It seemed to take an age for Kurt to arrive at Blaine's place and he cleaned and prepared the spare room as well as he could. He checked to see he had enough food in the apartment, he prepared a calming playlist on his iPod for when Kurt arrived and started the coffee machine and watched the machine prepare itself as he waited. He was constantly on edge and in a bid to calm his twitching fingers he played on his piano when a timid knock was suddenly heard at the door.

As he opened it, Kurt was leaning on his upright suitcase like he could barely support his own weight and had given up. He looked apprehensive, like he wasn't entirely sure he had made the right decision but Blaine took all his bags and led him inside. Blaine was still not convinced that Kurt wasn't hurt but Kurt smiled sadly to reassure him as he stood in the living room, Blaine walking to the kitchen to start the coffee machine again. Once it started whirring he stood near the doorway, not sure if Kurt wanted him nearby and not wanting to scare or upset him.

"Kurt?"

Kurt turned to face Blaine at the sound of his voice, not daring to speak, not daring to move and Blaine decided to make coffee, to give him some space. As he returned with two steaming cups of coffee, Kurt took one tentatively from his place on the sofa and the feel of the steam rising hit his face and made him sigh. Blaine sat apart from Kurt, his face a picture of anxiety and worry as Kurt looked at him again.

As soon as it had been decided with Adam, Kurt knew that here with Blaine was the only place he could go, this man was the only one who would be truly there for him and he smiled, causing Blaine to look surprised at the sudden change of mood. Kurt felt safe already.

"I've never seen your new place before," Kurt said, his eyes scanning the room in awe, "It's nice."

"Kurt, what's happened?" Blaine said, not wanting the pleasant chit-chat to continue until he knew. "Have you been hurt? Where's Adam?"

"He's at home," Kurt said, his face dropping at the tone of Blaine's voice, the need to discuss what had happened. "I'm not hurt."

"What happened?"

"We're getting a divorce," Kurt said simply. Blaine's heart seemed to stop and he sat back in his chair to wait for an explanation. He had wanted this for so long it felt quite alien to Blaine to have his wish granted. The look of utter sadness across Kurt's face was enough to make Blaine realise that this was not a happy decision and the timing in Blaine's life could not have been worse.

"We've been going downhill for ages, ever since that argument I spoke to you about. Gosh that was two years ago now, wasn't it?" Kurt looks in the distance as if he could see the trailing departure of time itself. Kurt seemed to realise the awkward position he's put Blaine in and he apologises.

"I'm sorry Blaine, I haven't been a good friend to you, haven't been around and now here I am on your doorstep and you don't know what's been going on. I just expected you to help me, god I'm such a bitch." He stands in annoyance and goes towards the window, looking out at the darkness of the streets below.

"Its fine Kurt, I'm always here for you, you know that. I made that promise all those years ago and I intend to keep it." Kurt turned to face Blaine slowly, fresh tears in his eyes, and Blaine instantly reached out to him, touched his arm gently in apology.

"Kurt, I didn't mean to make you cry..."

"No," Kurt says shaking his head and looking at the hand on his arm, "I just can't believe you remember those words after all these years, I don't deserve a friend like you." A single tear trickles down his face as he blinks and Blaine knows he doesn't have the right, but he wipes it away with his finger and Kurt leans into the touch. A little shocked at his own actions, Kurt takes a step back and finds his seat on the sofa, Blaine now sitting near him on the other side.

"What happened?" Blaine said, starting the conversation again in order for the awkward moment to pass and Kurt seems to reach a decision, his hands squeezed together on his lap, he starts the story.

"As I said we've been struggling for years. I think the last time I saw you, one of Rachel's dinners, Adam wasn't there?" Kurt checked with Blaine and he nodded. "Well we'd had a huge row that afternoon and Adam, instead of apologising, refused to go out for dinner and I had to make an excuse for him."

"Yeah you said he was ill," Blaine said, and Kurt looked ashamed at the lie.

"Yeah, I couldn't admit it. I guess everyone thought we were so in love and happy I didn't want to disappoint anyone. Part of me wanted to pretend everything was all right, so I could carry on. Work was gruelling and when Adam eventually found work, it was always temporary and not a lot of money. I know he finds it tough, I really do know but he always picked arguments about it. I think he thought that I rubbed it in his face and made him feel guilty but the truth is I always felt like I was treading on egg shells around him, never sure what would make him angry or upset."

"Was he violent?" Blaine said suddenly, worried that Kurt had suffered this all on his own.

"No," Kurt said adamantly shaking his head, "Never, he was just moody with me or would stay silent for days at a time. By the time I knew we had problems we were so far from talking that nothing could be done about any of it. I tried, I suggested counselling a few months ago but he didn't want to admit we had any issues. The outside perception of our relationship was really important to him and no one knew about any problems. I suppose that's why I'm here, I know that I haven't been around much but everyone else would be so surprised I know I couldn't handle it. Even my dad doesn't know and thinks we're madly in love still. I know that's why I haven't seen you as much, I could never lie to you and I know you would see right through me."

Blaine didn't know whether to take this as a compliment or not. Knowing that his deep knowledge of Kurt and his facial features and body language had kept him from his best friend for months had him realising how much he had missed him.

"We've been living separate lives for three months now," Kurt continued, "I mean really detached: separate beds, never talking unless to exchange information about grocery shopping or bills. We seemed to reach a way of living like that, like that was what our whole life together would be like until we die. I couldn't bear it." Kurt looked down, already so sad that he had failed and feeling so defeated.

"What made you decide to separate tonight though?" Blaine said, realising there must have been something to make him decide to leave.

"He forgot our anniversary," Kurt whispered, "And I know it seems silly to fixate on that after all the lack of communication, but it meant more to me. I think I realised as I gave him his gift and he looked at me with alarm, knowing he hadn't even thought of it, I couldn't go on pretending that it was all ok. We discussed what we wanted and he acknowledged that he didn't want to work at it, felt the damage was all too much. I think that hurt the most – knowing that he didn't even want to try, that he didn't seem bothered. He hadn't remembered our anniversary, it wasn't important and he just wanted to live his life. It didn't matter if I was living with him, he barely noticed my presence."

Kurt looked diminished sitting there on the sofa, reduced to what Adam led him to believe he was. Blaine wanted to reach out to him, comfort him but he knew it would be dangerous. Blaine hadn't seen Kurt on his own for years, always with a crowd or with Adam and he had started to move on. He would always have a special place in his heart for Kurt, would always remember their time together fondly but he had known since he ended the blog that constantly thinking about what he missed and what he could have had would lead to his demise. He knew he had needed to concentrate on other things that made him happy, his singing, his friends and living in New York. He was living his dream and in many ways he had moved on. But looking at Kurt now, sad and dejected, he knew he could so easily be dragged back in and he had to guard his heart.

He made Kurt's bed up and went to his own bedroom to change into his pyjamas after checking Kurt didn't need anything else. Blaine finished brushing his teeth and lay in bed with the lamp still on, knowing he wouldn't be able to sleep. Seeing Kurt again after all these months, knowing his marriage had been a lie, left Blaine torn between wanting to comfort Kurt and wanting to protect himself and run. He had thought of Kurt only in the fleeting moments, when he heard one of their songs or thought he could smell his cologne but those times had lessened, so determined not to concentrate on those images and memories for too long. Blaine had been proud of himself, deciding to live his life without regret and not linger on those fleeting memories and yearnings. Seeing Kurt tonight he knew was dangerous and he could feel himself edging closer to him as he sat on the sofa, itching to hug him, bring him closer. He had forgotten how his blue eyes could swirl with colour, always reflecting his emotion. He had forgotten how fiercely protective he felt around him and how vulnerable but caring Kurt could be. As Kurt had left and said goodnight, closing the door to the spare bedroom behind him, Blaine had gulped at the sight of his ass in those sinfully tight red pants and realised he was done for. How could the man still have this hold over him after all these years? Blaine wondered if he would even remember his touch or how his lips felt against his own but as he lay in bed, he started to imagine what it would be like now, after all the change and heartache. Had Kurt morphed into something unrealistic and worthy only of dreams?

As Blaine turned onto his side and turned off the lamp, determined to get at least a few hours sleep that night, he heard a timid knock at the door and he sat up, saying Kurt could enter.

"Blaine, I can't sleep, I wondered if you had to be up early tomorrow? I thought we could watch a movie or something? Tell me if I'm overstepping," he said in a rush, "But I guess I could use the company if you were up anyway?" As Blaine's room was so dark Kurt was surrounded by light from the hallway, causing him to appear to loom over him from the doorway and Blaine gulped.

"Yeah sure," Blaine said, getting up from the bed and switching on the light. The illusion disappearing. He wandered to the living room and flipped through his DVDs. "What do you fancy?"

"Nothing too soppy," Kurt said grimacing, "Maybe a musical or a fantasy?"

Blaine's eyes alighted on the perfect choice. "Harry Potter?" he asked, his eyes twinkling.

"Really?" Kurt said, mocking him just like he used to when they were younger. "I thought you'd got over that obsession."

"It was never an obsession, I just showed the right amount of love and adoration that a great series of books deserves," Blaine said laughing. He had repeated this argument so many times and he had always won, Kurt secretly liking the films but never telling Blaine. He decided on 'Harry Potter and the Prisoner of Azkaban' and they got under the blanket Blaine had draped over their legs and settled to watch the movie.

"So what's been happening in your life Blaine?" Kurt asked, the squishy bus journey happening to Harry as he spoke.

"Well that's a massive question, its ages since I've seen you," Blaine laughed.

"Well just summarise," Kurt said laughing, waving his hand nonchalantly, "Tell me the best bits."

"Well I've been seeing this guy Elliot for a few months now," Blaine said it so nonchalantly that Kurt was determined not to blanch at the news of a boyfriend and he didn't comment, knowing that it could wait. Blaine was always so reticent about mentioning dates and that was never part of their conversation. The knowledge that Blaine was seeing someone caused an uneasy feeling in his stomach that he had never felt before and he searched his memory but he couldn't remember Blaine having a boyfriend, just dates and always temporary relationships. "I've still got my piano bar gigs," Blaine continued, as if he had said nothing at all and not noticing Kurt's struggle. "I still play wherever and whenever I can. Someone heard me a few weeks ago at a bar across town and he was interested in listening to my EP and producing a new one. I've written a few more songs recently so he said I should send him a demo."

"That's fantastic Blaine," Kurt said excitedly, "I can't believe you didn't tell me this sooner."

"Well I didn't want to text you if you were busy. Are you still on stage? I haven't seen you in a while."

"I have a few weeks off before I start rehearsals for an off-Broadway production. It's a new musical actually and they're hoping to take it to Broadway eventually so if it goes well..."

"I love that you have always been able to do what you dreamed Kurt," Blaine said sincerely, his eyes twinkling with pride. "You've worked so hard and you really deserve it all, I'm glad I can see you succeed where you wanted to."

It had been so long since someone had praised him for his career, really genuinely acknowledging his hard work and talent, that Kurt felt tears start in his eyes and blinked them away. He had never been so emotional in front of Blaine before but all the pent up feelings seemed to want to leak through his eyes at the kind gestures of the man snuggling next to him. Adam, lately resenting his success, had only praised him in the early days of their relationship, when he had work himself. It had become a bone of contention for so long that Kurt had rarely spoken about his own work. He had always loved that Blaine loved music just as much as he did, that he dreamed just as big and the idea that both of them got to do what they were passionate about, was amazing to Kurt.

"Thanks Blaine," Kurt said smiling, so grateful that he had him as a friend and as they continued to watch the film, Kurt slipped his hand inside Blaine's, warm and content under the blanket.