'Well, hellooooo...'

Kurt grimaced. He knew this was a bad idea. God knows how he let Santana talk him into it. Now he had an inbox full of creepy messages and he didn't feel any less single. He heard a creak and changed windows on the screen.

"Hey, sweetheart. Can't sleep?"

The little girl in the yellow nightie shook her head.

"I had a bad dream."

He sighed. He may have been single, but he was far from lonely. He reached toward his daughter.

"Oh, honey. Come here, tell me all about it."

She crawled onto his lap and he hugged her close.

"I don't remember any more. I was just scared."

"I know the feeling. Well, don't worry, baby, I've got you now."

She closed her eyes, leaned on his chest and clung to his arm as he rocked her slowly and sang her favourite lullaby. He stroked her hair gently. He didn't think about these things any more. He was the one who could stop her being scared. He was her father. Just the two of them. This was his life.

"Daddy?"

"Yeah?"

"What's that?"

She was pointing at the screen.

"Why don't you tell me?"

She stared at the screen, full of greens and yellow swirls.

"Mai... is... six. But Daddy, I'm only five."

"Not for much longer. In three weeks, you're going to be six. Can you show me six?"

She frowned, counting on her hands before holding up four fingers and two thumbs. Kurt did the same.

"That's right, honey, that's six! Did you know that six is the perfect number of fingers for... tickling little girls?"

He nosed at her neck and prodded at her ribs, making her squeal.

"You're cheating! You're using more than six, that's not fair!"

He stopped tickling and held her close. He kissed her hair. She turned to look at him.

"What's wrong?"

"Nothing. Just wanted to hug you. That okay?"

"Yeah. Love you, Daddy."

"Love you too. Now, let's get you back to bed, munchkin."

She thought about arguing. She thought better of it.

"Okay."

He hoisted her over his shoulder, making her giggle again, and carried her to her room. It was green, as she'd wanted everything to be lately, and her stuffed zebra was waiting for her on the bed. Kurt lowered her so she could push the covers back before sliding her beneath them. He knelt next to the bed.

"Now have you got Steve?"

It wasn't a typical zebra name, but she'd picked it as if it were the obvious choice to everyone but her father. 'Very well. Steve it is.'

She nodded, letting Steve's head pop up next to hers from under the duvet.

"Okay. Now, any more bad dreams and you let me know, alright?"

She nodded again.

"Good. Now, you need to go to sleep. You've got a long day tomorrow. Gimme a kiss."

She gave him a peck on the mouth.

"Mwah! Night, Daddy."

"Night, baby girl. I love you very much."

"I love you more."

He smiled and walked out, switching the light off on his way.

"Not possible."

He sank into his office chair again, clicking back onto the dreaded website. There was one new message.

"Hi. You're probably drowning in messages, but I thought I'd say hi. Twice. Just wondered if you'd want to go to a movie some time."

It sounded almost sane. Kurt clicked on the username (B-Warbler, a little weird but at least there was no 'horny' or '69' in it) and read the information.

Recently divorced dad of two. I love music, theatre and I might as well confess I'm a secret reality TV junkie. I own a bakery in Lima, Ohio. Trying to keep an open mind about the whole online dating thing.

The picture was cute. Dark hair, brown eyes, a nose that shouldn't have worked but did anyway. It was nice to see someone really smiling on here. Everyone else always seemed so serious.

He could hear Tana's voice in his head, telling him to go for it, but Kurt already had his hands full with Mai. He didn't want to risk having to take on someone else's kids, too. And recently divorced didn't sound too great. He hovered over the 'respond' button. He closed the window. He shut the laptop.

Not today. Not now. He had a long day tomorrow.

*

He probably should have tried to send a message to more than one guy. Maybe he shouldn’t have said ‘divorced’. Maybe he shouldn’t have mentioned the kids. Or the reality TV. He could give it up if he really had to.

No, he couldn’t.

He was hopeless at keeping anything a secret anyway. And he didn’t want the kids to be a secret. But that didn’t mean he wanted to let them in on what he was doing yet. He tried not to think about the lack of responses as he struggled through another awkward dinner.

“Kitty, honey, you’ve barely touched your food. Everything okay?”

His seventeen-year-old daughter pushed her broccoli around her plate.

“I don’t like it.”

“I do, Dad!” Zach spat out around a mouthful of vegetables. “It’s my favourite!”

Blaine grinned at him, wishing Kitty was eleven again.

“I know it is, champ, that’s why I cooked it! You need plenty of iron if you’re gonna kick butt tonight!”

“Yeah!” the little boy yelled, dropping his fork to give his father a high five.

“Mom would’ve done it better.”

“Mom can’t even cook, butthead.”

“Bite me, dork.”

“Guys, your mother’s a great cook. I just like doing it.”

Kitty snorted. Blaine turned back to her.

“Sweetheart, is that what you’re wearing tonight? There won’t be anybody to impress.”

“Gee, Pop, are you sure Zach’s little friends don’t have any sexy older brothers? Don’t you wanna bond with me over boy talk?”

“Kitty-“

“No, come on, Daddy, maybe there are a couple of hot dads you could sleep with.”

“Dad’s too old for sleepovers.”

“That’s not what Mom’s been telling me.”

“Honey, your mother’s upset with me. I can’t say I blame her. But whatever she’s told you, it doesn’t have anything to do with the two of you. We both still love you very much.”

“I’m not a kid. You can’t feed me that crap, just like you can’t feed me this.” She pushed her plate forward. “And I’m not going to that pathetic little play tonight. I’m going to a party. And I’m staying at Mom’s.”

Zach’s face crumpled.

“Kitty, your brother’s been working really hard for this. We’re going to support him. We can’t let that technicolour dreamcoat go to waste, can we buddy?”

“No. You promised. You said you’d come. I’m singing.”

“He’s been practising, and he’s amazing. He sang it for me last night and I cried.”

“Of course you did.”

“Yeah, dummy, because I’m really good and it’s a sad song!”

“Or maybe it’s because your precious dad is a sappy little fag!”

“Kitty, go to your room.”

“I thought you were supposed to be nice to the kids when you got divorced-“

“I will not hear that word in my house, young lady, now go to your room and later we are going to the play as a family. You’re gonna support your brother because you love him and because I’m your father and I said so.”

“You say a lot of things, Dad. Like, ‘Until death do us part’, ‘in sickness and in health’, and ‘well, just until a nice dick comes along then I’m out of here’ - wait, you never mentioned that one out loud, did you Daddy?”

“Kitty. Your room. Now.” He stared at the table, breathing slowly, as she stomped up the stairs. Zach prodded a piece of chicken with his fork.

“Dad? Are you okay?”

Blaine forced a smile.

“Sure. Sorry for yelling.”

“You didn’t yell as much as her. What was that word? Fag? What does it mean?”

Blaine winced just hearing it.

“Well, it’s just like when kids call each other names. You know how I told you about me? The fact that I’m-“

“Gay. Yup.”

Zach popped a piece of chicken into his mouth, nonplussed. Blaine smiled.

“Well, the word Kitty used is a horrible name for people like me. It’d be like me yelling at her for being blonde. It’s something she can’t change.”

“She could dye her hair. It’d look weird, though.”

“Yeah, it would. Just like me being married to your mom was weird, because I wasn’t being honest about who I was. I’m sorry it’s made them both so angry, but I have to be honest.”

“So you were lying before?”

Blaine frowned.

“Yeah, kind of. Because I didn’t like being this way. But if I’d never married your mom then I wouldn’t have the two of you, and I love you both more than anything in the world.”

“Even Kitty?”

Blaine tried not to smile.

“Yeah, even Kitty. I’m upset that she used that word, but I still love her.”

“Okay. I’m upset that Mom’s upset, but I still love you.”

“Awesome. Okay, we should finish up here, or we’re gonna be late. Is your costume hanging up?”

Zach was about to answer when he flinched at the sound of Kitty running back down the stairs.

“Kitty! I told you, you’re not going to that party! You made a commitment.”

“No! You don’t get to tell me what to do any more, okay, you’re the one who tore this family apart, not me! I’ll be back whenever I fucking feel like it!”

He dropped the dishes in the sink and ran after her, grabbing her arm as she opened the door. He slammed it shut.

“Don’t you dare talk to me like that! Does your mother even know about this party?”

“She knows I’ll be at her place by the morning. She actually lets me have some freedom.”

“Freedom? No, no, you have to earn freedom, Kitty, you have to let your parents know where you’re going to be so that we know you’re safe, and so we can trust you not to do anything dangerous.”

“What, something dangerous like have fun? Like not want to kill myself from fucking boredom at some school play? And you’re one to talk about trust, Father, out looking for twinks while your wife waits at home for you-“

“I’m not talking about this any more. You’re not going.”

She glared at him. His hand stayed firmly on the door.

“If you don’t open this door, I’ll leave. I don’t just mean tonight. I’ll go live with Mom, and you’ll never see me again. Maybe I’ll call child protective services, tell them my pervert dad’s been grabbing me.”

Blaine let go of her wrist immediately.

“Kitty, that’s not funny.”

“No, what would be really funny would be getting them to take Zach away too. The one you actually like. Then we’ll be with Mom, and you’ll be in jail.”

“Is that really how you think this works? The courts placed you with me. I fought for you. This is your home.”

“Mom’s my home. You’re barely even my father any more.”

Blaine stood, speechless, as she walked out, slamming the door behind her.

“It’s okay, Dad. I only care about you seeing the play anyway.”

Blaine ran his fingers through his hair and took a deep breath before turning to face Zach.

“Honey, you do like-” Living with me, right? No. You can’t ask him that. It’s not fair. “your costume, right? It’s the right size?”

“Uh-huh. It’s awesome. All the other kids only get to wear one colour.”

Blaine smiled weakly.

“Good. Come on, let’s go. It’s time for your big debut!”