Kurt sighed, nuzzling his nose into the other man’s shoulder.  It was still early, and Kurt didn’t want to open his eyes just yet. Just stay and breathe Julian’s smell. Mmm.

            Kurt’s legs were wrapped in the sheets, and he was afraid of moving in case he woke Julian. “Too courteous,” Julian would’ve told him if he was awake, and Kurt could imagine the wink to go along with his words.

            Kurt could feel the fingers on his bare back trailing down to his ass, and shivers were left on his skin in the path. Kurt laughed. “Awake, then, darling?” he asked.

            Julian’s eyes opened, and his dark eyes seemed to smile at Kurt. A cheeky grin stretched his lips, and he laid a kiss on Kurt’s jawline. His fingers traced circles on Kurt’s ass, and Kurt sighed. “Again, Julian? I’m still sore-“

            Julian put a finger on Kurt’s lips. “Shhhh.” Julian wrapped his fingers around the base of Kurt’s cock, stroking slowly.

            “Honey, it’s not going to take long for me to-“

            Julian gave Kurt a look that was plain. What did I tell you?

            Kurt sighed, and let himself sink into the pleasure of Julian’s hand on him.

            “Faster, Julian, please, please.”

            “Come on, baby, come on, Drew-“

            Kurt froze. Drew? Who the hell was Drew?

            Apparently, Julian hadn’t noticed he’d just called his boyfriend the wrong name. His eyes were closed and he was still into the movements of getting Kurt off.

            “Julian? Who’s Drew?”

            It was Julian’s turn to freeze up.

            “Wh-What?” Julian asked, his face slightly shocked. He sat up, his bare chest shining in the light coming in from the window.

            “That’s what you just called me,” Kurt replied, confused. What was this? His mind went in hundreds of directions. Was it just an old boyfriend? Kurt was sure it was that- just a boyfriend he hadn’t heard about.

            “Umm…” Julian mumbled, eyes darting around the room, searching. “It… It’s just a guy, don’t worry about it,” he finished off lamely, fumbling around to find Kurt’s cock. Kurt frowned and pushed his hand away.

            “No, don’t worry, who is it? I’m just curious,” Kurt pressed, frowning. The guilt in Julian’s eyes worried him- Julian never had anything to hide, Kurt knew that.

            “Okay. K-Kurt. I have to tell you something. Please, please, please, just listen, okay?” Julian looked increasingly uncomfortable. He stood up and grabbed his boxers from Kurt’s floor and slid them on and did the same with his dark wash jeans.

            “I don’t like the sound of that,” Kurt said, looking up at Julian questioningly. What could be so bad that Julian had to prep Kurt for it?

            “Oh, h-honey, I’m just so sorry,” Julian almost sobbed. Kurt climbed across the bed over to where Julian was standing, half naked, and put his arms around Julian. “I…”

            “Spit it out, love,” Kurt said, and Julian pulled away from the hug, looking into Kurt’s eyes.

            “I’ve been cheating on you.”

            Kurt stopped. He froze. It couldn’t be true. Julian, the guy who for months had put up with the stupid paparazzi, had put up with having to help Kurt keep his apartment spotless all the fucking time, had had glorious sex with Kurt on every single surface they could imagine, had taken Kurt ice skating in the winter, had said “I love you” after their third date, which had been a little early, but Kurt had known it was right.

            Cheated? It couldn’t have been that. Kurt pinched himself on the arm. He must be dreaming. Julian was perfect. Even Rachel had loved him at first sight.

            But as the tears rolled down Julian’s cheeks, Kurt became more and more confused. Was this real?

            “Wait… B-But when? Are you s-serious? Wh-what?” Kurt stammered, his eyes beginning to shine with tears.

            “It’s… It’s been a lot, Kurt, I’m so sorry, it was that Drew guy at work and he was just there and it just kind of happened.  He f-flirted so often and it was just one time and then it grew to more an-and oh, oh God, Kurt, I’m so s-sorry-“

            “No,” Kurt said, over Julian’s broken sobs. He would not stand here and fall apart in front of Julian, the man he had trusted for all this fucking time.

            Kurt stood up. He put his clothes on, ignoring the sobs from the other side of the room and the tears dripping down his own nose. Of course, this was bound to happen. The “perfect” guy was a complete dud, just like all the others in this huge damn city. Maybe he’d just wanted it for the fame? Of being with Kurt Hummel, the movie star who had struck it big on Broadway and signed on for a few movies which had all apparently been pretty good.

            It had always turned out something like this.

            Julian had collapsed with his knees on the floor, looking at him through those long, dark eyelashes. The first time he had done that, Kurt had nearly ravished him on the coffeehouse table. “Kurt, please, you have to know, I want you and it st-stopped about a month ago and I felt so bad but I knew you’d break up with me if you f-found out, and I just want th-this and y-you-”

            “P-Please leave. Just… Just go, please,” Kurt said, trying to keep the crying from sounding obvious in his voice. He didn’t need someone who was going to love him one minute and be fucking someone else on an office desk the next.

            Julian looked at him again. Julian picked up his shirt, put it on, and walked up to Kurt, looking down at him. “Kurt, I’m so sorry-“

            Kurt reached up and slapped him. Hard, to where the sound ricocheted off the bedroom walls. Satisfying, thought not as much as he hoped it would be. “YOU WERE ALL I EVER WANTED, JULIAN,” Kurt screamed, his high voice even higher, to where downstairs Ms. Lanier could hear him clearly. And finally succumbing to his tears, he yelled, “GET OUT OF MY FUCKING HOUSE.”

            Julian turned to make his way out of the bedroom.

Kurt didn’t know what was the last time he had yelled like that, but it sure as hell wasn’t lately. Everything was gone out of him. Everything had left. Nine months on that asshole and he had even been thinking about marriage. What was it that he couldn’t have gotten from Kurt? He had thought Julian loved him. What had happened that had broken them so much?

He needed to go, get away from this apartment for a while. It was filled with dead memories. He knew his dad would probably take him in for a few days, and there Kurt decided to go. Lima, Ohio, where he had started out.

            Trying hard to sound calm, Kurt said, walking out into the living room where Julian was almost out the door, “I’m leaving for a few days. Use your key to get all your stuff sometime soon. Leave the key under the doormat. Don’t come back.”

            Julian turned around to face Kurt. “O-okay,” he said slowly, through his tears. “But I d-don’t th-think you understand how s-sorry-“

            “Fuck you, Julian. I thought you were the one. Get out of my apartment. Now,” Kurt said, withholding the shouting that he desperately wanted to do. Julian left, the door slamming shut behind him, the glass lamp in the foyer trembling.

            Kurt lost it.

            Falling to the floor, he sobbed with nothing left to give, and did anyone fucking care?

            No.

            He might have thousands of fans outside these walls, but what did they want him for? Fame. All they wanted was his stupid autograph and a hug and a fuck from the goddamn phenomenal Kurt Hummel.

            No one actually gave a shit about what he wanted or how he felt or how much love he just wanted. That’s all he really wanted. One person. When millions know your name, sometimes all you want is just one person to love you truly and irrevocably.

            Kurt sighed, his tears finally letting up a little. He got up, walked into his bedroom, and picked up the small black-and-white framed photo of him and Julian. It was on a bench in the park around the corner last autumn, with red leaves crunching underfoot. Julian’s lips were pressed into a kiss at Kurt’s temple, both of them giggling while Julian’s friend Maria snapped the photo. Their arms were relaxed around each other. After that, they’d double dated with Maria and her boyfriend Robert to a burger place. They went to Kurt’s apartment afterwards and Julian and Kurt had done it against the kitchen counter.

            Kurt threw the picture down onto the floor and the glass from the frame shattered around his bare feet. It was all a lie, wasn’t it? No one could find a love of their life. It was impossible.

            Kurt stepped around the broken glass and started to pack for Ohio.