Kurt Hummel was pissed off. Everything was going wrong this morning. Everything, from the stupid alarm clock, the coffee machine, the toaster… hell, even his hair products were acting weird. So when Kurt arrived at the station with a frown on his face, no one was more scared that Finn.
Everyone cringed as Kurt stalked to his office, forgoing with his usual cheery “Good morning Ladies!”.
They could tell that being on their best behaviour would be mandatory today, even Santana would be cautious today. And that was saying something especially since she usually had the guts to address their Captain by ‘Lady Lips’.

Unfortunately Lieutenant Finn had the job of giving Kurt the package that had arrived for him this morning from Sheriff Sylvester. Hesitantly he approached the door, knocking quietly. The only response he got was a grunt.

“Ummmm… Captain I have a package for you here. Sue sent it.” Finn quickly handed him the thick box before he hightailed out of there.

Annoyed Kurt opened the box, seeing three sets of police uniforms in it, the necessary weapons and items and a letter. Kurt opened the letter.

Hey Porcelain,

This is the uniform for your new boy toy. It’s been made to be form fitting, I thought you’d appreciate it. You can oogle him all you want now, and don’t grope him too much. I sent you three sets cuz I know that you might get horny at the station and they might stain. I know that you’re kinky Hummel, don’t deny it. Also remember that I won’t mind if he’s littered with hickeys, but keep it to a minimum. People tend to not respect officers that look bruised and limp a lot.

Have a good day Porcelain. Don’t forget to follow in my footsteps.
Sue

Everyone cringed as they heard a scream.

“FUCK YOU SUE!!!”

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Blaine Anderson wasn’t a happy camper. He hasn’t had much in his life after he was kicked out of his home. Ya he started to make money later in life, a lot of money, but those were all put away in bank accounts. If you weren’t a big boss, and you wanted to lay low… It was a rule of the trade to make sure that you didn’t live in luxury. And Blaine had never felt the urge to use that money. So all Blaine had was a tiny one room studio apartment, in a shady neighbourhood. But now he had to lose even that. Sylvester told him to cut all the connections he had with the underworld life, and that meant selling the apartment.

So here he was in front of the station, ready to start a new life with only the clothes on this back and a single luggage. He hated how he’s had to start anew over and over. This was mainly why he took Sue’s offer. He wanted to live his life how he’d imagined it to be before his parent threw him out. And this was his only chance to do it. At first he’d thought that he’d have to change his behaviour totally once he starts the job but Sue had told him that unless if he killed someone in cold blood or betrayed them, he could act like himself or however he wanted to. He especially remembered the last words he was told ‘If you want to annoy Hummel, it’s no skin off my back. Just know that Porcelain isn’t as fragile as he looks’.

Blaine smirked, finally ready to start a new life again. People were starting to look at him; he had to admit that he kind of looked like a hobo. Especially with the overgrown afro like hair, and the worn ripped cloths. Hey, when you’re a low laying criminal, you didn’t have time to worry about fashion.

As Blaine dragged his luggage through the doors of the station, he could feel all eyes on him. The station had been quiet when he’d come in, but now it was as if there we no human beings present now. It didn’t take long before he was approached by someone. A gorgeous Latino woman came up to him, looking him up and down.

“Honey, did you not go to school? I’m sorry but this is the police station, the homeless shelter is in the opposite side two roads away. Did you come here for directions?” Santana Lopez was a mean bitch, but even she knew to when to restrict herself.

Despite the harsh words, for some odd reason Blaine could tell that she was trying to be kind to him.
Rolling his eyes Blaine started to speak, only to be interrupted by someone. Well it was more like a scream that interrupted him.

“WHAT THE HELL ARE YOU DOING HERE?”

Blaine looked up to see that it was that first officer that had tried to apprehend him during the drug raid. The one that later knocked him out. Blaine scowled, ‘Figures Sue would send me to this hell hole.’

The Latina spoke up, “Finn I know that the homeless aren’t the most attractive, but they can’t help it. They don’t have access to everything we have. Even I know that you shouldn’t be outright mean to the less unfortunate.”

Finn just gave her a WTF look. “Dude what are you talking about? This guy is a CRIMINAL. Why haven’t you put him behind bars yet?! Remember the drug raid? Oh fuck, you didn’t go with us then. Anyway he was one of the ones we caught!!! Santana hold him, he’s a mean son of a bitch. He’s the one that broke Sam’s leg, gave Mike a concussion and gave Artie that bruise. And let’s not even mention what he did to me!!!”

Santana was looking at the guy with new eyes. “Babe, you’re cute for a hobo, but you didn’t tell me you’re a criminal too. Look I let the hobos go, but not rule breakers. …unless if you’re a prostitute. Those bitches have hard lives. Sorry but I gotta take you in.”

Santana was might look like a pretty lady, but she was one of the toughest fighters in NYC. She was Kurt’s Lieutenant as well of course. The only reason she hadn’t been at the drug raid was because she’d been working undercover during that time.

Finn and Santana both started to advance on Blaine, who was starting to look a little irritated with the situation at the moment.

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Kurt had just gotten off the phone with Sue. He’d had a very unpleasant conversation with her, and learned some facts and news that he really hadn’t wanted to know. Especially one little detail that was bugging him a lot. The situation had just become more complicated.

Therefore Kurt didn’t pay much attention when he heard the shouting. His station tended to be rowdy on the best days. However he was a little surprised that they had started so soon, usually they’re more cautious on the days he’s in a bad mood. However when after five minutes he could hear the commotion getting worse, and especially after hearing the sound of items falling to the ground, Kurt gave up on ignoring the whole thing.

His jaw dropped when he saw what was happening. It looked like around five officers had some guy on the floor, trying to subdue him. In the process, a lot of items from the nearby desks had fallen to the ground, not to mention many files and countless papers. But what actually broke the camel’s back was the toppled over designer lamp he’s bought to brighten up the station.

“What the HELL are you doing?! Who touched my lamp!?” Screamed Kurt, fists clenched at his sides.

Everyone froze, it was never very good when the Captain swore, and it was suicidal when anyone touched the lamp. Everyone hurried moving back to their stations. In ten seconds it was only Santana and Finn that were holding down Blaine. The moment Kurt saw exactly whom they were holding down his expression darkened. He could tell exactly what had happened.

Snorting Kurt ordered “Let the hobo puppy go. He’s not a danger. Instead I’d ask that you guys fix this mess. And if everything is not exactly how it was by the time I come back out, the consequences won’t be …pleasant.” Kurt gave them a sneer.

It didn’t take Finn more than a second to do as told. He might be one of those slow people, but there was only one exception when he acted fast, and that was when Kurt Hummel was involved. That’s partially why Sue assigned him to this station, despite all the crying and pleading she had to see.

Santana was more reluctant as she let the boy go, wondering what was going on. She knew that they’d get their answers, probably after everything was cleaned up.

As Blaine got up slowly, he looked up at the man that had been responsible for his capture. He still couldn’t believe that this lithe girly looking man was a Captain, and one that Sylvester trusted implicitly. Oh Blaine had heard a lot about Kurt Hummel, yet he had a hard time relating everything to the image in front of him. But when he remembered those cold blue eyes, he could believe that the man had done half the things he’d heard. But at the moment, the ever changing eyes are green in colour.

Kurt took a look at the man glaring at him, and rolling his eyes, he grabbed the boy’s oversized sleeve and pulled him into his office.

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They’ve been staring at each other for the past ten minutes. Well Blaine might just have been staring, but Kurt had been analyzing the other. He tried to look past the insane hairdo, the old oversized clothes, and the thick beard. Unfortunately the terrible fashion kept distracting him. Finally getting tired of it all, he got ready to discuss the hard parts.

“So, I heard you turned good now.” Started Kurt tentatively. Ya, he was pissed with the situation, but if he had to live with the guy and work with him for so long… well no one would blame him for trying to get along.

Unfortunately, Blaine didn’t have the same mind set. “Cut to the chase pretty, I don’t have time for your shit. Tell me what I gotta do, when I gotta start and where I can put my shit. By the why, how long do I have to suffer your girly company?”

Yup, Kurt was right when he’d thought that he wouldn’t have liked the guy. OH and wow, a tick had even formed on his forehead. Sometimes he wished that he was allowed to use his handgun without reserve.

“Look kid, let’s not get off on the wrong foot. I’m gonna be your Captain, and your roommate for the next two years. Believe me when I say that I can make your life hell. You DON’T want to push me. You wanted a new start right? Well I’m giving you one, try to act a little gracious.”

The comment about a new start hit Blaine a little too close to home. He grumbled a little about ‘wtf I’m not much younger than you’, ‘like as if you’d be able to do anything to me’ before something dawned on him.

Blaine looked Kurt in the eyes, a frightened look on his face “w-what di-did you say? T-two y-years?” Even Blaine could tell that it sounded like he was going to pass out anytime soon.

Kurt looked grimly at the boy sitting across from him. Remembering the epic shouting match he had with Sue. He grimaced “Be grateful that it’s two years, she was insisting on five at first. Two years with you so that the road for my career will be empty of adversary. And for you I’d recommend you think differently too. Two years of your life so that you can be free for the rest of your life.”

Seeing that Blaine still looked a little nauseous, Kurt didn’t mention the last comment Sue had made.
“I had wanted to give you more time to fuck him. If you want to deny my generosity Porcelain, you’ll be the one regretting it later. Also remember that you can dress him up in maid clothes.”
Yup, Sue was one messed up bitch.

Wanting to move to another issue Kurt started to talk again. “Anyway, you don’t really have any duties at the moment. We already have your paperwork done, and I’ll teach you stuff as we go along. For the moment think of yourself as my assistant. I have to see where your talent lay before I give you stuff to do. For today, we’re going to get you looking like a police officer. Frankly you look like a stinky hobo, a particularly unattractive one.”

Blaine looked offended. Ok so he knew that he didn’t look his best, but there had been a lot going on!
“Hey! I don’t look that bad!”
The look he got back in response clearly stated that he indeed did look that bad.

Ignoring Blaine, Kurt continued. “So first we’ll go to my house to drop off your stuff, then we’ll get you a haircut, a shave, new clothes, etc. Basically you’re in dire need of a makeover. Especially if you’re going to be living with me.” Kurt sniffed, looking down at the boy.

Blaine was pissed, he wanted to retort but the glare directed at him and the ‘designer lamp’ incident that had everyone scrambling away made him reconsider his actions. Perhaps just this once, he’d let the other boy do what he wanted.

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When Kurt and Blaine came out of the office, Blaine was surprised to see that the station was once again spotless. Everyone looked and paid attention when Kurt cleared his throat.

“I have an announcement to make. And don’t you dare interrupt in the middle.” Everyone nodded obediently.
“This is Blaine Anderson. And he’ll be the newest member of our Police station.” This of course made many gasp but before they could protest, the glare Kurt directed toward them shut everyone up.

“As I was saying, he will be one of us from now on. He’ll start of as my assistant, later I might assign him on patrols with one of you, but that’ll depend. He’ll be with me most of the time. I’m serious when I say that I don’t want anyone treating him badly, if I hear a single word about such incidents…… I hope for your sake that won’t happen. This was an order that came directly from Sylvester. He’s made some mistakes in life, but now he’ll be an asset for us.” After the speech, Kurt looked at them inquiringly.

And as if on cue, everyone started to clap hesitantly. In response Blaine gave them a weak wave. Yup, it was going to be hard.

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When Kurt parked the car in front of his apartment building, Blaine looked around curiously. As they entered the apartment, Blaine was a little disappointed. Oh the small apartment was designed fabulously, but Blaine had expected that someone like Kurt would live in a nicer neighbourhood. Perhaps in a nicely decorated house.

Shrugging, Blaine dropped his luggage, turning to Kurt. “So where’s my room?”
Kurt winced, knowing that the hard part had come. He pointed at the couch.

“Ok, I get it. Stop kidding. Is the room filled with junk or something? We have the whole day, and I’ll move all the stuff. I want to rest in my room, I’ve had enough of sofas.”
Avoiding eye contact, Kurt mumbled “This is a one room apartment. We’re not sharing my tiny room… So you get the couch.”

Hearing the silence Kurt looked up, only to see that Blaine had his mouth wide open.
“y-you must be Kidding me!!! What the hell do you mean there’s only ONE ROOM!!!???” By the end, Blaine was shouting practically. “I can’t live for two years on a couch!”

Shrugging helplessly Kurt replied “We’ll get you a pull out couch.” Which only enraged Blaine further.
“OK, HELL NO. WE’re getting a new place to live, and that’s final.”

Kurt didn’t like where this was going. Actually Sue had offered them a government apartment, but Kurt had refused. He didn’t want anything Sue might give, knowing the apartment might be filled with cameras for blackmail material or some other thing. He’d considered the option for a second, but the creepy laugh Sue had given…. That had been the incentive for changing his mind.

“Look I don’t have enough money to buy a new house.” It hurt to admit but Kurt really didn’t have enough money. When he was the sheriff he’d have a much higher wage, but being Captain didn’t pay millions of dollars. Not to mention with his expensive taste in clothes, it was no wonder that he hadn’t managed to buy a house yet. Actually he could probably buy a condo with the money he had saved, but if he was going to buy a house, he wanted to buy the perfect one. Not just settle for something.

Blaine could see that Kurt felt uncomfortable admitting the fact, and he didn’t feel like discussing exactly why the other boy didn’t have enough money.

“Look, It’s ok if you don’t have any money. I may look like a hobo. But I’ve saved quite a bit. Don’t know the exact amount, but I know it’s over ten million, and I looked at that amount last year. Don’t look at me like that. It was honest money. Mostly from delivering news or information in tough times, and nothing that got innocent people killed. So it’s not blood money. And then I invested the money smartly and it tripled. I want to buy a house anyway, so you can just live with me until we don’t have to anymore.” Offered Blaine. He didn’t have anything else he would do with the money anyways. And if he was going to live with Hummel for two years, then he wanted both of them to live comfortably.

If Kurt was a nicer man, he would’ve protested. Or just bought that condo. But in this case he saw nothing wrong with Blaine’s plan. I mean why not? If the money was from ‘honest’ work, then he had no problems with living somewhere that was more comfortable. He’d wanted to move out anyway. And also since it was nearly the end of the month, he’d have no trouble with cutting the rent.

Blaine was happy when Kurt agreed.

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After the whole house discussion, Kurt dragged Blaine to a building near the mall telling him that they might as well use all that black money he had for a good cause. And currently at the moment Blaine was scared for his life. Kurt had shoved him in a hair salon or something that had a big neon sign near the door. And was currently exchanging air kisses with some ridiculously flamboyant guy. What was even scarier was that Kurt was still in full police regalia.

“I brought you a tough project Henrie, but I can’t trust anyone else but you with this.” Kurt was telling the guy, gesturing towards Blaine.

‘Henrie’ dramatically gasped, putting a hand over his mouth. “OH my goodness baby, where did you pick up this…thing? Oh my god, it certainly will be a handful. Don’t worry sweetheart, I’ve yet to let you down. I’m sure we can turn it into a human today. I’m a miracle worker after all.”

‘Seriously?! NOT HUMAN? What the hell! ‘ Blaine was really angry at the moment. He felt like spitting on the plucked eyebrow guy’s face and stomping out of the store. The only thing that stopped him was the glare Kurt directed towards him.

“I knew I could count on you Henrie” Kurt smiled, giving him a pat on the arm. Henrie dramatically swirled around, tossing his head of pink hair in pleasure. He walked toward a private area, collection various products as he went. “Set him up for me will you Kurt baby?”

Kurt pulled Blaine along.
“What the hell is this?! Where the fuck did you bring me!? That fucker sa—“ Before he could continue Kurt shushed him, whispering “Shut up. Look Blaine, I know that Henrie can be offensive, and is a little eccentric, but he really is a miracle worker. OK? Like for most people they wait months before they can get an appointment with him. And those people that wait? They’re big celebrities Blaine, I won’t even mention some of the names. Did you not notice that this isn’t some hair salon at the mall? This is an exclusive place, and the only reason you’re getting an instant make over is because he happens to be a close friend of mine. So shut up before I kill you!”

Blaine sniffed, muttering “Ha, friend. As if, more like fuck buddy.” Thinking that Kurt didn’t hear he was surprised when he rounded up on Blaine. Snarling “NOT fuck buddy. Ex boyfriend ok?!”

Blaine was shocked for a minute. Ok it hadn’t been hard to tell that Kurt was gay, but he was surprised to know that he’d dated Henrie. “Why’d you break up?” He asked curiously.
Kurt laughed sarcastically “Why do you think?”
For the first time Blaine nodded with sympathy, sharing a knowing look with Kurt.

As the pink haired boy twirled around, wondering everywhere like a pixie, cutting Blaine’s hair, his nails, etc, Blaine observed the other. He was surprised to see that even though the guy had that shocking mane of pink hair, Henrie was actually pretty attractive. Blaine could see why Kurt might have dated the guy, even if only for his physical beauty. Though he was really starting to annoy Blaine. Especially with all the little touches he’d give Kurt and all those kisses on the cheeks. ‘Doesn’t the guy get that they broke up?’ That guy really was annoying.

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They had him with his back to a full length mirror. Blaine was decked up in the police uniform Kurt had bought with him. And he was pretty happy that all the primping had been completed. He still didn’t know what kind of changes Henrie had done to him, as Henrie hadn’t let him see himself in the mirror, exclaiming that a surprise was always the best thing. As they stared at him in approval, Blaine shifted nervously.

Henrie was whipping fake tears out of his eyes, exclaiming “I Have made a Human Kurt!”
In the meanwhile Kurt eyes were roaming all over Blaine, which for some reason was making Blaine blush. “Hmmmmm… Sue was right. Anyway, Henrie you’ve done an awesome job. You really are magical.”

As Henrie preened under the praise, Blaine became annoyed and just turned around to look at himself. For a moment his heart nearly stopped beating. Oh it wasn’t because they had turned him into a supermodel, though he had to admit that he looked damn fine. But it was because he’s known a similar image. He looked like how he would’ve if he had been allowed to continue his education, if he hadn’t suddenly become homeless. He looked like a grown up version of that young charismatic, sweet boy that used to go to Dalton Academy. Blaine was filled with a sense of nostalgia. Sure he didn’t look like that 15 year old boy, he’d grown up after all. He had more definition on his face, no more baby fat, and a hell lot more muscle. Not to mention he definitely didn’t have a helmet head, Henrie had done something so that instead of a mess, he had medium length soft ebony curls. He really did look good. But Blaine couldn’t help the sheen of tears that appeared in his eyes for a second.

Even though it was just for a second, Kurt had caught that look. And he didn’t have any trouble connecting the dots, remembering that before he became homeless, Blaine was actually a rich private school boy. Kurt gently ushered Henrie out of the changing room, yelling on his way out.

“Blaine, you can change back onto your homeless clothes. We’re going directly to the shopping mall anyway.”

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If Blaine had thought the trip to Henrie was bad, then shopping had been hell. He knew that Kurt liked fashion, but it was only during shopping that he got a taste of just how crazy his new roommate was. All Blaine remembered from the trip was being in changing rooms, trying on piles of clothes. Oh and the fact that he actually spent nearly seventy thousand dollars on clothes and accessories. He tried to protest, but was shut up by the dirty glare Kurt would direct in his way. When they finally came home, Kurt explained the reason behind the crazy shopping trip. They only had a few bags with them as they entered the apartment. Kurt had taken only a few of the clothes and told them to hold the rest. Saying that they were moving and that he’d send them the address to deliver the stuff.

“Look Blaine, I know that it was a little crazy today but it was necessary.”
“What do you mean it was necessary? I spend seventy thousand dollars on meaningless stuff!”
Ok Blaine shouldn’t have said that, Kurt was giving him that scary glare again.
“It’s not meaningless. And you might as well use that illegal money on something useful. When I learned that you had money and you still dressed like a hobo bohemian poet, I could tell that you really must not like shopping. With the amount of clothes we bought today, it’ll last you at least six months before you have to buy even one new outfit. And ya, I know you’re thinking that since we wear a uniform we don’t need outside clothes much. And ya that might have been true if you had been assigned to any other captain. However I’m on my way up the ladder, so I have to attend quite a few events where you’ll be tagging along. Not to mention you won’t be growing up anytime soon, no matter how much you may wish otherwise. Think of the new wardrobe as an investment.”

Blaine glared at Kurt when he heard the dig on his height. Not wanting to argue with the boy anymore, Blaine pouted and walked away. Kurt felt a little bad, but just for a second.

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As Blaine lay on the sofa that night trying to sleep, he was oddly feeling the best he had in years. For some reason, even when he was bickering with Kurt the whole day, the other boy made him feel like as if everything would now be alright. Blaine finally felt as if he was fixing up his life.

It was weird though, because he’d never meet someone like Kurt in his life. He could tell that there was a lot of things about the boy that he didn’t know. Kurt could be cold one minute, and hot in the next. For example, even though he had insulted Blaine the whole day, before going to sleep he’d given Blaine warm milk and chocolate chip cookies to help him go to sleep faster. Blaine had been really touched by the tender gesture. Of course Kurt had ruined it a little when his parting remark had been “Don’t drool on the sofa puppy.”

Blaine squirmed a little, feeling like a little boy with a crush. He didn’t want to like Kurt, but the other boy made him feel something. Not wanting to think about anything anymore, Blaine snuggled into the pillow that smelled like Kurt and went fast to sleep.