Kurt sat upright. He threw his duvet off of him and moved to stand beside the bed, panicking. Blaine was still screaming, thrashing around on the mattress.

“No, no, no, no! Leave me alone! I’m sorry! Please, just leave me alone!”

“Blaine, wake up! You’re safe!”

“Don’t hurt me! Get away, I’m sorry. I’ll change, I promise!”

“Blaine!” Kurt’s voice had risen to a shout now, but Blaine was too deeply asleep.

“No, no! Mamma, come back to me! Please don’t leave me mamma, I can’t deal with this on my own. I love you, please mamma!”

He gave him a shake. Blaine woke up and, on instinct, jumped away from Kurt’s arms, tears streaming down his face. Kurt let out a sigh and wrapped his arms around the other boy.

“I… I’m sorry,” Blaine mumbled, allowing himself to relax into the embrace. “They’ve never been that bad before.”

“It’s okay Blaine. I promise you. I’m here. Do you want to talk about it?”

Blaine was silent, but then gave a shaky nod. “It seemed so real. It was a memory, from last month.” Kurt remained quiet, knowing not to interrupt. “My dad caught me shopping with Jeff. He knows that Jeff is gay and assumed we were together. He threw me into our basement, took his belt off and… he beat the shit out of me. Then he locked me in there for the night. It… it was so cold Kurt. I thought I was going to die.”

“It’s okay,” Kurt said again. “You never have to see him again. You’re not going to die; you’re here, in my bedroom, safe.”

“Then the d-dream changed. I was still in the b-basement, but I was surrounded by blood. Then, oh Kurt, it was horrible... I looked around and I saw my mamma lying there, just like we found her. Kurt, I loved her. I still do. And she’s gone. I know she was suffering b-b-but I need her.”

“Blaine, calm down. I know how you feel, okay? She’s in a better place now, I promise you. The pain is never going to go away. I know me saying this won’t make you feel better, but I’ll never lie to you. It does get easier though. You learn to remember the good things about the person you lost. Your mamma loved you, Blaine. She loved you a lot – she wouldn’t have stayed for so long if she didn’t. But she couldn’t talk to anyone like you can, so she did what she thought was best. Blaine, listen to me!” He said, because Blaine had let out a howl. “She’s in a better place. She’s up there with my mother, and they’re looking at us. They’re telling us how silly we are because we still get upset. They’re laughing with each other, cooking, doing things they love to do. They’re together, and they’re keeping watch over us okay? Your mamma would be proud because you’re such a brave person.”

Blaine could only nod. He knew Kurt had lost his mother, but that had been an accident. Blaine’s mother had ended her own life – she’d abandoned him, when he needed her.

Kurt curled into the bed with Blaine, his arms wrapping around him protectively. It was only when he heard him snoring softly, that Blaine got out of bed, being careful not to disturb Kurt. A glance at the clock told him it was four in the morning. There was no point in going back to sleep, and at any rate, he wasn’t sure he’d be able to.

Blaine pulled on a jumper, shivering lightly. He looked around, wondering how the hell to get out of Kurt’s bedroom. His heart stopped – this was a basement bedroom. His hands clenched into fists. He opened the door silently, and sprinted up the stairs, a sigh of relief escaping his lips when he reached the landing. He saw his duffle bags at the foot of the stairs that led to the upper landing and smiled. He opened several of them before finding the one he wanted. Within a few minutes, he had the small, square razor in his hands. His legs seemed to move of their own accord, trying to find a bathroom. He was thankful there was one just off to the side of the living room – the last thing he wanted to do was search upstairs for one. He locked the door behind him and took a deep breath. He looked in the mirror over the sink and pulled a disgusted face. The bruise from the day before was bad, but there were new ones on his cheeks and across his neck. He didn’t even want to look at his torso, knowing he’d be revolted.

Blaine took another deep breath, looking down at the blade in his hands. It had been a long time since he’d even thought about doing this. Before he could change his mind, Blaine rolled the sleeves of his jumper up. He took the razor and cut into his wrist, breathing out a small sigh. The blood dripped into the sink silently. Relief swept through him. It felt good, being able to control something in his life. Blaine dragged the blade across his wrist several more times, cutting deeper with each one. He sank to the floor, his back against the door.

Blaine wasn’t sure how long he sat there, but eventually he heard footsteps coming down the stairs. He stood up and washed the blood from the sink quickly. He pulled the sleeves of his jumper down and hid the razor blade in his hand, unlocking the door. He came face to face with Carole. She gave a small squeak of surprise, but flashed a warm smile.

“I didn’t expect you to be up Blaine,” she said, stepping to the side so he could pass.

“I had a nightmare,” he said quietly. “But I’m okay now.”

“Good, good. Burt told me to tell you that you and Kurt are staying home from school today. Go back to bed,” she said kindly. “You look exhausted.”

Blaine nodded and went back down the stairs to the basement. His stomach clenched, but he knew he’d have to put up with it. He couldn’t tell them that he was afraid of a basement.

“Where did you go?” Kurt asked when he walked in. He was sitting up in bed, looking worried.

“I… I needed to go toilet.”

“Blaine, I have an en-suite. Why did you go upstairs?”

He sighed. “Fine, I needed to get out of the basement. It reminded me of my nightmare so I just stretched my legs. I didn’t go anywhere except the bathroom upstairs though, I promise.”

Kurt rolled his eyes and opened his arms wide, inviting him in. Blaine did so without a second thought – Kurt’s arms were his comfort.

“Um… the woman your dad’s dating… I don’t remember her name, told me that we aren’t going school today.”

“She’s called Carole,” Kurt said quietly, leaning back on the bed, relaxed. “And I know. Dad told me last night… or rather this morning. Come on Blaine, go back to sleep.”

Blaine shook his head. “I… I don’t want to. I’m scared to.”

Kurt sighed, but understood. “Okay. So it’s…” he looked at the clock beside them, “half six in the morning. What do you want to do?”

Blaine was silent. He knew what he’d like to do, but… He glanced up at Kurt, who was watching him curiously. Then, before he could talk himself out of it, he kissed him. He could tell Kurt was surprised, but he responded. Their lips moved perfectly together. Kurt’s lips were soft and warm, his grip on Blaine’s body strong. Eventually, they pulled away. Kurt raised an eyebrow at Blaine.

“Well Mr Anderson that was certainly a nice thing to wake up to.”

Blaine smiled. “I’ll agree with you on that,” he whispered before moving to kiss him again. The kiss was more passionate this time – Kurt moved his lips from Blaine’s, dragging them slowly along his jaw.

“Kurt,” he moaned quietly. Kurt gave a wicked grin and moved his lips to Blaine’s neck.

Blaine could feel heat washing over him. Damn Kurt Hummel and his mesmerizing lips.

“Do you want to take your jumper off?” Kurt asked him in a whisper. “You’re burning up here.” He was about to agree but remembered his arms, his stomach tying itself in a knot. He sat up quickly, causing Kurt to topple to the side. “B-Blaine?”

Blaine just shook his head. He took a few deep breaths in a bid to calm himself. “I’m sorry… I just panicked. I’ve never kissed anyone before… and you’re just so…”

“It’s okay,” Kurt said, taking Blaine’s hands. “Did I make you uncomfortable?”

Blaine shook his head and Kurt looked relieved. They began kissing once again and, somehow, Kurt ended up lying on Blaine. He shifted, and the majority of his weight was thrown onto Blaine’s arms. He let out a gasp and flinched at the burn it caused. Kurt frowned. Blaine squirmed, trying to get him off, but Kurt pinned him down.

“I’ll give you one chance to tell me what you’re hiding.”

“It’s nothing Kurt, honestly…”

“Blaine!”

“Kurt, just leave it!”

Kurt was surprised that Blaine was shouting. He bit his lip, his voice turning soft.

“Please Blaine… You know I’ll find out anyway.”

Blaine let out a sob. “I’m sorry Kurt, I can’t. You’ll be so angry. Please, don’t.”

Kurt sighed and grabbed Blaine’s arm, pulling the sleeve of the jumper up carefully. He let out a horrified gasp and jumped off the bed.

“Blaine, what the fuck were you thinking?!”

“I’m sorry! I… I’ve only done it once before, but… before I met you, I thought about doing it again. My mamma would manage to talk me out of it… But now she’s gone and I just needed the release. I’m so sorry Kurt!”

“Blaine… Please, promise me you won’t ever do it again?” Blaine was silent. “For fuck sake Blaine, promise me! I can’t deal with you hurting yourself.”

“Okay,” he said in a quiet voice. “I’ll try Kurt… But losing my mamma… It’s hard.”

“I know it is. And I’m going to help you, I promise. Where is it?”

“Where’s what?”

“Blaine Anderson, don’t you dare play dumb with me. Give me whatever you used to do… this.”

With a sigh, he took the blade from his pocket and gave it to Kurt, who put it on the bedside table.

“Don’t you ever do it again, you hear me?” He nodded. “I know it’ll be hard honey, but I’m going to be with you every step of the way.” Blaine couldn’t help but smile at the endearment. Kurt noticed this and gave him a gentle kiss. “Go back to sleep. I’m going to have a shower, and then bring some food down for when you wake up.”

Blaine nodded again and settled back under the covers. Kurt kissed his forehead and stood up. Blaine was asleep in seconds. With one last glance at him, he picked up the razor blade and threw it in the bin. Then he went into his bathroom, stripped and hopped into the shower. The flow of hot water gave him the opportunity to let his guard down, the chance to think. He hadn’t even known Blaine for a week, and he was head over heels for him. He knew it was bad… but Blaine had kissed him. Did that mean there was something there? He sighed. Kurt didn’t date. He didn’t let himself get close to anyone, in case they were taken from him, like his mother had been. He was too afraid.

After about half an hour, he shut the water off and got out, wrapping a towel around his waist. When he re-entered the bedroom, he smiled at Blaine, who was snoring gently. He rummaged in his wardrobe and picked out some clothes – there was no point in ‘dressing up’ so he put on a pair of sweatpants and a hooded sweatshirt. When he got upstairs, he saw a note from his dad, telling him that Finn was still going school and to help himself to food. He sighed and set about making breakfast for him and Blaine.

Blaine tried to look around, but it was dark. He couldn’t see any further than a few inches in front of his nose and even then, that was a struggle. He squinted, but it didn’t make a difference. He shivered – the cold was pressing on him from all directions. Where the hell was he?

Suddenly, the room was filled with light. Blaine was temporarily blinded. He blinked a few times, waiting for his eyes to adjust. There were heavy footsteps, and he was hauled to his feet roughly.

“Come on faggot; look at what I’ve got for you!”

He shuddered at his father’s voice and tried, in vain, to escape his grasp. It did nothing but earn him a brutal punch. Blaine walked for what seemed like forever. He didn’t recognise where he was, and there weren’t any windows. For all he knew, he could be miles and miles underground.

His father suddenly stopped walking and pointed to a space in front of them. When Blaine didn’t move, he gave him a hard shove. He stumbled forwards and let out a horrified scream. Lying in front of him, covered in blood, were two bodies. One was his mamma, her wrists slashed open. Beside her, the one that he couldn’t seem to tear his eyes from, was a boy. Blaine guessed that he had been beautiful while he was alive. He still was in death. His hair was a light brown and his eyes, staring blankly to the heavens, were a shocking shade of blue. He dropped to his knees in front of the boy, unable to stop his tears. Why did he care so much? His mamma was lying dead behind him, yet he was drawn to this stranger.

Then it hit him. It wasn’t a stranger.

Kurt.

“No!” He screamed, his hands flying to Kurt’s face, caressing it tenderly. “No, Kurt! Baby, wake up!”

“Blaine!”

“No, Kurt! No, please no.”

“Blaine, baby you’re okay! Just wake up!”

“No, he can’t be dead. Kurt, please wake up. Please, I can’t do this without you. Please, please, please, wake up!”

“For fuck sake Blaine, wake up! I’m here, I’m right here.”

Blaine’s eyes flew open. He felt arms around him and screamed, lashing out. Whoever it was flew off him. He heard the tiny gasp of pain and remembered where he was.

“Kurt!” He said, sitting up. “Shit, I’m sorry.”

Kurt just shook his head, holding his bleeding nose. He grabbed a tissue from the box on the table and held it up to his nose to stop the blood flow.

“I’m fine Blaine. Jesus fucking Christ, you can throw a punch. You should start boxing.” When Blaine still looked horrified, he rolled his eyes. “Forget it Blaine, it’s just a bit of blood.”

He bit his lip and took a moment to take in the scene. Kurt was shirtless… something that he found distracting. He blinked and looked around the room, trying to avoid staring at his muscles. Kurt caught on, despite Blaine’s efforts.

“Oh shit, sorry. I’ll put my jumper back on.” He reached on the floor and pulled a sweat-top over his head, still managing to use a hand to stop the blood coming from his nose. “There, all done. I got really hot when making the pancakes so I took it off.”

“It’s… It’s fine.”

“Are you okay Blaine? You… you had another nightmare. Do you want to talk about it?”

Blaine shook his head, but he still ended up telling Kurt what he’d seen. Kurt sighed and moved to put his arms around him, then stopped.

“I’ll only hug you if you promise not to punch me again,” he said, grinning. “It hurt like a bitch.” Blaine blushed and moved into Kurt’s open arms, relaxing. “I’ve got something to tell you.” He said after a while.

“What? You aren’t going to tell me you’re pregnant, are you?”

Kurt rolled his eyes. “Nice to see you still have that smart mouth, Anderson.” He said, laughing. “No, Finn rang me. The New Directions want to come round after school.”

“Oh.”

“Yeah… he text my dad, and he said it was fine. He even said everyone can sleep around tonight.” Blaine frowned and Kurt read his mind. “Yes, everyone – my room’s definitely big enough. But they all seem to like you, and they want to help you… it’s your choice though, I can still tell Finn the answer’s no.”

Blaine nodded. “Can I ask you a favour though?”

He smirked. “It depends. I’m not letting you be the godfather to my baby, not when you’ve insulted it.”

Blaine smiled back, biting his lip. “Actually, I was going to ask if the Warblers can come round too… Not to sleep, obviously but… I don’t know. I need them right now.”

“Of course they can Blaine, they’re your friends. I don’t mind them sleeping either – they were all really, really nice at the hospital. My dad won’t mind – he’s working all day tomorrow and Carole will love an excuse to cook.”

“Thank you,” Blaine whispered. Then, he frowned, remembering something. “Kurt, you never told me your dad was dating Finn’s mother.”

He shrugged. “I didn’t realise they were so serious… Blaine, can I ask you something?” Blaine nodded. “What would you say we are?”

His heart skipped a beat. “We’re… we’re whatever you want us to be… I remember someone saying you don’t date…”

“I don’t. I have this, er… fear… of getting close to people, because I’m terrified they’ll be taken away… But you’re different. I can’t help it.”

“I never thought I’d see the day…”

“What?” Kurt asked, frowning.

“Kurt Hummel, actually admitting he’s terrified of something.” Kurt attacked him with his pillow. “Okay, ow, I’m sorry!”

“Good! You know I can kick your ass… Now Blaine, answer my question? Do you… do you want to be my boyfriend?”

“Yes,” Blaine said without hesitation. He surprised himself, as well as Kurt. Well, he was definitely gay then. Kurt grinned and brought his lips down to meet Blaine’s gently.

After a while, Blaine dragged himself out of bed. He looked at the clock, slightly surprised to see it was well past noon.

“Where are you going?” Kurt whined.

“For a shower, I want to be clean for tonight.”

“Good point, you are stinking Blaine.”

This time, it was Blaine who attacked Kurt with a pillow. Kurt laughed and gave him a light shove towards the bathroom.

“Oh god, the smell – I can’t take it!” He exclaimed dramatically.

“And you said I was the dork Kurt.”

“Blaine Anderson, you’re the fucking dorkiest dork going. Me? I’m a badass. Oh, you’re dating a badboy!”

Blaine smiled to himself. “Yes, I am.”