April 12, 2015, 7 p.m.
Hoping One Day: Chapter 5
E - Words: 1,325 - Last Updated: Apr 12, 2015 Story: Closed - Chapters: 32/? - Created: Jun 02, 2014 - Updated: Jun 02, 2014 109 0 0 0 0
Chapter 5
Blaine cooked dinner for himself and Kurt on Thursday the next week. Their friendship, which began so easily, had progressed to an effortless companionship that Blaine was so thankful for. With the stress that hed been under lately with the pregnancy, it was a relief to have someone who treated him normally.
Since the breakup, it seemed that everyone wanted to step lightly around him, to take extra care when dealing with his emotions, and if not, conversations were almost exclusively devoted to his plans for the rest of his pregnancy, his plans for the birth, his plans for raising a child on his own. Blaine understood that he had another person to care for, and he had to be responsible, but it was incredibly overwhelming. It was like a breath of fresh air when Kurt asked him how he was before asking after the baby, or asked about work, or his day, or what he thought of some new movie or current event. It was enough to make him feel like his own person again.
"Anyway," Kurt said as he reached the end of his story about work that day. "Its late, you probably want to get some rest."
"Yeah, early day tomorrow."
Kurt grimaced in sympathy, then gestured to the kitchen. "Do you need any help cleaning up?"
Blaine shook his head, "No, Im a clean-as-you-go kind of cook. These dishes will be fine."
Blaine walked Kurt to the door, and offered him a parting smile. "Sleep well."
"You, too." Then suddenly Kurt was bridging the gap, and wrapping his arms around Blaine. Blaine sucked in a surprised gasp, but then relaxed into the pressure, squeezing back with a chuckle. Kurts voice was loud in his ear as he said, "If you need anything, you know Im right across the hall, okay?"
Blaine pulled back slightly, and said, "Of course. Thank you."
The rush of gratitude he felt at that was sharp, and he tightened his arms around Kurt quickly before he released him.
"Night," Kurt said, crossing the hall to his door.
Blaine closed the door softly behind him, fastened the chain on the door, and walked back into the kitchen. He hummed quietly to himself as he cleared away the small mess left in the kitchen, washing up cups and placing them back into the cupboard. Once he was satisfied with the state of the apartment he moved to his bedroom to get ready for bed.
He gave a huge sigh as he leant back into the pillows and pulled the blanket up to his chin.
He was so happy that he had Kurt to talk to now. Sam was his best friend, but it was different with Kurt; less comic books and role playing, and more openness and comfort. As much as he hated to admit it, he needed it now more than ever.
He was trying to be so strong about what was happening, but the truth was that this was not the way that he had envisaged his life going. Kurt helped him forget about the future that he had wanted so badly, and was showing him the life that he could have; different, but still so amazing.
Blaine was on the cusp of sleep, the moment when you could swear you were still awake, but that calm has already begun to envelop you. That was why when he was jolted awake, he couldnt realize what had woken him so suddenly. He opened his eyes to the darkness of his room, and listened hard for any small noise, but the apartment was completely silent. He had just shut his eyes once more, when he felt it; the thing that had clearly woken him. It was a sharp pressure in his stomach, gone as quickly as it came, but it was unmistakable. He put his hand to the spot where he had felt it, and almost as if to assure him, he felt it gain. His baby was kicking.
He was out of bed in a split second, tearing out of his bedroom, through the apartment, out his front door, and began frantically pounding on Kurts door. It wasnt until Kurt opened the door, bleary eyed from sleep, his hair adorably ruffled, that Blaine realized that there were tears in his eyes.
Kurt looked incredibly startled.
"Blaine," he said, opening his door completely. "Blaine, whats wrong, is there a problem?" He looked so anxious, and Blaine was quick to put him at ease.
"No, nothings wrong, just-" Blaine faltered for a second, then just reached out to grab Kurts hand, and brought it to the spot where he had felt the kick.
Kurt looked very confused, still muddled from sleep, and when nothing happened he asked, "Whats happening?"
"No, wait, I felt it!" Blaine kept Kurts hand placed to his stomach with his own. A few more seconds passed, and then he felt it again, a little to the left of where Kurts hand was, and so he readjusted it quickly, and when he felt the kick a second later, he saw the comprehension dawn on Kurts face.
He looked up at Blaine, and his eyes were wide and open. "Youve never felt him kick before?"
"Well, I could feel him move around a little, like a swooshing feeling, but never like this." Blaine could hear how choked his own voice sounded, but couldnt clear it. "Never this; hes kicking."
The smile that broke out over Kurts face mirrored the one on Blaines, and they returned their eyes to where their hands were joined on Blaines belly.
Blaine was not sure how long they stood in the hallway between their two apartments, huddled against Kurts open door, but eventually Kurt said, "Come inside, its late."
Kurt kept hold of Blaines hand in his, and lead him back into his apartment. Blaine allowed himself to be led toward the couch, and when Kurt lay down the length of the couch, he directed Blaine to lie back onto his chest. They both extended their legs, and Kurt moved his hands to Blaines stomach again, pressing to feel the movement.
Blaine allowed himself to daydream as they lay on the couch, his head resting heavily on Kurts chest, but his smile grew again when he heard Kurt.
"Wow." It was more of an exhalation than a voicing, but Blaine heard the amazement in his tone. When Blaine began speaking, it was soft and unmeasured. It was easy to talk to the dark ceiling.
"After Connor left, I was really depressed. I mean, I had Sam and Tina, and they were really great. Helping me, and encouraging me, and telling me that I could do it on my own. But, I dont think that they really understood that it wasnt just about taking care of a baby by myself. I know its going to be really hard, but I also know that I can get through it. It was the other stuff that bothered me.
"Like, in the hospital after the delivery? No one was going to be there to share that with. And when he speaks his first word, or takes his first steps. Or when he loses a tooth and I have to play tooth fairy. I had to get used to the fact that I would be experiencing those things on my own."
Blaine took a breath, and then continued. "I wanted someone who would share those firsts and understand how much they mean to me." He stopped, then moved his hands over Kurts on his stomach. "But when I felt the baby kick, I didnt think about the fact that this was another first that I had to go through alone. I didnt think at all. I just rushed over here, because I wanted you to experience it with me.
"I can see Im not going to go through this alone. I do have people who care about me. Kurt, youre a really great friend."
Blaine couldnt see Kurts face, but Kurt squeezed his hand tight, and Blaine knew that he understood. They dissolved once again into silence, and Blaine drifted.