CHAPTER 9

They spent the evening watching a movie, cuddled up together on the couch, but for the last hour Kurt was visibly tense and anxious; he kept glancing at the clock every five minutes until finally Blaine paused the DVD.

“Kurt, is something bothering you?”

“No, but… It’s almost ten and we still haven’t, you know…”

Blaine frowned.

“Actually, I don’t.”

Kurt blushed deeply, but pushed through.

“We still haven’t had sex. Um… anal sex, I mean. And the 24 hours are almost over.”

Oh. So Kurt still thought he would press him? Blaine smiled and stroke his husband’s pink cheek.

“That’s because we’re not doing it.” Kurt’s eyebrows nearly met his hairline. “Why are you surprised? You said you don’t want to and I respect that.”

“But… the consummation? I’m not going to let anyone take you away from me, Blaine.”

Warmth spread in Blaine’s chest, the wonderful fuzzy feeling of being wanted, being loved like a fluffy blanket around his heart. He smiled and kissed Kurt softly.

“There is a very slight chance that we get a judge who considers anal sex as required for consummation, and if we do, we have a right to appeal. We’ll be fine. Don’t worry about it. Everything we did was amazing and I’m grateful for the trust you put in me; we don’t have to go any further than you’re comfortable with.”

Kurt nodded, accepting, but the frown on his face didn’t disappear. He sat there, biting his lip, as if fighting with himself. What about, though?

“Kurt?” He mumbled something in response, barely audible, and Blaine shook his head, a bit concerned now. “Hey, tell me. What’s on your mind?”

Kurt took a deep breath, as if deciding something, and looked him in the eyes at last. His voice trembled a little when he spoke.

“I think… I want to try it anyway. I mean, if you’re still interested in um…,” it broke a little at the end, coming out as barely a whisper, “bottoming.”

Blaine inhaled sharply, afraid he misheard.

“Wait. You want to try…”

“To make love to you, yes.” Kurt sounded braver now. “If you want to.”

“I do.” Blaine’s answer was immediate; he had no doubts about it. “But are you sure?”

“Yes. Are you?”

“I am. Definitely.” But Blaine’s hands shook already and he knew that Kurt must have noticed. “I just… didn’t expect this and… Give me a minute?”

Kurt cuddled closer and Blaine sank into his arms, his body relaxing again even before he heard his husband whisper into his ear.

“I will stop immediately if you tell me to. And I’ll go slow and gentle, just like I’ve read in your book. But please, don’t feel pressured, okay? I would never push you to do anything you don’t want.”

Excitement was already taking place of anxiety in Blaine’s mind though, and he smiled easily as he answered.

“No, I really want this. Come on. Ready?”

“Ready.”

Holding hands, they went to their bedroom again, to make the last big step into intimacy.

Before Blaine knew it, everything was ready – dimmed lights and soft, quiet music in the background, washcloths in a bowl of warm water and wipes by the bed, condoms and lubricant on the nightstand. And Kurt. Beautiful, blushing Kurt, with awe and pure love in his eyes as he undressed Blaine unhurriedly, kissing every inch of newly exposed skin. Once there was not a stitch of fabric left between his fingertips and Blaine’s warm skin, he slipped off his own clothes and they lay down, close enough to be breathing each other in. Their bodies were touching everywhere they could – their legs tangled, hips and chests pressed together, their fingers intertwined and lips sharing deep, languid kisses.

They worked together seamlessly without a single word, their minds and bodies in perfect harmony. Acting and reacting, giving and taking – it was balanced and surprisingly easy, and still, Blaine could hardly believe it was happening. He’d accepted they wouldn’t do this, and yet here he was, Kurt’s gentle fingers and hot lips all over him, his whispered words of love and praise almost worshipping.

Kurt couldn’t possibly be more attentive and careful as he finally stopped just teasing Blaine’s entrance with his slickened fingertips and slid the first finger in, slow and deep, with hardly any resistance. They both gasped. Blaine had tried to finger himself, once; but the angle had been uncomfortable and it had just felt strange. Now though, with Kurt, it was completely different – exciting and arousing, and not at all weird. Kurt took his time before adding the second finger and with the wiggling and stretching, things suddenly became much more intense. Blaine got to the point of keening and begging before his husband even pushed the third finger in, the stretch – though initially mildly uncomfortable – just adding to the hot waves of pleasure coursing through his veins and then…

The alarm in Blaine’s phone went off.

Kurt looked at him incredulously before reaching with his free hand to turn it off; the fingers of the other one still deep in Blaine’s ass, but their blood-boiling movement paused. It took Blaine a minute to activate enough brain cells to remember what it was all about and when he did, a beat of anxiety shot through him.

“It was the signal that the 24 hours are over. So… do you want to stop?”

Kurt looked at him as if he’d suddenly grown a nice set of tentacles.

“You are kidding, I hope? Do you want me to stop?” With this, he moved his fingers again – out slow and back in again, deep, even deeper, dragging a fingertip right over that one perfect spot – and Blaine saw stars.

“Fuck, no. Please, please don’t stop; never ever stop, this is fucking divine, Kurt- oh…”

Suddenly, the wonderful sensation was gone and the loss was almost painful, the need to be filled again overwhelming. Blaine opened his eyes to look at Kurt and beg, only to see him focused on putting the condom on and damn, that shouldn’t be so hot, should it? It was, though, both in the beauty of Kurt, gorgeously naked and flushed, with mussed hair, even more sexy than ever, and in the anticipation of what would come in just a moment. Blaine’s breath caught in his throat.

Kurt crawled up to kiss him softly, their bodies pressing together again.

“Still sure?”

“Absolutely.”

“Okay. Promise to tell me if you want me to stop or pause, or slow down – anything.”

“I will, I promise. I love you.”

“I love you too.”

And with that, Kurt was kneeling back, pushing Blaine’s knees up and aligning his cock with the entrance. Blaine’s heart was pounding hard and fast; this was it. Kurt didn’t push in though, not yet. He leaned over Blaine with his hands on the bed on either side of his head, and looked him seriously in the eyes, his own dark and wide. It was hard to believe the change in Kurt – he looked so in control now, calm and certain, as if deciding to do this and educating himself was enough to leave any hesitation and fear behind the bedroom’s door. His voice was soft when he spoke.

“Love, I will try my best not to hurt you, but if I will, even a little bit, I want you to bite on my forearm, just as hard.” Blaine started to protest – it was crazy, really, but Kurt interrupted him. “Please, Blaine, just do that. Pain for pain, if there is any. Please, I know it’s weird, but I need this, okay?”

Blaine could do nothing but nod, and Kurt moved. Ever so slow and gentle, he pushed in, against the resistance of the tight ring of muscles.

It felt like so much more than fingers; the building stretch grew intense and oh fuck, that hurt. Not overwhelmingly so, not enough to want to stop, but bad enough that Blaine squeezed his eyes shut and turned his head, finding Kurt’s forearm right there and biting on it, hard, trying to keep his body relaxed in spite of the instinct to tense his muscles and pull away.

Kurt didn’t withdraw his arm, didn’t budge. As soon as just the head of his cock was inside, he froze to let Blaine’s body adjust to the intrusion. The short pain quickly lessened to an ache, and then mere discomfort, and Blaine let go of Kurt’s forearm, feeling immediately guilty when he saw the deep purple indentations, not breaking skin, but sure to leave a bruise. Kurt caught his eye though and smiled.

“It’s fine. How are you?”

“Good. You can move.”

Kurt started with tiny, gentle thrusts that got him gradually deeper without causing anything more than a stretching, filling sensation, and before long he was fully in, breathing fast and shallow. Blaine moaned. Now that the first shock passed, all he felt was full – wonderfully so, and aching for Kurt to move. When he twitched his hips a little though, his husband shook his head, his eyes desperate as he spoke through clenched teeth.

“No! Don’t, or it will be over right now. Fuck, you’re so tight… It’s so intense, just…”

He lowered himself into a kiss and Blaine wound his legs around his waist. Doing so changed the angle between them somehow and pushed Kurt’s cock impossibly deeper, hitting just the right spot, and Blaine arched, groaning as pleasure drowned him for a moment, the feeling of full making it even more intense. Kurt whimpered.

“Fuck, I can’t…”

The drag inside as Kurt pulled out almost entirely and then pushed back in was like nothing Blaine had ever felt, but oh, so good. Above him, Kurt whined and pressed his lips back to Blaine’s, the kiss hungry and desperate. Blaine’s cock got trapped between them, friction from Kurt’s every move rough and perfect, and the world was already disappearing in a whirlwind of sensations.  Several thrusts later nothing else was important but the feelings of touching, dragging, tingling; the sounds of their delight mixing in the air and disappearing, muffled between their lips and tongues, and Kurt was right, it wouldn’t last long at all. One more hard, deep thrust, Kurt’s movements already chaotic, and Blaine couldn’t hold on any more.

The orgasm, so intense it was on the verge of painful, ripped a rough cry out of his mouth and suddenly everything was multiplied, every sensation more intense, more real – the slide of his come between their bodies, the clenching of his hole over the thick, solid shaft inside, the buzzing in his ears and burning in his blood. Finally, the pulsing of Kurt’s cock inside him as he came, his face shocked and frozen, mouth curved over Blaine’s name.

Kurt pulled out and away after much too short a moment and Blaine was left feeling empty and incomplete. After being together like this, the closest they could be, every inch of distance between them felt like too much. Kurt seemed to feel the same, though – he cleaned them both swiftly with a warm soft cloth, just enough to wipe off come and lube, and then returned into Blaine’s waiting arms. They cuddled into each other, as close as possible, skin touching skin everywhere, seeking for more, for closer. Finally, they settled for a complicated tangle, close enough to satisfy the worst of need to melt together.

Blaine wanted to ask any and all of the cliché questions. Was it good? Did Kurt like it? Would he ever want to do it again? But he stayed silent, partly out of fear that the answers would be not what he wanted so desperately to hear. It was a relief then when Kurt murmured into the skin of his chest.

“Was it at least half as good for you as it was for me?”

Blaine smiled into Kurt’s disheveled hair.

“So  good.” After a beat of hesitation, he dared to ask. “Does it mean we’ll be doing it again?”

“If you said we wouldn’t, you would break my heart a little right now. God, Blaine, what have you done to me? I went into this marriage feeling like a total prude and now I can’t get enough.” His soft laugh tickled Blaine’s chest before he pressed a soft kiss there. “And I love it. I love you.”

Sleepiness already shutting his brain off, Blaine managed to mumble “I love you too” before he was dead to the world.