Chapter 2: Papas version of our break

Christmas 2038

"In the fall of 2012 I was starting my first semester at Brown University while your dad was attending Berklee College of Music in Boston with your aunt Mercedes. And I immediately fell in love with it.

2012

Blaine took to Brown like a fish takes to water. His classes were interesting, the campus beautiful, and the student body diverse, introducing him to students from all over the world. Fortunately, his roommate had no problem with him being gay or Kurt visiting and spent most nights in his girlfriends room.

As Mark explained, the only reason they werent rooming together were his parents, devout Catholics who didnt think couples should live together before they were married. Mark and his girlfriend were high school sweethearts just like he and Kurt, he played the guitar in a small band and loved pizza just as much as Blaine. He had definitely hit the roommate checkpot.

During orientation he met a group of like-minded students who put on musicals – usually gender swapping the roles – and Blaine immediately signed up. They met for the first time before classes even started and Blaine was amazed by the talent in the group. He immediately signed up to audition for Maurice, the male version of Maureen in the groups version of Rent, and to his surprise got cast opposite Pierre, a foreign exchange student from France, playing John.

Labor Day weekend he drove up to Boston and spent the day exploring the city with Mercedes and Kurt, before he invited his boyfriend out to a romantic dinner at a restaurant close to the harbor. When they returned to Mercedes and Kurts shared room Mercedes was gone, only leaving a note saying she would text them before she returned.

After not seeing each other for nearly two weeks, they tore off their clothes, too impatient to take the time to undress one another. Once they recuperated from round one, Blaine took his time to map out Kurts body with his lips, before making love to him. They didnt leave the bed, even though they barely fit into it, until Mercedes texted Kurt the next morning, telling him to put his clothes back on.

They shared a shower – to conserve water of course – and asked Mercedes to join them for lunch as a thank you for giving them the room. After lunch, Mercedes and Kurt showed him around campus and Blaine made a mental note to return the favor the following week when Kurt would visit the Brown campus for the first time.

The first few weeks they took turns visiting the other, taking advantage of the fact that their schools were only an hour apart if traffic was good. But then Blaine had to cancel because he had rehearsals and Kurt had already made plans with his study group knowing that he could leave Blaine with Mercedes for a bit.

Because Kurt sounded pissed that he canceled last minute, he drove up to Boston Sunday afternoon to surprise his boyfriend even if it was just for a few hours. Kurt was ecstatic to see him and talked about how much he was looking forward to moving to New York because then they could be together all the time.

It was when Blaine realized that he had fallen in love with Brown and didnt want to leave at the end of the semester. But Kurt looked so happy talking about New York, that Blaine didnt say anything. It was only October after all, plenty of time for Kurt to fall in love with his own school and change his mind about transferring as well.

Of course ignoring the difficult topics was never a good idea and it all came head to head a month later when Kurt was in town so that they could look for an apartment together. He had feigned enthusiasm when Kurt had talked about nothing but New York the past few weeks, but for him they had only cemented that he wanted to stay in Providence.

"What about that one? Its about halfway between our schools." Kurt pointed at the third apartment on the webpage they were looking at. "I know its not the cheapest but if we share the rent and both get jobs we should be able to make it."

He knew then that he had to be honest with Kurt, consequences be damned. They could still visit – maybe not every weekend because theyd have to deal with a three hour drive but they could still make it work.

"Im not transferring to Columbia. I love Brown and Im going to stay here," he finally said, bracing himself for Kurts reaction.

His boyfriend just stared at him at first before he started laughing hysterically.

"Youre kidding right? Thats just your weird idea of a joke?"

Blaine shook his head.

"Im sorry. I know thats not what you want to hear but we can still make it work. Its just three hours."

Kurt stopped laughing.

"Youre not doing this to me. To us! We were supposed to move in together after junior year and when you moved in with your mom instead, I understood and I supported you, but this. This is not what we agreed on. We agreed to transfer to New York after our first semester so we could be together. How can you say you love me when you apparently dont want to be with me anymore."

Blaine couldnt believe Kurt was dragging senior year into this. And while he really didnt want to fight with Kurt about this, there was something he couldnt stop himself from saying.

"You seem to forget that I already got into Columbia and deferred my admission so I could be closer to you. Plans change Kurt. And Im not saying I never want to move to New York. Just not right now," he tried his luck nevertheless.

Kurt just kept shaking his head.

"You cant think I would be okay with four years of long distance? Do you want to be with other guys? Is this what this is about?""

Blaine shook his head frantically.

"I love you Kurt, but Im happy here. I dont want to resent you one day for following you to New York."

Kurt looked at him like he had just compared Lady Gaga to Hitler.

"Why would you resent me? Its New York, Blaine!"

"And it will still be there after I graduate, unless one of those natural disaster movies comes true," he tried to joke but Kurt just crossed his arms in front of his chest.

"Im moving to New York after Christmas, Blaine. And youre either coming with me or I think we should take a break to reevaluate our relationship. See if we still want the same thing."

The ultimatum came out of the blue and for a moment he considered just giving in right now to make the fight go away. But something was holding him back.

"Kurt, come on. Dont be like that. Of course I still want the same things." He tried to put his hand on Kurts arm, but his boyfriend pulled back and took a step back.

"Ive got to go. Call me when youve come to your senses," Kurt spat, visibly angry and Blaine didnt try to stop him again.

He felt like his heart was trying to jump out of his chest as he watched Kurt leave, but stayed rooted on the spot.

Christmas 2038

"Dad said you broke up. Does that mean you didnt move to New York with him?" Ella asks when Kurt gets up to refill their cups.

Blaine nods and his daughter smacks him over the head with a pillow.

"Dick move, Papa."

"Ella, language! And I love my alma mater. I dont regret staying at Brown."

"But what about Dad?" Ella argues while Alex watches them like theyre playing ping pong.

Blaine smiles at his husband who is balancing five mugs of hot chocolate before he points at his kids.

"Not to spoil the ending, but there will be a happy ending."

Ella rolls her eyes before her eyes light up.

"Did you date someone else while you and dad were broken up."

"Were on a break," he and Kurt say in unison before Kurt smirks.

"Well, were you?"

2013

"Why dont you go out with that dude from your Tonal Music Theory class," Mark asked in late January, after school had been in session again for two weeks. "Hes been hitting on you for months and now that youre single maybe you should say yes."

He and Kurt hadnt spoken again after Blaine told him that he was staying in Rhode Island regardless of Kurts plans to move to New York. Christmas was a quite affair this year, after his mother declined their invitation to the Hudmels Christmas party because she didnt want him to be alone on Christmas. It wasnt boring though because Cooper showed up late on Christmas Eve and stayed till New Years after which he returned to L.A and Blaine drove back to school.

His only contact to Kurts family after they took a break was Carole, who called him to let him know that Kurt had indeed left Boston and was now living in New York. That night he was pissed Kurt hadnt told him himself so he sent him a text, saying best of luck, I hope its worth it. Unsurprisingly, Kurt hadnt texted back.

"Dude are you even listening to me?" Mark interrupted his train of thought.

"You know who I mean, right? That guy that was all over you the one time we went clubbing." Blaine nodded but made a face.

"Eli. You really want me to go out with a guy who didnt care that I was in a relationship when he was continuously hitting on me? Trust me, if that class wasnt a prerequisite I would have dropped it just to get away from him."

Mark wasnt faced by his little rant and just looked thoughtful for a moment.

"Okay, no to that Eli dude. But what about that guy from your theater group. Joey?" Mark suggested next. Blaine shook his head again.

"He is straight. You are a horrible wingman. Not that I need one. Kurt and I didnt break up, okay. I dont think well have a chance of getting back together if he thinks Im cheating on him."

"I feel you, man. I dont know what Id do if Becca ever broke up with me."

When he first met Mark, Blaine had loved that they both were with their high school sweethearts, but now, it just felt like he was rubbing it in.

"And how do you know he isnt seeing anyone in New York? There must be tons of gay dudes at Julliard."

Blaine threw a pillow at Mark.

"Stereotype much?" Mark just laughed before he grabbed his bag and left to meet his girlfriend.

Later that night Blaine texted Santana, because while she and Kurt werent BFFS like Kurt, Mercedes and Rachel, she was Blaines and shed do what she could for him.

Is Kurt seeing someone? Dont tell him I asked.

Santana reported back that Rachel was trying to set him up with a guy she was in a play with, but it still took him till early March until he let Mark set him up on a date.

Mike was a junior, majoring in architecture like his roommate, and he was perfectly nice and quite good-looking. The only problem was that he wasnt Kurt. So he cut their date short before they could order dessert because Blaine didnt want to lead him on. Mike didnt take it too hard, fortunately, having recently ended a long-term relationship as well. He did offer his rebound services, but Blaine felt bad enough just being on a date with a guy that wasnt Kurt.

Who was absolutely miserable in New York according to Santana. Theyd texted a few times since February, starting with drunk text Kurt sent him in the middle of the night a few days before Valentines Day, telling him how much he missed him. The next morning Kurt texted again to say Santana had stolen his phone, but after that they texted every now and then; mostly about trivial stuff like the outfit of one of Kurts classmates or a fabulous restaurant he had eaten where he came across Woody Allen.

Thanks to Santana he knew that Kurt was just pretending to be happy, but he didnt want to be the one to call him out on it. Kurt had insisted on the break, so the ball was in his court as far as Blaine was concerned.

His second date with a fellow music major was in April and this time he stayed till the end. Andrew liked talking about himself more than anything but they had a fun evening. One that Blaine wanted to cut short nevertheless, until Santana sent him a text while Andrew went to the bathroom.

Kurts on a date, was all she sent and Blaine stayed for dessert. That night he let Andrew kiss him goodnight, but when the other boy didnt call him again, he felt relived. It had been just a kiss, but it had felt wrong and Blaine realized that he couldnt date someone else until he knew for sure that his relationship with Kurt was over for good.

Santana texted him again the next morning and let him know that Kurt decided never to go on a blind date again, because this guy was even worse than the first one Rachel had tried to set him up with.

For the rest of the semester he focused solely on school and spent weekends with his theater group, where he was the only single gay guy and didnt have to worry about someone coming on to him.

To his surprise his Theory of Tonal Music II professor offered him a job before the semester let out. Professor Richardson was putting on Carmen for a summer musical festival and needed someone to play the piano during rehearsals. Rehearsals wouldnt start until early June so he had time to go home and stay with his mom for a bit.

The day of his last final, Carole called. They spoke once a month, but Blaine was surprised to hear from her because they had just talked a few days ago.

"I forgot to invite you to my graduation the last time we talked. I really hope you can make it, because you are family regardless of whether you and Kurt are together or not," his second surrogate mother told him and Blaine felt a bit chocked up.

"Ill be there," he promised before he could change his mind about it.

It was high time he and Kurt saw each other again and talked about things. Because things couldnt stay the way they were now. The not knowing, at this point, was even worse than breaking up, because he was still hopeful that they could make it work.

So he resolved that if he and Kurt hadnt had an honest talk before the end of the summer he would break up with Kurt permanently and try to move on. Their situation wasnt fair to either one of them, and if Kurt didnt have the guts to end it if he really didnt want to be with Blaine anymore then Blaine would have to suck it up and just do it.

Christmas 2038

"So you knew Dad was miserable but didnt say anything?" Ella asks, looking unimpressed. Even though shes biologically Blaines, she looks so much like Kurt in this moment.

"I was still angry and thought the ball was in his court. And we were only 18 and 19. In some ways we were still just kids," Blaine explains and his husbands nods before he kisses Blaines cheek.

"But why didnt you like New York, Dad?" Alex asks Kurt. "Weve lived there all our life and you seem happy."

"I guess the timing just wasnt right and I hated school…"