Blaine's knuckles were turning white from where he was tightly gripping the book in his hands. The line was moving too fast and too slow at the same time. He was getting closer and part of him wanted to force his way to the front while the other wanted to back away to the end of the line. He was close enough to hear Kurt's laugh and the way his voice lilted and stuttered when he was excited to express everything he was feeling all at once.

Blaine looked up to the ceiling, his jaw tightening as he scolded himself for getting teary-eyed in a public place. At a book signing of all places.

He stepped forward, catching his first glimpse of Kurt. It was the first time he had seen him in five months since the divorce had been finalized. Kurt was gesticulating with his hands and grinning, vibrant and excited, sharing this side of himself to stranger after stranger.

Blaine's brain automatically moved him forward into the place of the form previously standing before Kurt, but it took his emotions a while to catch up with the fact that he was finally at the front of the line of his ex-husband's book signing, looking and feeling quite lost.

Kurt turned to face the next person waiting in line. His smile faltered and his eyes widened. His mouth parted as he soundlessly exhaled and his palm reached to the back of his neck, trying to stop the blush that was no doubt crawling up the skin there.

Blaine tried to force a smile only for it to fall brokenly. Five years ago, he would have torn the hand away into his own and watched pink prettily paint across Kurt's cheekbones and dusted kisses anywhere he could place them and laugh and sing and—

Kurt was the first to break the silence.

“I saw your movie.”

“Oh,” Blaine murmured, not expecting that to be the first thing out of Kurts mouth. “Um, really? Thoughts?”

“I liked it,” Kurt replied slowly and articulated, nodding along with his words.

“You sound disbelieving,” Blaine teased, his stance relaxing the slightest bit.

“No, no,” Kurt waved him off, an unsure smile playing on his lips.

Blaine quirked an eyebrow.

I know you.

“Well, yes, fine, it took me off-guard that something so artistic and thought-provoking and musical was fairly well-received by the general public, but why should I be surprised? You were in it. Of course it was wonderful. You're always wonderful.”

That word. That small word was enough to make Blaine's breath catch. As soon as the words fell from Kurt's lips, he schooled his expression, but Blaine knew he had realized his mistake. They shared a quick look before Kurt immediately threw himself back into the conversation, leaning forward a bit, trying to physically fill the gap he had caused in the conversation.

“I mean, I guess what Im trying to say is, youve officially made Broadway cool to all of society. Thats what I cant believe.”

Here they were talking about him again. Blaine didnt want that at all.

“Broadway has always been cool.” He leaned into the table a little, wearing a smirk.

“Well, of course we know that,” Kurt replied, his shoulders shrugging a little as he instinctively leaned forward.

It shook Blaine a little. Their mannerisms. Their point in the conversation. It was so familiar. Comfortable even, in that moment.

“How is Burt?”

“He hasn't felt better. He and Carole got married just last month. I'm really happy for him,” Kurt mentioned, a true smile lighting up his features.

“Oh, they're so sweet. Perfect for each other, really.”

“I know,” Kurt agreed. His eyes met Blaine's and then instantly dropped, his smile following soon after.

Blaine imagined the wedding day. He wished circumstances would have been different. He wished he could have been there.

“How have you been?” He genuinely needed to know.

“Good. I...” Kurts eyes scanned over Blaines shoulder, taking in the line of people behind him. “Busy, but good.”

“Oh.” Blaine looked over his shoulder. “Oh, right, of course. Sorry. Um...”

Blaine smoothed his hand over his face. He swore he had never stammered more in his life.

“I read it. Your book. I—I read it. All of it,” Blaine told Kurt. “Its good. Well, better than good. Its... Its great, Kurt.”

Blaine was wearing that adoring look that he used to wear when Kurt would sing for him, only, now it was tainted with regret.

“Thanks,” Kurt answered, smiling sadly at Blaine.

An instant passed of silence, but Blaine knew that any instant of silence between them here would feel like an hour. He could feel the presence of the people in line behind him grow more apparent the longer their conversation spanned. He rushed to speak, anything, whatever would come out.

“I know its strange that Im here, but—”

“No. Im glad.” Kurt smiled genuinely. “Really, I am.”

Kurt looked down at the pen in his hand and was reminded of his setting. He looked up at his ex-husband then to the book in his hands.

“You… want me to sign it?”

“Oh. Of—of course.”

Kurt took the offered hardback, opening the book to the dedication page instead of just inside the cover as he had with the others. Blaine watched Kurt stare at the simple dedication printed there for a moment before scrawling a note underneath it, followed by his signature.

Kurt silently placed the book, open, in front of Blaine.

DEDICATION

for Blaine

Thank you for the last five years.

K Hummel

Blaine rapidly blinked to stop tears from forming before they could. He looked up to the ceiling and swallowed hard.

“God,” he whispered, a broken laugh hanging onto the end of the word.

This wasn't the place. He didn't want to make a scene. He didn't want to ruin Kurt's signing on top of everything else. He wanted to talk. He wanted to get to know Kurt again. Whatever was meant to follow was unknown. Whatever the outcome, he would accept. But he couldn't accept not having Kurt in his life in some way. There was too much time and too many emotions to pretend it never happened and to pretend he was okay with the idea of completely letting go.

“Ah, um,”—Blaine ran his palm over his face—“when you're through here, do you… do you want to grab some coffee?” he blurted out, needing to know if the answer would remain the same, nearly six years later.

“Sure,” Kurt replied, not missing a beat. His eyes shone with unshed tears and his voice came out soft and light. “I… I'd like that.”