which were always so soft and fit him just right. Holding up his pants so they didnt trip him anymore, Hunter ran over to the door when Karofsky started heading that way. He waited by it, impatiently staring up at the knob which was quite a ways above him. Karofsky finally twisted it and let him out, and he hurried across the lawn, only pausing for a second when the shock of stumbling on snow made him remember that he wasnt in his sunny California anymore. Karofsky caught up with him when they both met at the car and yanked on his arm. "Hunter," he snapped, making Hunter glance up at him as he wondered what had gone wrong. "Dont run so far ahead. Stay by my side unless I tell you not to." Opening the door for him, he grabbed him around his waist and dropped him onto the seat. "Keep your head down until we get into town. I dont want anyone to see you."
Hunter strapped himself into the car, and he reluctantly pushed himself deeper into the seat until he couldnt see out the window, which he had really been looking forward to. As Karofsky climbed into his own seat, Hunter wriggled around in his, anxiously waiting for them to stop somewhere so Hunter could take off. Karofsky put a hand on his thigh as a warning for him to keep still, and, Hunter, not wanting to get this privilege taken away when he was so close to his family, remained in one position for the whole car ride, except when Karofsky took an odd looking stick from his pocket and stuck it into his mouth. The rank stench that floated out of that stick made Hunter turn his head, the only time he moved for all of those minutes that seemed to drag on and on. Finally, Karofsky slowed down somewhere, and Hunter barely tilted his head, wanting to get a glimpse of anything he could. "You can sit up now." Karofsky said around the stick in his mouth, and he took it out one last time and stubbed the end on the edge of the window, which was rolled down and had been letting in the most uncomfortable, icy breeze. He flicked the stick outside, then he opened his door and struggled to get his big body out of the car.
Unhooking himself from the seat, Hunter followed Karofsky, dropping into a pile of snow that made his toes curl. As he looked around at the dreary town that he didnt recognize, all rundown buildings and tight alleyways, Hunter realized that they had gone the wrong way. They werent in the town of Lima, but somewhere else that made Hunter shudder with terror. He had never been anywhere like this. His daddy would never allow it. "You were born here." Karofskys voice came from behind him, and he turned his head and looked up at that soured face, Karofskys mouth and eyes wrinkled as he squinted at everything around him. "Your stepmom told me that you were born in one of these alleys. I dont know which one. Her and your mom were going to lose you, and they couldnt make it to the hospital."
Hunters eyes widened to the size of saucers. This man must have been crazy, one of those people that Archer feared so much, like the Mad Hatter. He knew he had his père and his daddy, and hed always been their son, so how could he have ever had a mom, let alone a stepmom, like his père had. Ignoring the mans insane rambling, Hunter followed on the mans heels as he headed for one of the sidewalks that was starting to break apart into pieces of gravel. They found a store a few feet down the road, a small one that advertised the lowest prices in town. Karofsky pushed through the door and reached down for Hunters hand, so Hunter laid his in his, knowing that even though he had a hold of him now, he would get his chance to leave him soon enough. After Karofsky picked up a basket to put their things in, he started for the food section, and he picked up a loaf of bread, but put it back after he read something on the label. He did the same with a few other items, and by the fifth item he put back, he seemed upset at something because he laid his head in his hand and scrubbed his forehead. "What do you want to eat?" He said after a moment, and Hunter didnt reply at first because he wasnt sure if Karofsky was even talking to him from the way he was turned away from him. "I dont have a lot of money."
Picking up a bag of carrots because he knew that, if his plan to escape failed-which it shouldnt, he would be stuck eating with Karofsky, and it sounded like he wouldnt be eating often. So he might as well eat healthy and try to keep himself well during those few times he was able to open the refrigerator. The two of them decided on carrots, bread, milk, and butter, which would be enough to sustain them for a few days, and then Karofsky took him over to a few racks of clothes. Hunter knew that his intent wouldnt be on style, like how his père picked clothes, but on what was cheapest, so he let Karofsky search through the hangers until he found a dark shirt and a pair of sweatpants. They took their things up to the counter, and Hunter, distracted by watching Karofsky fumble through his wallet and count the few dollars that he had, forgot to slip away from him. As they walked out to the car, he silently hated himself for making a mistake like that, when that could have been his only chance to get away. But, Karofsky, who was everything that his parents werent, was so interesting to him, how, every time he got into the car, he put a stick between his lips, and how, whenever he stood up, he always slumped his shoulders. He was sad, while his parents werent.
But Karofsky didnt tell him to duck his head that time they were in the car, and he just drove a few blocks down, which Hunter was glad about. As they climbed from the car that time, Hunter realized he was in an even worse area, where the collapsing buildings were lit up with signs that blinded him every few seconds that they blinked. Inside, through the tinted window, he could make out the faint forms of girls dancing and boys shuffling around, gawking at the girls. It was all so confusing to him. But, luckily, Karofsky turned away from those places and, instead, pulled him into a quieter, but still smelly, building where men sat at a long table and held up fingers, soon receiving bottles full of drinks that smelled sour and bitter.
Karofsky brought him over to one of the tables that was completely empty, and he set him down on one of the stools, "Ill be gone for just a little while. This job is really important, Hunter. We need it for money. We can have things if I get this job. Ill give you a better life, I promise." Pressing a kiss to Hunters lips before he could pull back, Karofsky turned away again and headed over to one of the men behind the counter. He was soon guided back to a room off to the side, where Hunter wondered if he would be kept long enough for him to get away. He had to try, and if he failed, he would have to stay just a little longer with Karofsky, until he could try again. But he would try. He had to.
Looking around himself to make sure he knew where the door was, Hunter glanced over at the men at the long table, none of them paying attention to him. Their eyes were all on the TV, which was playing what Hunter thought was football. He glanced one last time at the door Karofsky had disappeared through, making sure that it was shut, before he started sliding off of his chair. The chair was high up, so the drop to the ground was a noisy one, his feet clunking against the floor, but no one looked up. He could do this. Shuffling over to the door, he reached up and pawed for the handle, managing to grab it after he stretched on his toes. He twisted it back and forth until he finally heard a click, and then it opened, granting him the outside world, where he could run around in search of his family. Tiptoeing through the door, he put one foot on the concrete sidewalk when he heard something smash behind him.
He whipped back around, when he knew he should have just run, and his eyes widened at Karofsky, who appeared in the doorway. He wondered how hed seen him move, and then his eyes flicked over to a dark window, which another face appeared in. Hed missed the window in his search of the building, a mistake he never should have let happen. Screaming as Karofsky lunged at him, a cry for help from oblivious people who just stood there, watching a dad run after his disobedient son, Hunter turned around when he realized that no one was going to save him. No one knew that Karofsky had taken him from his real family. To them, he was just a naughty baby who needed a few slaps across the bottom. After all, this was an important interview for Karofsky, and he didnt need to be interrupted by his unappreciative son.
Tearing away from Karofsky on his quick legs that were just a step too short, Hunter burst into tears as he was swooped off of the ground in a pair of strong arms. It was a dumb idea, he knew, to try to outrun Karofsky, but it had been his last hope. While his daddy used to save him, now he had to save himself. Crying because he knew he was one moment longer of being away from his family, crying because he knew Karofsky would beat him when they got home, and crying because he knew that now that he had failed, he would be stuck with him for one moment longer, Hunter collapsed against Karofskys chest, hearing no heartbeat against his ear. Instead, he listened to him through slightly muffled ears as he spoke to the man who had obviously wanted to hire him for the job. After Karofsky said something, the man gave up with a broken sigh, "Just... come in on Monday, Karofsky. Dont be late. Youre on my last nerve. And leave that brat of yours at home."
"He wont act like this again." Karofsky said through a cold tone, and Hunter whimpered, knowing of the torture that would entail tonight. As Karofsky carried him out of the building, not a word out of his mouth, Hunter dared a glance up at that emotionless expression. After he was thrown into the car and then yanked out of it again, it was no surprise to him that he ended up with his pants at his ankles, bent over Karofskys sharp knee that jabbed into his stomach, and a hard palm coming down on his bottom every few seconds. As he cried over the punishment, and, more, the lack of his family, Hunter secretly started hating, not Karofsky-hed hated him from the moment that woman had taken him from his family, all so she could give him to him-but himself. But he knew he had to keep those emotions hidden away, just so Karofsky couldnt see that he was changing him, because he always wanted to be his daddys good baby.
Kurts arrival in France was very much like the one in which he had to leave his everything behind, his mom and dad, his children, his dearest Blaine, but, this time, he had left his Hunter behind, and knew that there would be no way he could ever see him again. As he walked the long hallways of the home he and Blaine had shared their honeymoon in, he found nothing but idle time in front of him. But he didnt want to be idle. That would give him time to think. And he didnt want to think. With the unpacking finished, he saw nothing ahead of him but an evening of resting on the couch, waiting. He didnt know what he was waiting for. But he was waiting. On his pathway up and down the hallways, he came across the bathroom, which he could see was lit up from the crack at the bottom of the door. Pushing it open, he poked his nose inside and found his husband knelt by the edge of the tub, his fingers running through Archers dripping hair.
Archers wide, blue eyes were lowered to the bubbles that had gathered around his waist, and he splashed the white foam with his little hands, making suds fly up to Blaines arms. Smiling when Blaines hands appeared through the now clear water, he grabbed a few of his fingers, tugging and twisting them as if they were bath time toys. Because his hands were occupied by Archer, Blaine let the silly baby play for just a moment before they got back to soaping and rinsing while he glanced up at Kurts pale, drained face. He knew what he looked like, washed out by the black that draped around his shoulders and waist, a color that he thought distastefully of because it wasnt becoming at all. But it was all that he wanted to wear in his time of grieving the death of his son, a sad color that was the only thing to show the pain in his heart. And, little Archer, who knew not why his père wore such a dark color, thought innocently of the sudden change in Kurts wardrobe, or else Kurt might not wear it and choose something like gray if he thought that Archer had even the slightest clue that black was a mourning color. The last thing he wanted was for Archer to catch on to the dismal, black fog that hung over all of their heads.
Kurt decided, as he looked into his husbands slightly watery eyes, that he needed some advice. Blaine had always been the one that Kurt had gone to, but now that Blaine was just as clueless as he was, Kurt needed someone who could tell him what he could say to his husband, but first, how he himself could tell himself to be okay. He needed his aunt, who had already suffered the loss of her own sister, and would know just what to do to comfort him, so that he could comfort his husband. "Im going to visit my aunt." Kurt murmured quietly, walking over to Blaine and bending over him. With a kiss to his husbands nodding head, Kurt gave him a gentle hug, then he reached down to Archer and stroked him. "Ill be home soon, my love."
Without another word between the two of them, but a small coo from Archer, Kurt whirled on his heel and padded out of the room. Downstairs, he found Keegan pressed to the window, his turquoise eyes flicking around the garden that had started to shrivel up with the cold weather that whipped around outside. Slipping out the front door, Kurt sighed at the fresh air, rather than the stifling haze that was all they could breathe in their empty home. He spread his hands into the open air, exhausted of keeping his hands at his stomach, clutching it so he didnt breathe so much and risk letting out any devastated noises or sobs. It was best to be silent, not only around Archer, but also near Blaine, who Kurt could tell was trying not to break himself. If Kurt couldnt control his tears, he feared that Blaine would also cry, and Archer couldnt see either of his parents crying.
The walk to his aunts home was the most relaxing to Kurt of all the things hed done since Hunters death, just the freedom to stretch his legs and be alone, without his parents hovering over him, searching him for tears, and giving him kisses. He loved both of them, but he would have rather spoken to his aunt about it. She was a practical woman who wouldnt lavish him with apologies and condolences, two of the many things that would make Kurt cry. Usually, he didnt mind crying if he was sad. In fact, hed wept many times about a lot of things, but he didnt want to cry about this. He wanted to be numb, because this wasnt a pain that could go away. His baby was dead, and Kurt would always be sad about it. And he couldnt cry forever.
As soon as he arrived at her front door, he exhaled heavily, knowing that he would be fine here. Opening the door, Kurt looked inside and found his aunt at the end of the stairs, and the two of them gave each other looks of relief, as if theyd been needing each other. He leapt into his aunts arms, feeling her squeeze him just as tightly, "Ive missed you." He peeped, and she stroked his hair. "Aunt Laurice, Ive missed you more than my heart could take."
"Im here." She promised him, rocking him back and forth in her protective arms. "Oh, Kurt..." Drawing away from him, she held him at arms length and looked him over. "Sweetheart..."
Kurts eyes filled, but he didnt cry. "How did you ever get along without Mère?"
His aunt held him close again, hushing him with low murmurs and nothings, "Its alright, sweetheart. Come now... lets sit down before you faint. You look so worn." Leading him into the living room, she sat him down on the couch, keeping her arms around him and rocking him as if he was a small child too afraid to go to sleep, "Your mom was amazing, wasnt she? She was good to all of us. And Hunter was like that, wasnt he?"
"He was my b-baby." Kurt pleaded, as if he was trying to convince himself that even though hed been born to Karofsky, his killer, hed been Kurt and Blaines baby. "He was my little one... my b-beautiful, little one." His aunt shushed him again, pressing a kiss to his cheek, and he nuzzled closer to her. "Im so s-scared... Were terrified to tell Archer because hes just a baby. He wouldnt understand... Hed be so sad. And Blaine cries at night, Aunt Laurice. He has horrible nightmares... sometimes he screams. My strong, brave husband... he screams for Karofsky to stop! Its like he feels helpless. And he didnt m-mean to let it happen... he tried to protect us. There was n-no way for him to stop it." As his aunt wrapped him up tighter and pulled him into her lap, he whispered, "I n-need you like I needed you when I was little... when we lost Mère."
"I know." His aunt murmured, as if she knew all of his struggles and was able to fix all of them. Leaning into her because he trusted her to make it better, he listened to her soft words, "Kurt, youre not a child anymore. Look at you... youve grown to be just as lovely as your mom. Youre just like her, you know. And you know what she would want you to do? She would want you to be there for your family as best you can. You cant be perfect for them, as much as I know you want to be. But you can be you, the person your husband fell in love with and married, and the père that Archer relies on. You and Blaine... and his Uncle Keegan... are all that he has now, Kurt. He needs you more than ever... now that he doesnt have Hunter. Your mom would want you to be your loving, silly self. No more of this black garb. Youre stronger than that."
"Its the color of grieving." Kurt whispered, looking down at his black dress with disdain.
"But its not the color of you." His aunt corrected, lifting his chin and forcing him to look into her blue eyes. "Kurt, everyone grieves differently, but youre trying to grieve for everyone. You dont like others being in pain. You never have. When your mom died, you were always the one trying to keep everyone else from crying, but you forgot that you need to cry. You need to grieve with your husband, and with your baby. You may not want to tell him now, but when you do, let him feel pain. You cant protect him from everything. He needs to let go of Hunter in his own way. Let him be him, and you be you."
Kurt frowned up at his aunt, trying to understand what she was telling him, and he finally lifted his head and pressed his lips to her cheek. "I love you, Aunt Laurice."
She hugged him again, wrapping him up tightly, "One day, years from now, youll think back to your son as you do your mom, and youll think fondly of the time you shared with him. Youll feel happy that you had him, not sad that you lost him. And youll love the way he changed you, made you into a better person. Kurt, you were wonderful before... but after you became a parent, something in you did change. And whatever it is... its the most amazing thing. Go home now... and share that side of you with your husband. I love you, little kitten."
Kurt left his aunt with a few more hugs, and many things to think about, along with how he had changed over the years. Ever since he met Blaine, his heart had been filled with so much love, but now that a part of it was missing with the absence of Hunter, he did need to be with his husband and son, and remember the baby they had lost, and fill it again with the good memories he had with that beautiful boy who was gone from hugs and kisses, but not from love. As he ran into his home, he hurried upstairs, where his husband was sitting with Archer on his bed and showering him with hugs and kisses, and he joined them and stayed in their arms for as long as he could. But they couldnt stay together forever.