Nov. 7, 2012, 2:49 p.m.
Kill My Darling: I Still Love You
M - Words: 2,153 - Last Updated: Nov 07, 2012 Story: Closed - Chapters: 19/? - Created: Mar 27, 2012 - Updated: Apr 13, 2022 459 0 3 0 0
"Blaine remembers when in high school when you'd make me playlist for everything?" Kurt asked smiling at Blaine as they entered the highway towards Lima.
"Of course I do!" Blaine smiled cheezily to Kurt, "that's what you did in the 2000's."
"Well I made you a playlist on my phone cause that's what we do in the 2020's." Kurt laughed as Blaine turned the stereo up.
Kurt started to sing to Blaine. "Found myself today singing out loud your name. You said I'm crazy, if I am I'm crazy for you. Sometimes sitting in the dark wishing you were here turns me crazy, but it's you who makes me lose my head. And every time I'm meant to be acting sensible you drift into my head and turn me into a crumbling fool. Tell me to run and I'll race. If you want me to stop I'll freeze. And if you want me gone, I'll leave. Just hold me closer, baby, and make me crazy for you. Crazy for you." Blaine leaned over and kissed Kurt softly. He turned back to the road and enjoyed the music and the power of cruise control.
They we at peace with each other as they pulled up to the house. Blaine turned the engine off and looked over at Kurt.
"Blaine, no matter what happens in there, next weekend we are going to new York and getting married. You are the love of my life, I have already spent half of my life with you I want to spend it all with you. Nothing they say will change my mind. I believe in you, I trust you." Kurt said holding Blaine's hands.
Blaine bit back tears as he spoke, "I don't know how I was so lucky to find you, Kurt. You are the love of my life, you loved me even when I didn't deserve your love. You stayed by me through everything someday I wish I could do it all over again and chose a better path but no matter where I go I know you are right by my side. So many times in St. Peter's I thought why then your letter would come in and that's why. You are the reason I live, without you I am nothing." Kurt didn't need another word he leaned over and kissed him.
Blaine melted into the kiss his hand holding Kurt’s cheek it sent him back 15 years. In the very drive way were they promised forever and a few years after.
"I had a lot of fun tonight Blaine." Kurt said as Blaine stopped the car and put it in park.
"So your not going to hate me in the morning?" Blaine smiled.
"Disco sucks, but I will go rollerblading with you 1000 time and a few more after that." Kurt said taking Blaine's hand.
"I love you." Blaine said.
"Blaine you are the love of my life. 15 years from now we will be married with two little girls. You will be a history teacher and I will be a real state agent. We will come home ever weekend for family dinner. And 40 years after that we will be silly grandparents giving our grandkids too much sugar ignoring our daughters protest." Kurt said interrupted by Blaine's laugh.
"You have this all planed out." Blaine concluded, Kurt nodded his head and Smiled. "You messed up, see I will be the teacher but you will be famous. Broadway legend hosting the tony awards. We'll be the new Neil and David." Kurt blushed and smiled.
Blaine looked at the clock, "I only have 4 minutes to kiss you." He frowned. Kurt shook his head and removed his phone from his pocket texting his dad.
"Now you have ten." Kurt said setting the phone in the empty cup holder pulling Blaine's face to his.
"I will love you forever Kurt Hummel."
"And a few years after?"
"And a million years after."
"Lets get this over with." Kurt pulled away and reached in the back seat for pie. Blaine stepped out of the car shivering at the crisp fall night. He took Kurt’s hand and walked up to the door. They shared a glance and sigh as Kurt rang the door bell.
"Its warm tonight, I hope it snows." Blaine murmured looking at the sky.
"Its still too early for snow dear." Kurt said as the door opened sending cold air inside and hot air out.
"Hey boys." Carol said warmly. "You're just in time for dinner." She stepped aside and let the boys in.
"We brought pie," Blaine said watching Kurt hand it to carol.
"It looks delicious, I hope I whip cream." She left the living room down the hall to the kitchen.
"Is it to late to leave?" Kurt whispered to Blaine as he removed his jacket.
"Afraid so, but I think Finn's here with someone." Blaine said hanging his and Kurt’s jacket on the rack. Blaine took Blaine's hand and followed the smell of chicken down the hall.
A young woman laughed as Blaine and Kurt turned the corner. Finn had his arm draped around a tall fit woman with a dreaming smile.
"Maddie, this is my step brother Kurt and his fianc� Blaine." Finn said, "guys this is my girlfriend Madeline."
"You have a beautiful smile," Blaine commented shaking her hand.
"Thank you." She said uncomfortable looking at Finn and taking his hand.
"How long have you been dating?" Kurt asked his brother.
"4 months." He said with a smile looking down at her.
"Baby I'm going to help your mom set the table." She said kissing him before disappearing to the dining room.
"She's lovely," Kurt said, "I didn't know you were going to be here much less with a date."
"Mom called last night and told us to come over," Finn shrugged.
Kurt sighed and Blaine put his arm around Kurt’s waist kissing his cheek. "I don't think this will go very well." Kurt mumbled to Blaine.
"We have to try. Courage." Blaine whispered back.
"Dinner is ready," Madeline called. Finn walked in right away but Kurt and Blaine were hesitant. The entered the room and Blaine pulled Kurt’s chair out, carol set the last dish on the table and walked down the hall to get her husband. Blaine sat across from Madeline but she turned her body to look at Finn.
Carol and Burt came into the room sitting at the heads of the table. "Lets eat," carol said lifting the plate of chicken and setting a leg on her plate then passing it down to Madeline.
"This looks amazing carol." Blaine said as he took the plate of snap peas.
"Thank you Blaine," she said calmly, "its nice to have the family all together."
"I agree," Kurt said looking at his father but Burt remained silent as he pilled food on his plate. Dinner was awkwardly silent Madeline whispering things to Finn as forks clinked with plates.
Blaine felt the scrutiny as he ate around his food finding the silence unbearding but he could find a single word to say. Every conversation he started ended Madeline didn't like then and it was obvious but no one said a thing.
"Dad, carol, Blaine and I have good news." Kurt said as dinner just wrapped up.
"What's going on?" Carol asked.
"Kurt and I are going to new York next weekend to get married and we want you two to go." Blaine said very calmly.
"No," Burt finally spoke. "You haven't even been out of rehab that long. I don't want you two together much less getting married."
"We are getting married regardless, Blaine just wanted to invite you." Kurt said hotly even though he was ready to cry.
"We're no going." Burt said in a firm voice, Kurt turned to look at carol.
"I'm sorry Kurt." She mumbled.
"Why? He did exactly what you two wanted! He is clean." Kurt said growing upset.
"Forget it Kurt," Blaine said putting his hand over Kurt, "if they don't want to come then fine." Kurt shook his head and bit back tears.
"He is the only person I have ever loved and because we had a few shity years you're going hate him for the rest of our life?" Kurt said wiping the tears away.
"Yes he has hurt you before who's to say he wont do it again." Carol said.
"I say!" Blaine shouted, "I know what I did was wrong but I have been substance free for 7 months, I am in control."
"For now," Burt said, "doesn't your CD come out this week?"
"Yeah, what does that have to do with anything?"
"You spend enough time with Jim you'll relapse." Burt said, "I don't support you marrying my son and that's that."
Kurt scooted out of his chair, "fine I don't need your blessing. But don't expect to see me again." Blaine ross and followed after Kurt. They got to the doorway and Kurt was too frustrated to get his jacket on so he left with it half on and his scarves in his hand. Blaine did the same thing as he followed Kurt to the car.
"Give me the keys I want to drive." Kurt said hotly. Blaine knew it wasn't him Kurt was mad at so he didn't look into his tone.
"Kurt you're in no condition to drive, darling." Blaine said softly. Kurt leaned on the cold car and buried his face in his hand and started sobbing. Blaine set his stuff on the car and pulled Kurt into a hug. Kurt cried into his shoulder holding Blaine tightly shaking.
Blaine held Kurt back feeling Kurt’s pain in his sobs Blaine felt that everything was his fault. He knew Kurt loved him and if he left again no good would come of it. Kurt was his home, whether they were living in a grand mansion or a small Dalton dorm, as long as Blaine was with Kurt he was happy.
"Lets go home," Blaine mumbled to Kurt picking him up and walking to the passenger side of the car and setting Kurt in. Blaine hassled to the driver side throwing their jackets in the back seat before driving back to Westerville. He played piano melodies on his Pandora watching Kurt fall asleep.
Blaine brought Kurt inside and slipped him out of his shoes and jeans. Blaine was going to join him but he wasn't tired so.he walked to his studio and wrote a song.
He sat at his piano and began softly, "If we walk away now There's no turning around Gotta say what I need While you're here with me I'm not sure I'll find words To cover the hurt That I see in your eyes But I gotta try I know that rocks turn to sand And hearts can change hands And you're not to blame When the sky fills with rain But if we stay or walk away There's one thing that's true I still love you I still love you Can you search down inside Let go of your pride If I forget trying to win And just let you in I didn't travel this far To watch it all fall apart So give me your hand And take a chance I know rocks turn to sand And hearts can change hands And you're not to blame When the sky fills with rain But if we stay or walk away There's one thing that's true I still love you Riding to me as close as before Whatever happens I won't ask for more Here in my heart From now 'til the end Flame out or fly We have to try again I still love you.
"You always write amazing songs." Kurt said from the door.
Blaine turned around and whipped the tears that were trickling down his cheeks. "Thank you, I thought you were sleeping."
"I don't sleep well without you beside me." Kurt confessed. Blaine turned his piano off and walked to Kurt.
"I'm here now," he said softly kissing Kurt. Kurt held Blaine face and spoke, "I love you so much. Nothing you can do will make me change my feeling. Nothing anyone can do will change these feeling and this time next week, I will be married to the best musician in all of north America." He kissed Blaine's and lead him back to there room and cuddled until the sun rose.
Comments
Beautiful chapter
STOP KILLING ME! I JUST HATE YOU AND THIS AND UGH! D:
I love you too :-)