Pain: that was all Blaine could feel. It was like fire, except it was… more. Every breath he took and every beat of his heart caused fresh ripples of agony to tear through his body. He opened his eyes, but had no idea where he was. It was dark and damp; he could see his breath come up in a mist in front of his mouth. He stood up slowly and carefully. His teeth were biting down on his lip hard in an attempt to stop himself from crying out in pain. He was silent for a few minutes. Then he heard a high-pitched whining. The sound made his heart stop. Why did the noise sound so familiar to him?

"H-Hello?" Blaine said his voice hoarse and raspy. He stumbled forwards, blinking in the darkness. After a few seconds, he hit something solid and fell, sprawling out over the cold, hard floor. Blaine swore and turned himself slowly. His hands reached out cautiously, feeling what he had fallen over. A gasp escaped his lips. It was solid and… alive! He took a closer look and his jaw dropped.

"Kurt!" He cried. "Oh my god – what's happened?"

Kurt gave another whine and shifted. That's when Blaine saw the gashes on his face, chest and arms. He was surrounded by blood.

"Kurt, baby, what happened to you?"

A glint of metal caught his eye and he saw the knife in Kurt's hand. It took a few seconds for it to sink in – he did it himself. Kurt had done this to himself.

Blaine woke with a start. It took his eyes a while to adjust – it was dark outside. He must have been asleep for hours – it had been light when he'd been put to bed… when Kurt had carried him up the stairs. Kurt. He turned over carefully, relieved when he saw him sound asleep. Blaine's heart was beating frantically and he was sweating. Very carefully, he got out of bed. He needed to walk, needed to calm down. But more than anything, he knew what he needed to do. He slipped out of the room and down the stairs, into Kurt's bathroom. He was on his knees and reaching for every razor blade he'd hidden. For some reason, there weren't many there. He sighed then picked up the ones he had and threw them in a bin. Blaine got back onto his knees, reaching around the back of the sink and inside the bath panels. He knew they were there somewhere.

"Looking for these?"

He turned to see Burt stood in the doorway, a small bag of razors in his hands. He didn't look angry, just… disappointed. Blaine stood up slowly.

"It's n-not what you think Mr Hummel," he said quietly.

"Blaine, you can't keep doing this."

"Please, please listen to me," he said, "You have to let me explain."

"Okay, okay," Burt said, raising his hands in surrender. "Come upstairs. I'll make a pot of tea or something and we'll ignore the fact it's three in the morning."

Blaine nodded and followed him up the stairs. Ten minutes later found him and Burt sitting opposite each other at the dining table, both holding steaming mugs of tea in their hands.

"What were you doing Blaine?" Burt asked eventually.

"I… I had a nightmare. It terrified me."

"Do you mind me asking what the nightmare was about?"

Blaine shook his head. "Of course not sir, but I don't really understand it myself." Burt nodded at him and he continued. "I was just… there… in pain. I don't know what was happening. It was hard to see. After a while I started walking, but I fell over something. When I looked it was Kurt. He was just lying there. Then I saw the slashes on his face and on his wrists, and the blood all around him. I thought he'd been attacked… you know, like before." Burt's face darkened and Blaine bit his lip. "But, then I saw the knife in his hands and I realised he'd hurt himself. Then… then I woke up."

"And you decided to… repeat what you did earlier?"

He shook his head. "No sir. When I saw Kurt like that it… it really hurt me. I was so scared he was dead, even though it was just a dream. I've realised that I'm hurting him. I don't remember much of earlier, but I remember how scared Kurt sounded. I hate myself for doing that to him. So I was going to throw them all away."

Blaine was crying now. Burt reached over and patted his hand gently. For once, Blaine didn't flinch at the contact.

"Listen to me kiddo," Burt said. "We don't blame you. I won't lie to you, what you've done has seriously hurt my boy – it's hurt all of us, but it's hurt him a lot more… more than he's letting on."

"I'm so sorry Mr Hummel-"

"Blaine for the last time, will you pleasecall me Burt. Look, you've hurt Kurt. You need to realise why though."

"I don't understand what you mean."

"He loves you. When Kurt falls for someone, he reallyfalls for them. I've never seen him so happy. You need to understand that he loves you. Okay kiddo?"

Blaine just nodded, biting his lip so he didn't let out a sob. "Thank you, sir… Burt."

He smiled and glanced at the younger boy's arms. "Does it hurt?" Blaine nodded. "Come on, I'll change your bandages. I'm not as good as Carole, but I know how to do it."

Again, he nodded. Blaine watched as Burt stood, picked up the first aid box and changed the bandages on his wrists. They both flinched at the wounds, but said nothing of it.

"Can I ask you a question?" Blaine said once he'd finished. Burt nodded. "What were you doing with those razors… and why are you awake so early?"

Burt gave a soft laugh, draining the rest of his tea from his mug. "I had a nightmare too. I've seen and heard a lot of crap today, stuff that I'll never forget in my life; Kurt's face when he told me everything, how broken he was, and seeing you on the floor. We… we thought you were dead, Blaine."

"I'm so sorry, Mr Hummel."

"Stop apologising kiddo, we're going to help you. I got up and went to the bathroom. Then I thought about watching TV for a bit, but thought I should go and get all the things that you could use to hurt yourself and throw them away. So I did. I was literally about to throw them into the bin when I heard someone coming down the stairs. I thought it was Carole, because she has work early, but then whoever it was went down to the basement. So I knew it was you."

"I'm-"

"Don't say you're sorry," Burt interrupted, smiling slightly. "Like I said, we're going to help you."

"Are you going to send me to a therapist?"

He hesitated. "I think so… Kurt can't do this alone. But I think we're going to send you both to someone, if that's what you want. He seems to think it'll be good if you go together. Of course, if you want to go alone that's fine. It's entirely up to you kiddo."

Blaine just nodded. They were silent for a few more seconds, before Burt suggested they go back to bed. They climbed the stairs in silence, neither one feeling the need to talk.

"Mr Hummel?" Blaine said when they reached Blaine's bedroom door. "Thank you."

"Blaine, you're never going to have to thank me. I promise."

He nodded, said goodnight and slipped back into the bedroom. He couldn't help but hope that Kurt was asleep. He wasn't.

"Where the hell did you go?"

"Shit," Blaine whispered, starting as he spoke. "I'm sorry, did I wake you?"

"Answer the god damn question Blaine."

"I had a nightmare so I went downstairs."

"Are you being serious?" He snapped. "Dammit Blaine, after what happened earlier, you've… show me your wrists."

"Kurt, you don't understand-"

"Blaine, show me the fucking damage."

He rolled his eyes. Blaine moved and sat beside him on the bed, holding out his arms. Kurt frowned, taking his arms and turning them over gently.

"You have fresh bandaging…" He whispered, more to himself that anything. "You didn't do anything?" Blaine shook his head. "Then… I don't understand. Why did you go downstairs?"

"I had a nightmare. You'd hurt yourself… all your face and arms were cut, and there was a knife in your hands. I woke up and… I remembered how scared you sounded earlier, when you thought I was dead. The pain in your voice broke my heart; I never want to hear anything like that ever again. So, I went down to throw out all of the razors."

"Oh Blaine," Kurt said, his voice soft. He pulled Blaine into a tight embrace. "I'm so proud of you."

"Your dad beat me to it. He thought I was going to hurt myself, so we sat and drank tea for a while. We just… talked."

"You got my dad to drink tea?" Kurt repeated, raising an eyebrow. "Holy shit, he never drinks that stuff. I normally have to make him, because it's better for his heart but…"

"It was his idea… But I decided something Kurt. I want to go to therapy… with you."

"You do?" Kurt said, stunned. When Blaine nodded, he let out a sigh. "Are you sure you want me there as well?"

"Yes… You're the person I trust most Kurt. I'll need you there; you calm me down so easily. I… I know I'll have a complete breakdown when I talk about this, especially to someone I don't know. I know you won't want me there if you decide to talk to someone about what's happened to you, but I need you there with me."

"I'll be there. But I'm going to need you as well. Screw being the person I trust most, you're the only person I trust. I'll be with you every step of the way honey, okay? I promise you."

Blaine nodded and allowed Kurt to hold him in his arms, humming softly. Eventually, they fell into a deep, dreamless sleep.

The loud, unwelcome sound of "It's My Life" blared from Kurt's phone. He cursed silently and reached out, answering it. He didn't even need to look to know who it was.

"What do you want Finn?" He snapped.

"Dude, we did it! We won!"

"You… won?" He repeated, bewildered. Then it sank in. "Oh! You got through to Nationals?"

"No man," He shouted over the noise behind him. "We got through to Nationals. They're in New York… Kurt, we're going to New York!"

"Oh my god," he whispered, no longer feeling sleepy. He made sure to stay quiet as to not wake Blaine. "We're going to New York! What time is it anyway? Where are you?"

"It's four thirty. I'm on my way home man, everyone's here. I mean everyone – even the Warblers are here. They were awesome, and they aren't sore losers or anything! They want to see you both – Puck told them what happened yesterday."

"I'm going to kill Noah Puckerman," Kurt hissed, rolling his eyes. "Why can't he keep his damn mouth shut?"

"You know that isn't fair – Puck loves you both, he's worried. Anyway, we're just down the road. See you in a few!"

The line went dead and Kurt sighed. He knew that he had to get up. It was half past four – he'd slept for most of the day! He knew they were all going to be loud and irritating. Not that he could blame them, but Blaine wasn't really up to visitors now… was he?

"Blaine? Honey wake up. We have to get up." He whispered, kissing his forehead softly. Blaine just groaned and tightened his arms on Kurt. "Come on sweetie. We're going to have visitors."

"Don't want," he murmured in a sleepy voice, not opening his eyes. "Want to stay here. Warm."

"I know honey, but they have good news. It's the glee club, and the Warblers are there too."

Blaine's brow furrowed. "The Warblers?" He repeated. "Why?"

"The New Directions beat them at Regionals, but I guess they wanted to see you, so decided to come back with Finn."

Blaine just groaned again and sat up slowly, yawning widely. "I look a mess – my hair's not even gelled."

Kurt rolled his eyes. "Your hair looks lovely without gel in. Besides, they aren't going to care. We've been asleep all day; we're going to look rough."

He just shrugged and they dragged themselves out of bed. They heard the front door burst open, followed by a loud, excited babble of voices.

"KUUUUUURT" Finn bellowed. "We're here!"

"I know, I can hear that thanks!" Kurt yelled back, rolling his eyes. He gave Blaine a small smile, which was returned, and took his hand, leading him downstairs. Immediately, their friends ran and hugged them. Most of the girls were crying.

"Woah," Kurt said once they'd been released. "What's going on?" He asked Tina.

"We just can't believe you didn't get the chance to sing with us!"

"Yeah, I wanted my dolphins standing next to me." Brittany said tearfully. "It would have been perfect."

"You'll have plenty of opportunities to sing with us Britt," Blaine said, giving her hand a gentle squeeze. She grinned broadly and threw her arms around him again.

"Thank you Blaine Warbler!"

As soon as she'd let go, the group dived into conversation about the competition. As far as they could tell, it had been an extremely close call.

"I'm obviously the reason we won, but everyone was absolutely brilliant-"

"Berry, don't rain on my parade. I'm accepting you at the minute, but I can still beat your ass."

"Don't say that!" said Mercedes, throwing a pillow at Santana. "Now she's going to start singing!"

"No she won't, otherwise I really will kick her ass. I may be a hand down, but I can still do it."

"How bad is your wrist?" Blaine said loudly, changing the subject as quickly as he could.

Santana just shrugged. "It was a pretty simple break. The doc's just said I have to keep this cast on. How're you tribrows? You scared us all yesterday."

He sighed, glancing at Kurt, who gave him an apologetic smile.

"I'm… I'd say I'm fine, but I don't want to lie to you. It's not easy and…"

He hesitated. Finn looked uncomfortable; he obviously knew what was on Blaine's mind. Kurt was watching him closely, as though ready to embrace and comfort him. Then, Blaine's eyes found Jeff's. Jeff knew what had happened and shook his head sadly.

"Oh Blaine," he said quietly. "You can't keep doing this."

"I know," he replied, bowing his head. Jeff let out a quiet sob and stood to pull his best friend into a tight hug.

"I love you Hobbit, remember that, yeah?"

"Woah, what the hell's going on?" Puck said, frowning. "What can't Blaine keep doing?"

"Puck, it isn't any of your business what he does in his spare time. It's-"

"It's fine," Blaine said, cutting off Kurt's words. "I… I think they have a right to know. After all, look at how much they've done for me, right?" When Kurt looked doubtful, he sighed and pulled him into a hug. "I want them to know. If I'm going to be telling a complete stranger about this, then why shouldn't I tell my friends?"

Kurt just nodded and gave him a gentle kiss. Blaine turned to Puck, biting his lip.

"I'm sort of… shit at explaining things. Almost as bad as I am at dealing with pain."

"I don't understand…"

"I'm just going to show you, okay? It's about time my bandages were changed anyway."

"I'll go and get the first aid kit…" Finn mumbled, leaving the room. Blaine watched him go and unwrapped the bandaging on his wrists, holding his breath. As expected, the room exploded.

"Blaine, how the hell could you do that to yourself?"

"Oh honey, what were you thinking?! You should have come to me, you poor boo!"

"Dude that's… that's not good man."

"What? Santana, why would my dolphin do this to himself? It looks painful. What's happening?!"

"I know, I know!" Blaine said, holding up his hands in surrender. "I'm sorry, okay? I know I shouldn't have d-done it!"

"Then why did you?" Rachel demanded.

"It helped me," he snapped back, determined to meet her gaze. "But last night… Kurt found me on the floor, covered in blood and…"

"I thought you were dead," Kurt finished for him in a whisper.

"Yes. Carole helped clean me up. She said it was lucky Kurt found me when I did, otherwise I would have needed to go hospital."

The room was silent, obviously in shock. Finn returned, carrying his mother's first aid box. Blaine started to unravel some material for his bandaging, but Kurt slapped his hand away.

"I'm doing it," he said. Blaine couldn't help but notice he looked faint, but he nodded anyway. Kurt wrapped his arms back up as carefully as he could. "There, good as new… Sort of."

Blaine smiled his thanks and curled up into him on the sofa. The room was silent for a few more minutes before Nick asked the question that was obviously on everyone's minds.

"What happens now?" He said in the softest voice possible, as though he was trying not to spook Blaine.

"I'm going to therapy," he replied, surprised at how steady his voice was. "Kurt's coming with me for his… problems. We're both going to get better."

"Really?" he said, taken aback. "I'm impressed. Not many people are so ready to get better with stuff like this."

"I'm only doing it because I know how much it's hurting Kurt, and now I know how much it hurts all of you. I don't want to live with that on my conscience all the time."

Nick nodded and thankfully, no one said any more on the subject. They were all still relaxing in the living room when Burt and Carole came home. They were both shocked to see how many people were crammed into the one room.

"Um… what's going on?" Burt asked, looking around at them all.

"We won!" Finn said in an excited voice. "We got through to Nationals!"

"Way to go sport!" He said, clapping him on the shoulder. "Congratulations you lot… Oh, and sorry to you guys," he added to the Warblers, who laughed and reassured him it was fine.

"We're going to come and watch you lot in New York anyway!" Thad said, grinning.

"You are?" said Rachel, raising an eyebrow.

"Of course we are! You're our friends… right? We're going to cheer you on every step of the way."

She stared at him in shock. Santana, unable to hide her amusement, cracked up laughing, wiping the tears away from her eyes as she did so.

"Oh my god, this is perfect!" She wheezed.

"What?" Rachel snapped, turning to her.

"The look on your face is priceless! What, did you actually think show choirs don't get on at all? You take things way too seriously Rachel. You need to lighten up a bit!"

Rachel rolled her eyes, not having the courage to retort.

Eventually, the mass of people left. The Warblers all agreed on a day out with Blaine, once his father's trial and his mother's funeral was out of the way. He agreed, feeling that it'd be nice to spend time with them again.

"I love you," Kurt said, leaning against the doorway, his eyes on Blaine.

"I love you too," he replied, grinning slightly.

"You seem a lot happier now."

"It's amazing what friends can do, right?" Kurt just nodded at him. "I'm so glad we won."

"We're going to Nationals – New York baby. Maybe we can visit Cooper."

Blaine frowned, thinking. What was it Rose had said the previous day?

"He's coming to Ohio," he said after a few minutes, "On Monday, for mamma's funeral and my father's trial."

"Oh!" Kurt said, smiling. "That's good then, right? You can introduce me!"

Blaine nodded, a little nervous. "Yeah, I can… I'm sure he'll like you."

"Boys, can you come in here!" Carole's voice called from the kitchen. Kurt and Blaine glanced at each other and walked into the kitchen, where she and Burt were sat around the dining table. They sat down beside each other, opposite the other two.

"We've been talking," Burt said, "Carole's friend is a psychiatrist. She's agreed to let you both come to her for half the price."

"Don't worry, she's brilliant," Carole said softly. "She helped me when Finn's father passed away."

"Right," Kurt said quietly. "Um… when are we going?"

"Well, that's what we wanted to ask you. She said she can start when you want."

"I'll go whenever Blaine wants to."

"Blaine?"

Blaine looked up at Carole and Burt, chewing his lip. He was thinking hard. "Well… Cooper's coming to town on Monday, so I guess he'll want to spend the day with me. The t-trial is next Wednesday, so that wouldn't be good. I want mamma's funeral to be soon, probably on Friday or Saturday. What about the Monday after that? We c-could go after school or something?"

Burt and Carole nodded, smiling.

"That sounds good kiddo. But… are you both going to be alright until then?"

"Yes," said Kurt. "I will. I've… I've lived with this for long enough, another week and a few days won't be too bad."

"I will too," Blaine whispered. "If… If I feel the urge to c-cut, I'll tell Kurt. I promise."

"There's something else too," Burt said. They couldn't help but notice that he looked uncomfortable now. "Um… I know you're a couple. And I know you like sleeping next to each other. So… if you want to share a room, it's fine. Obviously we'll keep both bedrooms the way they are, but… we won't ask you to sleep separately, not if you don't want to."

"You'd do that for us dad?"

Burt nodded. "You said to me that you both sleep better when you're together. I only want what's best – for both of you."

"Thank you so much Mr Hummel," Blaine managed to whisper. Burt rolled his eyes but ruffled his curls.

"Go on you two, go and do… whatever. Dinner will be ready soon."

They stood up and left. Both of them felt slightly happier – they'd won a place in Nationals, they were going to get help, Blaine was going to see Cooper, his father would be locked away, and Karofsky would be caught and made to pay for what he did to Kurt.

"Blaine?" Kurt said once they were alone in his basement bedroom, lying entwined on the bed.

"Yes?"

"Do you suddenly feel like everything's going to get a lot better?"

"Yes," he admitted. "I do. Why, don't you?"

"Of course I do. But… I think I'm just happy right now."

"Can I ask why?"

A small smile spread across Kurt's lips. "I'm here with you."

"You're going soft Kurt," Blaine whispered. Kurt flicked his nose playfully. "Okay, ow. Sorry!"

"I'll still kick your ass."

"I don't doubt it. But can we just stay like this for now? I feel relaxed, like I can just… be."

Kurt nodded, pulling him closer. He planted a gentle kiss on his lips. Yes, it looked as though things were finally starting to look better for the two of them.