"Do you want to escape?"

The words seemed to hang like an invitation as Kurt nodded. Blaine made his excuses to the others but Kurt seemed able to relay the reason he was leaving early to Rachel through a single look. She understood immediately.

As they prepared to leave the bar, Blaine grabbed his hand with just a look back to check that Kurt was following and the quiet of the street outside and the glare from the street lights shook Kurt from his reverie, looking at Blaine's fingers linked with his own.

"Where are we going?"

"A surprise," Blaine said without turning back and Kurt skipped slightly to keep up and make sure he was level with Blaine and no longer trailing behind. Blaine paused to look at their hands and blushed slightly.

"Sorry I didn't mean to take you away like that," he said a little sheepish, "Did you want to leave? We can go back if you want to make a night of it with your friend or..."

"It's fine Blaine," Kurt interrupted, smiling kindly, "You asked if I wanted to escape and I did."

Blaine smiled – a warm genuine smile that Kurt decided suited him and was probably very rare. He was intrigued.

"So where are you taking me?" Kurt tried again.

"Nope, no can do," Blaine said laughing slightly. He took them both on the subway and they walked some more without Blaine relaying anymore information. Blaine seemed to take pleasure in the silence and Kurt didn't want to disturb it with idle chat so he waited. He had a while to observe and think about the different sides of Blaine he had met and seen over the last few weeks and he wondered whether he reflected so many different characters himself. His head started to hurt.

"What are you thinking about?" Blaine said laughing and Kurt's eyes rose to meet Blaine's that were watching with amusement, light and laughter in his eyes.

"You," Kurt said simply, "I don't understand you."

It seemed to wipe the smile off Blaine's face and bring him to reality with a bump. He paused then his lips twitched slightly.

"I guess I'm hoping that tonight might be different, that I can explain myself a little."

Kurt searched his face for any insincerity and found none. It was on the tip of his tongue to say a cutting remark only to save himself the embarrassment of being without words and unsure of himself. He found himself at a loss often with Blaine and felt a little disarmed. He decided he would see how the night played out.

They soon reached Blaine's chosen destination and Kurt looked up at the tall building, expecting the place to be locked to visitors, it was getting a little late.

"The Rockefeller Center?" Kurt asked as Blaine pressed a simple code by a side door and opened it, allowing Kurt to enter first.

"You have a personal code?" Kurt asked, visibly impressed.

"I know someone," Blaine said shrugging although Kurt could tell the cocky comment masked a very real sense of embarrassment.

They walked past security and indicated that they were going up the escalator.

"This is where you're taking me?" Kurt asked, unsure whether to be impressed that he could see the place at such a late hour, when all other patrons had gone home or to wonder what could be so special about a place he had visited loads of times before.

"Yes and no," Blaine said simply, indicating that they were going to the 70th floor, the very top. "You may have seen the observation deck before but this will be something very different."

He gave no more of an answer as the elevator continued its journey. Kurt could feel his stomach rise and sink with the elevator as they moved up and he tried to remember the last time he had been to the center, deciding it must have been years ago. He had never seen the observation deck and wondered about its view. It took a surprisingly long time to get right to the top but as the doors opened, Kurt tentatively left the cosy box as Blaine hung back, wanting Kurt to see first.

Kurt crept out as if it was a sheer drop rather than a circular protected view and he inched closer to the barriers as he saw New York go further and further outwards. It seemed to be endless – the little lights, the big buildings aglow and blinking at the top – despite the darkness there was a sea of lights and if you looked close enough some came on while others were flicked out. Kurt's breath hitched at the sight and Blaine smiled that he could show him something new and vast in the little world they occupied.

"Wow," Kurt breathed, "It really is big up here."

"Or down there," Blaine said chuckling.

"I don't want to think about that," Kurt said averting his eyes from the vastness below. "How can you be allowed up here so late?" Kurt turned slightly, taking his eyes from the view.

"My friend does security here and I've had parties up here before after hours so I know the code. Security is here all night and they recognise me." Blaine tried to sound nonchalant but Kurt was having none of it.

"Why do you want to gloss over what you can have here, your privileges?"

"Because I shouldn't really have it, it's all because of what I look like, all because of a brand and what I can bring to the place. Nothing more, nothing less." Blaine looked out at the view ahead, creeping forward to lean slightly on the railing. It would be impossible to do anything dangerous here so protected was their view but Kurt flinched slightly anyway and inadvertently came closer.

There was a comfortable silence as they watched the world. It looked like it was detached from everything else, the world ahead solid and straight, unfeeling and cold and it brought a kind of peace over the outdoor area where they stood. It seemed life went on regardless and not for the first time, it made Blaine realise how small and insignificant he really was in the grand scheme of things.

"Did you always want to be a model?" Blaine asked without looking at Kurt who stood solidly next to him, unmoving and continuing to search the world below.

"Not really, it just sort of happened." They continued to stare below, words travelling between them, nothing else.

"How?" Blaine asked.

"I was auditioning for NYADA as was my friend Rachel and although we both got accepted my headshots drew attention when I first came to New York and someone from my faculty recommended I send my pics to someone she knew. The rest is history."

"Did you have a chance? Did you consider saying no?"

Kurt thought for a moment, the question appearing very weighty. He had considered declining but he had felt foolish. It had been his dream to sing for so long and to finally see his way to achieving it was overwhelming but modelling had seemed such a big opportunity that he hadn't felt he could decline. Looking back he felt that it would help his career in the long run but as time wore on he realised his dream of singing had faded and a bigger picture had engulfed it. His smaller dream seemed trivial and immature in comparison.

"I did consider saying no but I guess I felt ungrateful and that I should take opportunities when I can. I thought the rest could wait, that I had my whole life ahead of me to catch up. Now it just seems so very far away."

"So you don't like the job?" Blaine asked carefully.

"No it's not that," Kurt said, looking up at Blaine for the first time since creeping closer to the view. "I do like what I do and the things I get to experience but I guess I needed to feel that little bit more attractive and special and I never really considered that that comes at a price."

"What price?" Blaine whispered as if he already knew.

"I don't know really," he said feeling a little lost, "I guess it doesn't really matter what you seek and how you find your self-worth. It's all surface, no feeling and it's not really what I value and feel is important. I want to be more than the perception."

"What do you want to be?"

"Loved," Kurt said instantly, "For my flaws and imperfections, for my hatred and anger, for my passion and energy." He looked at Blaine's honey coloured eyes, could almost see something swirl and water there and he whispered in the air between them.

"I want to be fully known and understood, not for my beauty but for everything else in between."

"I think beneath your beautiful is worth searching for," Blaine said, his eyes pools of honey as he searched Kurt's face.

"But that's not what the world values," Kurt whispered as if he thought that Blaine was mad.

"I know," Blaine said smiling kindly, "It can be our little secret."