Royal Pains
AlexaCardew
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Royal Pains: Chapter 11


E - Words: 5,460 - Last Updated: Dec 15, 2016
Story: Complete - Chapters: 15/15 - Created: Dec 15, 2016 - Updated: Dec 15, 2016
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Author's Notes:

Since I don't know what kind of warnings an M rated story needs, I'll warn for violence in this chapter just to be safe. Please message me if you need a summery first.

Chapter 11


“I’m so sorry Kurt, but if I have to be King, we can’t be together anymore.”


There are tears in Blaine’s eyes and it’s the only thing that keeps Kurt from throwing something at him or make a scene by yelling out his feelings. Instead, he scoops his broken heart up from the floor, forces it back into his chest and walks first out of Blains’s living room and then out of his house and out of his life. All around him, camera flashes go off, but Kurt barely notices them, just like he doesn’t notice that he’s shaking, out in the cold late February air without a coat on.


Unsurprisingly, it’s not Blaine who comes after him, but Sam, who looks like he just had to watch someone kick a puppy and torture a kitten when he hands Kurt his coat and messenger bag and begs him to come back, because surely Blaine didn’t mean it, he’s just in shock.


“He keeps muttering that he was never supposed to be King and that his father was so sure he never would be that he let his mother name him. Apparently, Blaine’s not the name for a King because it’s not regal enough.”


Kurt stops so abruptly, Sam runs right into him.


“If you think the King will change his mind, then you don’t know him very well,” he spits. “The Crown will always come first for him and no one can compete with that. As for the other thing, I don’t give a fuck, Sam. I don’t give a fuck if they’ll call him King Quasimodo or that he’s freaking out. If he’s going through this alone right now then he’s got no one to blame but himself. So go back and bow to your King, Sam, because I sure as hell won’t. If he comes to his senses he knows where to find me, and if he doesn’t tell him he’s lucky Sue made me sign that NDA.”


It’s an empty threat because he’d never go to the press with everything he knows about the Prin-, the King, because he’s not vindictive. He’s heartbroken, but not vindictive, because Blaine honestly believes he has no other choice but to end things with Kurt and live a heterosexual life from now on.


And the Sam’s arms around him, and Kurt’s sobbing into his shoulder and cursing himself for doing so, because he’s known this might happen since King Richard’s death and thought he would be prepared for it, but how can you prepare for your heart getting ripped out of your chest and your boyfriend trampling on it? He doesn’t fight Sam when he hails a cab and makes Kurt get into it before joining him even though he’s sure that Sam’s not supposed to be here and risks getting fired for abandoning Blaine. Who as new King probably requires more security not less. Not that Kurt should care about that. Because you know what they say about shoulda, coulda, woulda.


Sam gets him home and upstairs into his apartment, pushes him down onto the couch and fetches him a glass of water. It’s a testament to how much time Blaine spent at his apartment that Sam feels so at home here.


“Do you want me to call the theater?” Sam asks while Kurt gulps down the water, his throat dry from all the crying he did on the drive over from Richmond House.


“Why?” Kurt croaks and Sam frowns.


“I thought that maybe you’re not up to doing the show tonight.”


“I’m not,” Kurt admits before he straightens his spine, “but I’m not going to miss a show because of him. I’m better than that. No one pushes the Hummels around not even a King.”


+*+


Blaine’s just come out of another full blown panic attack when Sam returns.


“I should fire you on the spot,” he tells Sam who doesn't look sorry at all for just taking off. “But you did the right thing going after him. Did you get him home okay?”


“With all due respect, Your Majesty, but I don’t feel comfortable betraying Kurt’s confidence.”


It stings to be suddenly treated like dirt even by someone ranked so low in Palace hierarchy, by a commoner who’s supposed to revere him now that he’s King not despise him for ending a relationship.


“I don’t have a choice, Sam. My brother may have been nice enough to change the law for regular gay couples but I still have to obey royal law and that states clearly that the only way for me to keep my family’s line alive is to have children born to two royal parents. Do you think I want to marry a woman and have a physical relationship with her? Because the thought disgusts me,” Blaine yells in Sam’s face before he slaps his hand over his mouth and looks at his guard in horror because he’s the King, he’s not allowed to lose his temper like this; it’s unbecoming for someone in his position.


“I think it’s best if we take you to the Palace now. Sue will know how to handle this,” Puck steps in and Blaine bristles at being told what to do by a subordinate, but he doesn’t argue and follows his guards to the waiting car while the mob of reporters outside goes crazy, yelling questions at him that Blaine can’t or doesn’t want to answer.


They take the side entrance since the main gates are already blocked by hundreds of people hoping to catch a glimpse of King Blaine and Blaine’s heart is gripped by an iron fist and squeezed tightly when he sees the signs that have King Blaine & King Kurt written inside a heart, because he know this can’t and will never happen.


Sue and Emma are waiting for him when he arrives, but when they try to lead him to Cooper’s office, Blaine shakes his head and tells them he needs a fews minutes alone before he’s ready to talk.


On the way up to his room, he pulls out his phone and dials Charlotte’s number.


“I didn’t expect to hear from you again, Blaine,” Charlotte says in lieu of a greeting, and Blaine’s oddly glad that she isn’t calling him Your Majesty.


“Yeah, I’m sorry, but after how we left things I wasn’t sure you wanted to hear from me again.”


There’s a sigh on the other end of the line.


“Why are you calling? I’m sure you have more important things to deal with right now. I mean, I saw the news Blaine, holy shit. You’re King?”


“If you still want to be Queen you can have it,” Blaine blurts out because Charlotte might just be ambitious enough to take him up on the offer even after how he treated her in the past. And at least they get along, might even have become best friends if he could have been honest with her from the start.


“I’m not a virgin anymore,” Charlotte says bluntly. “You can’t believe how much fun I’ve have since you’re little video.”


“Anything Sue would object to?” Blaine asks because that would be just be his luck if the only woman he can see as his future wife disqualified herself because she slept with the wrong people after she stayed a virgin for years because of him.


“Unlike some people, I know how to be discreet,” Charlotte takes a dig at him, but he deserves everything she throws at him and doesn’t argue.


“You didn’t answer my question. Do you still want to be Queen? I’m sure we could arrange something for you after we’ve had kids so you still get to have your fun if you’re as discreet as you say you are.”


The less often he has to sleep with her the better.


“And what are you going to tell he public? You think your adoring fans will believe you’ve suddenly seen the light and are interested in girls now.”


He’s thought about it on the drive over from his home. Or what used to be his home.


“I’ll say I’m bisexual and that if I could chose I would stay with Kurt, but the Kingdom needs a King and a Queen and you’ve been gracious enough to take me back. I can have Emma write a press release right away and Sue will make sure people will admire us for our dedication to the throne instead of criticizing us for our arrangement.”


“Yeah, no. You will not say publicly that you prefer him over me. No. You broke up with him because you realized that I’m the better choice for a King and you were lucky that I still had feelings for you.”


“Do you? Still have feelings for me?” Blaine asks as he sinks down onto his bed and traces his finger over his name on a letter left for him in his room. It’s not hard to guess who it’s from.


“Jesus, Blaine. We were together five years and officially engaged for two months. I thought we would be married by now, so what do you think? That I was your girlfriend just so I could marry into your family? If I really were as power hungry as you seem to think I am, I would have broken up with you years ago and gone after Cooper. How was I supposed to know that you would be King one day. If anyone’s actually bet on it, they must have won a lot of money today.”


There isn’t much he can say after this because he honestly believed that Charlotte saw him as nothing more than a means to an end and would have challenged anyone who said they’re in love. Because it never was love, at least not for him.


“I’m really sorry, Charlotte,” he tells her again. “I should have ended it with you the moment my dad sent me off to South Africa. I was selfish because I knew he’d leave me alone as long as you were my girlfriend.”


It’s Charlotte’s turn to be quiet for a moment. Then her voice takes on a demanding tone.


“If I agree to this, you will do the following: You will take me out on romantic dates and you will be convincing as my fiancé. You will be an attentive lover until I have fulfilled my duty and have given you two children. After that I will be free to see whoever I want and you may do the same, but not him. You will ensure that our children will be styled ‘of Virginia and Carolina’ to show the merging of our family lines and I want to officially be one of your senior advisors. I have a Masters degree in political science and I intend to use it. Also, you won’t see him again. You won’t see plays he’s in and you won’t go anywhere you might run into him. Those are my conditions - take them or leave it.”


Blaine feels sick to his stomach as he considers it, but what else is there to do?


“Watch out for the announcement, then you’ll have your answer,“ he tells Charlotte because maybe he shouldn’t make any life changing decisions right now. Not before he’s read what Cooper has to say for himself. Maybe there’s a logical explanation for all this, because Cooper’s not cruel, he wouldn’t do this to Blaine if he didn’t have a plan, right? And he ensured that same sex married couples had the same rights regarding children as heterosexual couples, so he had to care about Blaine’s wellbeing.


“You have until the end of next week. If I haven’t heard anything till then I assume you think you could find a better bride than me. But let me tell me, you’re stupid if you think you can find anyone better suited than me.”


I already have and I just broke his heart, Blaine thinks, tears welling up in his eyes again.


“I’ll let you know,” he croaks before he quickly ends the call, because he doesn’t want her to hear him cry.


He picks up Cooper’s letter with shaking hands and pulls it out of the envelop.


Dear Blaine.


I wanted to start with Dear Squirt, but you are King now and not even I feel right about calling the King Squirt. Right now, you are probably incredibly angry with me, but hear me out. I was never the right choice for King. I want to do what Kurt does only out in Hollywood because theater is dead, not read boring bills and vote on things I don’t care about and don’t know enough about. I’m not you. You went back to college even though it wasn’t required of you. You know all those things about world politics even if it seemed unlikely that you would ever get to use the knowledge. You are compassionate and you care about the people in this Kingdom whereas I care mostly about myself. And Sarah, and Lucy, and Billy. I care about them so much, sometimes I can't believe it myself. They are my family now just like you are my family.


I didn’t do this to hurt you, Blaine, I did it because you are the right choice for this Kingdom and eventually the Church will accept you and Kurt too just like I have and just like so many others have since you met him. Not everyone will be happy about a King with a male partner, but I’m sure you will make such a great King, that people will stop caring about your sexuality eventually. So don’t hate me for springing this on you and not discussing it with you first. I knew you would try to talk me out of it, and I was tired of being King and tired of not being with the woman I love. You’ll meet her when I’m back from my honeymoon and then we can talk about all of this face to face. Hopefully by then, you will have forgiven your big brother a little bit and will open your arms to my new family.


With love,


Cooper


Blaine laughs hollowly when he’s finished with the letter because how can Cooper go on and on about Blaine and Kurt leading together when he knows they’ll have to break up eventually when Blaine has to settle down to start a family? How can his brother think it’s better for them to stay together for now and break up in what five years when Blaine’s thirty and expected to start a family? If it already hurts this much now, he doesn’t even want to imagine how much worse it would be to stay in a relationship with an expiration date. Love has always come second to the Crown and so it would be a relationship with an expiration date, even though Cooper’s probably right and the Church won’t force him to abdicate but only because there isn’t anyone suitable next in line they could exchange him for. But eventually he would have to give Kurt up for the Crown so the line of Virginia could live on or the bishops would groom one of his distant relatives for the throne and Blaine was truthful when he told Kurt he thought he could do a lot of good as King.


Puck and Sam trail him as he makes a pit stop on the balcony and sends out a silent prayer because his mother is in Europe again, London this time, so he doesn’t have to deal with her as well. With any luck she will go off on Cooper and leave Blaine alone for the time being. After stabbing out his cigarette he doesn’t bother with chewing gum before he walks downstairs to Sue’s office. They made him King so he should be allowed to do whatever he wants now.


“I have spoke to Lady Charlotte about the possibility of renewing our engagement,” he informs Sue and Emma and takes a seat behind Sue’s desk, making her sit opposite him next to Emma. “She has some demands but is on board in general. So I need you to draft a statement saying that I have ended my relationship with Kurt because as King I have to think about what’s best for the Kingdom and that I will start looking for a wife soon. Something about how privately I have always identified as bisexual but have kept it a secret because I know how bisexuals are treated even within the LGBT community. You can release this now and I’ll let you know when to announce my engagement to Lady Charlotte.”


Blaine’s met with stunned silence until Sue crossed her arms over her chest and stares him down until he’s squirming in his seat. Then she lays down the law.


“No. I will do neither. You are not thinking clearly and this screams PR nightmare and I’m not sure even I could spin this into something positive.”


“Maybe we could say you and Kurt are taking a time out to deal with your new position and to figure out what your new title means for your relationship,” Emma pipes up. “You don’t want to do anything drastic that you can’t take back before you have slept on it.”


Somehow he knows he can’t force either of them to do what he wants right now. He could fire them of course, but Blaine’s not stupid.  Sue Sylvester and Emma Pillsbury are working at the Palace for a reason - they are the best of the best in their fields.


“Fine, do that. Just get it out there that Kurt and I are over so I stop thinking what if. What if I’m missing something, what if I should try to make it work with Kurt. Because if it’s officially over, it’s over and I can start thinking about what’s best for the Kingdom.”


“It’s not what you are doing right now,” Sue informs him but Blaine just walks out of her office trying to ignore the voice in his head telling him that Sue’s right.


+*+


He gets a text from Blaine the next day that says ‘sorry’ and ‘it had to be done’. Attached is a link to an article in which the Palace confirms that King Blaine and Mr. Hummel are spending some time apart to reevaluate if a relationship is at all possible for them now that King Blaine has followed his brother onto the throne. ‘The King is considering what is best for America and what is best for America may as well not be what’s best for his personal relationship. Mr. Hummel understands that and is giving King Blaine the space to figure out how to move forward as King.”


“I did what now?” Kurt grumbles and he throws his phone down onto the couch when there’s a knock on the door.


Rachel’s outside with a shopping bag filled with ice cream, chocolate and a cheesecake.


“I can’t eat that - do you know how tight my costume is?” Kurt says in lieu of a greeting but steps aside to let her in. Dani’s at work and he could do with some company before he calls Blaine and yells at him.


“You’re going on tonight?” Rachel asks surprised.


“I went on last night, and I will today. They’re not going to see me cry or write about how I’m hiding at home because the King dumped me. No, if they’re going to write about me, then they’re going to write how I persevered, how I wouldn’t let anything put me down and how you couldn’t tell if I was hurting or not,” Kurt says with as much conviction as he can, because if he says it enough times, then he might start believing it too.


“Oh Kurt,” Rachel lets go of the bag and throws her arms around him. “I’m so sorry. I actually believed what the news said, because otherwise I would have brought Tequila. I can’t believe him. After everything you’ve done for him.”


Kurt just shrugs because he doesn’t have the energy right now to bash Blaine or defend him.


“I always knew he’d choose the Crown over me. I had just hoped he would never have to choose. But Cooper forced his hand, for whatever fucked up reason. Because I don’t care if he was doing it for love - how about how Blaine and I feel for each other? We love each other too, but Cooper, he thought his relationship was more important. And to let us find out from the news instead of telling us face to face, makes him a coward too.”


He ends up sharing a tube of ice cream after all when he’s done ranting and cursing the royal family.


The rest of the day is more of the same. Paparazzi waiting for him at the theater screaming questions about King Blaine at him that Kurt’s not allowed to answer anyway, pitying looks and well-meaning I’m sorrys from cast and crew and a few I told you sos from cast mates he doesn’t get along with. Kurt ignores them all, puts on his costume, does his makeup and becomes his role. After the show, he signs autographs on autopilot, fake smiles for pictures and ignores questions about his personal life. Then he gets a cab to drop him off at a subway station and takes a J train back home to Bushwick. The train’s less full this time of the night, but everyone’s staring at him, and quite a few people are openly filming him and taking pictures with their phones. Kurt doesn’t smile, but he doesn’t cry either. He won’t give them the satisfaction. Though he does give a teenage boy a brief smile when he tells Kurt he hopes he and the King will make up because they are his idols. Find new idols he wants to tell the boy, because eventually Blaine will announce his intention to marry a woman - for the good of the country. He hates that phrase so much.


He gets off the stop after the one closest to his apartment just to be safe and texts Dani as he walks out of the station.


Hey, I just remembered you saying Christine will be over tonight. So here’s my I’m a few blocks away warning - Kurt


Don’t worry about it - we went to hers. I thought you probably want to be alone tonight. Hope you’re doing okay - Dani


Before he can reply,  his phone is slapped out of his hand and he is being yanked into a deserted alley filled with overflowing dumpsters and what sounds like rats.


“Well, if it isn’t King Cocksucker’s fuck toy,” an unfamiliar voice says close to his ear, the man’s breath stale and his speech lightly slurred. “There we was thinking tonight was boring and suddenly there you were. No fancy guards tonight or do you only get them when he fucks you.”


Kurt wants to say for guys pretending to hate gays you seem to spend  a lot of time thinking about gay sex, but in this situation it’s probably better to keep his mouth shut. Because Dani isn’t home expecting him any minute now and getting worried when he doesn’t show up. No, no one knows where he is, because the theater saw him get into a cab and no one else on the train got off at this stop. And there’s a least three of them. The man with the disgusting breath has a tight grip on Kurt’s arms behind his back and though he should expect the first punch, he doesn’t and screams when a fist connects with his nose. There’s no way it isn’t broken, with blood running into his mouth while Kurt desperately fights to get out of the man’s hold before his companions can hit him again. But he’s not strong enough. All he’s trained in is stage fighting and that doesn’t help if your attacker isn’t following the same choreography.


The next punch to his stomach would have sent him to the ground were it not for the hands holding him up and Kurt screams again, hoping someone might hear and come to rescue him.


After, he loses track of time. All he knows is that soon there isn’t a single spot on his body that hasn’t been hit and he can barely see out of his eyes since both are nearly swollen shut by now. If he thought he knew what pain is because of the bullying in high school, he is sorely mistaken because the pain is blinding and Kurt loses consciousness more than once, only to come back to being kicked as he’s lying on the ground, his broken arms useless and his cracked ribs making it hard to breathe. He’s feeling dizzy and nauseous and his cheeks flush when he realizes that at some point he wet himself.


And then there are sirens approaching and Kurt’s never heard a more beautiful sound in his life before, because it makes his attackers flee the alley before everything goes dark around him.


When he comes to again, he is in an ambulance by the sound of it. He can’t see at all through his swollen shut eyes and every bone in his body hurts though he’s pretty sure he’s already been given something for the pain, because it feels different now. Not as blinding as before, but still bad enough that he whimpers in pain.


“Hey, don’t move. You’re in an ambulance and we’re taking you to the hospital. Can you tell us your name? You didn’t have your wallet on you when you were found.”


Kurt tries to joke ‘don’t you watch the news’ but he can’t even get his name out before he blacks out again.


The next time he wakes he’s in a hospital bed, a heart monitor steadily beeping next to his bed, a tube down his throat and a catheter making him pee in a bag all the clues he needs to determine his whereabouts.


“John Doe. Early twenties. Admitted last night and had emergency surgery performed on him after one of his lower left ribs injured his spleen and caused internal bleeding. Patient has three more fractured ribs, which we have not fixated since it would require additional surgery. Furthermore, the patient also has two broken arms, wrists and nearly all of his fingers, a concussion, broken nose and a broken ankle in his left leg. A cat scan showed no head trauma and as soon as we can get him back into an x-ray machine, we can start putting his broken bones into casts. No next of kin has been notified as of yet since the patient didn’t have ID on him and his fingerprints aren't in the system. Police will question him once we have extubated but until then, treat him like he’s allergic to most medication just to be safe. We will extubate as soon as possible to minimize the risk of infection and so we can transfer the patient out of the ICU, but for the moment his chest x-ray suggests that mechanical ventilation is the best treatment for his respiratory issues.”


There’s some quiet murmuring as the doctor and his med students leave the room, and Kurt wants to call after them to come back but he can’t with the tube down his throat. He can’t even write down his name because his hands are useless just like his arms. He only tries to move them once, because not even his painkillers are strong enough to make moving broken bones not painful.


A while later he’s wheeled out of his room and his broken bones are x - rayed.


“You are lucky,” a female voice tells him. “No complicated breaks so if you don’t overexert yourself the casts should come off in six to eight weeks. Hopefully we'll find your family soon though, because you’re going to need a lot of help,” she adds and Kurt grimaces around the tube in his throat because with both of his arms and hands broken, he won’t be able to do anything on his own. He’ll need help eating and drinking, getting dressed and using the bathroom once that embarrassing catheter comes out. And he won’t be able to perform. What’s worse, tonight’s his night off so the theater won’t report him missing and if Dani’s staying at her girlfriend’s again she won’t notice he hasn’t home either. People might call, but it probably won’t come across as strange if he doesn’t answer calls right now. So he’s stuck in this hospital where no one knows who he is with his whole body in pain just because he took the subway home to shake off the paparazzi. Recently, this relationship with Blaine has caused him nothing but pain. Shouldn’t have gotten involved, the angel on his shoulder sing - songs. Well, easier said then done. It would all be easier if he hadn’t fallen in love with Blaine.


He tries not to think about Blaine as he is wheeled back into his room and the same doctor starts wrapping his arms and leg with plaster, keeping up a constant chatter while Kurt wills his eyes to open far enough so he can see what’s happening around him. Before he succeeds though, he falls asleep again.


+*+*


“What?” Sue barks into the phone after another stressful day of trying to keep King Shortpants in line and making sure he doesn’t alienate the most vocal of his subjects in the first week of his reign by dumping Porcelain and publicly taking up with Lady Stick up her Ass again.


“I’m sorry,” her assistant Becky stutters. “But a woman called the Palace hotline saying she’s Kurt Hummel’s roommate and that he might be missing.”


“Who’s she trying to contact?” Sue massages her temples and wonders why she doesn’t just tell Becky to hang up on the roommate because the Palace doesn’t care about Kurt Hummel anymore now that King Shortsighted dumped him.


“You. She said she doesn’t want to alert his family until she knows that Kurt and the King haven’t secretly reconciled and Kurt’s just forgotten to tell her that he’s with the King.”


“Tell her I’ll call her back and not to talk to anyone else until I do. I need to have words with the King first.”


Giving up on killing her headache with natural means, she pops two Aspirin into her mouth before she strides down the hallway to the King’s office. His secretary tries to stop her, but he’s new and doesn't seem to know yet that Sue doesn’t need an audience to talk to the King.


“Where’s Porcelain? If you changed your mind about him, I need to know.”


The King looks up at her, his brows furrowed in confusion.


“I don’t know what you’re talking about. I haven’t seen Kurt since Cooper’s announcement. Maybe he’s in Ohio with his Dad.”


“I doubt it,” Sue tells him, “since his roommate went as far as calling the Palace to report him missing.”


The King in front of her pales and his hands start to shake.


“Kurt’s missing? We have to call the police.” King Shortpants orders her but Sue shakes her head.


“Out of the question. We just released a statement that the two of you are taking a break. You cannot report him missing. It will look like he ran off without telling you where he was going and people will know that you didn’t decide together to take a break. I’ll call the roommate and tell her he’s not with you and then she can report it.”


Sue leaves a shaking and white as a sheet King behind and wonders how much more work Porcelain and King Can’t Make Up His Mind will cause her until they either get their shit together or part ways for good. She would have thrown in the towel long ago, but unfortunately she does have a soft spot for King Shortpants.


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