Blaine loved the weight of the punch bag as he pounded hard, and the tight pain in his biceps as the punches landed on their target. His hair, normally so confined and styled perfectly, was curly at the front as sweat sprung out on his face. With a clenched jaw, he took out his frustrations on the bag, imagining the faces of bullies and taking it as the bag came back. No one would beat him again, he wouldnt let them win.

His prestigious school, full of spoiled brats with far too much money, had a superb gym and boxing facility, one of its many perks. He trained every day before class, as his evenings were filled with study and any one of the many clubs to which he belonged. Blaine Anderson made it his priority to succeed in every single part of his life. There was no place for failure or lacklustre achievement. He was to be the best.

It was tiring though, living this life where it was only worth ringing home when he had received an accolade or passed with flying colours. School life was a pre-cursor to his real life, not the party where friends were made and dreams were wished for. His days were filled with achievements or preparations for greatness; nothing had the sole purpose of fun. He found his days were lonely when he was left to his own thoughts, so he rarely allowed himself time alone. He would end up in his dorm room at curfew only to sleep and start again the following day. His friends were boys like him, preparing for businesses their fathers owned or careers that were planned for them. Occasionally one of the guys would choose a different path, but they were always successful, always a high wage earner. Lawyers, doctors, accountants – all came out of Beaumont Academy. Greatness breeds greatness.

His glee club had been cancelled this week, no rehearsals due to illness in the council, and Blaine filled his time with more training. Less time to think, more time to feel that solid weight against his clenched fists. He came back to his single dorm, after dinner and a shower, and lay on his bed fully clothed. He was too wired to sleep, he knew, so he didnt even bother to change into his monogrammed pajamas. It was the night before his seventeenth birthday and no amount of punching was going to let him forget that. He stared at the ceiling, kept imagining he could feel the itch along his palm. He would check in the glow of his desk light and look away in disappointment. There was only one person he knew at his school that he would be slightly interested in, but though they had shared a kiss on a sort-of date, Blaines heart wasnt in it. He knew, though he didnt want to admit it, that the connection between them was so weak that he could never be his soulmate.

After a while, noises outside his room died down and he could think properly. Memories of long ago forgotten conversations, whispered straight from the heart, came in and out of focus on his minds stage. New York was still a dream in the distance, but Blaine suspected he had been right all along; his soulmate would be there, in the city that never sleeps. He wondered what he would look like, what he would do for a living, how long in the future until they meet. No one inspired him at Beaumont; everything was driven by the concept of singularity and independence. To meet your soulmate at high school was like admitting that you needed someone to shape your future and Blaine knew that his parents wished more for him than that.

Just as whispered conversations were replayed, visions of Kurt came unbidden to his mind and he closed his eyes in pain. He tried to forget, always tried to forget that face and what had happened. Blaine felt like a different person now, though it was only two years ago. Nothing was as it used to be and so he could throw himself into his extra-curricular activities and almost imagine that he wasnt the same Blaine. He was changed, a perfect wax model perhaps of the real person and no one could see underneath. It was so long ago that Blaine realized he wouldnt know how to act if he was brought back to that time.

He always regretted not saying goodbye, felt a pang at knowing Kurt had been hurt, but he was led to believe it was for the best. His phone was taken away and they moved house immediately. He hadnt even healed properly before he was enrolled here at his new school in Connecticut. He boarded, lived away from home and rarely saw his parents and it was surprisingly easy to start again. He could be a new Blaine here, no one knew he had been bullied or beaten so badly. He was no longer defenseless and weak; he could take on anyone and prove that they were wrong. His father had deleted his Facebook once they moved, but after a while the feeling of wanting to rebel took over. He saw the sense in what his father did, he knew it came from a place of caring, but it was so wrong that he created a new Facebook account, calling himself Blaine Anders and telling friends at Beaumont. No one from his old life was added, but he could see their pictures and unprotected comments, including those that involved Kurt.

Kurt had moved on it seemed, in some sort of way. He had posted pictures and videos of performances with his glee club and although he looked a little sadder than Blaine remembered, he was at least in a place he belonged. Blaine had always known Kurt was destined to shine, so he was glad that people had started to see it too. If he noticed that Kurt was currently single, Blaine didnt acknowledge it.

He had toyed with the idea of contacting Kurt again, but whenever his finger hovered over the friend request icon, or to send a personal message, he quickly changed his mind. What could he say after two years? Sorry for leaving when it had been at his fathers insistence? Sorry he had been weak and pathetic and not tried hard enough to maintain contact? No, Blaine couldnt write that and so he was left feeling lonely and slightly bored with the way his life was bound to turn out.

He continued to stare at the ceiling as the realization hit him: he was lonely. He had friends, lots of friends actually in the many clubs he belonged to, but no one knew him, not really. They accepted him as gay and he had helped the school come to terms with homosexuality through being out and proud. He belonged to so many clubs that he seemed to fit in anywhere and with any clique. The sports players admired his skill on the lacrosse field, his glee club praised his singing ability and he was a natural leader. People noticed Blaine, but no one took the time to dig a little deeper and find out what he was all about.

The room got darker as he refused to close the curtains and the ceiling shadows changed as night drew closer. As the clock ticked over to midnight, he realized his hand was changing, his palm itchy. He sat up abruptly and turned on his bedside lamp. It had started.

It was strange to watch. His skin felt tight and started to tingle, but he was mesmerized as letters scratched on his palm, twirling patterns started to appear, etched painfully, causing Blaine to hiss in pain. There was a sting and a stretch and the capital letter H started to appear. Other letters scratched the skin faintly and eventually he could make out the whole name, though it got progressively darker as he watched.

Kurt Hummel

Blaine stopped breathing, just for a second. Kurt was his soulmate. All those conversations where they had tried to guess who might own their best friends heart and where they might meet, all those whispered conversations where secrets were revealed and promises made together of Broadway and New York. After all that time, that perfect childhood friendship and he had known his soulmate all along. They had met so young, not even Kurt with all his romantic notions would have guessed that they were soulmates. Blaine felt his eyes fill with tears and he shook his head at his daft behavior. He couldnt cry now. Instead he flopped down on his bed and resumed staring at the ceiling. He turned off the light and let the darkness take over.

Kurt was his soulmate.

If Blaine was honest with himself, as he now realized he should be in the darkness at least, he had known this all along. Their friendship had always been easy, a great to-ing and fro-ing between them where they would laugh and sing together, exchange secrets and hopes for the future. There was an inherit easiness about them. Blaine could always relax around Kurt and be himself. Without his best friend, Blaine slowly realized, he was lost and had been for two years.

Blaine knew Kurt was in Lima, thanks to his spying on Facebook, but what could he do? He couldnt walk into Kurts life now after all this time and apologize, though that was all he wanted to do. Kurt wasnt seventeen just yet; he wouldnt know they were soulmates. Blaine decided to wait.

Sebastian made his presence known in the new year. The Warblers had lost sectionals last year, but this new leader threatened to topple the hopes of New Directions. He wanted to be the best and would seek out the competition in order to intimidate and throw them off course. Kurt was schooling Rachel in the art of picking a perfect wedding dress at The Lima Bean when Sebastian approached.

He was perfectly attired in his Dalton blazer, his hair styled correctly and a take away coffee cup in his hand. He sat down without invitation and smiled sardonically.

"I know who you are, no reason to introduce yourself," he said simply and Kurts eyebrow rose.

"Please enlighten us then," he said, dripping with disdain. "We know you belong to the Dalton Academy Warblers."

"Good, my reputation precedes me then," he said, standing taller in his seat. "My name is Sebastian Smythe and I am the leader of the Warblers."

"What do you want?" Rachel said sharply, Jesses betrayal still in the forefront of her memory.

"Rachel, I brought an engagement gift." He handed her a brown envelope and Kurt was confused. How did this guy know her name, and that she was engaged?

"Ive done my research," Sebastian said as if hed read Kurts mind. Rachel opened the envelope and quickly hid the offending photo.

"Woah, woah, woah," she shouted, "that is photoshopped, his thing is not that small or brown." She pulled a face.

"And he could never fit into those pumps," Kurt said with utter derision. Sebastian smirked, slightly impressed.

"Just think, from now until eternity, every time someone googles Finn Hudson theyll be treated to that," he said pointing to the photo, "And dozens just like it. Thats the beauty of the internet, it stays with us forever."

"What do you want Sebastian?" Rachel asked, too disgusted to even look at him.

"I want a guaranteed regionals win, so I want you to drop out. McKinley gets home court advantage this year."

"But that is show choir terrorism," Rachel said, outraged.

"You have twenty-four hours to drop out Rachel, or I press the upload button," he said and lifted his coffee quickly in the air and was gone.

"We have to do research about this Sebastian," Kurt said quickly as soon as he was gone. "How come we didnt know about him from the blogs?"
"I knew we were competing against him, but not like this," Rachel said, already on her phone to scan the websites for Intel. Kurt did the same.

"Ooh, another show choir has been burnt at his hands," Kurt said, finding the information first. "They warn about Sebastian and his blackmailing ways. Nothing was ever proven so he got away with it, but they plan to continue to besmirch his so called reputation."

"Good, we cant let him win, he cant beat us."

"Exactly," Kurt said, suddenly feeling ten feet tall and then slouching. "But what do we tell Finn?"

"We tell him nothing," Rachel said after a while, the cogs in her mind working overtime as she scanned the rest of the blog. "We need to find some dirt on this Sebastian and I know exactly where we can find it." She showed Kurt the blog and he smiled knowingly.

"Fantastic!"

"Im not sure about this Rachel," Kurt said, getting out his fake ID. "Chas Donaldsworth? This doesnt even look like me."

"Itll be fine," Rachel said quickly, donning her black beret and sunglasses. "Mine says Im thirty-eight. Theyll work."

Kurt could feel the beat of the bass and hear the click of the pool table as they approached, but he felt strangely exhilarated at the thought of going in. He wasnt disguised, but Rachel would do all the hiding and photo snapping. Kurt was there merely to look pretty. The bouncer took one dubious look at their IDs and let them in.

"Enjoy. Its drag queen Wednesday," he said looking like he might want to end it all.

"How do we even know hell be here tonight?" Kurt whispered in Rachels ear.

"Shh, I have knowledge," she hissed. "Im going undercover; dont worry if you cant find me." And she scarpered off, leaving Kurt to admire the drag queens and trying to name them all before ending up at the bar.

"Just a diet coke," he said to the barman, who nodded. Kurt took a seat at a stool and surveyed his surroundings.

There were a few people on the dance floor, but most were playing or watching pool and darts. His heartbeat settled as he realized this wasnt the scandalous place he had imagined. It didnt live up to its name.

"Well, well, well," a familiar drawl came from behind him. "I wondered how long it would take for you to come here. You just screamed gay when I saw you at The Lima Bean."

"You give a bad name to the entire gay community," Kurt said, turning around sharply and giving Sebastian his best bitch stare.

Sebastian seemed to love the banter and took a seat.

"And you give the gay community cutting edge fashion thats usually only seen on Puerto Rican pride floats."

"Im sorry, I didnt hear you I was distracted by your giant horse teeth," Kurt returned and Sebastian laughed. He leant back slightly and nodded.

"Youre witty, but Im not backing down."

"Well see about that," Kurt said, sipping his drink and Sebastian eventually wandered off to see if he could catch someone on the dance floor.

Kurt started to suspect they wouldnt find any incriminating evidence here, Sebastian playing it safe and only dancing with a few regulars. Kurt ordered another drink and surveyed the room once more.

He was facing the dance floor, still seated at the bar, when Karofsky approached quietly, causing Kurt to jump when he saw him.

"What are you doing here?"

Karofsky looked taken aback and he tried to place a placating hand on Kurts arm, but Kurt pulled back suddenly.

"Hey, Im not going to harm you," Karofsky said, his face worried. "I promise."

Kurt looked him over. Karofsky was dressed all in denim, completely different from his jock attire, with a cap on his head and a beer in his hand. He looked relaxed and comfortable in his own skin.

"So hows life at your new school?" Kurt asked, trying to be polite though his heartbeat still raced.

"Fine," Karofsky said, nodding and then realizing Kurt expected more than that. "I just wanted to have a normal senior year, play football without my team mates hearing rumors about me."

"I would never have told anyone," Kurt said adamantly. "Its not who I am."

Karofsky smiled, grateful for that after all this time. He had spent the last few weeks of his junior year avoiding Kurt after the prom fiasco, determined to lay low. He was one of a crowd when others threw slushies or tossed Kurt in the dumpster, but he had stopped approaching him alone. Kurt had started to believe it was because Karofsky was under the impression he could catch the gay.

"I didnt think Id see you here, Karofsky." Kurt said, "You come here all the time?"

"People like me here, I feel accepted," he said smiling, "and you can call me Dave."

Kurt felt a blush on his cheeks. It didnt feel wise to start calling your tormentor by their first name.

"Im what they call a bear cub," Dave continued, but Kurt just looked confused.

"Because you look like Yogi?"

"I dont know," Dave laughed, "Because Im burly or something?" His face fell as he took in Kurts defensive pose.

"So this is the point where you judge me?" Kurt looked surprised.

"No, as long as youre not beating people up, Im all for being who you have to be, at your own speed."

"Right now Im just trying to get through high school." Dave looked thoughtful, twirling the beer bottle in his hand. After a while, the silence irked Kurt.

"Have you come out?"

Dave was surprised at the question, lost in his own thoughts.

"No, not really," he admitted. "I come here, but no one knows at school and I havent told my parents yet."

Kurt nodded. "But you have a mark?"

Dave instantly clenched his fist. "Yeah."

"Whats the name?"

Dave stared at Kurt for quite a while, deciding if he could trust him with this information, something he hadnt told anyone.

"Mark Foreman," he whispered, avoiding Kurts burning gaze and gripping his beer bottle.

Kurt nodded. He had been right.

"Why did you kiss me, Dave?" Kurt asked quietly, needing to know.

Dave looked up quickly and leant forward in his desperation to be understood, words already falling out of his mouth.

"I saw the mark, knew I was gay and you were so out and proud and just there. I knew you werent my soulmate, but I kept thinking about you, I saw your face everywhere. When you followed me into the locker room, you were in my face and your skin was so clear and smooth… I thought one little kiss wouldnt matter." He knew he had taken something very precious from Kurt and there were no words to give it back. His head lowered, he looked like he might start to cry.

"It gets lonely here doesnt it?" Kurt said after a while, his soft voice calming to Dave, who simply nodded. "Were just waiting for our soulmates, never knowing when they might appear. Its a lonely game."

Dave looked upon Kurt as if he was the wisest person he knew.

"You know your soulmate?" Dave asked.

Kurts expression froze and he considered telling Dave the truth. It might be nice for someone else to know, share his worries and be friends at least. But he shook his head.

"No, I have the name, but I dont know who it is," Kurt lied.

Dave nodded, accepting it with complete trust.

"I always wondered if it might have been that Blaine kid you were always hanging around with," Dave continued. His eyes roved around the bar, missing Kurts startled expression. No one had mentioned Blaine for so long. "Do you know what happened to him?"

"No, he vanished," Kurt admitted, "never keeping in touch. I have no idea where he is now."

Dave nodded, watching carefully as Kurts jaw tensed, but he said nothing about his suspicions.

"I guess if people are supposed to come back into your life theyll find a way," Dave said, smiling slightly as Kurt looked at him fully.

"Do you really think so?" Kurt asked hopefully.

"Thats the whole idea of soulmates right? If we dont have at least that simple hope what else is there to live for?"

Kurt nodded, letting his mind wander to hopes and dreams he hadnt let himself delve into for so long.

"Theres always hope."

Rachel texted him furiously after a while, to set up a meeting in the bathroom. She grabbed and pulled him into the nearest cubicle as soon as he entered.

"Rachel…"

"We have to speed up the process, hes not doing anything scandalous," she whispered near Kurts ear.

"What do you want me to do about it?" he asked, mild panic in his eyes.

"Seduce him," she said, beaming at her suggestion, her eyes twinkling. "Lead him on and leave him, kiss him and make him beg."

"Jeez Rachel…I dont know…"

"Kurt, you want to be out of here by curfew, right?" He nodded reluctantly. "Then this needs to happen." He accepted it mutely.

"Use the best talent you have at your disposal," she said, winking and as he went to leave, she patted him on the ass to prove a point, causing him to yelp. "Go get em tiger!"

Kurt grimaced, but something clicked as soon as he left the bathroom. If he was to get into NYADA later on in the year, he would have to show them his best performance—Time to act his ass off.

Sebastian was on the dance floor, edging closer to another guy who seemed to eagerly accept Sebastians advances, but as Kurt approached, Sebastian noticed. His eyes wandered, trailing Kurts body, making Kurt think he had quite a bit to drink already. A song finished and the beat morphed into Beyonces Drunk in Love. Sebastians eyes lit up as he recognized the beginning.

Kurt smiled slowly, taking in Sebastians more eager face as the song started.

Ive been drinking, Ive been drinking

I get filthy when that liquor get into me

Kurt rocked his hips, dancing with no one, but forgetting his self-conscious stilted moves in glee and deciding to be the gay bar superstar he had always wanted to be. He flung his arms a little higher and came closer to Sebastian, making sure he would have ample opportunity to take a look at his fatty. Sebastian was only human; he watched what he could. After a while, Sebastian could look for only so long without touching. A hand snuck around Kurts waist, winding over the fabric through his thumb and grazed the delicate skin just above his waistband. Kurt gasped.

"You sure know how to tease," Sebastian purred in his ear, making Kurt shiver at the close proximity to warm breath and lips. Kurt closed his eyes and sunk further back so he could feel Sebastians firm chest behind him.

"Wanna play?" Sebastian murmured and Kurt found himself nodding. "Good," Sebastian continued, "just some fun." He quickly nibbled Kurts ear lobe, teasingly, gently, giving Kurt the impression that he might have imagined the contact. Kurt felt his heart clench.

He let it all happen: the teasing, the touching and the tasting, but he wanted someone else. His body knew that this boy wasnt his soulmate; it couldnt be deceived. As his eyes remained closed, he let his mind wander and imagine it was Blaine behind him—firm and solid in his arms, teasing and taking. Kurt could feel what was missing. There was no feeling of comfort or security. His soul wouldnt find rest here.

Sebastian seemed to recognize the hesitation though he allowed the mutual appreciation of beauty to continue for a little while longer. His hand left Kurts waist and turned him around in his arms.

"You know your soulmate?" Sebastian looked genuinely kind then and that was what confused Kurt the most. He merely nodded. Sebastian smiled sadly.

"I dont know mine yet," he said. "I know what you were doing here…"

Sebastian left it unsaid and Kurt wasnt sure if he meant the plan with Rachel or the seeking for affection.

"Were all just looking, whether we know our soulmate or not. We all need love and while we wait, theres no point in being lonely." They remained on the dance floor, the movement hazy in their peripheral vision.

"Im always here for company."

And he walked away, leaving Kurt to wonder if he would ever feel that lonely.

There was a knock at the door, causing Blaine to jump slightly out of his post-homework haze. On his bed, staring at the ceiling, which had become a custom recently, Blaine had been dozing off. He started at the noise and sprung out of bed with newfound energy.

"Who is it?"

"Its me," Mark said through the door, "Let me in Blaine." He sounded irked and Blaine opened it quickly.

"What are you up to?" Mark asked, scanning the room to notice the opened study books and the messed bed.

"Closing my eyes, giving up on homework," Blaine said his body as he sank back on the mattress. He landed on his bed with the least amount of energy. Mark took the desk chair and twirled around in circles. Blaine was tired just looking at him.

"Dont you have homework?" Blaine asked, eager to be asleep.

Mark nodded. "Yes, but that can wait."

Blaine didnt ask the obvious question, it was clear Mark had come to say something, so he waited.

"So its a nice room you have here," Mark said. "I didnt get to come in when I walked you back after the movies."

"I dont sleep with someone on the first date," Blaine winked, causing Mark to laugh.

"Much to my disappointment." Mark laughed again and Blaine knew he wasnt too hurt by the rejection. "We could try it again? Date I mean."

"Why? Im not your soulmate," Blaine said.

"I know and Im guessing Im not yours?" Blaine looked at him in surprise. "I noticed youve been clutching your hand closer to your chest recently, hiding the mark. You know the guy?"

Blaine wondered how much to say. Hed known Mark for a while, a good friend in many ways, but completely on the surface. No one had ever gone that deep.

"I did," Blaine started, closing his eyes in pain as soon as the words left his mouth. "We got out of touch when I left Ohio."

"Two years ago?"

Blaine nodded. "Ive known him since I was five."

Mark breathed the word wow. "Where is he now?"

"Still in Lima, I saw his profile on Facebook."

"So you havent contacted him?"

"How can I?" Blaine flopped back dramatically on the bed. "I left without a word two years ago. How can I try to say sorry after all that time? How do I explain it to my parents? Urgh its such a mess…"

"Your parents?" Mark looked confused as the whole sorry story tumbled out of Blaines mouth: their childhood, coming out, Sadie Hawkins, and the aftermath. Mark shook his head sadly at the conclusion.

"Bloody hell," Mark muttered. "That is rough."

Blaine covered his face with his hands and groaned. Mark took pity.

"But hes your soulmate, which must mean youre his. When will he find out?"

"He knows," Blaine said sadly.

"Then you need to find him, explain. Try to build a relationship. If youre soulmates then youre meant to be; youll make it work."

Blaine looked like he seriously doubted that.

"Im serious, Blaine," he said. "You cant leave it to chance. You never know how long it might take for fate to bring you two together again."

Blaines eyes glazed over a little and Mark thought he might have lost him. Then Blaine smiled.

"I think I might know where I can find him," Blaine said. "Theres just one place we promised to meet again, hoping our soulmates would be there too."

Blaine smiled at his younger self, his idealistic conversations and his dreams.

"New York."