My exboyfriend's friend - untold stories
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anwilu

Aug. 10, 2013, 4:09 a.m.


My exboyfriend's friend - untold stories

My exboyfriend's friend - untold stories: I want to have a baby part one


E - Words: 3,435 - Last Updated: Aug 10, 2013
Story: Closed - Chapters: 6/? - Created: Dec 19, 2012 - Updated: Aug 10, 2013
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Author's Notes: I have a prompt to write about the adoption process and I honestly didn't think it'd be so hard. =) Here is the first part of it. The second part is in progress now but I have no idea when it'll be finished. Enjoy.

Blaine knew something was wrong. Kurt had been awfully quiet lately. He seemed to be deep in his thoughts all the time and Blaine was patiently waiting for him to finally say what was bothering him but Kurt's problems remained uncovered.

They were sitting by the table, eating dinner without a single word once again. Kurt didn't talk if he wasn't spoken to and Blaine was tired of always being the one starting the conversation. The situation had been going on for almost two weeks now. Blaine considered it ridiculous but didn't want to push Kurt into something he wasn't ready for.

Kurt took a breath as he was going to say something but then he just put another bite of food into his mouth and continued eating in silence. The fifth time it happened Blaine lost his cool.

"God, Kurt! Just say it! What's wrong?!" Kurt - clearly surprised that Blaine had snapped at him - put his cutlery down and moved his plate away from him.

"I probably made a mistake when I left my job and started my own business…"

"What?!"

"I don't have regular income…"

"Kurt, we have enough money for living even if you didn't have any income. I have no idea what you are talking about. We have our savings…"

"I want to have a baby." Blaine was lost. He tried to proceed how they got from a discussion about income to a sentence with a word baby in it.

"A baby?"

"We've been married for two years now. Maybe it's time to start a family. The adoption process is long. It can take several years…The regular income can help us…I mean…" Kurt stood up and came to Blaine.

"I'm ready to become a father. And it's okay if you're not. I just want you to know that I'm ready and that we can fill the adoption papers whenever you want to." Blaine pulled Kurt onto his lap.

"You were acting weird because of this?" He asked softly and stroked Kurt's cheek with his thumb.

"Yeah…I was thinking about it 24/7."

"Why didn't you tell me?"

"I didn't know how…I was waiting for the right time…"

"Well, let's finish dinner and then we can talk about it, okay?"


Kurt didn't like the social worker who was assigned to them. After the first meeting with him he knew something was wrong with the guy. He just couldn't tell what. Blaine hadn't said anything so Kurt let it be for a while but after three months of ridiculous requirements he finally brought the topic up.

"I think he hates us." Kurt told his husband when Mr. Brown left their apartment.

"He doesn't."

"Come on, Blaine! We gave him everything he asked for. He has every single piece of information he needs, some of them several times since he keeps asking the same questions and making impromptu visits every other week to see if our apartment is suitable for a child to live in. He never smiles at us; he seems like he is doing his best to find something wrong and give his disapproval with our adoption…It's not okay."

Blaine looked at Kurt, noticing he was really concerned and sad. It wasn't that Blaine was thrilled about Mr. Brown. Not at all! He found him strange. He just didn't think the social worker was trying to sabotage their adoption process.

"Kurt, love, come here. Sit down." Blaine held his hand for him, guiding him to sit next to him on the sofa. "He is doing his job. Yes, he is strict and serious all the time and he is always so formal around us but I guess it's just his personality. Not everybody is open and talkative. He has to make sure he gives his approval to someone who is able to take care of a child. It's a big responsibility. I know other social workers in the agency have a friendly relationship with their clients and I get that you'd like to have the same. But we are stuck with him. We need to hold on and when the home study is finished it'll be over, okay?" Kurt nodded and threw his head on Blaine's shoulder.

"I want us to have a baby so much I'm going crazy." He whispered, closing his eyes in the process so the tears of frustration wouldn't have a chance to spill down.

"Me too, baby…" They sat there in silence for a while when an idea popped up in Blaine's mind.

"Maybe we are doing it wrong."

"What?"

"For the past three months we've been living for adoption. It's literally the only topic of our conversations…and not just the conversations between us but the conversations we have with our families and friends. Maybe we are trying too hard. Maybe he is waiting for us to get loose, to relax. Maybe we are giving a wrong impression of who we are and how we are…Do you understand what I'm saying?"

"Kind of…"

"We need to go back to our life, Kurt. When was the last time we went out? We haven't seen any movie or Broadway show in ages…I'm taking you on a date tomorrow."

"What?!"

"Yeah. I'm taking my husband on a date…Somewhere. I don't have a concept yet but I'll figure something out." Kurt was smiling by this point. He loved Blaine's enthusiasm and he missed it over the last few months. It was now when he realized what Blaine was talking about. They'd been waking up and falling asleep with thoughts of a baby or Mr. Brown or home study or whatever that had something in common with adoption since their dinner talk. They thought and talked about it constantly. They simply forgot to live.


Blaine knew Kurt was right. He was mad at himself that he hadn't listened to Kurt then. It'd been more than six months since they'd started the adoption process and their home study still wasn't over. Mr. Brown continued with his strange behavior and it was getting on Blaine's nerves. Nonetheless, he had to stay strong. He had to be a rock for Kurt who was so emotional lately. He couldn't afford to be weak and let his insecurities about the situation get in his way. Kurt needed him. God, but he was so tired of everything…He wanted to break down just for a while. He wanted to get all of his frustration out but he and Kurt were practically inseparable. If he wasn't doing something work related, he was with his husband. He loved it, of course, don't get him wrong. He loved nothing more than the time he got to spend with the love of his life, yet he felt like he needed some time just for himself. Therefore, he called Rachel one day and asked her to spend it with Kurt. He told her how stressed out Kurt was and how could he use some distraction and with a bit of compunction he set the day off for himself.

Kurt was excited. The whole day was amazing. Rachel took him shopping, then they had lunch – or early dinner, because it was way too late for lunch – and saw a matinee of some Broadway show. He was in a good mood, his smile never leaving his face. He was truly happy. And he had Blaine to thank for it.

"Kurt! Kurt!" Rachel nudged his shoulder. "Are you still here with me? I said we should probably call the cab." Kurt turned his head to face her with a big grin.

"Yeah. But call two. I'm going home, Rach."

"We were supposed to have a movie night..." Rachel objected.

"I know. But I have to go home to Blaine. He was alone all day. I miss him."

"God, you're so love-struck. Usually people get tired of each other in marriage. I seriously don't know how you can still be as in love as you were at the beginning. I mean, I'm happy for you, obviously. I just don't get it."

"Everything will be clear for you once you find someone who is meant for you…"

"Well, can't wait till the day…" Rachel snorted and wrapped her arm around Kurt. There was no reason to fight for movie night. Certainly, she would have won, but Kurt would have been off and she'd rather have a proper movie watching with her best friend than the forced one.

Kurt didn't call Blaine to let him know he was on his way. He simply entered their apartment, expecting Blaine sitting in front of TV or being behind the piano. Their home was silent thought.

"Blaine? Are you home?" No response. He walked to their bedroom but Blaine was nowhere to be seen. The door to the guest room was slightly open so Kurt poked his head inside and the sight he was welcomed with was confusing. There was a box with the stuff they had got for their kid from their families and friends. They had argued about it with them, claiming they didn't want to buy anything until the child was on its way but they still ended with a teddy bear here or another stuffed animal there. They had hidden the box in the closet in the guest room so they wouldn't have to look at it and be reminded that there was no kid for them yet. Blaine was lying on the bed, his back to the door and Kurt thought he was sleeping. He walked slowly to the bed and sat down, the movement of the mattress making Blaine jump and turn around with the eyes opened widely.

"Kurt. W-What are you doing here?" He asked, hoping Kurt wouldn't pry why the box was out.

"Me? What are you doing, Blaine?" Kurt motioned to Blaine's hands that were clutching on to two little blankets. They were the first things they had bought for their child. They had seen them once while they had been shopping and loved them both so much they had had to buy them.

"Nothing." Blaine said without making eye contact, holding the blankets in his hands for dear life.

"Blaine…" The softness of Kurt's voice, the love and understanding he could hear in it, was too much and it was all it took for a first tear to fall down from his already red and puffy eyes. Kurt was next to him in no time. He securely wrapped his arms around Blaine as he was kneeling on the bed and trying his best to comfort his husband.

"Honey, what's wrong? What happened?" Blaine's face was hidden in Kurt's shoulder and it was impossible for Kurt to hear anything – not that Blaine was talking – so he readjusted himself on the bed and sat with his back to the headboard, bringing Blaine with him. He was still hugging him tightly but now Blaine was resting his head on his shoulder in a different position and his mouth was free to speak. A few heartbeats passed until Blaine said something.

"I'm sorry."

"What for? You have nothing to be sorry for as far as I'm concerned. Blaine, please tell me why are you upset…"

"It's over six months…They said it usually takes from three to six months to finish the home study. We have done everything right and…I don't know what takes him so long. He just keeps visiting us every other week with the same questions and…I memorized everything. I know exactly what he is going to ask and what he is going to see in the rooms…We are the most child proofed household in all of New York! Why hasn't he given us his approval yet? What is he waiting for?" Kurt started stroking Blaine's hair while his other arm was still firmly placed around Blaine's waist. He kissed the top of his head, thinking about the right thing to say. He'd been the one who needed comfort so many times that he'd never realized Blaine hadn't complained or broken down once.

"Why haven't you told me sooner? I was always whining and crying about it and you just kept comforting me…"

"It wouldn't help if we were both upset. My feelings weren't important in the moment. You needed me and I had to stay strong. You come first. I promised to make you happy. I couldn't watch how miserable you felt. I had to take it away. I had to make you feel better…" Kurt didn't know if it was possible but he fell in love with Blaine even more after that statement. He was so angry with himself. He didn't understand how he could be so selfish and miss Blaine's own feelings and problems.

"I promised to make you happy as well…" Blaine immediately pulled away from him.

"Kurt, you are! You are making me happy." He cupped Kurt's cheeks and blinked his eyes to get rid of the tears that were still trying to escape. "Of course, you are. You…"

"Don't you dare, Blaine." Kurt interrupted him, taking Blaine's hands down and squeezing them. "You're not finished crying. I can see it. You're not going to suppress it again. Come here." He opened his arms and Blaine snuggled to him and allowed his tears free pass.

The time had stopped for Kurt. He had no idea whether it was a few minutes or long hours of Blaine's crying and sobbing but he really didn't care. He was holding him the same way Blaine had held him when he'd needed it and he was kissing his curls and willing his own tears to stay at bay because this was about Blaine.

"I'm pathetic…" Blaine finally said when his crying ceased and sobbing was replaced by snuffling.

"You're not. You are sweet and caring, kind and loving. You're the best man alive for me, Blaine. You're my love, my best friend, my husband and my soul mate…You're…You're my everything." Blaine nuzzled Kurt's neck and Kurt could feel his smile against his skin. He kissed Blaine's temple, his cheek and jaw and when Blaine turned his head a little bit, he captured his lips. He kissed him slow and deep, caressing the inside of Blaine's mouth with his tongue tenderly. When he felt Blaine's shivering, his fingers found their way to Blaine's hair, tangling there, letting him tilt Blaine's head a little to gain a better angle and deepen the kiss even more. It was like he was trying to touch Blaine's heart and soul from the inside and the outside at the same time. It was sensual and it made them both dizzy. It was a kiss for sake of expressing closeness and affection. They didn't need anything else at the moment because it was perfect. After it'd ended they didn't go for another. They simply rested their foreheads against each other, getting their breathing to normal.

"I love you." Kurt breathed and connected their lips in a closed– mouth kiss.

"I love you." He repeated but before Blaine got a chance to respond, Kurt's lips were on his again. Kurt continued whispering the words of love and instantly kissing him all over until it was too much and Blaine couldn't take it anymore. He tucked his face in the crook of Kurt's neck, waiting for his heart to stop beating so fast and his lungs to refill the oxygen so he could finally say something. But Kurt beat him to it.

"No matter how much time it takes, we're having a child. You are going to be an amazing dad. You're incredible with kids. And I'm going to be an okay dad. I mean, I have some of Burt Hummel's genes so I couldn't turn out bad, right?" Blaine giggled and Kurt smiled.

"You are going to be a great dad, Kurt. The best one."

"Well, our kid will be a lucky one then with fathers like us."

"Yeah. We'll be one happy family."

"Promise me something." Kurt spoke softly. Blaine raised his head to look him in the eyes and nodded.

"Next time something bothers you, you'll tell me, okay? I'm aware I should have known something was up. I promise I'll stop being so caught up in my own self pity and pay more attention to you but please, whatever it is, tell me."

"I promise. I love you so much."

"What do you want us to do now, honey? Do you want to talk about it more? Or go out? Have dinner? Watch a movie? Whatever you want." Blaine lay on the bed and grabbed Kurt's wrist gently to move him down as well.

"I wanna hold you and kiss you if it's okay with you."

"It's more than okay with me, love." And Blaine closed the distance between them. Their kisses were sweet and almost chaste. They were enjoying each other, keeping it as simple making out, fingers stroking hair and cheeks, hands roaming the backs up and down but not once they got under their clothes or below their waists. During the years Kurt had spent with Blaine he'd learnt that love making wasn't just a sexual act. Sometimes they did this, lying on the bed, kissing and caressing with their clothes on and then falling asleep. Kurt felt like a teenager at times like this. And it was one of the many things he loved about Blaine. Not everybody knows how to turn back the time but Blaine managed to do that for Kurt with his innocent kisses. If doing something that makes you feel happy and loved isn't love making then what is?


Two month later their home study was yet to be completed. They were stressed out, anxious and tired. They needed a break so when Wes had invited them to his cabin for a few days, they'd accepted and couldn't wait for it.

They scheduled the whole day of their departure. They woke up and stuck to the plan – sleeping late, having brunch, packing and leaving New York soon after noon so they would arrive in the evening as the guys from Pittsburgh. Things couldn't go wrong with a plan like this. Except they could.

They didn't sleep late because there was a phone call early in the morning. Mr. Brown called he would stop by around three p.m. Blaine tried to explain they wouldn't be home but their social worker reminded him they were the ones wanting a child so he strongly recommended for them to be home. They had breakfast, packed their suitcases, watched TV, had lunch and watched TV again. Mr. Brown came at three sharp and stayed for an hour. He did his usual and left. By this point, Kurt's and Blaine's moods were ruined. They should have been on the road for hours. They knew it would be almost midnight when they got to Wes' cabin. They were about to miss the first evening with the guys.

Kurt insisted on driving although they'd agreed to switch before. Blaine was exhausted because he'd been composing the previous night and didn't get to sleep today due to Mr. Brown's craziness and love of calling them at seven a.m. The ride was long and backbreaking. Kurt excused himself as soon as they hugged their friends and exchanged a few words with them. He needed a shower.

Blaine started to be concerned an hour later because Kurt didn't come down to them. He went to check on his husband and found him soundly sleeping. He turned the light in the room off and returned to the guys in the basement.

"He fell asleep."

"He must have been spent." Lucas noted.

"He didn't let me drive…" Blaine sighed and sat down on a couch. Nick handed him a bottle of beer.

"Well…we haven't said anything so far because we were waiting for Kurt to join us but…" Nick started and after an approving nod from Lucas he continued. "We are worried about you. The adoption process is crazy and hard itself but in your case it's just ridiculous."

"I know." Blaine said, tiredness evident in his voice.

"You should talk about him with someone. Like his boss or…I don't know. What he is doing is not right. I get that he wants to make sure he won't give his permission to anybody but he is doing the exact same things for months now." Lucas joined Nick. "Your home study should have been finished weeks ago. Why do you let him treat you like that?" He wondered.

"Because he is the one who has the upper hand here. We need him to give us approval. I mean, yeah, he is doing his observations and asking the same questions all over again but beside that he's never done anything to offend us or…I don't know, guys. We want a baby so much. He knows it. Sometimes I feel like he is waiting for one of us to lose it and snap at him. So he wouldn't have to give us a yes…" None of them knew how true Blaine's words were…

End Notes: So...what do you think? Let me know. =)You can find me on twitter: VeronikaAnwilu or tumblr: nikusiatkoHope 2013 is really good for you so far. =)Nika

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