
March 5, 2012, 2:21 p.m.
March 5, 2012, 2:21 p.m.
"I'm gay" – Blaine repeated, shaking.
Blaine's mom was staring at him, fighting back the tears.
"No, you are not Blaine", said Blaine's father with authority. "You cannot be that. I didn't raise a fag."
Blaine's mom was silently looking at the old man, avoiding her son eyes as much as she could.
"Dad, it's still me. I'm still the same person I was five minutes ago. This doesn't change who I am. It's still me dad. Can't you see me? I'm still your son. Please, say something"
"Except it does. Get out of here. Go to your room. I'm gonna get these stupid ideas out of your mind even if I have to beat them out of you, you hear me? Now GO." – He said as he punched the table with his fist.
Blaine couldn´t fight the tears anymore. He ran upstairs with the words of his father echoing in his head. "I´ve raised no fags!. I'VE RAISED NO FAGS!"
"I'm not a fag!"- he said loudly as he shut the door behind him. Every single thing is his room reminded him of how much his dad has done to try and mold him into the way his father wanted him to be. From the polo trophies, to the fencing pictures hanging on his walls, his personal interests have been shadowed by his father's impositions. He needed to get out of there and find some peace; he knew he meant it when he said he'll beat those thoughts out of him. He had never hit him before, but the look in his eyes was enough. He was serious, furious, and what hurt him the most, he was ashamed of having him as a son.
He sat on his bed and cried, remembering how his father had changed his mind in two weeks…
"And the first prize goes to, our champion, Blaine James Anderson!"- said the host, as he gave Blaine the trophy.
His parents were running to where he was, the whole crowd still clapping.
"That's my son", James Anderson said proudly. "That's my son! I'm so proud of you Blaine, you have only been training for a year, and here you are, fencing state champion!"
"You won honey!" his mother said as she kissed him affectionately on the cheek. "Come on, let's go home. I'll make your favorite dinner. We have to tell your brother! He asked me to let him know as soon as the championship was over. He would have come, but teachers at Yale are so strict about letting students miss classes."
In that moment, he knew. He pulled out a backpack and quickly filled it with clothes. He needed to get out of that place, and Cooper won't say no to him staying over for a while. He didn't want to think about how he was gonna tell Coop he was gay, but he couldn't get any angrier than his dad. He had always been the calm one anyway, always supporting him and covering for him in any mischief he might have done. And besides, he had no other choices. He couldn't stay there, he needed time.
Blaine waited until they fell asleep, and quickly got out. He already had a cab waiting outside the next house.
"Where to?"- the driver said, yawning.
"Yale"- he said.
He kept thinking about how he was going to explain to Cooper what just happened, and imagining how he would react when he found out. "You gotta do it", he said to himself, tears slowly running down his face.
"Here we are"- the driver said, looking at him.
"Thanks, keep the change" – Blaine said as he gave him the money and slowly got out of the car.
There he was, standing in the middle of the campus. He had no idea how to get to Cooper's building since he had never come to visit him before. Well, not on campus at least. After much asking, and of course a lot of staring (because what's a 14 year old boy doing at Yale at 11pm on a Friday?), he finally got there. It was really quiet in the hall, probably because most people were out partying. Oh god, what if Coop isn't here? Blaine thought to himself.Stop it Blaine, just knock. Besides, you have nowhere else to go.
After staring at the door for a minute, he finally knocked.
"Go away!"-
There was giggling in the background. It seemed like he had company.
"Hey, it's …it's me. Blaine."
Everything went silent for a minute. Then he could suddenly hear people walking around. God, he had a girl in there!
The door opened slightly, and there was Cooper, shirtless and worried.
"Blaine, what on earth are you doing here? Is everything okay? Did something happen to mom and dad?" he stared at his brother, who had started crying.
"I, I ran away Coop…he doesn't want, he, he doesn't want me there…" Blaine managed to say, before he started crying like he never cried before.
"It's okay B, it's okay, come on, let's go buy some coffee and get some air so we can talk okay?" he said while hugging him protectively.
"Okay, I'm, I'm sorry Coop, I know there is a girl in there. I, I didn't mean to…"
"Uh yeah", he said nervously. "But, shh, it's okay, family first. Always."
Cooper grabbed a T- shirt and a jacket, and hugged Blaine while walking to the coffee shop. Blaine kept walking along side with him, but neither of them talked. Cooper got two medium drips and started walking down to the dorm. Blaine was still crying.
They got to the dorm, and Cooper came in first, checking there was nobody there. He had the room for himself, after all, he was the first student in his class and this was his last semester.
"Come on little man, let's talk", he said handling the coffee to Blaine.
"Thanks" Blaine said…
"So, what did you do B? You haven't pulled any big pranks since you tried to come with me on a road trip 5 years ago, and somehow managed to hide in the car until we got to the next state. Dad was chasing after us for about four hours before I realized you were in the car…and…I'm starting to have a feeling that this isn't as minor and simple as that."
"I, well we, we had a fight."
"Yep, that's pretty clear to me, but I want to know why."
Come on, say it. He is the only one who can help you. He has always been there for you. He even kicked a girl out of his room for god's sake.
"We had a fight, because, because I told them…that I'm…I'm gay." He finally said, with tears pouring out of his eyes…
"He…he said he didn't raise a fag, and that it couldn't be true. He said he will get those ideas out of my head even if he had to beat them out of me. He told me to go, so I did."
"It's okay B, it's okay. I love you no matter what; this doesn't change who you are, or how special you are to me. You are a brave little man. Much braver than you think you are." – Cooper said, as Blaine cried in his arms.
He knew the feeling. He knew what it felt like to be called a fag. He knew what it was like to feel like no one in the world understood you. He knew what it felt like when society refused to believe that love wasn't possible between people of the same gender. How have I not noticed before? "Because you were away, you idiot."- he said to himself- "You ran away and left him. You had no idea what was going on with him. You had no idea that you two were so much alike. You are a coward Cooper. He just did what you never had the strength to do… and he lost everything.
No, he has you. You'll tell him eventually, but this is not the time".
Cooper hugged his little brother, and cried with him as he whispered "It's ok B, It's gonna be fine. I love you Kiddo, no matter what"