CHAPTER 5

For Blaine, performing had always been as natural as breathing. He felt more at home on stage – or in any place that served as one – than he did in his actual home. Which is why it made no sense that he felt so out of sorts now. The Warblers were already strategically placed all over the GAP store, just waiting for Blaine's signal to begin the performance. Jeremiah was there, ready to be wooed, even if he didn't know it yet. Their song choice was great and their harmonies arranged perfectly.

And still something didn't feel right.

It couldn't be stage fright – Blaine didn't get stage fright – and yet, ever since he'd presented his request to the Warblers two days ago, a vague discomfort had been gnawing at his brain, and he still couldn't pinpoint the reason. It was stronger than ever now, almost buzzing along his nerve paths as he was standing to the side of the store with Kurt, rambling about Jeremiah to distract himself and waiting for the perfect moment to start the performance.

Or maybe it was just Kurt's closeness affecting him again, but suddenly, he had doubts – a world of doubts.

"This is insane, I don't know what I'm doing. We haven't even really gone out on a date, we shouldn't do this."

Even through the layers of clothing, Kurt's touch was still a shock and a spark as he took Blaine by the shoulders and pushed him firmly towards the center of the store.

"Okay, come on, man up. You're amazing. He's gonna love you."

And just like that, the discomfort was gone and Blaine took a deep breath to center himself before stepping out front.

Once he started, it was fantastic. The rush of performing hot and bright in his veins, he was singing his heart out and everyone clearly loved it – the customers, the staff, his fellow Warblers. Jeremiah seemed shocked at first – and okay, the song choice might have been a bit bold, but Blaine wanted to state his readiness loud and clear – but it only took him a moment to start smiling too, even as he was flitting around the store, pretending to be busy.

Oh, Blaine was so getting a date after this.

The first wave of discomfort hit him fast and hard not even halfway through the song, and he almost stuttered on the confident promise of the lyrics, his show face falling for a second before he got himself together. It was the same unsettling feeling from before, only much stronger, like a physical blow, and Blaine felt... upset? But how, why, no he didn't! He felt wonderful, singing to a hot guy he was falling in love with, and everything was going beautifully, so why would he be upset?

Not that it mattered, really – Blaine was a natural born performer. He wouldn't let some weird emotional glitch affect his show, and the feeling faded almost instantly, anyway.

Only to return, even stronger, just as he got to his favorite line, the one about toys. This time it didn't let go and he stumbled on the stand he'd just jumped on.

It's wrong. So wrong.

What was it, dammit?

He powered through, but it was getting harder by the second, his focus unraveling, his brain screaming at him to pay attention – but to what? It took every last bit of effort to remember the words and keep his dance moves even vaguely consistent, but he would manage, he would finish the song, he would –

He didn't. The pounding emotion was too loud in his head, drowning out everything else, and Blaine heard himself slide off-key, a jarring sound and then silence, filled only with the fading harmonies of the other Warblers and their concerned whispers.

It was unlike him. He never broke off in the middle of a song, not even during rehearsals, ever. And now he was standing silent in the middle of the store full of his friends and curious strangers, in front of the guy he was trying to woo. And he didn't care. Only the pull of the distress call in his mind mattered right then, and once he stopped fighting it, the instinct only took seconds to kick in. He whirled around without a conscious decision, in a panic-induced search, until he found him.

Leaning against a mannequin, Kurt looked broken, crushed – and then only stunned as he quickly got his face under control again. Blaine was by his side in two quick strides.

"Are you alright?" The urge to reach, to hold, was almost unbearable, his hands feeling empty and his nerves achingly raw.

Kurt arched an eyebrow, his eyes wide. "Of course I am. What happened?"

"What happened?" he repeated dumbly, his eyes raking over Kurt's tense form to make sure he was safe and sound.

"Blaine? You stopped the performance."

"I... what? Oh, I did. Are you sure you're okay? You looked upset." The feeling was fading away already, from the crushing, all-consuming waves to a barely-there buzzing, but his brain was still frozen, shocked with it.

Kurt looked around, confounded, before grabbing Blaine's sleeve and pulling him away and out of the store. "I'm fine. Come on, I think they've called security. Let's talk outside."

"But Kurt –"

"Outside, Blaine." It was gentle, but firm, and Blaine had no choice but to follow.

It took awhile to grab their coats from Kurt's car and dodge the group of confused Warblers – Kurt had some sort of wordless conversation with Wes in passing, one that involved eyebrows, headshakes and nods, which seemed to be enough to avoid questions for now – and by the time they found an unoccupied bench opposite the store, Blaine's rock-solid conviction that he had somehow channeled Kurt's state of mind had wavered and died. The urgency to find out what was wrong and help somehow had disappeared with the strange wave of emotions. While Blaine was still certain it had something to do with his mark, a new sort of connection that he'd have to investigate at some point, there were other things quickly taking priority in his mind now.

He'd just sung a highly sexualized song in the middle of a GAP store to a guy he was trying to impress, in front of a crowd of staff and shoppers.

Had they really called for security? Would he be banned from shopping at the GAP now?

In light of all this, the fact that he'd freaked out in the middle of the performance for no apparent reason seemed trivial indeed.

***

Kurt had no idea what had just happened.

Of course, he was infinitely grateful that the heart-crushing torture of watching Blaine serenade another guy was over. He'd thought he was ready, and had been mentally preparing for this all morning because this was what friends did, right? They supported each other, no matter what. And Blaine, regardless of Kurt's feelings for him, was first and foremost his best friend.

And he'd been doing fine at first – encouraging Blaine when he'd gotten cold feet, singing the stupid creepy song along with the other Warblers like he was supposed to. But at some point it had gotten to be too much. It turned out it was one thing to practice the number at Dalton and mentally steel himself, and quite another to actually see the way Blaine's face lit up when he sang directly to Jeremiah. To see how eager and enthusiastic he was to put his hands on the guy given half a chance, while he'd been pretty much freaking out whenever he'd touched Kurt fleetingly in the last month and a half. It was just... too much.

– when I get you alone –

– you can keep your toys in the drawer tonight –

– I want you so bad –

It was all Kurt could do not to run out of the store to hide in his car and cry. Or scream. Or both.

And then it stopped. Just like that, like flipping a switch. As if the universe noticed Kurt's plight and took pity on him.

And now he was sitting confused in front of the GAP with Blaine, who had just gone from frantic and weirdly protective for no reason to freaking out about the performance. And thank god for the change of tune, because Kurt had almost spilt that yes, he was upset, and wasn't it obvious why? Instead, he just sat there, trying to hold on to the supportive best friend attitude (even though duh, Blaine, of course it was too much) and not overanalyze Blaine's unusual behavior or question him about it.

Jeremiah came out out of the store ten minutes later, clearly annoyed, and Blaine bounced to his feet like a puppy. He was given no chance to speak, though.

"What the hell were you doing? You can't just bust a groove in the middle of someone else's workplace!"

"But –"

"No. I almost got fired. I managed to convince my boss it was just some sort of high school prank or a dare, but they're going to watch me like a hawk now." Even with Blaine's back to him, Kurt could feel his distress. He could definitely see it in the way his shoulders slumped. Jeremiah's face softened. "Blaine, let's just be clear here. You and I got coffee twice, we're not dating. If we were, I'd get arrested 'cause you're underage."

"But I'm–"

Jeremiah was already shaking his head and turning away to go back to the store, and the look on Blaine's face when he turned held such a painful mix of embarrassment and devastation that Kurt could almost feel the emotions himself.

But at least it took him away from his own headspace as he scrambled for something to say, some comfort to offer. Then he found it.

"You know what? I think I have a perfect thing for us to do on Valentine's Day. A non-couple thing," he rushed to add. "In fact, I think we need to convince all of the Warblers. Come on."

His McKinley friends were just the right brand of crazy to soothe a broken heart.