CHAPTER 27

Autumn came and life returned to its normal, mundane flow. And yet, being married still felt new and amazing. Married. They were husbands. Kurt and Blaine Hummel. Sometimes Kurt had to stop whatever he was doing and take a deep breath or pinch himself, he was so overwhelmed with the thought. Sometimes it still felt like a dream.

The only thing missing now was a child.

Of course, it was way too early for kids, assuming Blaine even wanted any at all – they hadn't had this conversation yet. He was barely twenty-two after all, probably not ready to think about it, and Kurt wasn't about to go and plant the question in his head now. It could lead to all sorts of trouble – he could say no and Kurt would get upset, which would lead to Blaine feeling guilty and maybe changing his mind before he was ready, and really, that wouldn't be good for anyone. No, it was better to wait a few years – and who knew, maybe the topic would surface on its own at some point.

Except it was torturously hard not to alert his husband to the baby fever that Kurt had suddenly developed. Babies in ads were making him teary-eyed! He only resisted peeking into strollers because it was New York. People were wary of such behaviors here.

So when Julian's wedding anniversary approached a few months later and he joked that the best gift would be the ability to take his wife out to dinner and a movie without worrying about their three little ones, the youngest of which was barely two months, Kurt had a serious dilemma. On one hand, he had plenty of experience with kids – or at least a kid – and he'd love to let his friends have some much-needed time alone. On the other, he knew it would only make the ache worse.

In the end, he agreed and took Blaine who, it turned out, was eager to help. The kids were all asleep by the time they were left alone with them. Everything was quiet and peaceful – for about an hour, until the baby's pitiful mewl came from the crib in his parent’s bedroom.

"I've got it." Kurt was on his feet in an instant. "Keep watching, I've seen this episode."

Teddy was lying in his crib with his blanket kicked off and tangled all around his chubby little legs. This might have been what woke him up and he seemed to be very unhappy about the fact, so Kurt untangled the blanket and tucked it carefully around him. Teddy was still crying, though. His diaper was dry, so Kurt tried talking to him quietly while stroking his downy hair, and then even humming a lullaby – it had always worked for Drizzle when she was a baby – but it didn't help at all.

Kurt took the baby out of the crib and held the warm bundle close to his chest, rocking him gently. Still, the wailing only grew more desperate, and the unhappiness in the little guy's voice was breaking Kurt's heart. He wanted to help, he really did – if he only knew what Teddy needed. Even living with Driz for three years hadn't made him an expert in speaking Baby. Then again, everyone said Driz was an easy kid.

Maybe Teddy was hungry? It wasn't his usual time to eat yet, but Alice said he sometimes woke up for milk early, so it was worth a try. Kurt didn't have the heart to leave the baby in his crib while he prepared the milk, and the living room lights were dimmed enough not to bother the sleepy little eyes, so he took Teddy there, praying for the girls to sleep through the noise. Twin three-year-olds on top of a fussy baby would be overkill.

"Could you hold him for a moment? I don't know what's bothering him, so I'm just going to make him some milk and see if it helps."

Blaine was by his side in an instant, and Kurt gently placed Teddy in the cradle of his husband's arms, trying not to let the ache in his chest show. Oh, how he'd want – No, this was not the time to get maudlin, he needed to prepare the milk for the little mouth that... huh, wasn't so open or loud anymore.

Teddy seemed to forget to cry the moment Blaine held him. He was looking up at him with huge, round eyes, clearly intrigued. It might have been Blaine's black hair since both Julian and Alice were blondes, or maybe the beard Blaine was experimenting with lately, but something in Kurt's husband clearly had the little one fascinated.

The feeling was mutual, it seemed. Blaine walked to the couch and sat back down, smiling softly and never taking his eyes off the little face. Once he was safely seated, he moved the baby so that it was settled snuggly between his chest and one of his arms, and reached the other hand to touch the tiny fist with his forefinger.

Teddy caught the finger and gurgled happily. Kurt melted where he stood.

He forgot about the milk and just stayed there, leaning against the kitchen doorway and watching Blaine talk to the boy. His husband was using actual, normal words, thank god – Kurt was never a fan of babbling nonsense at babies – and quietly speaking about the fact that it was night and therefore dark and time to sleep, about the nice cuddly blanket Teddy had just caught in his little fist, about the fuzzy bunnies on his sleepsuit and about Uncle Kurt who looked like he was about to turn into a puddle of adorable–

Wait, what?

Kurt snapped out of the reverie. He stuck his tongue out at Blaine, who laughed quietly, and sat by his husband's side, trying not to grin too obviously.

Teddy was asleep.

Blaine insisted they should wait a moment longer before taking him back to his crib, so they sat there, watching whatever it was they were watching. Except Kurt didn't see a second of it. He was trying to be subtle as he kept glancing at the heartbreakingly adorable picture by his side, but he wasn't fooling himself. He was probably completely obvious, judging by the way the corner of his husband's mouth twitched every now and then.

Finally, Blaine turned to him, catching him mid-glance, and smiled softly, all the love reflected in his eyes.

"One day, baby." He said simply.

Clothes shopping for an elementary school teacher was boring. With no room for extravagance and individual flair, where was the fun? Kurt sighed deeply, for at least the twentieth time in the half hour they'd been in the store. He was bored. Bored, bored, bored. And Blaine had disappeared somewhere among the racks, probably lured by the call of yet another boring sweater vest, so Kurt had no one to whine to.

Of course, he was glad Blaine had found a job he enjoyed right after graduation – it turned out he loved teaching music, especially to young kids, and three months into the school year he still hadn't complained once. He had an additional outlet for his creativity in writing music for an off-Broadway theater group (and a potential future career, Kurt believed, because damn he was good), but most of his heart – and fashion choices, apparently – went into teaching.

Kurt sighed yet again, glaring at the miles of nearly identical, boring shirts, and briefly contemplated finding a salesperson to annoy, when he finally caught sight of his husband's broad shoulders. He made his way towards Blaine, meandering among the stacks of clothes and some dreadful mannequins, but stopped dead when he realized where he was..

Blaine was standing in the baby clothes section, clearly mesmerized. He must have noticed Kurt approaching in his peripheral vision, because he turned to face him, with his best puppy-eyed expression already on full force. He raised his hand to show what he held: on the small hanger was a tiny, pale blue onesie with a simple print: i <3 my daddies.

Kurt got choked up immediately.

"Kurrrt? Can we get it?"

Kurt just nodded, focused on controlling his breathing, and turned to walk towards the registers, feeling more than hearing Blaine follow him with the rest of their purchases. He needed to get out of here, and fast. They were supposed to go to dinner after they finished shopping, but Kurt wouldn't be able to swallow a bite now anyway. He waited for Blaine to pay, not missing the salesgirl's smile as she packed the onesie, and led the way directly to the car.

The drive home was short and quiet, but the moment they found themselves in their kitchen, Kurt turned to face his husband, his heart lodged somewhere in his throat.

"Okay, spill. What's with the onesie, Bee?"

"Well it's adorable." Blaine answered with an innocent expression, but Kurt had known his husband way too long to fall for this trick. There was more to it.

"And?"

"And it would look so cute on a baby, don't you think?" He paused and smiled before whispering softly, with awe. "On our baby."

Kurt inhaled sharply, but managed to keep his voice steady and sweet.

"We don't have a baby, honey."

Blaine reached to take his hand, intertwining their fingers, and pulled Kurt closer.

"Maybe it would be a good moment to think about one?" He asked quietly.

"Because of the onesie?" Kurt's lips were trembling now and there was no way to stop it.

"No. Because we're ready." Blaine's eyes, golden and huge and so earnest, never left Kurt's.

"Are we?"

"We are."

"But –" There were so many questions Kurt wanted to ask; it was just so sudden. He didn't even know where to start. Blaine frowned a little, concerned.

"Wait, we are, right? It's not just me?"

All the questions could wait.

"Yes, Bee, we so are."

Over the next few months, a lot of things happened.

They decided that neither of them really cared about their child being genetically theirs, so adoption would be the best way to go. Once that was established, the whole process kick-started: there were appointments at the adoption agency, paperwork, background checks and a home study, more paperwork, and finally in March they were put on a waiting list. They were told that the wait could take quite a bit because they wanted a newborn. Apparently, most people did.

Then there was nothing much to do but wait. Well, that and find a new, bigger apartment. They would need more space once the baby was there, and since they could afford steeper rent now, new options and neighborhoods were open for them.

The real estate deities must have been in favorable moods because two weeks from the day they decided to look for a new place, they were already in it, and deep in the process of redecorating. By the end of April they had their new apartment bright and ready, and loved it. They might have also christened it thoroughly by having sex on most of the available surfaces. (Except for the nursery. That felt vaguely creepy somehow.)

One day at the beginning of May Blaine came home quietly excited.

"You know, I've been talking to Eve today." He said over dinner. Seeing Kurt's blank expression, he clarified. "She's a substitute, kind of a friend. She mostly works at the high school level, but sometimes she does a few weeks with us. Anyway, she told me there's a girl at her last school that we might want to talk to."

"How so?"

"Her name's Betty. She's six months pregnant. A senior, a straight A student and kind of a computer geek from what I heard. Eve says she's looking into the possibility of a direct adoption, so..."

Kurt felt his heart beat faster, but he knew too much about teen pregnancies to let himself hope just yet.

"What about the father?"

"Unknown. An undetermined college kid at her one and only frat party, apparently. Her parents support her, but they also think giving the baby up would be best for everyone. I thought we could at least talk to her."

So they did.

It wasn't like the movies – mutual trust at first sight and adoption papers ready to sign the next day. Betty had never considered giving her baby girl up to a gay couple, but she was tolerant and open-minded, so it wasn't much of a problem. She liked them enough after the first talk in a coffeeshop with her parents present that she decided to meet with them a few times more before she made up her mind.

She quickly got to the point of adoring Blaine, whom she treated more like a friend than an adult. She swooned over the story of their love. She openly appreciated Kurt's wit and was impressed by his career, and on their third meeting, when he told her about Drizzle and Quinn's story, she started to look at him with barely concealed awe.

"Wait, and your brother really brought Drizzle up alone? At sixteen?"

"Well, he wasn't alone. We were all there to help and support him, and our parents are both pretty awesome. Driz might have had a somewhat unusual childhood, but she's always been loved and has never felt like she wasn't wanted, and that's what counts, I think. Finn got married when she was six, so she has a proper mom now, and Quinn keeps in a loose kind of contact with her too. Everyone had some tough choices to make back then, but Drizzle's happiness was a priority."

Betty sat silent for a long moment before asking quietly.

"If... if you adopt her, can I see her one day? Or, I don't know, get a picture, and learn how she is? Not like a mom, just... I think I'd like to know that she's happy."

Blaine was already nodding when Kurt answered.

"Of course. We could work on open adoption, if you want. Our baby will know all along that he or she was adopted, obviously."

She nodded and took a deep breath before smiling at them, eyes a little teary.

"Okay."

"Really?" Kurt could barely breathe. He hadn't let himself hope too much, afraid of the heartbreak if he had, and now the joy was like a flood threatening to drown him.

"Really. I want Lily to be loved. You are good people and I've never seen adults so in love before. I know she'll be happy with you."

"Lily?" Blaine asked, his voice slightly breaking with emotion, too.

"Oh, that's just what I've been calling her to myself." Betty blushed and stroked her belly. "It doesn't mean you have to keep the name."

"No," Kurt breathed. "I like it. Lily."

Blaine grinned and nodded, before bouncing uncontrollably. "Can I please please please touch your belly now?"

Betty giggled and nodded, and as Blaine laid his palm carefully on the swell of her stomach, she took Kurt's hand, too, and put it next to his husband's. Then she spoke quietly.

"Hey Lily, these are your new dads. See how lucky you are? You'll have two dads who will love you and take care of you, and – oh!"

Little Lily decided to welcome her new dads with a solid kick.

***

Sebastian hated hospitals. Fortunately, the room was the least hospital-like a room in a hospital could be. In fact, it almost looked like a small conference room.

They came too early, the four of them (it would be five, but Melissa got a cold and didn't want to share). Kurt was pacing so much the room felt claustrophobic, so Cooper took him out – theoretically for coffee, although Sebastian hoped that he'd think better of it and get him chamomile tea instead, or something else with a calming effect.

Xanax, maybe.

He stretched his legs and looked  at Blaine sitting beside him, completely motionless, his face blank.

"At least you’re taking it like a pro."

This seemed to be a cue for Blaine to freak out. Oh, fantastic. Where were all the  nurses with their drugs when you need them? It was supposed to be a hospital, dammit.

"Do you think it's too late to reconsider?" Blaine's face was pale and tense, his hands clenched into fists on his lap.

Sebastian did his best, but he was no expert in comforting and soothing.

"I'd say definitely too late, considering she's already out in this cruel world and you've signed the adoption papers. You don't want to bail on your child on the very first day, do you?"

Blaine groaned and covered his face with his hands.

Oh, great, Smythe, just the thing to say. He tried once more.

"No, hey, it's gonna be fine. Why the cold feet anyway? Did you just realize you're giving up the last of your freedom? Don't worry, I heard it gets easier in a few years. Well, eighteen in the worst case, when you can kick them out to college. You'll be still young then."

Blaine shook his head and looked up at Sebastian, his face anxious.

"What if I screw up? What if I'm a terrible dad? There's no rehearsal for this, and the books can only tell you so much, and what if I turn out like my father? No one's ever showed me how to be a good dad, how am I–"

"Hey." The kid was really working himself up to a panic attack. Sebastian touched his knee. "What about Burt? You look up to him, don't you? We all do."

Blaine seemed to breathe a little easier.

"I guess, but–"

"And you're talking like you're alone for the ride. You've got Kurt, remember? You're together in this, and this is what you both want, right? Having a family."

Blaine nodded shakily.

"And when it gets hard, since I'm sure it will sometimes, you two have other people who care. Cooper and Mel, Kurt's family, Julian and the clan. Me, even, though I don't know anything about kids and I intend to keep it that way. But I'm good for drinking and unloading whenever you need it."

Blaine looked better, not so green anymore, and Sebastian gave himself a virtual pat on the back.

"You'll be fine, kid. You won't be a perfect dad because there's no such thing, but you're giving this little girl a loving home and a family who wants her. That's a good start, I'd say."

"Thanks, Seb."

"Don't mention it." He briefly wondered if Cooper was  giving Kurt a similar (well, probably better) pep talk somewhere outside.

Just then the door opened and the other two walked in, followed by a plump, motherly-looking nurse wheeling a plastic bassinet in front of her. A quiet mewling sound was coming from the little bundle in it.

"Alright, here we are." The nurse declared with a smile. "Everything's in order, you can take your little girl home now."

Sebastian discreetly took out his iPhone and pressed record.

She scooped up the kid (and wow, that was one tiny baby) looking between Kurt and Blaine. Neither of them paid any attention to the rest of the world anymore, all nerves gone from their faces, nothing but happy anticipation left. Kurt reached out and the nurse carefully placed the bundle in his arms. Blaine joined them, embracing both his husband and their new baby daughter.

The mewling stopped.

The nurse grinned and took some kind of a form from her pocket. "So what's her name, for the record?"

"Lily Elizabeth Hummel." Blaine answered, and Kurt smiled.

"Hi, Lily." He whispered. "Welcome to the world."

Sebastian rubbed at his suddenly stinging eyes. Damn air-conditioning.

THE END