Nov. 16, 2011, 7:27 a.m.
Out Of The Closet: Chapter 5. The colors of friendship
E - Words: 2,953 - Last Updated: Nov 16, 2011 Story: Complete - Chapters: 10/10 - Created: Oct 29, 2011 - Updated: Nov 16, 2011 1,240 0 0 1 0
Author’s notes: Before you start to read this chapter, make sure you have a toothbrush on hand. I have a feeling you may need it. I may have overfluffed, Just a bit.
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5. THE COLORS OF FRIENDSHIP
The move goes smoothly and at 4 p.m. Blaine is basically settled in his new apartment - his fridge and cupboards well stocked, his electronics connected, and he can finally relax. His hand finds the phone without thought and before he knows it, Kurt’s voice is in his ear, sounding edgy and tired.
“Hi Blaine.”
“Hi! Do you have any plans for tonight?”
“Yes. I’m going to keep looking at my ceiling. It’s very interesting today.”
Blaine frowns.
“Everything alright?”
“Sure. Just a weird mood.”
“Oh. How bad is it? Because I hoped you could come.”
“Sorry, not feeling like sex today. Oh crap. See? Weird mood. Did you mean come over, see your new place?”
Blaine suppresses an urge to joke; not today, not with this mood. And the topic is still sensitive anyway.
“Yeah, I thought you could come by and we could go out somewhere.”
“I guess I could pry my eyes from the ceiling and move. I’m getting bored anyway. Did you have anywhere particular in mind?”
“Not really, we can think about it when you’re here.”
Kurt’s voice is heavy with reproach.
“Blaine! I need to know what to wear.”
“Oh, right. Something casual.”
“Okay. Give me your address, I’ll be there around six.”
They end up going for dinner at a Mexican restaurant they used to frequent at least once a month in college. Neither of them has been there since they fell apart. The food is still as delicious – and hot – as they remembered and when they emerge two hours later they are full, taste buds burned off, laughing like two loons over some old memories. Going home through a park, they happen to see a concert on a small outside stage – some local band, and it’s pretty good, so they stay. Drinks in a cozy bar nearby afterwards are a perfect end of the evening.
“I can’t believe your place is not even five minutes’ walk from mine,” Kurt giggles as they walk back near midnight. They are both tipsy, but not enough to call it drunk. “It’s totally awesome!”
“Yeah, it is.” Blaine is warm and happy, and he feels like grabbing Kurt’s hand, but he remembers that he’s not supposed to, even though right now he isn’t sure why exactly, so he doesn’t. Still, the sole presence of his friend, the wonderful evening they spent together, and the feeling that he’s finally in the right place make him buzz with excitement. He feels like singing and grins at the thought that when he goes home, he can play his guitar or keyboard all night if he wants to, or write a song, because this is his life now, a life where he can choose what to do, what to like and where to work. Unable to contain his joy, he starts skipping, and Kurt joins him, and by the time they reach Blaine’s building, they’re breathless and laughing hysterically. It takes them a while to calm down, because they keep infecting each other with more hilarity until they have no idea what they’re laughing about and their muscles ache.
“Oh god, I missed you. I missed this.” Kurt is wiping his eyes with a sleeve, still grinning.
“Me too. I don’t remember when I last laughed that much.” Blaine chuckles. He feels light, immune to all of life’s troubles right now. It won’t last, but even a few hours like this feels like heaven. “So, we repeat this tomorrow?”
Kurt shakes his head, his smile soft and easy now.
“No, it’s Saturday. I’ve got plans.”
“Like, a date?” Blaine asks before he can stop himself, his tongue too loose after the drinks. Not that it’s any of his business.
“No, I have this… thing I do every Saturday morning. It’s something very special to me. And after that I’m driving to Lima, to visit my family. I’ll be back Sunday evening.”
“Oh, okay.” The happy feeling is slowly leaving Blaine, like air from a punctured balloon. He’s used to being alone, but the last few days with Kurt had reminded him how much better life is with a friend.
“Unless…” Kurt hesitates. “Would you like to join me? You could help me with my morning thing and then go home with me. My family always liked you, they’d be glad to see you again.”
Blaine raises his brows, trying not to look too hopeful.
“Are you sure it would be okay?”
“Of course. I’d love it.”
“Then I’d be happy to join you.”
“Great. I’ll pick you up at 8:30 then. You can bring your guitar if you still play. And an overnight bag, we’ll be going to Lima right from there.” Kurt smiles widely and turns to walk home. Blaine calls after him.
“Wait, Kurt wait! What’s this thing? What do I need to know?”
His friend turns his head, smiling mischievously.
“You’ll see. Remember, 8:30! Dress for comfort. And you’d better be awake and not hung-over, you’ll need all your wits about you for this.” Kurt chuckles and disappears around a corner.
During the 20-minute drive the next morning, Kurt adamantly refuses to tell Blaine where they are going, insisting that it’s a surprise, but the playful gleam in his eyes is unsettling. They park the car on a side street and he follows Kurt through a small green gate, along a narrow path framed by lush grass and lots of colorful flowers, to an unremarkable door, where they ring a bell and wait. Soon, a smiling woman about their age opens it.
“Kurt, hi! Oooh, you brought help? Great, you’ll need it, we already have 24 today.”
“Hi Daisy. This is my friend Blaine.” The girl smiles dazzlingly, shaking Blaine’s guitar-free hand, and Kurt snorts. “Don’t bother, baby, he’s just as gay as I am, only he hides it better.”
She sighs dramatically, the twinkle still in her eyes. “It’s not fair, why are all you gorgeous boys either taken or gay? Are you two at least together?”
Kurt answers in monotone, as if it’s a conversation he knows by heart, but there’s amusement in his voice.
“No, we’re not. And no, I don’t want you to find me a date, thank you very much, Daisy.”
She laughs. “You’re no fun, Kurt. But I’ll convince you one day, you’ll see. Okay, go, the kids can’t wait to see you. Lizzie’s been practicing all week, she’s going to knock your socks off, you’ll see.”
“What has she prepared?”
“Celine Dion.”
“Oh my. Ambitious.” Looking at Blaine, he adds. “She’s got a voice to die for and true diva potential. You’d never believe that a year ago she didn’t even know she could sing.”
Daisy nods, then looks back to Kurt. “Oh, and Tommy’s back.”
“Oh no.”
“Yeah. It didn’t work out. So he may be a little morose today.”
“We’ll try to cheer him up then.”
“Well, if anyone can, you do. I’ll be going then, see you later.” She waves her hand and goes up the stairs.
Blaine feels overwhelmed and lost, not knowing what’s going on. He can guess there’s singing involved and a big group of kids, and he considers going back to the car and waiting for Kurt there, because as an only child without extensive family, he never really had much contact with kids; he doesn’t know how to talk to one, let alone 24. Before he can say anything though, they’ve reached the door with big purple notes on it and Kurt turns to him, chuckles and says “Don’t panic,” before he opens the door and all hell breaks loose.
A gang of young kids – the oldest no more than ten years old – surrounds them immediately, talking all at once, touching, pushing in, and Blaine feels trapped against the door. Kurt seems to be in his element though, laughing and chatting with the little ones, asking a question here, admiring something held in a small sticky hand there, generous with his attention, praise, and hugs. Blaine wonders how he – they? – will ever manage to achieve any fraction of order here, but then Kurt speaks up, his stage voice on.
“Okay munchkins, settle down now and let’s start the fun.”
Blaine watches, amazed, as the group disperses without a word of protest, each child taking a cushion from a colorful pile in the corner and sitting on the floor. There are still whispers and giggles, and some arguments over the “best” seats, but everyone seems to be on their best behavior. How did Kurt manage that?
Without the kids running around, Blaine can see the room clearly now – although frankly, there’s not much to see. It seems to be just a big classroom, completely empty except for a small wooden stage against the far wall, a worn-out looking piano in a corner beside it and shelves with stacks of recorders, xylophones and a couple of tambourines and maracas. He finishes his quick observation as Kurt speaks again.
“Okay, little ones, I’ve brought you a guest. This is Mister Blaine. He’s going to play with us today.”
There’s a chorus of “Hi, Mister Blaine”. He waves his hand, hoping his nerves don’t show. Kurt smiles at him encouragingly before turning back to the kids.
“Mister Blaine has never played our games before, so we’ll have to teach him, but I’m sure he learns quickly. Now, why don’t you all tell him who you are. I can see new faces here today, so I’ll get to know those too.”
It must be a well known routine, because there’s no confusion or disorder. The kids stand up one by one to say their names and something about themselves. There’s Peter who collects dinosaurs, bouncy Lizzie who loves to sing “on that big stage, Mister Blaine”, there’s Tommy, a delicate 6-year-old with sad eyes, and red-haired twins, Rebecca and Robin, who want to be firefighters, and so many others Blaine doesn’t manage to remember all the names at once. The last one to get up is Romeo, a bulky Latino with a mischievous smile who likes to draw monsters and wants to know if Blaine is “Mister Kurt’s boyfriend”.
The worst nerves gone by now, Blaine smiles.
“No, but I’m Mister Kurt’s friend.”
Romeo nods his head with a serious expression before sitting back down.
“Good. It’s very important to have friends.”
“Yes it is.” Blaine smiles at Kurt, who nods approvingly. Maybe it won’t be so bad after all.
“Okay.” Kurt claps his hands. “Now we’ll warm up our voices, and then our bodies. Everyone choose their own syllable to sing, but it has to be different than last time. Mister Blaine, could you accompany us on the piano?”
Blaine sits at the piano; it’s old, but in good working condition. He runs through some scales and simple warm-up exercises, a chorus of la-la’s, mi-mi’s, be-be’s and all different variations creating a cacophony in the room. Then Kurt asks the kids to get up and return the cushions to the pile in the corner, and guides them through some stretches and bounces.
“Okay, now it’s time for our animal warm-up. Why don’t we try to make it a little funnier today - but also a bit more tricky? I’ll tell you what animals you are, and your job is to walk around imitating them and making the proper noises. But today, Mister Blaine will play us music that’s going to tell us how fast the animals go. Sometimes they will run and sometimes they’ll move slowly or even stop. You need to listen to the music to know what to do. Are you ready?”
They answer him with a chorus of enthusiastic yes’s, and Blaine nods his head, seeing Kurt’s questioning look. Sure, he can do this. For the next five minutes he plays random melodies, changing tempo and style every so often, while Kurt calls out names of animals, always with accompanying adjectives, and the children have fun emulating them. By the end of the exercise Blaine lets go of the rest of his nervousness and is laughing uncontrollably watching a group of “very lazy old cats” rolling around on the carpeted floor. Kurt leads them through an exercise in acting out emotions then, Blaine providing the proper mood with background music, unasked.
He’s surprised with how much fun he’s having. The kids are noisy and energetic, but so enthusiastic and they obviously love the class. For the next hour and a half he watches with amazement as Kurt directs acting exercises and group singing glee-style, improvisations and talent show, with effortless control and lots of humor. Blaine doesn’t just watch, of course. He provides accompaniment with his guitar and sings along with everybody, he takes part in the acting exercises when he’s asked and participates in the standing ovations for the kids who choose to sing solo, Lizzie nailing All By Myself and shy Simon making a brave – and not bad at all – attempt at a recent hit.
By the time they take the children outside to play with them in the sun for the last half hour, Blaine is already everyone’s friend. And when Daisy comes back at 11 to take over, he finds himself sad to leave, with hugs and invitations to come again.
Once they’re back in the car, Kurt turns to him, beaming.
“I knew you’d be perfect! They loved you.”
“It was great! I loved it too. What is this place anyway?”
Kurt’s eyes grow wide.
“You haven’t guessed? It’s a group home.”
“A group home? As in…” Blaine feels his stomach drop.
“Yeah, all of these kids are either orphans or have been taken away from abusive or otherwise bad families.”
“Oh god, really? All of them? But they seem so… cheerful!”
“They’re kids. It’s in their nature. But they have it harder than any child should have. They aren’t always cheerful, believe me. I’ve seen many of them sad, broken and shutting the world out. These classes help them; they learn to express themselves, to deal with their feelings. That’s why I love doing it.”
Kurt starts the car and they back out of the side street, turning towards the expressway.
“How long have you been teaching here?”
“Almost three years. I started a week after your lovely note.” Kurt smirks, but Blaine knows there’s no real anger in there, just teasing. Still, he feels the guilt again. “I was down and itching for something to fill the empty space you left in my life, and then one day I heard a conversation in a café about this place and how the children could really use something to channel their emotions, like arts maybe, but there wasn’t enough money. I acted on impulse, which doesn’t happen all that often, as you know, and asked the two girls if I could join them. One of them was Daisy. Things went from there. Besides the classes, I come by every now and then when I have a free day, to help with homework or just spend time with the kids. I’ve seen many of them come and go – most of them are waiting on adoption, you know. That’s what Daisy was talking about today – Tommy was placed two weeks ago, but it didn’t work out and he had to come back. It’s always tough.” Kurt shakes his head and laughs bashfully. “You need to stop me. I could talk about this for hours if you don’t.”
Blaine looks at him softly.
“I think it’s wonderful, what you do for them. Would you mind if I joined you again next week maybe?”
Kurt’s eyes are focused on the road, but Blaine can see smile in his profile.
“I’d love that. You can join me whenever you want, even permanently. It’s even more fun this way.”
And Blaine doesn’t say anything, but he already knows he will. He left a tiny piece of his heart back there, with those children.
The visit with Kurt’s family reminds Blaine why he always envied his friend. They welcome him warmly, like they used to, and treat him like he belongs there. It’s heartwarming and relaxing, and all kinds of nice. Kurt must have told them at least a bit of his recent story, because nobody asks him any uncomfortable questions. They talk, play board games and watch movies, there’s a lot of noise and laughter since Finn is also there with his fiancée Michelle. The weather is perfect, so they end up barbecuing in the back yard. When they drive back to Columbus Sunday evening, Blaine feels relaxed and accepted, and he can’t help but to reflect on how big a turn his life has taken since he left that hotel room just a week ago. He knows he wouldn’t change it for the world now.