Chapter 21

Burt is woken from his dozy stupor after dinner one evening, shortly after Kurt returns to New York, to a frantic knocking on the door. He opens the door quickly to find Blaine, his eyes red, his breathing erratic.

"God kid, what's wrong?" he said, waking up quickly and ushering him inside.

It takes Blaine a while to respond, his breathing still deep as he sits on the sofa. Carole makes tea in the open plan kitchen, knowing when to leave them alone but glad she can hear what is going on. Blaine looks ashen white in the harsh glare of the lights in the living room but Burt waits patiently.

"I just needed to get out of my house," Blaine says, avoiding Burt's worried expression, "Can I ring Kurt?" He finally looks at Burt, desperate and pleading, suddenly very glad that they don't have to rely on letter writing for all their modes of communication.

"Of course," Burt said, "But only when you explain to me what's happened."

xXx

"Dad!" Kurt exclaimed into the phone as soon as his home number came up on his phone, "I've tried ringing Blaine for our planned skype date but he's not answering."

"It's me Kurt," Blaine whispers into the phone, almost on the verge of tears at the worry in Kurt's voice.

"Blaine!" he said, checking his phone screen to check where the call was coming from. "Why are you at my dad's? What's happened?"

Blaine couldn't talk for the sob that threatened to come out but he furiously swallowed.

"I had to go Kurt," he said, swallowing again, "I found out what my dad's been hiding this week and I knew I couldn't stay on my own there."

"Blaine, you're driving me crazy here!" Kurt practically shouted, "What is it? What's happened?"

Blaine swallowed. "My dad started locking my mum's bedroom door a couple of days ago, saying she was still ill and that she didn't want any visitors until she was better. I knocked on her door yesterday to no avail and I started to get worried. My dad left to get some groceries today which was suspicious on its own – my mum always does the shopping – and I took the key to her bedroom, seeing where he had hidden it yesterday. I don't know what I assumed was going on but I knew it wasn't right and when I unlocked the door there was just darkness and her figure in the bed. I called to her with no answer so kept going until I was at her bedside. I shook her shoulder gently to find it wasn't a shoulder. It was a just a big pillow Kurt." Kurt gasped then felt a little silly.

"But where is she?"

"My dad found me in her room when he returned and I confronted him. He looked so pathetic Kurt. He said she's left a few days ago and he hadn't wanted to tell me or even admit it to himself so he'd pretended she was ill. I mean how long did he think that could go on for? How stupid does he think I am?"

"Where's she gone?"

"I don't know," Blaine said, sudden realisation hitting him that his mum had left without him, that she didn't care what happened to him.

"Can you contact her any other way?"

"No," Blaine said after he realised Kurt couldn't see him shake his head. "I need to ring Cooper and tell him I think. I mean he'll be home for thanksgiving and maybe he can help find mum."

"Yeah, that's a good idea. Are you going to stay at my dad's tonight?"

"Yeah I hope so, I'll have to ask but I don't want to go back there. Your dad knows."

"Good, can you pass him on to me before you hang up?"

Blaine did so and Burt occasionally looked at Blaine while Kurt spoke to him and he smiled. Blaine couldn't hear what was being said but he knew that Kurt was asking him to look after Blaine and it felt good to be cared for even if Kurt was miles away.

Blaine and Kurt said their goodbyes after Blaine assured him he would ring him tomorrow. Carole offered dinner to Blaine who declined but accepted a soda as they all settled in front of the television. There was a comfortable silence as they watched some kind of game show and Carole eventually said she was going to bed, leaving Blaine and Burt to watch in comfortable silence. After a while, the television still on, Burt started talking, although he avoided Blaine's gaze.

"I need to tell Kurt something important but I don't know how he'll take it. He's been through a lot that kid." Blaine looked at Burt in curiosity but didn't say anything, only allowing him to continue at his own speed. "I have prostate cancer," he said simply and Blaine felt the air come out of his lungs again. "They've caught it early," Burt continued, sitting upright and trying to assure Blaine that he was ok, his eyes wide. "Local stage, surgery should fix it but I know Kurt worries about my health as it is and I didn't know how to tell him. I guess I'll tell him when he returns at thanksgiving."

Blaine didn't know what to say. Burt had quickly become like a dad to Blaine over the last few months, a better father in many ways than his own and he knew how much Kurt loved him. The thought of Kurt worrying, not knowing about this, made a nervous lump settle in Blaine's stomach. It made his worries about his mum pale in comparison.

"I think it would be best to tell him to his face but I know it will crush him."

"He'll need you there definitely," Burt said nodding, "Are you coming to thanksgiving dinner?"

"I think my dad will need me there this year, especially as Cooper is coming to visit too but I'd love to come for the rest of the holiday."

Burt smiled. "That'll be good kid, we'd love to have you here."

xXx

Richard avoided talking to Blaine much more than usual and they rarely found themselves in the house at the same time. Richard decided suddenly to complete much more work at the office so to avoid spending hours at home moping or worrying, Blaine decided to go out for coffee most evenings with Sebastian or Ellie. Sebastian was more than happy to be there for Blaine and was regaling Blaine with tales of when he lived in Europe. Blaine looked incredulous.

"What?" Sebastian asked, noticing his change in expression.

"You're just a little out there," Blaine said, smiling, "I can't believe you've done all these things and been to all these places."

"And your whole bashful school boy thing? Super hot?"

"Look Sebastian," Blaine said slowly in case he wasn't understood. "I have a boyfriend."

"Doesn't bother me, if it doesn't bother you," he said smirking.

"No, I mean I really care about him," Blaine said, his face softening at the thought of seeing him again in a few days.

"He doesn't need to know," Sebastian continued.

"I just never want to mess my thing with him in any way. He's really great."

Sebastian looked at Blaine carefully and nodded. He would have to try other means he realised, so he gave up temporarily as he listened to Blaine explain the wonders of one Kurt Hummel.

xXx

Blaine deliberately limited phone conversation with Kurt in the ten days before thanksgiving, hoping that Kurt wouldn't notice. He knew he would find it difficult to speak to Kurt, to answer questions about Burt when he knew the truth but Kurt was hurt nonetheless at Blaine's withdrawal. Blaine and Burt were there at the airport to pick him, Blaine already planning to spend most of the holiday with Kurt in Lima. He would return home for dinner the following day but he was just looking forward to finally seeing Kurt, he didn't care about the cost of travel. As soon as Kurt landed and started walking through the airport to meet them, Blaine ran to him and wrapped his arms around him.

"Wow," Kurt said as he parted from Blaine's tight embrace, "I wasn't expecting that sort of reaction." He smiled and Blaine's cheeks tinged pink.

After Kurt spent the journey back telling them both tales of New York and NYADA, Blaine went upstairs as soon as they got home, deliberately giving Kurt and Burt time to speak to each other properly. He was reading a book he had brought when Kurt opened the door, swiftly leaning his back on the wood when it closed and looking at Blaine. It was obvious from his red rimmed eyes that Kurt had been crying and Blaine got up, attempting to come closer until Kurt spoke.

"You knew?" Kurt whispered accusatory.

"Yes, when I stayed before but Burt wanted to tell you himself, it wasn't my place."

"Is that why you've been cold on the phone?"

"I didn't mean to Kurt, I just knew I couldn't tell you everything. I thought you'd understand."

"I do," he said as he sat on his own bed, looking defeated and so low.

"Come here," Blaine said soothingly, leading him to the bed so Kurt could rest his head in the nook between Blaine's neck and shoulders. He stroked his hair and lower back until Kurt practically mewled. He had missed this contact; missed Blaine's touch so much. Letters were beautiful, conversations on skype or over the phone were amazing but nothing beat being held like this. Kurt couldn't help but let out a low groan and Blaine smiled that his fingers could still do that to him.

"God I missed you," Blaine murmured in his ear as he lowered Kurt beneath him, slowly removing his shirt to reveal the gorgeous skin beneath.

"You're so beautiful Kurt," he whispered as he kissed the soft skin of his neck, causing Kurt to moan in pleasure and close his eyes. It had been so long since he had touched Kurt, his fingers itched near the waistband of Kurt's jeans and Kurt nodded his permission, too far gone already to speak. Blaine removed Kurt's trousers, snuck his hand beneath his boxers to touch and stroke his hardness and Kurt bit his lip to remain a little quiet for his dad downstairs. Blaine stroked slowly, gently until Kurt started writhing in pleasure and grabbed his arm to encourage him to go quicker, so desperate for release as Blaine started to rub against his thigh. Kurt soon came with a shout and he pounced on Blaine, stripping him of his pants, licking his way down his chest and sucking gently on Blaine's exposed hipbone.

"This is going to be embarrassingly quick," Blaine said, almost huffing out his breath in response to Kurt's gentle licking. Kurt laughed. He sucked him gently, licking the head causing Blaine to buck his hips in desperation. Taking him wholly into his mouth, Kurt soon brought Blaine to his climax and he lay plonked by his side, feeling satisfied. There were just some things that you couldn't do via letter.

xXx

The dinner the following day was awkward for Blaine. Cooper had come home the previous day and had attempted to cook with little help from Richard which resulted in an undercooked turkey but plenty of roast potatoes and vegetables. Luckily the desserts had been shop bought so the three men found themselves eating their fill of other food.

Conversation was limited and Cooper seemed to suddenly have enough. He snapped as dinner was finally finished, plates cleaned as quickly as possible, his father about to retreat to his office.

"Dad aren't you going to talk about the huge elephant in the room?" Cooper said exasperated.

He was on the stairs as Cooper had called him and he turned reluctantly, clearly hoping that he could avoid this conversation.

"There's nothing to discuss, your mother has decided she would rather not see us, what else can I do?"

"Try to win her back!" Cooper shouted, "Do something, don't just give up!"

"No I refuse to beg, she can come back when she wants to but I'm not begging." He retreated upstairs and Cooper was left with Blaine to find some way of getting in touch with his mum.

Dear Kurt,

This weekend was amazing but I find myself just living for these times together now and I get a bit sad when I realise I've got a whole month until I see you again for Christmas.

I think my dad doesn't want to see me at Christmas which is why he was so quick to say I could visit you, with his money and apparent blessing. Cooper will be busy with his new film role, though he hasn't given me the details, which makes me think it's not fully paid for. I think it might be one of those jobs that you get paid for after the film has made loads of money and the production company obviously preys on actors like Cooper, so desperate for notoriety and fame. I would never tell him that though.

He must have enough saved for this private detective that he's hired to find my mum. It all seems so pointless really and I've tried telling him that but he won't listen. I think he wants answers at all costs and I know something must have happened between my parents. I didn't think my mum would ever leave despite how unhappy she was. I guess I'm more disappointed that she didn't let me know, offer to take me with her but maybe she just wanted to escape and I would remind her of my dad.

I have sectionals soon and Sebastian has been driving me a little insane with all his rehearsals. He is determined to win, even talking about sabotaging the other teams somehow with blackmail. I think sometimes he thinks he's in a dodgy movie but I just humour him.

How's Adam's Apples going? Do they compete like high school show choirs? Adam's version of 'Baby Got Back' sounds funny!

I miss you but looking forward to our skype date tonight,

Love you most, love you only,

Love Blaine xx

Dear Blaine,

Thanks for your video of sectionals. Sebastian was much better than I remembered, though you of course were the best! Your solo was breathtaking Blaine, I always love you singing new wave 80s classics like 'Everyone Wants to Rule the World'. I'm glad you won.

Don't say that about yourself Blaine – if your dad doesn't want to spend Christmas with you it probably because you remind him of what he's missing. Please don't let him get you down. I hate the thought of you sad at home without me to hug you close. If you ever need anything and it's not enough over the phone, please see my dad. I know he'd love to see you more often.

Adam's Apples are still going strong though we decided not to compete so we could concentrate on our studies. We perform regularly to college students though and generally don't take ourselves too seriously. We try to perform classic songs in different ways, a challenge to push ourselves and become more versatile artists. Adam has been helping me to sound more 'pop-like' but I don't think I'll ever have a voice like yours that appeals to the masses, mine's more unique.

Adam will be staying in New York for Christmas as he can't afford the plane home to England, so you'll meet him then. He's been a really good friend and I think you'll really like him. He does great impressions of the characters in Downton Abbey!

I can't wait to see you over Christmas, not long now, counting down the days.

Never forget,

Love Kurt xx

Blaine was reading the letter as he got coffee a few days later and Sebastian suddenly appeared behind him, reading over his shoulder as he waited in line.

"Ooh who's Adam?" Sebastian said smirking as he stood next to Blaine in the line, ignoring the bitch glare from the people behind him.

"Just one of Kurt's friends in New York, I'm meeting him over Christmas actually," Blaine said, determined not to let Sebastian bother him.

"Oh it's like that is it?" Sebastian laughed and winked, causing Blaine to groan in annoyance.

"You turn everything into an innuendo," Blaine said.

"Hey," Sebastian said holding his hands up in surrender, "If he wants to play while he's away who's to stop him."

"He's not 'playing away'," Blaine said, using his fingers to indicate the quotation marks, "I trust Kurt, I know he would never do anything like that."

"I'm just saying, if he's playing away, maybe you should do the same. Have you ever had the 'we're exclusive' chat? I mean you're young, you don't have to settle down just yet."

"We've always been exclusive. Most people aren't like you Sebastian. I love Kurt and that means something."

"Maybe it does to you but does it mean the same to Kurt?"

Blaine shook his head at Sebastian's idiocy but secretly started to wonder how close Adam and Kurt actually were. He couldn't wait until Christmas, suspicions and worries would just disappear as soon as he could hold Kurt again, he just knew it.