Ive excused you for a while

While Im wide-eyed

And Im so down caught in the middle

And a lion, a lion, roars would you not listen?

If a child, a child cries would you not forgive them?

Strong by London Grammar

Blaine was so curious about what James was doing in the apartment opposite that he was nearly late to meet Tessa for an early dinner. He watched curiously as James picked up the remains of Kurts conversation with Blaine on the bed and looked at it in confusion. He glanced at Blaines apartment window where Blaine suddenly pretended to be busy and then James seemed to carry on with his day. He made a few phone calls but it was only when the afternoon was wearing onwards and Blaine was thinking about finishing the song he had written earlier that James decided to madly dash about the bedroom. He popped out for groceries and when he returned Blaine spotted him bringing in various objects into the bedroom: a big bouquet of flowers, petals spread across the bed haphazardly as well as candles dotted on surfaces. Blaine realised as he watched on that James was creating the perfect apology dinner date. He briefly wondered how Kurt would take it all, secretly hoping he wouldnt forgive easily, and then Kurt returned.

---

Kurt smelt the dinner first, his favourite home cooked meal and he noticed the tray of baby cupcakes standing on the side in the kitchen where James was donning an apron to finish off the dinner. He wanted to smile at the effort but he was still mad. James turned round.

"Youre here," he said, instantly rushing to Kurt to remove his coat and satchel. "Put your feet up and Ill bring you a drink."

James brought over a glass of wine while Kurt sat down, watching carefully, not saying a word.

"How was your day?" James asked as if nothing had happened this morning. Kurt decided to play along for now.

"It was ok," Kurt said, "We rehearsed the main number at least twenty times and someone from costume had an argument with a guy that does hair. Another day really."

"You really should try and get out of that role, audition for Broadway." James was still cooking, his back turned so that he couldnt see Kurts eyes roll. The same old conversation.

"Not this again," Kurt said and James instantly turned around in slight panic.

"No, not this again," he said, "I just dont get why you rely on small productions when you could be trying for Broadway. You dont push yourself to be better." There was no mention that Kurt was worth more; just that he wasnt trying hard enough. Kurt sighed.

"I like working there, building a project from scratch like that and seeing it grow. The fight to get it in a theatre, the desperation to try to bring it to Broadway: it makes you want it more; it makes you see the good in the production. I believe in it wholeheartedly."

James watched Kurt who spoke about it all with such enthusiasm, his eyes lit up and James couldnt dissuade him of its merit.

"Talking of Broadway arent you going to be late?"

"Jake is going on tonight," James said casually but Kurt was instantly up out of his seat.

"What? Why did you do that?" Kurt exclaimed, "Youll get into trouble."

"No I wont, I called in sick," James said matter-of-factly. "I did it for you, I wanted to spend the evening with my boyfriend." He looked a little smug, like he was expecting a pat on the back.

"You didnt have to do that," Kurt said with tiredness in his voice. He came closer into the kitchen and James twirled to face him fully, a little sauce on his cheek which Kurt removed deftly with his thumb. Kurt tried to smile but it came across as weak, too tired to even try. James gripped his arms as if he might fly away and he had to keep Kurt still.

"I shouldnt have shouted this morning, I was angry and really hung over," James said, "I dont even remember half of what happened last night and you know what I get like when Im ill." Kurt nodded. He did know. "Im making this dinner to make up for being absent last night, this will be our first proper evening in our new place. Let me do this." James was pleading silently with his eyes, waiting for the right answer, hoping. Kurt couldnt let him down.

Kurt nodded and his lips curved into a smile, letting James know he was forgiven. He started to set the table while James continued and it was only when he started to pour the wine that he realised James had never apologised.

---

"So Ruby knows Im gay right?" Blaine whispered in Tessas ear as the British roommate went to the toilet. Tessa smirked.

"Yes, I explained that youre waiting for the right guy just like she is," Tessa said, "You should have seen the look of disappointment on her face."

She was messing with him but it still took a beat of silence for Blaine to realise, his eyes suddenly crinkling with Ive been caught and she laughed in earnest.

"Not every straight girl is after you, just me," she finished, looping her arm inside Blaines, cosying up and resting her cheek on his shoulder. It was a dance they had done for a long time. Whenever Tess or Blaine were single they relied on the other for comfort and affection. It was always so easy to give and receive and this was a rare occasion when they were both available. Hugs and gentle touches were common, spreading warmth and easy affection, kisses on cheeks that lingered a little too long but always just on the line between affection and taking it further. It was comforting and neither really thought about what it meant, just quietly accepting.

Sam came back from the bar, having finished his set and spending most of his time talking to the owner. He laughed at the warm cosy sight in front of him and sat down.

"I never really understand why you dont just hook up," Sam said, his eyes full of lightness and mirth, his comment causing their arms to disengage and the stiffness in Blaines back to return.

"Im too good for Blaine, hes not in my league," Tessa joked, the comment hiding a real sense of awkward as she placed her hand on her own knee. Blaine knew what she was saying and why, so placed his own hand on top of hers, squeezing with affection and smiling.

"Not at all," he said, "I just prefer cock." There was a beat of silence, Blaines face so deadpan, then the table erupted in laughter as Ruby returned.

"What did I miss?" Ruby asked and they were too far gone to reply coherently. She shrugged and gave up, sitting down and sipping her drink. "Where are we off to now then?" she said instead, "The nights still young."

"I dont know," Blaine said, chancing a glance at his watch, "I should probably be getting back."

"Someone pressing to go back to?" Sam asked, a chuckle on his lips but then Blaines face fell serious and he shook his head.

"There is a new couple that have moved across from me though, in the apartment opposite," Blaine said thinking, his eyes suddenly unseeing, the first time he had thought of Kurt all evening. Sam raised an eyebrow.

"Youve been peering in?"

"No, no," Blaine said, returning to the room, "They just havent bought curtains or blinds and I can see right through. I didnt mean to."

"Yeah right, you big stalker," Tess joked.

"No, no its not like that," Blaine said seriously, his eyes wide in order to convince them. "I caught him dancing and he spotted me singing in the bathroom last night but then this morning his boyfriend returned."

"Oh?" Ruby said, pressing closer, intrigued and no one thought anything of it. She was suddenly part of the group too and only Tessa briefly thought how quickly she had managed it.

"Yeah, he was a little off, clearly hungover and they shouted for a while then he pushed Kurt backwards," Blaine said.

"Kurt?" Tessa said.

"Yeah, he wrote his name on card, we introduced ourselves," Blaine said, "I wanted to check he was ok."

Sam nodded. "Be careful Blaine, you dont want to get involved in any domestic fights, you dont know this guy."

Blaine didnt say what was on the tip of his tongue. He did feel like he knew him. He recognised parts of himself in the guy in the apartment opposite and he intrigued him. He gave a tight smile then shook his head. The conversation was over.

"Yeah youre probably right," Blaine said laughing, "Ill head back though. He stood and kissed Tess and Ruby on the cheek, hugging Sam as they bopped shoulders. "See you tomorrow at Tonys?" Sam and Tessa nodded, Ruby looking thoughtful until she jogged to catch Blaine up by the door.

"Blaine," she said, catching his elbow, causing him to turn in surprise. "If this Kurt is being abused, even emotionally, make sure you help," she said and Blaine was taken aback. "I know how alone you can feel when something like that happens." She revealed nothing else and Blaine stood silently. "He wont want to tell anyone he knows, he wont want to disappoint people or seek help."

He nodded solemnly, taking the advice seriously and she took his acceptance, happy that he understood. She turned to go back to Tess and Sam until Blaine gently touched her shoulder.

"Ruby are you ok?"

Her eyes softened and she nodded. "I am now Blaine, thanks."

She said nothing else and Blaine stood by the door for a moment, thinking about what her past could possibly have dealt her. He walked home enjoying the chill, his coat brought in closer and his scarf trapping the heat by his neck.

As he came closer to his apartment, he looked up to see Kurts bathroom light still on and travelling up to his apartment he wondered how James apology dinner had gone. As he took off his jacket and placed it into his wardrobe he noticed Kurt and James still hadnt purchased curtains and his question of earlier was suddenly answered.

It was only just light enough, shimmers of candlelight, for Blaine to see shapes of bodies and shaky movements but it took only a few seconds for him to realise what he was inadvertently watching. They were making up in the best way possible and Blaine felt instant sickness in the pit of his stomach that it hadnt been harder for Kurt to forgive. He felt sad that Kurt had let James come back in so easily then he remembered he hardly knew them, had only watched a fight, no other cosy interaction and didnt know their relationship at all. He blinked in shock as he realised what he was accidentally watching and he hastily closed his own curtains in disgust.

---

"You taste of icing," James murmured against the corner of Kurts lips, licking the spot as if to chase the taste and Kurt giggled as James fingers traced along the skin at his waist. Eventually when he was done teasing, James fingers travelled lower to the soft warm skin of Kurts inner thigh and Kurt mewled in pleasure, James knowing exactly what drove him crazy. He screwed his eyes shut and moaned loudly as James started to tease his hole.

"Fuck Kurt, the sounds you make," James moaned watching in awed fascination despite the number of times they had done this. He lubed his fingers and pushed in, stroking Kurts cock with his other hand. Kurt was taking and taking, giving nothing back and after a while Kurt realised and tried to sit up slightly.

"Let me…" he started as if he wanted to take over, give something back but James gently pushed him so he lay again on his back.

"No Kurt, this is for you," James whispered, "Let me take care of you."

There was a gentleness in James voice that Kurt hadnt heard in a while so he let him continue, thrusting now two fingers inside of him and stroking his cock gently, teasingly slowly. It wasnt enough and it soon had Kurt begging for more.

"What shall I do to you my pretty little boyfriend?" James whispered near his ear, "What do you want?"

Kurt didnt know. There was a vague feeling of grasping and searching at the back of his mind that he couldnt quite reach and didnt understand but he moaned loudly at the pleasure that James talented fingers were causing. He wanted to feel something more but didnt know how to ask and finally settled for a fail-safe.

"Fuck me," Kurt moaned and James kneeled, slowly stroking Kurts cock but removing his fingers from Kurts hole. Kurt vaguely thought back to when he had called it making love but shook his head against the feeling that this was never going to be that. They had been together two years now and it felt good, they knew how to make each other moan and come gloriously. No need for hyperbole and terms of endearment. Time was often of the essence and leading busy lives they would often fuck with perfunctory ease. James entered Kurt easily once lube had been applied and it was good and Kurt let the pressure build quickly, James thrusting hard and fast, no slow movements now, no slow enjoyment, only a rushing to orgasm and a race to finish. Kurt knew the signs that James was close, his face tight, his stomach muscles quivering and Kurt thrust his hips upwards in order to reach that moment at the same time. James no longer told Kurt when he was close and he soon came, hard and fast inside Kurt who chased that feeling a little before he too was being stroked quickly and shooting come over their stomachs.

James was quickly out, no lingering moment between them and Kurt winced as the feeling of emptiness returned. James was cleaning himself off in their bathroom, letting Kurt remain in his sticky mess and humming to himself. He seemed satisfied and Kurt was glad at least that they were back to how things were before.

"Whos Blaine by the way?" James asked from the bathroom and Kurt sat up quickly. He instantly knew the name but hadnt a clue how James knew it too.

"What?" Kurt said, pretending ignorance, biding his time.

"The card you left on the bed," James continued, "You were writing messages?"

"Oh that," Kurt said, trying to sound casual, glad that James couldnt see his face, "Hes the guy from across the street, in the apartment opposite. He saw us earlier and introduced himself."

James came back into the room, the candlelight eerily silhouetting him, making him appear dark and ominous as he stood by the bathroom door.

"He saw us?" His voice was cold.

"Yeah," Kurt said, his voice wobbly, "He saw us fighting but I reassured him and theres no worries." He tried to sound upbeat, desperate to return things to normal, though he wasnt sure what that was anymore.

James nodded in the darkness then went back to the bathroom to fetch Kurt some tissues. He threw them lightly at Kurts stomach as he returned to bed, blowing all the candles out on his way. Only darkness remained.

"Its a bit strange that someone should introduce themselves across the apartment," James said quietly, trying to gauge Kurts own feeling about the subject. Kurt tried for lightness once again.

"Oh I dont think he meant anything by it," he said. "Just being friendly I suppose."

James nodded again and turned over so his back was now facing Kurt.

"Ok, goodnight then," he said, the slight warmth of earlier completely gone. James had gotten the forgiveness he had wanted, his hunger sated he went to sleep easily and Kurt lay there for a few hours, hearing the ticking of the clock in the darkness and wondering how he could possibly save a relationship that was slowly slipping out of his hands.