“He actually said that?” Kurt asked Blaine as they were eating a school lunch of hot dogs with a terrible bun-to-dog ratio and a big ass tator tot called a “Tri-Tator.” They were eating lunch at the teacher's table in the cafeteria. They were the only two teachers who tolerated being within ten feet of the students during their free time so they were usually the only ones occupying the table.

“He did. It was really strange, too. He hit on me during class,” Blaine said as he squirted ketchup onto his semi-digestible meal. Kurt's eyes widened. A gay student hitting on a teacher? Well this was just too good.

“You're kidding me, right?”

Blaine smirked. “I wish I was.”

Kurt laughed at Blaine. He wasn't exactly being coy about a student trying to make a pass at him.

“Oh my god! You didn't like it did you?” Kurt asked disgustedly. Blaine looked down and his face went as red as his hot dog. “You did didn't you?”

Blaine tried to defend himself, “No I didn't! Why would I like it?”

Kurt's face deadpanned. “Blaine, you're blushing.”

The color drained from Blaine's soft face as Kurt called him out on his secret. “Okay, Kurt. Just let me explain.”

Kurt dropped the grapes he was eating and didn't even bother to pick them up as they bounced onto the floor. “You do like him! Oh my god are you insane? He's a minor! You can't just go fucking fifteen year olds!”

Blaine put his hands up and said, “Kurt, I am not having sex with him and I certainly don't like him! It's just...no one's ever exactly hit on me before. I got excited.” Kurt gave him a queer look, no pun intended, Kurt thought. “That's all. So don't go and get your Chino's in a bunch.”

Kurt snorted. Like he'd ever wear Chino's. “So, no one's ever hit on you?”

Blaine's faced turned red again. “Well, no. The opportunity's never come up.”

“So...you've never...you know.”

Blaine almost spit out his milk. “No, Kurt I am not a virgin if that's what you're asking! I've had plenty of sex with plenty of gay men so don't even go there. I'm just saying that it's always been more innocent than that. We've always just been set up or it just...led to making out and the eventual fucking that follows a steamy make out session.”

Kurt thought about this for a moment. “Have you ever been to a gay bar?”

“No,” Blaine answered bluntly.

A smile grew on Kurt's face as an idea sprouted in his mind. “Today is Friday. You and are going to Scandal's tonight and we are going to get you a man to flirt with.”

Blaine groaned. “That cheesy gay bar downtown? I don't know...”

“I'm sorry but it's either that or allow teenaged closet cases come onto you because you have never felt the pleasure of a grown man leaning in close to you and whispering sweet nothings into your ear.”

Blaine thought about it for a millisecond before making up his mind.

“Let's get me laid.”