June 18, 2013, 9:28 p.m.
Love Amongst the Ruins: Harder To Breathe
E - Words: 3,100 - Last Updated: Jun 18, 2013 Story: Closed - Chapters: 33/? - Created: Nov 19, 2012 - Updated: Jun 18, 2013 881 0 0 0 0
Harder To Breathe
The movie was almost over; Blaine had been given a personal concert by Kurt who had sung along with everyone of the songs. Blaine had just hummed along, after this morning he wasn't really in a mood to sing. He rolled over onto his back placing his head on the pillows and bit his lip. He reached forward for Kurt's hand hesitantly not really sure if Kurt really wanted him to hold hands with him, although Kurt seemed to not mind earlier. Blaine didn't know why but just being able to hold Kurt's hand made him feel calm and he didn't think he would ever feel that way.
Kurt noticed Blaine reaching for his hand like he was afraid, like his hand was going to bite him like one would get bit by a snake. Kurt rolled onto his side and took Blaine's hand back in his, giving him a big smile. "You can hold my hand if you want to Blaine..."
Blaine nodded at Kurt, "I just wasn't sure if you would mind or not..." Blaine sighed.
"No I don't mind in the least..." Kurt squeezed his hand.
Blaine let out a sigh. Ever since this morning after seeing the last person on the Earth he wanted to see, it felt like there was a heavy weight on his chest making it very hard to breathe. But when he was holding Kurt's hand it was like a burst of fresh air rushed through him and he could breathe easy. Blaine didn't know what this meant. He had only known Kurt for two days; he shouldn't make Blaine feel this way should he.
Kurt had been watching Blaine throughout the movie he seemed really tense but now holding his hand he seemed relaxed. "You know maybe talking about what's going on in that head of yours will make it easier to breathe." Kurt knew the feeling all too well, when you were holding something inside, that maybe shouldn't be kept a secret, made it feel like you were drowning, that your lungs didn't want to work properly.
Blaine turned his head towards Kurt, who had his brow creased together looking at Blaine. "I just really didn't ever want to see Jer..." Blaine shook his head and turned his face away from Kurt.
Kurt clutched Blaine's hand tighter. "I could tell you didn't want to see him, but Blaine you were terrified..."
"I just used to have a crush on him and now I don't ever want to see him again..." Blaine sat up but didn't let go of Kurt's hand.
"That still doesn't explain you being terrified but okay..." Kurt sat up too, once again fighting the urge to pull Blaine into his arms and hug him. "Maybe someday you'll tell me..." Kurt really wanted to know what happened to this gorgeous boy. Kurt watched Blaine's eyes widen slightly. "I would never share anything you tell me with anyone else." That seemed to get the startled look off his face and Blaine just nodded at him. "Blaine, have you ever had a boyfriend?"
Blaine shook his head and then took a deep breath, "I had a crush on Jeremiah almost all of my freshmen year...which was stupid..."
"You were too busy crushing on him that you didn't notice the other boys crushing on you..." Kurt couldn't help but snort about this.
"I guess so..." Blaine thought it was time he told Kurt more about him since Kurt had been sharing with him. "Well I came in the beginning of the year and I was really shy..." Kurt had raised his eyebrow at him. "I know I'm still shy but I was like really shy about everything, I barely had any friends at all and then one day I was in one of the music rooms just singing because I was bored and Wes and David heard me and asked me to join the Warbler's and then I suddenly had all the guys wanting to be friends with me and they gave me the solo's. I actually thought that maybe I could actually, have him (Blaine really didn't want to say Jeremiah's name anymore) be my boyfriend." Blaine looked up at Kurt; his eyes were focused on Blaine's mouth. This made him blush. "So I started hanging around more with him and his friends, which were mostly juniors and seniors, I felt like they really accepted me and he would flirt with me so I really thought that I would have a chance with him...I was wrong he didn't want a freshmen for a boyfriend." Blaine figured this was enough information for one day. "Do you want to go get some lunch?" Blaine really didn't want to leave the room again today but his stomach was growling at him.
"Yes I'm getting really hungry again." Kurt got up but never let go of Blaine's hand, he pulled him up with him. Blaine had a look of surprise on his face. "Blaine, if there is ever a time I touch you and you don't want to be touched just tell me okay?" Blaine nodded but didn't meet Kurt's eyes. "I saw how much you were bothered by the hug Sebastian gave you."
Blaine nodded again. "It's because he makes me nervous..."
They let go of each other's hands and then started down to the cafeteria. Blaine found it hard to breathe again being out of his room and not holding Kurt's hand. But he didn't want to hold Kurt's hand outside their room here, because people we jump on it and make a huge deal about it. When they got in line Blaine grabbed a chicken salad wrap sandwich, a snack size bag of salt n vinegar chips, a chocolate chip cookie and a bottle of apple juice. He watched Kurt out of the corner of his eye; he noticed that Kurt liked to eat healthy. Blaine led the way to the same table they had eaten breakfast at the other morning, none of the other Warbler's seemed to be in here right now.
"Blaine who is your best friend?" Kurt was curious.
"I think I would have to say Jeff and Nick but your..." Blaine lowered his head and blushed.
"I'm what?"
"I think you are becoming my best friend." Blaine mumbled under his breath.
"I think you are becoming my best friend too, but shush don't tell Rachel..." Kurt laughed about the last part.
"Speaking of Rachel, she asked me if you had auditioned for the Warbler's yet."
"I'm not surprised. She didn't want me too when I told her I was transferring here, but then she said she would be okay with it." Kurt was actually thinking about auditioning next week. He first wanted to find out how tough the classes here would be before he committed himself to too much. He didn't want to join and then have to drop out because the course load was too much.
"Well from what I've heard you have the voice." Blaine smiled at him.
"Thank-you..." Kurt blushed slightly.
Blaine started eating again when he felt someone pull their chair up sitting really close to him.
"Well isn't this cozy..." Sebastian stated when he was full seated in his chair. Kurt was glaring at him. "Am I interrupting something?"
"What is with you invading people's person space?" Kurt growled. If he sat any closer to Blaine they would have to be sitting on one another. Kurt noticed Blaine tried to slide his chair away from Sebastian but Sebastian had his arm on the back of the chair. "You are so annoying..." Kurt couldn't help it.
"Why Hummel that's not very nice..." Sebastian was smirking at Kurt still.
"I never said I was nice did I?" Kurt growled.
"You don't want to go there with me Hummel, see you're a lot nicer than I am." Sebastian had a slight growl in his voice now too.
Blaine was trying his hardest not to freak out, but when Sebastian seemed to want to touch him it was hard not to. He finally managed to move his chair; he slid it closer to where Kurt was sitting. "Did you want something Sebastian?" he asked once his breathing had calmed down.
Sebastian didn't have his smirk on his face anymore. He didn't understand why Blaine seemed so afraid of human contact. "Just coming to find out what you are doing tonight?"
Blaine sighed, "What do I do every weekend Sebastian?"
"Watch movies in your room..." Sebastian sighed. This meant that Kurt would be in there watching them with him. Blaine nodded at him. "So, Hummel maybe you want to come hang out with the guys tonight..."
"If it means hanging out with you, then no...not interested..." Kurt wasn't going to tell him that he planned on spending as much time with Blaine as Blaine allowed him too. Kurt watched Blaine as he finished off his bottle of apple juice. He looked so uncomfortable it was making Kurt angry at Sebastian. "You can leave now."
Sebastian didn't like this, Blaine was really the only guy here that Sebastian had any feelings for what so ever and Kurt seemed to have feelings for him to, but the difference was that Blaine seemed comfortable around Kurt and this is what bothered Sebastian the most. "I'll see you later Blaine..." Sebastian ran a hand down Blaine's arm and he flinched away from him. He sighed and then got up and left.
Kurt really felt the urge to trip Sebastian when he went by. "Are you okay?" He turned in his chair so he was facing Blaine.
"Why does he always have to touch me?"
Kurt held his hand out to Blaine he wasn't sure if he would take it while they were down here. Blaine did take his hand though. If this was the only comfort he could give Blaine right now than it would have to do. "Because, he's an ass and doesn't want to accept that it bothers you."
Sebastian knew they didn't know he was there. He was going to keep quiet and just listen to them but when he saw Blaine take Kurt's hand it was too much for him. "I maybe an ass, but I used to touch you last year Blaine the exact same way I do now and you didn't jump out of your skin then, and now you let this..." Sebastian wasn't' sure what he wanted to call Kurt. "You let him hold your hand..." Sebastian sat down and took Blaine's other hand in his own holding it firmly despite Blaine trying to pull it away. "If he can hold your hand than so can I..."
"Let go of me..." Blaine was trying his hardest to pull his hand away from Sebastian. "Let go..." Blaine had slid his chair backwards trying to get away from him but he still didn't let go. "Let go of me..." Blaine shrieked his time.
"What the hell, let go of him." Kurt was standing up now he reached over to try to pry Sebastian's hand off of Blaine's. Kurt heard footsteps rushing towards them. Blaine was practically clinging to Kurt's back now hiding from Sebastian but his arm was still stretched out and it looked painful. Sebastian was actually trying to pull Blaine back down into his chair. Kurt could hear Blaine chanting ‘get off me, get off me'. "LET GO OF HIM!" Kurt shouted, most of the students that we in the cafeteria were already staring at the scene that was going on.
"What the hell is going on?" Nick asked in a stressed tone.
"He won't let go of Blaine..." Kurt growled still staring at Sebastian.
"Sebastian what the hell..." A tall blonde boy, who was really good looking said hitting Sebastian in the arm.
Kurt had seen him a couple times but hadn't really talked to him, but he figured this was Jeff Sterling. "He just won't let go..." Kurt was still trying to pry their hands apart, which had worked slightly but Sebastian tightened his hand around Blaine's wrist this time. Kurt could feel Blaine's chest heaving against his back. He seemed like he was going to hyperventilate.
"Whoa everyone calm down..."
Kurt looked to who had just added the new addition to the situation. It was Wes with David standing right beside him. "Tell him to let go of Blaine before I put my foot up his ass..." Kurt had that growl to his voice again.
"Sebastian let go right now..." Wes said in a firm but calm voice, holding a hand up to Kurt.
David had come around the table and took a hold of Blaine's arm gently. "Sebastian you're going to hurt him."
"All I was doing was holding his hand and he freaked out, like he does all the time and then he runs away...well he can't run away all the time..." Sebastian was glaring up at David.
"This isn't funny Sebastian." Nick had come around the table so he was stand near Blaine and Kurt.
Kurt realized that none of them were trying to pull him away from Blaine because they didn't want to hurt Blaine. Kurt grabbed Sebastian's wrist, the one that was holding on to Blaine and started driving his thumb into the tendons. "Let go or I will do damage..." He watched as Sebastian's face screwed up in pain at the pressure and he released Blaine.
As soon as the pulling on his arm stopped Blaine bolted towards the door, running as fast as he could, despite the calls of his name. He ran all the way up to the dorm rooms, not bothering to stop when people would call his name as he passed them in the hall. He rounded the corner and ran right into someone almost falling to the floor, but they grabbed him and steadied him. "Don't touch me, don't touch me, don't touch me..." Blaine fought away from their grasp and didn't find any resistance.
"Whoa, Blaine it's me Thad..." Thad didn't know what was going on but this was the most freaked out he had seen Blaine in a long time. "Calm down..."
Blaine backed away from Thad staring at him. He was breathing really hard and it felt like his heart was going to pop out of his chest. He held up his hands when Thad stepped closer to him. He shook his head. He soon heard footsteps running down the hall behind him. He rushed past Thad and started to fish for his key in his pocket with shaking hands. He was just about to unlock the door when he felt warm, soft hands on his arm, he knew the touch, why was this touch so familiar in such a short time.
Kurt took the key from Blaine's trembling hand and unlocked the door. He glanced back over at Thad when Blaine disappeared into the room.
Thad came over to Kurt, "What happened?"
"Sebastian is a fucking asshole that's what happened..." Kurt knew his dad wouldn't approve of his language but he couldn't help it when he was in a bad mood he swore.
"What did he do?" Thad didn't have a shocked look on his face when Kurt said this.
Kurt told Thad about what had happened, trying to keep his temper in check. He didn't want to stay in a bad mood because he didn't want to accidently take his temper out on Blaine once he was back in the room. "Who does that...he was acting like a child..."
"Look, Kurt...Sebastian has had a thing for Blaine since they both started here and I think he is threatened by you..." Thad didn't know how Kurt would take him saying that.
"Well Blaine is scared of him." Kurt told Thad in a hushed tone, he didn't want Blaine to hear him. "And he has a good reason to feel threatened by me." Thad gave him a curious look. "I like Blaine, Thad...I don't understand it, but I've never felt like this with anyone...not so fast..."
"I think you better go comfort him, I think he needs it." Thad patted Kurt's shoulder and then walked away.
Kurt sighed and then opened the door. He quickly unlaced his boots and slid them off he wanted to be more comfortable if he was going to calm down. He bit his bottom lip when he spotted Blaine he was sitting on his bed with his back against the wall again and hugging his knees. He noticed that Blaine's wrist looked red. "Can I come and sit with you?" Kurt wanted to make sure it was okay before he did anything.
Blaine nodded at him and then watched him climb on the bed. "Thank-you..." he murmured.
Kurt bobbed his head once. "Can I see?" He reached out for Blaine's wrist. Kurt slid so he was sitting in front of Blaine cross-legged.
Blaine held his hand out to Kurt. "I'm okay...it doesn't hurt." It did hurt a little but Blaine didn't want Kurt to be any angrier than he was. Blaine closed his eyes when Kurt started rubbing his thumb over the reddened skin. "Do you want to watch another movie?" Blaine just wanted something to get his mind off everything.
"Sure, what movie do you want?" Kurt asked looking up to the shelf.
"How about Happyfeet..." Blaine suggested with a small smile at Kurt.
"I like that movie." Kurt stood up on the bed and ran his fingers over the titles until he found it. He then climbed off the bed and unplugged the television so he could move it. He tossed the pillows all onto Blaine's bed and then walked to his side of the room and slid his trunk from the end of the bed out into the space between his and Blaine's beds and then sat the television on top and then searched for a plug. As soon as he found one he plugged it in and ejected the other DVD and returned it to the shelf. "The bed is more comfy..." Kurt told Blaine when he climbed back on after starting the movie. Kurt threw his pillows against the wall and then leaned back against them.
Blaine smiled at Kurt and did the same with his pillows. Then he set back so their shoulders were touching and he took Kurt's hand back in his. Throughout the whole movie Kurt sang with the songs and Blaine smiled, he liked listening to Kurt's voice. By the time it was over Blaine felt a lot better. "Thanks for spending time with me."
"I wouldn't want to spend my time anywhere else." Kurt told him truthfully.
Blaine had to smile about this he didn't realize how lonely he was until Kurt came, sure he hung out with Nick, Jeff, Wes and David but it was different with him. Blaine was embarrassed to admit it to himself but it felt like home with Kurt and it was finally becoming easier to breathe...