Chapter 25: Girly
TPD: Born This Way

"So I'm putting 'likes boys.'"

"Why?" Blaine asked.

Kurt shrugged and looked a little uncomfortable. "I mean. I'm gay, and I don't want to change that, but it's caused... so much pain. Sometimes I think that, if I liked girls, everything would be better. My dad loves me, but I know he would have picked a straight son if he could. I mean- I'm not saying he'd ever change me or that he wishes I were different. I just."

"It's okay," Blaine interrupted. "I think I know what you mean. And that makes sense."

"What about you?" Kurt asked. "What would yours say?"

Vagina popped into his head before he could stop it. "I dunno," he said uncomfortably.

"Sorry," Kurt responded immediately. "You don't have to answer that. I mean, if-"

"No, it's alright," Blaine assured him. "I just wasn't expecting-"

"Whatever it is, I'm pretty sure it's not important. I mean- not-"

"It's okay," Blaine interrupted again. "I know what you meant."

"Good." Kurt relaxed into the sofa and slipped his hand into Blaine's. "So what should we do today? I feel like we have movie dates too much. We're going to become one of those boring old married couples if we don't inject some variety soon."

"What's wrong with boring old married couples?" Blaine teased.

"Fiddler on the Roof?"

"Well, if you insist."

Kurt got up to find the DVD and put it in the player. Blaine liked the Hummel-Hudson house. It was warm and homey. His parents valued expensive things and cutting edge design, so their house felt cold and professional. Even Dalton's penchant for tradition and rules felt warmer than his parents' house. He didn't want to go back there.

Kurt sat back down next to him as the menu screen came up and he leaned forward for the remote. They didn't quite cuddle as much here, but they sat close enough that it was the next best thing. Like any responsible parent, Kurt's dad wasn't a fan of them being too... intimate... at their age.

Blaine realized that the other reason he liked their movie dates so much more than going out for coffee or dinner or to see a show was that he wasn't afraid of showing affection for his boyfriend. He wasn't afraid to just hold his hand (and that reminded him, they weren't holding hands and he had to fix that) or sit close enough that their shoulders were touching.

He trusted Kurt. He definitely loved Kurt even if he hadn't said it yet. The last thing he wanted to do was scare him off, though it didn't seem likely that he would. Blaine just wanted to take things as slow as he could. The slower they went, the longer it would last. He would have to trust Kurt if he wanted this to work. Eventually Kurt was going to find out, and he had to trust his boyfriend to love him unconditionally otherwise what was the point in their relationship?

That's why, halfway through the movie, he suddenly said "Girly."

"What?" Kurt asked distractedly.

"That's what my shirt would say," Blaine stated. "Girly."

Kurt was giving Blaine his undivided attention now, and scoffed a little. He stared, as if waiting for Blaine to laugh or deliver the punchline. "Blaine, you're not even a little girly. You... You like football, and you're athletic, and you know how to do things with cars..."

"I don't like football all that much, actually," Blaine confessed. "I follow it because I want to fit in. I do a lot of things like watch football because it makes me feel less girly. I'm... terrified of being perceived as feminine. I mean. There's nothing wrong with being feminine or being female. I'm just... not."

"Definitely not," Kurt agreed. He leaned a little bit closer. "Thank you."

"For telling you I'm afraid of being girly?"

"For... trusting me."

Blaine smiled shyly at that. "You're wonderful."

"I'm missing the movie is what I am."

"Please," Blaine scoffed. "How many times have you seen this?"

"At least seven times," Kurt replied and they laughed.

Blaine pulled Kurt into a hug. This was good. This felt good.

He definitely had to keep this.