Upon waking, the first thing Kurt notices is that there’s much more space for him to stretch out. The second is that the sheets are kind of cool. Both points can only mean that Blaine is up and hasn’t been here next to him for at least a few long minutes.

Kurt stretches, cringing at the way his muscles ache and relaxes back into bed.

“I’ll tell him you want to see him when he gets up.”

“I just need to-”

“He wasn’t exactly happy with you last night, Brandon. He’ll come talk to you when he wants to.”

The door slams and Kurt opens his bleary eyes to see Blaine lock the door and turn around, two bottles of orange juice in hand. He pauses when he sees that Kurt’s awake.

“Um…he wanted to talk to you but I didn’t think he should come in here and see you in my bed. I hope it’s okay that I said-”

“It’s okay,” Kurt assures him, sitting up to wipe the sleep out of his eyes.

The events of last night come rushing back into his mind full force, all at once, and something warm bubbles up inside his chest when Blaine sits down next to him and hands him a bottle of orange juice.

“We missed breakfast,” Blaine explains. “But we still have the fruit and stuff from last night in the fridge.”

“This is fine,” Kurt says with a smile, taking a drink.

Silence reigns for a long while and Blaine lifts a timid hand, as if unsure, and threads his fingers into Kurt’s messy hair.

“Last night…” Blaine begins but he stops and bites his lips together.

“Last night was wonderful,” Kurt admits, sliding an arm around Blaine’s waist. “Thank you. For everything.”

“When we said – when we said forever-”

“I wasn’t lying,” Kurt says immediately. “I want you.”

Blaine nods, looking deep in thought.

At that moment, Kurt’s afraid he only just imagined Blaine’s words last night. I want it, too. I want forever with you. Or maybe Blaine had only said those things because Kurt had said it during sex and he felt like he had to respond no matter what he really felt. Or maybe he was just being nice because it was Kurt’s birthday.

“Oh god,” Kurt breathes out loud. “You don’t-”

“No!” Blaine says immediately, keeping firm hold of Kurt’s arm around his waist because Kurt was about to slide it away. “No, Kurt. I want you, too. I do. I’m just trying to think of what the hell we’re going to do now.”

Kurt sighs in relief, body visibly relaxing. But Blaine’s right. What exactly are they supposed to do now that they’ve realized they don’t want to be with their respective boyfriends any longer?

“They’re going to hate us,” Kurt states.

“Well obviously when we break up with them, we’re not going to tell them we’re breaking up with them so that we can be together.”

“Right,” Kurt shakes his head, to rid himself of such confusion, as if for some reason he hadn’t thought about that. “People break up all the time.”

“Exactly. We just say that, you know, we’re not interested anymore.”

“That’s kind of harsh.”

“Well not in so many words,” Blaine remedies. “We just say something like, you know, the feelings aren’t there anymore. Or we could even own up to admitting that we might have feelings for someone else and we don’t want to go on leading them on when we’re unsure.”

“Even though we’ve been seeing each other behind their backs for months.”

“…Yeah.”

“I don’t think Brandon’s going to believe I’m telling the truth if I just say that the feelings aren’t there anymore. I’m pretty sure that something like that is a longer process and there are signs when people stop caring about each other in a relationship.”

“Well I…that’s what I’m going to tell Thomas. I don’t know what you want to do with Brandon, but that’s my way out.”

“You don’t think he’ll think you’re lying?”

“No,” Blaine says. “Because things have – things have been a bit strained, I think. We’ve been fighting a lot lately.”

“About what? When? I never see you guys fighting.”

“Because we don’t do it around other people,” Blaine says with a pointed look. “I just…I don’t know. Maybe I’m just easily annoyed with him lately or it’s because I’ve been thinking about you so much that I snap whenever he tries to get close. We haven’t even had sex in two weeks. Not since you and I had that…er…fight.”

At that, Kurt feels kind of guilty because that’s when Kurt accused him of choosing Thomas over him and fucking him when he couldn’t be with Kurt and just, ugh. Bad memories.

“I’m sorry,” Kurt says softly.

“Don’t be,” Blaine says, kissing Kurt’s temple. “It was honestly an eye opener for me. I get…I get the feeling that you’ve always been really uneasy about the whole affair, like maybe you were constantly thinking about who you had to choose. I wasn’t. I was content with playing both sides and having my cake and eating it too. I wanted you both. I didn’t want to have to choose.”

“And now?” Kurt wonders, even though he’s ninety nine percent sure he knows the answer.

“Now I only want you.”

Kurt nods his understanding, internally grateful that Blaine’s answer had been what he predicted.

“Well I’ve been trying my best to make sure Brandon doesn’t know about anything. I’ve been actively trying to be nice and sweet and cuddly and – and I just don’t think saying ‘the feelings aren’t there anymore’ is going to be a believable reason for ending it,” Kurt explains.

“What about summer?” Blaine asks randomly.

“…What about it?”

“Brandon’s from Illinois. He goes back there over the summer, doesn’t he? To be with his family at home?”

“Yeah, but-”

“But we’ll be here. In Ohio. I live like, not even two hours from Lima.”

Kurt purses his lips, brain riddles with questions.

“What?” he asks finally, frustrated that he can’t figure out Blaine’s point.

“We only have one week left of school and it’s final exams week. And then he goes back to Illinois where you two won’t have to spend time with each other. So you don’t break up with him until a few weeks into summer, maybe even a month, whatever. But by that time, you can say that distance is taking its toll, it’s too hard, etcetera. He’s a senior this year anyway and he’s going off to college so he can’t say ‘just a few more months and I’ll be back’. Unless…he failed on purpose like he hinted at on your date that one time.”

“No, no he’s graduating,” Kurt says distractedly, deep in thought.

“So then it works out just fine. We just keep the secret a little while longer and then after a few weeks, you have a plausible reason for ending it with him.”

“But you’re still going to break up with Thomas?”

“Yes.”

“That just – just doesn’t seem fair. You break up with him and you’re free to be with me, but you’ve still got to deal with watching me act like I still want Brandon. It’s not fair to you.”

“Kurt,” Blaine says softly. “This whole thing has been unfair. To everyone involved. We should have broken up with them in the first place. It’s a small sacrifice to wait a few more weeks to be with you openly.”

“…Are you sure?”

“I’m positive,” Blaine says. “A few weeks is tiny in comparison to forever.”

Kurt sighs and scoots over, allowing Blaine to sit fully on the bed and wrap Kurt in his arms. So, summer. He waits until summer. Kurt hates the fact that he has to lie a little bit longer, but maybe in the long run it will work, like Blaine said.

“Do you think we can?” Kurt asks quietly from within the safety and security of Blaine’s arms. “Last forever, I mean. We’re only sixteen.”

“Seventeen,” Blaine corrects with a smile into Kurt’s hair, reminding him of his birthday. “And I think that…if we care enough about each other and we’re willing to work hard enough, we can make it through anything.”

“I guess…we’re allowed to be young and stupid. Like you said before.”

“I don’t think we’re stupid,” Blaine negates. “I think we’re really hopeful. We may be young but…I know that you’ve made me happier than anyone ever has.”

“If it hadn’t been for me, do you think you’d still be with Thomas?” Kurt asks because he feels like he needs to know the answer.

Blaine remains quiet in thought, sighing into Kurt’s hair before he answers. “Truthfully? I think I would have been complacent with Thomas. I think he would have been enough for me, at least while I was at school. But I also think that I’d be secretly wishing for more.”

“I just hope I haven’t ruined something that could have been a good thing for you.”

“Thomas was a good thing, I think. But you’re an amazing thing.”

Finals week totally sucks, Kurt sighs to himself later in the day. He’s been in the library for hours with Blaine, cramming for all of his tests this upcoming week. Currently, he’s in between a long set of shelves looking for a specific book that might help him understand something in his AP Physics class.

“Can we talk?”

Kurt, startled, whips around so quickly that he almost drops the book in his hand.

“Don’t do that,” Kurt hisses to Brandon in a hushed voice. “You scared the shit out of me.”

“Sorry,” Brandon says, looking sheepish with his hands in his pockets. “I just wanted to talk to you. About last night.”

“Do we have to do this here?” Kurt whispers.

“Well I tried to come to your room earlier but Blaine wouldn’t let me in.”

“Because I wasn’t in the mood to see you,” Kurt says, as though it should be obvious.

“Are you really that mad about what happened?”

Kurt sighs and sets the book back on the shelf. “I’m not so much mad as I am…disappointed.”

“Usually someone isn’t disappointed when their boyfriend handcuffs himself to the bed,” Brandon notes.

“To be honest, I was expecting something a little more romantic,” Kurt admits, his mind drifting back to the picnic Blaine had prepared for him for his birthday. “Sex is great and all, but we have sex all the time. I just wanted something, you know, different.”

Brandon begins to look really sad, as if he’s suddenly disappointed in himself for not thinking romantically enough. Kurt’s torn between sighing in annoyance and wanting to soothe away the worry lines that have appeared on Brandon’s forehead.

“It really isn’t that big of a deal,” Kurt says.

“It seems like it is,” Brandon says quietly. “I’m really sorry, Kurt. I’ve just – I’ve never been that great at gift giving in the first place. So by the end of the week, when you still couldn’t tell me what you wanted, I sort of panicked and resorted to what I knew best. And that’s sex.”

Kurt despises the look of utter sorrow on Brandon’s face and he’s thankful he won’t have to see it when he breaks up with him over the summer. However, for now he still has to play the part of dutiful, doting boyfriend so he steps forward and takes hold of Brandon’s hand.

“It’s okay. It’s in the past.”

And it is, isn’t it? Everything’s in the past now and this is all a lie because Kurt doesn’t even want to be here.

Brandon smiles tiredly and leans over to kiss Kurt gently on the lips.

“I’ll make it up to you somehow,” Brandon whispers. “I promise.”

Kurt nods, forcing a smile as best he can. “Until then, I have to get back to studying.”

“I’ll see you later?”

“Um, maybe,” Kurt says slowly, trying to make up an excuse for avoiding him. “Depends on how much studying I get done before dinner.”

“Just text me if you wanna hang out.”

“Will do,” Kurt replies. He’s far too eager for the conversation to be over.

Brandon squeezes Kurt’s hand once more before leaving Kurt alone in the aisle again. One more week, Kurt thinks. Just one more week and he doesn’t have to do this to Brandon’s face anymore. Wow, okay so that’s a terrible thought.

But it’s the truth.

Slipping a hand in his pocket, Kurt toys with the pocket watch Blaine had given him for his birthday. The trinket is smooth in his hand and it reminds him of Blaine’s smile and the promise of forever. Heartened, he picks up his book and heads back toward the table, but stops short when he sees Thomas sitting in his seat. Kurt backs up and peers just around the corner, hoping he can’t be seen.

He is able to hear their conversation, though.

“…need to talk to you. In private,” Blaine is saying.

“Why can’t you just tell me here?” Thomas asks.

“Because it isn’t – it isn’t something we should talk about in public like this.”

“Is it about sex? Or some kind of gossip?”

“No,” Blaine says immediately. “Nothing like that.”

“Then just talk to me.”

“Thomas, I don’t want-”

“Just say it, Blaine,” Thomas says, though Kurt can barely hear him because his voice turns so quiet and he looks like he’s about to hear about someone dying.

Blaine takes a deep breath. Kurt keeps a tight hold on the pocket watch.

“I think…we should – should break up,” Blaine says slowly, eyes focused on the tabletop.

“…Why?”

Biting his lip, Blaine picks at the edge of the table and steels himself for the conversation.

“I just think that my – that my feelings for you have changed. They’re not the same and I don’t think I want to be with you when I’m not sure I care for you the way I did before.”

“Blaine,” Thomas says softly, reaching over to cover Blaine’s hand with his own. “Why do you look so sad about this?”

“Because I don’t want to hurt you,” Blaine says brokenly. “You don’t deserve it. But I can’t – can’t stay when I don’t feel that way for you anymore.”

“It’s okay,” Thomas says with a cheerless smile. “It’s okay. Don’t beat yourself up over this.”

Blaine slides his hand out from under Thomas’ to wipe at the tears that have appeared on his cheeks. “How can you be so calm about this?”

“Honestly? I…kind of expected it after the past couple of weeks. We’ve been fighting for no reason, we don’t even hold hands anymore. I’m sorry that it has to end. But, I mean, we had a good run, didn’t we?”

“Yeah,” Blaine says softly. “We did.”

Thomas nods, leans in, and whispers something to Blaine that Kurt can’t hear. Kurt slips the pocket watch out of his pocket and holds it tightly to his chest, praying Thomas doesn’t say something to Blaine that will make him stay at the last minute. As bad as he feels about continuing this lie with Brandon while Blaine breaks up with Thomas, Kurt is still scared that there’s a chance he won’t be able to have all of Blaine’s heart if Blaine feels guilty enough to remain in a relationship.

He watches as Thomas stands, kisses the top of Blaine’s head, and begins walking towards Kurt. Panicking, he turns to look as if he’s perusing the bookshelf rather than eavesdropping, toying with the pocket watch in his hand. Thomas approaches, heading for the door.

“Hey, Kurt,” Thomas says in passing with a wan smile.

“Hey,” Kurt replies, attempting to feign distraction.

For some reason, Thomas pauses in his trek toward the library door and turns back to face Kurt. He stares, glances down at Kurt’s hand holding the pocket watch, and looks back up to his face. His expression is unreadable, so Kurt simply lifts an eyebrow in response. After a few seconds, Thomas turns and leaves.

Kurt briefly wonders about Thomas’ actions, but ultimately decides to brush it off and return to his table with Blaine.

“You okay?” Kurt asks gently as he sits back down.

“Yeah,” Blaine nods, wiping away the last few tears on his face. “You heard everything?”

“Yeah. Except the last bit when he leaned in. It was actually a pretty short conversation.”

“He just said he’ll always be here for me if I need a friend. And that he hopes I find someone who makes me happier than he could.”

Jesus, Kurt thinks. Thomas really is just a good guy. Brandon’s a good guy too, he remembers. And they’re both been wronged for months now.

How did they ever get into this mess?

“I’m sorry,” Kurt says, voice barely audible. “For causing all this.”

“Don’t you dare,” Blaine says immediately. “We both did this. We both – it was a mutual choice. We have to deal with the consequences.”

“He meant a lot to you, though.”

“You mean more,” Blaine whispers.

Oh thank god. Finals are over, summer is here, and Kurt thinks he will never put off so much studying again ever, never, ever. His dad should be here soon to help him pack, he’ll leave for Lima tomorrow, and a few days after that, he and Blaine are going to see a movie together.

If only he had foreseen what was to come.

“Kurt! Kurt, wait!”

Someone is shouting his name through the crowded hallway full of boys yelling and bustling out of their last classes of the year. He sees the top of Brandon’s head as his boyfriend winds through dozens of bodies. Brandon rushes up to him and he’s got this glowing smile plastered on his face like he found out he just passed every single test ever and it makes Kurt kind of uneasy.

“What’s going on?” Kurt wonders amidst the large group of boys and teachers in the corridor.

“I’m going to college,” Brandon says, almost out of breath. “I know you know that. We know I won’t be back next year and I’m going back to Illinois over the summer and I’m going back east to college. I know we’ll talk on the phone and we’ll text and we’ll skype but I don’t – I don’t know when I’ll see you again.”

“But why-”

“I love you, Kurt,” Brandon says as though his heart is bursting with emotion. “I love you. I love you and I had to tell you before I left. I know it’s sudden, but I just…I love you!”

Kurt remains frozen. People mill about all around him and his ears begin to ring from all the sound, all the talking, the laughing. Brandon loves him. And Kurt wants to vomit. He can’t say it back. He just – he can’t. His mouth, his lips, his tongue won’t form around the words. He’s opening and closing his jaw, trying to find something appropriate to say in return, anything at all. He panics, throat closing up and pulse racing.

When his vocal cords eventually regain their ability to function, what slips out of his mouth is not at all what he had intended to say.

“I’m cheating on you.”