The stench of mediocrity and homophobia filled his nostrils as Blaine emerged out of the airport, back into Lima, Ohio. He looked around in search of a familiar face, or a sign that held his name and was glad to find his father waving excitedly at him at the far end of the car park.

It had been several years since Blaine had been back to Lima, and the town had pretty much remained it's lifeless, tedious self.

"Hi dad," Blaine smiled. 

"Come here you," Mr Anderson bellowed, before pulling his son into a tight squeeze. 

Being as wealthy as his parents were, they would often travel out to New York to visit Blaine. They had even once considered making the big move to the big apple, but Blaine objected it strongly. He wanted to try and live as independent as he could, despite sharing an apartment with Rachel Berry.

"How have you been?" his dad asked once they parted from their longing embrace. 

"Fine, dad. You and mum came to New York just last week to see me! Nothing much can possibly change in a week, you know," Blaine pointed out humoursly.

"Where's Rachel?"

"She's flying in tomorrow, I think. She was caught up with rehearsals for her Broadway show." Blaine told.

"Alright then. Come on we better get going."

Blaine threw his small luggage into the trunk, before jumping into the passenger seat. When Blaine first started Julliard, he made regular trips to a nearby coffee place. That was where he bumped into Rachel. They had talked often since then and were basically best friends. At the news of both of them hating their dorm room mates at their separate schools, Rachel had proposed a suggestion that they should get an apartment and live together.

It did not take much effort into asking both their parents to finance the apartment they had so meticulous picked out. The apartment- was in every way Blaine's dream apartment.

"So where's mum?" Blaine asked after he stepped out of his recollections.

"Mum is with Carole, finalizing the details of the wedding reception." 

A few months ago, Burt had called Blaine and told him that he was getting married, with Carole Hudson. He could not have been more happier for the man, because in truth Blaine somehow felt guilty leaving Kurt's father in Lima. He would often tell Burt about it, but the man would shut him up almost immediately. Blaine was glad that Burt was not completely alone, at least. And he knew Kurt would not have protested in his father's choice of bride. Carole was a motherly saint it was physically impossible not to love her.

Though he knew his own father had gone to Burt's on a daily basis to bond over a football match being talecast on the television. How close the both of them had gotten was both admirable, and a little creepy. Aren't in laws suppose to hate each other's guts?

The car made a sharp turn into a neighbour- that was all too painfully familiar. 

"You okay?" Mr Anderson asked from the driver seat as he studied Blaine's clenched blanket of expression.

"Yeah, fine," Blaine forced himself to say.

They pulled into the driveway of The Hummels and emerged out the vehicle into the warm atmosphere of the neighbourhood. The stony pathway still looked the same, the grass of the front lawn here still dull green, but the porch was bare.

Walking up to the house, Blaine's mind kept wandering back into his memories with his dear late husband, but it wasn't as painful as he had thought. They were blissful memories. Memories he would go back to whenever he felt the world's problems were on his shoulders. Memories he would run to, to seek some solace and inner peace. Memories he would smile at, serving as a reminder that he knew what true love meant.

Blaine tapped the white frame door lightly with his knuckles, and it pulled open quickly as a man in his beat up baseball cap stood in the middle of the frame.

"Kid!" Burt yelled happily before pulling Blaine into a bear hug that probably crushed his ribs.

"How've you been?" 

"I've fine, Mr Hummel. You?" Blaine asked as they parted. 

"Same ol', same ol'," Burt smiled his comfortingly fatherly smile. "Did you just arrive?" Burt asked.

"Yeah. I'm so happy for you Mr Hummel!"

"Thanks, kid. Come on in you two," Burt gestured. They walked into the home, and Blaine was taken aback for a mile second as he studied the bare house. It held very little furniture compared to the last time he had been here.

"Urm, what happened to the furniture on the front porch?" Blaine asked.

"Packed it up, along with the rest of the furniture. Carole and I bought a house."

"You're moving?" Blaine asked as he walked into the kitchen along with Burt. Mr Anderson stayed in the living room and, because he had been here countless of times, he made himself at home before Burt even said anything.

"Yeah. Still in Lima though, just to a bigger house." Burt told. 

A look of uncertainty washed over Blaine's features. Though he knew he had no say in the matter whatsoever, he wished Burt would have kept the house. It held so much memories of him and Kurt, memories than would turn into a vision of reality whenever he stepped into the house. But, following the encouragement that Burt had advised him with, he knew Burt needed a change of surrounding too. Whether the man would admit to it, or not.

"What's wrong?"

"Oh- nothing. Did you- urm- packed Kurt's bedroom as well?"

"Yeah. Took awhile because that kid has so many things in his room, but yeah I managed to pack them all. They're still in his bedroom, in case you wanted to keep some or the things," Burt suggested.

Blaine bit his lower lip as the nerves of entering what was once upon a time the bedroom he shared with his husband donned of him. He hadn't been in Kurt's bedroom since the funeral, five years ago. He wasn't particularly sure why, but a part of him was scared he might find something that would possibly alter his perception on Kurt. 

"There's nothing in there besides clothes, and books and magazines," Burt told, as if he was reading Blaine's fearful mind. "Go ahead, kid.." Burt finished off, before he poured coffee into two mugs and left the kitchen to join Mr Anderson in the living room.

Hesitant and scared as he was, Blaine took short steps towards the bedroom door. He held the cold metal knob in his hand and shut his eyes as tightly as humanly possible before turning the circular object in a clockwise motion and pushing the door open.

Step after step Blaine descended down to the basement, slash bedroom. It was true, Burt had packed almost everything. The night stand, the bed frame, the vanity table were all secured in bubble wrap, except an open brown box that sat at the edge of the mattress.

As if something might jump out of the box and stab his eye, Blaine tried to peek inside the box from where he stood five yards away from the box. 

"You can do this, Anderson," Blaine murmured to himself and confidently strolled towards the box. He carried it and placed it on his lap before emptying out the contents.

The first item his hand grasp upon was a plastic comb. He recognized it as the one Kurt usually used at the hours he spent styling his hair to utter perfection. Blaine would still be in bed, watching in admiration as his husband would stand in front of the tall mirror, one hand holding a blow dryer, the other holding the comb and cursed himself every now and then when he didn't get to the style he wanted.

Smiling at his memory, Blaine placed the comb next to his thigh on the bed before fishing out another item, this time it was metal chain. A metal chain he recognized as the one Kurt had on when they went out on their first official date. The accessory that hung lazily on both sharp ends of his collared shirt. It was a jewellery that reminded him of the night their love for each other took off into a higher direction, a direction of physical intimacy.

Placing the accessory next to the comb, he fished out for more items but they were mostly things that did not whole much sentimental value. A fashion magazine Kurt used to flip through during his past time. A pen, a paper clip, hair products that were half empty. He took them all out, until he came upon a story book.

He knew the book. It was the book Kurt read at their first chemistry class. It was the book Blaine had borrowed from the library, but never got around to actually finishing it. He was even pretty sure he had never returned it back to the library. Smiling at his discovery, Blaine placed all the other contents into the box, and dropped them to the floor.

He then flopped onto the mattress, the springs squeaking at the sudden weight. It was obvious nobody had ever slept on it since Kurt passed. It even still held the faint scent of the beautiful boy. Sweet, intoxicating, apple cherry shampoo was coated on the mattress. It made salty tears form on the corners of Blaine's brown eyes, but he didn't bother to wipe them away. It was nice, to feel like he was in his past. 

New York still felt like the future to Blaine, and despite his wedding ring always intact around his finger to remind him of Kurt, it still felt vacant. Like a presence was still not present. It was nice to allow himself to full sink back into the past. To lay on the bed he and Kurt made love on countless of times. To feel the white fluffy carpet ticking his toes. 

Blaine rose to a sitting position and smiled as his looked around the familiar room. Though the place held many memories of Kurt, they were not as vivid as the memories edged into his brain. Those memories, he knew would never be put up for sale- like the house.

"That's it? You don't want to take any of his clothes?" Burt asked once Blaine had emerged out of the bedroom and walked out into the living room. 

"Yup, this is all I need. Besides, I don't think I can pull of his clothes like he could," Blaine smiled. He unzipped his backpack that he had placed on the carpet and carefully slipped the storybook into it.

Totally oblivious to the little sharp end of a piece of paper that stuck out from the centre pages.

"Blaine, can I talk to you for awhile? Outside?" Burt said.

"Sure," Blaine shrugged.

He followed Kurt's father out of the house, leaving Mr Anderson who had his eyes fixated on the television watching the food network. They emerged out onto the landing of the front porch. Burt rested his elbows onto the wooden railings, staring out into the open.

"I heard you graduated from Julliard," Burt said.

"Yup. Bachelor's Degree in Performing Arts," Blaine informed.

"We're so proud of you. Kurt would've been proud of you."

Blaine smiled as his eyes wandered far from where they were standing. He watched a woman who was busy muttering to herself as she carried out a trash bag out onto the streets. "You remind me a lot of Kurt," Burt said, pulling Blaine's attention away from the boring scene.

He stared, confused at the man. "What do you mean?"

"You're braver, and stronger than you think you are, Blaine. Much like Kurt. You both also have the same heart. Compassionate. Selfless, putting the people you love before yourself. You remind me a lot of him."

"I wouldn't be what I am now, if it wasn't for Kurt."

"C'mon kid, give yourself some credit. Kurt influenced you, sure, but you were naturally that way. Your dad told me how you were as a kid. He told me how you stood up for a boy in your elementary school because some bullies were taunting him. He told me how you once saw a homeless man sitting at a dumpster behind a mall and you forced your dad to buy a meal at McDonalds just to give it to him."

"Those are just simple acts of kindness, Mr Hummel."

"No, Blaine. Most kids at that age would have just kept to themselves and hope the same treatment wont happen to them. Give yourself some credit, okay?"

Blaine smiled shyly. He did not know what to make of it. Sure, he always considered himself a kind person, and even now whenever he saw a homeless man in the streets of New York he would run to the nearest bakery store to purchase a piece of bread for the guy, but to Blaine that was just being nice. He never really saw it as some profound package of compassion.

"Which is why, I was hoping you would be my best man," Burt said, pulling Blaine out of his train of thought. He was startled as he stared at the man with wide eyes.

"Wh- me?"

"You were Kurt's reason of happiness, having you as my best man feels not only appropriate, it feels right. And besides, like I said, you remind me a lot of Kurt. Having you as my best man, would be like having Kurt himself as my best man."

"Mr Hummel- I would be honored."

Blaine flung his arms around Kurt's father, and was near the edge of tearing up. What made him want to cry, was what Burt had said collectively. He never pegged himself to be similar to Kurt. Kurt was his own self, a unique specimen. It tugged on his heart strings, what Burt had said.

-----

"What are these? I never ordered these! These center pieces belong to a bloody homeless shelter. Where are the white roses! I specifically picked out white roses!" Mrs Anderson screamed at a poor teenage boy who looked afraid, as though the woman was about to cut his throat if she didn't get the right flowers in nanonseconds.

"Mum?" Blaine called out. She spun around to face Blaine with blazes in her eyes, but relaxed when she realized it was her son.

"Blainey! Come give your mother a hug!" 

Blaine smiled shrinkingly at the nickname before allowing his mother to pull him into a tight squeeze. "When did you get here?" she asked as she dismissed the confused flower delivery boy with her manicured finger nails.

"Yesterday," Blaine told.

"Oh I'm sorry honey. I've just been really busy perfecting this wedding for Burt and Carole! I'm glad you're here, and Burt told me you're going to be the best man?"

"Yeah," Blaine breathed. His eyes widening as if he still found it to be unreal.

"Well it feels appropriate. You're like a son to him."

"Thanks, mum. Why are you so stressed out anyway?"

"Because I'm trying to get everything right! Oh my god what is that! That is not lace cut out table cloths!" she yelped, before dashing away.

Shrugging, Blaine walked a short distance from the unprepared wedding reception, to the church. His heart throbbed a little as he remembered the last time he had left this very same church, with a heavy heart. Gulping down his recollections, he entered the church and went in search for where Burt was getting ready.

He climbed the stairs up to the second level and pushed the the first door on the right to find Burt fixing his bow tie in front of a tall mirror. Finn Hudson, Carole's son, was sprawled on the couch, too engrossed with his iPhone.

"Blaine, there you are. What do you think?" Burt gave a little awkward spin, and stared questioningly at Blaine.

"I think Kurt taught you well," Blaine smiled.

"You think it looks good?" Burt asked, a little unsure of himself.

"Yes, Mr Hummel. You look dashing."

"Thanks, kid. I really wanna look my best, you know, for Carole."

"I don't really think she cares how you look, Burt. She's seen you in those washed out jeans and your signature baseball cap, and she's still marrying you," Finn answered, his eyes still focused on the screen of his phone.

"Yeah," Blaine nodded.

"I guess you're both right. God, I'm so nervous I don't know why."

"Because you're getting married, Burt. As long as you're not getting cold feet, you're fine."

Burt smiled at him, before turning around to the mirror and adjusting his bow tie, though it already looked fine before. He began pacing the room, picking up anything he could reach just to place it somewhere. Blaine watched him in amusement. He never saw Kurt's father looking this anxious before. He always seemed like the collected fatherly type of person. Seeing him walking around with his wits out the window made Blaine want to laugh away.

"How's Rachel?" Finn asked from the seat next to Blaine. "I heard you two share an apartment in New York." The man had jealousy riddled all over his speech.

"You do know that I'm gay, right?" Blaine laughed.

"Fine. But how is she? Is she- urm- dating anyone?"

"Why don't you ask her that later yourself," Blaine said.

It was awhile before the ceremony started. Burt had basically rearranged everything that was in the room, neither Blaine nor Finn bothered to try and calm him down. They tried to once, but an anxious Burt Hummel almost ripped their heads off, so they decided to mind their own businesses.

"Okay, we need the groom now," Mrs Anderson said as she entered the room.

"Finn, stop checking Facebook for Rachel's latest status update. You're going to see her in awhile!" Blaine yelled.

"Dude, that was an invasion of privacy-"

"Be quiet, the both of you. Come on we're going to be late. Burt," Mrs Anderson called as she gestured for Burt to follow her. Finn left the room first, but just as Blaine was about to follow suit, Burt grasped him lightly on the shoulder.

"Do you think Kurt would be upset? That I'm remarrying?"

"What?" Blaine asked, in disbelief at the man's insecurity.

"A part of me feels like, if he was still alive, he wouldn't be on board.." Burt trailed off.

"Mr Hummel, Kurt would not have been upset. He would be happy even. In the short time span of him knowing Carole, he loved her. He told me himself. Besides, Kurt would have wanted you to be happy, he wouldn't want you to be lonely."

"You really think so, kid?" 

"Yes, Mr Hummel. Like you said, being selfless was his nature.."

"God I wish he was here." Burt sighed heavily.

Blaine looked at the man sadly, before he began meticulously pulling off the yellow brooch of the sun that was pinned on the collar of his tuxedo coat- the brooch he wore with everything that he put on. Whether it was a fitted suit, or a lazy white t shirt with jeans, the brooch would always be on him.

"Here," Blaine offered as he began pinning the brooch onto the man's collar.

"What's this?" Burt asked in confusion.

"It's a brooch. A brooch that Kurt gave me a few days before he passed. He gave it to me because he wanted something of him to always be on me. Today, you're going to have it on as you get married to Carole, so you'll know that Kurt is with you."

"Blaine..I can't take this from you-"

"It's okay, Mr Hummel. Kurt would agree with me on this," Blaine smiled.

"You really do remind me a lot of him," Burt said, tears in his eyes before he pulled Blaine into yet another spine crushing hug. He smiled widely as they parted before leaving the room.

As Burt stood there, opposite the woman he would soon be wedded in holy matrimony to, reciting his vows, repeating after the minister -he was calm. Happy even. He did not feel as though something was missing in his life. Like the absence of his son he had felt for a long time, was filled.

Though the mental picture of his son was still well plasted on the side walls of his brain, the physical presence was filled, by the boy who reminded him a lot of his own son. Blaine, who did not take the place of Kurt, because no one ever could, but however filled the role in his own way.

-----

"Cheers, to the bride and groom!" 

Every body followed suit. Raising their glass in the air in celebratory to the married couple. Burt and Carole smile in thanks, as they entwined their arms together so that Carole drank from Burt's glass, and Burt the same.

Blaine stood at the far corner of the room, sipping red wine. He smiled as he watched Kurt's father laughed and whispered something to Carole. Like Kurt, Burt deserved every bit of happiness the world had to offer. He had gone through so much losing two people that meant the world to him. It seemed only fitting that he found happiness.

"Blaine Anderson, is that you?" 

A sweet angelic voice called from somewhere in his background. Blaine spun around, to find a stunning woman with her blond hair swinging on her shoulders as she walked towards Blaine. Her hand was tightly clasped with a little girl, that inherited the woman's beautiful emerald green eyes, but she had dark raven hair.

"Quinn!" Blaine yelled in excitement. He let her pull him into a pined hug. 

"I haven't seen you for like forever! How have you been?" she asked as they parted from their embrace.

"I've been great. Yourself? And who is this cutie pie?" Blaine asked as he got on his knees so he was at the same height with the little girl.

The girl's youthful skin blushed, and she quickly slid behind the protection of her mother's legs. "Introduce yourself, sweetie," Quinn encouraged. She peered from behind Quinn, her green eyes were piercingly beautiful.

"I- I'm Beth," she squeaked in her baby voice.

"It's nice to meet you, Beth. I'm Blaine, your mama's friend" he smiled, holding out his hand to the little girl. She took it nervously. Her tiny hands shook Blaine's gently, before she slid behind her mother again.

"She has your eyes," Blaine told as he stood up to meet Quinn again.

"And her father's hair colour. How have you been?" Quinn asked, patting him lightly on his shoulders.

"I've been fine. You know, as fine as anyone can be, living in New York. Did you graduate out of Yale?"

"Yup. Degree in Law Studies," Quinn smiled.

"I'm so proud of you, Quinn. See, I did tell you once upon a time that you'll figure everything out." Blaine said. "How's Puck-"

"Anderson!" a deep voice of a man called his name. He didn't have time to even look to where the voice came from, because in that second Puck came barrelling towards him, jumping onto him with a hug. "Damn Anderson when was the last time I saw you!" Puck laughed.

"Probably five years ago! How have you been, Puckerman?"

"Fine, great. With these two beautiful ladies in my life how can I not be great," Puck smiled. He pulled the little girl from behind Quinn, who squealed before giggling in the most innocent way possible as her father put her onto his shoulders.

Blaine smiled at the perfect family portrait that stood in front of him. Quinn looking her breath takingly beautiful self, Puck, who had cleaned up pretty good for himself. He was bald now, and he rocked it. The little girl, was in every way perfection. She inherited the best traits from her parents Blaine was pretty sure she was going to be a heart breaker in the vast future.

"Love your beard," Quinn laughed, trailing her fingers along the stubs on Blaine's jaw.

"Thanks. So you guys are married? You better say no because I'm going to be severely pissed that I wasn't invited to the wedding." Quinn laughed.

"No, no. We're not married-"

"- yet," Puck glanced cheekily at Quinn, making her blush.

"Well when it happens, don't forget to send an invite to New York."

"Dada, I want to go see the swans," the girl asked in her timid voice. 

"Sure baby. Say goodbye to uncle Blaine," he told.

She did a cute goodbye wave before being carried away by her dad. It was weird to see Puck to be so loving to another human being. Puck used to be such a, for lack of better word, caveman, around McKinley it was nice to see him play the role of a father.

"He's a really good dad," Quinn said as she watched her future-husband dance away with her daughter.

"Never doubted he wouldn't be," Blaine smiled.

"So, how is life in New York?" Quinn asked, snapping back from watching her small family in awe.

"It's fine. I've been offered a few jobs at Broadway theatres to play, but I'm really trying to compose a piece of music of my own." Blaine told.

"That's amazing, Blaine! Are you- you know..dating anyone?" she asked nervously.

"No," Blaine said.

It wasn't as if there weren't any offers. New York is basically infected with gay men. His first week of Julliard alone, a couple of guys had came up  to him and asked him out for coffee- some were more blunt to their actual intentions of asking him out though. He didn't really see the point in dating. Or getting to know anyone in that romantic sense. There was no point, because he knew nobody could ever be as amazing as his late husband, Kurt. Nobody would even come close.

"Do you think you're ever going to date again?..it's been five years after all," Quinn pointed out, but by her facial expression, it was obvious she regretted what she said. "Oh god, I'm sorry-"

"It's okay, Quinn," Blaine smiled reassuringly. "I don't know. Maybe in the far far future I'll try dating again, but for now..no. I don't think I'm ready," Blaine said.

"Okay, well I'm glad to see you, and I hope to see you again- soon. It's been far too long, Blaine! I have to go find Puck. He always lets that little girl do whatever she wants, it's crazy. We're equal parents, but somehow I always end up being the bad cop. See you soon, handsome," Quinn pulled him into a goodbye hug, before she hurried away to where Puck was laughing as Beth threw pebbles into the little pond where the swans were swaying in.

It seemed like Blaine was being pulled everywhere. The next hour, he was thrown left and right into conversations with people from McKinley. Apparently being a nurse, and the only tyre shop owner in Lima meant that you were best friends with the entire population or Lima, Ohio. Everyone was there, from doctor Sanders, to JBI, to the brunette and blond cheerleaders Santana and Brittany.

As the hours started to draw closer to midnight, people started to leave the wedding reception. Soon, the only people left were Rachel and Finn, who were locked in each other's arms slow dancing on the dance floor. Mr and Mrs Anderson who, to Blaine's displeasure of sight, were making out at a table set at the far end of the venue. Burt and Carole were smiling into each other's eyes, as they moved with every step to the music.

Blaine ascended up the stage, and took the microphone into his hands, gesturing for the band to silent with his finger. 

"Mister and Mrs Hummel," Blaine addressed into the mic, getting the attention of the small group of people left. "I am so very happy for you both, and because I guiltily forgot to get you both a wedding gift, I thought I would play for you something, as my gift." He smiled, before taking his place in his best element; the piano.

He traced the ivory keys, what he would always do before a performance, and began playing the perfect song, he thought would be perfect for a wedding. His fingers went by the natural motion that it would always go whenever his fingers came into contact with piano keys. The small crowd watched him in awe, and Burt and Carole swayed on the dance floor, their eyes dancing with the sheer love they had for each other.

With the last note, he concluded the song, only to be greeted with applause of admiration. "Kid that was amazing, thank you!" Burt yelled, once the tune of Celine Dion's Because You Loved Me ended. 

It was one of Blaine's favourite songs to play, because it also summarised how Kurt made him feel. The lyrics, were point blank true. It was a song he would play whenever he missed Kurt too much, when the loud noises and bright lights of New York got a little too overwhelming for him.

Blaine descended down from the stage, where Burt waited for him at the end of the stairs. He held something in his hand, something metallic and yellow.

"Here," Burt handed it out to him. "Thanks kid," he added on.

Blaine smiled, and wrapped Burt's fingers into a fist before pushing it back to the man. "Keep it, Mr Hummel," he smiled.

"No, kid. I can't keep this. Kurt gave it to you," he protested.

"Consider it another wedding gift, Mr Hummel. It's okay, really. Besides, I have this to remind me of Kurt," Blaine said, emphasizing the wedding ring around his finger, the ring that held the bond of marriage between him and Kurt. "I want you to keep it, please."

"Gee kid..this- thank you," he said, with a tear lingering at the corner of his eye. He wrapped Blaine into a bone crushing hug abruptly. Blaine was gasping for air, but he smiled because he was glad Burt was happy, what the man, more than anyone in the world, deserved most.

----

The cemetery had more tombstones branching out from the ground now. It saddened Blaine, as it meant more lives were taken away in the span of five years. He skirted around tombstones, after tombstones trying his best to keep his balance with the obstacles in his way threatening to trip him.

He glanced up, and smiled when his eyes rested upon the unique white marble tombstone with golden engravings. He made his way towards it, and sat down right in front of the cursive name of his husband. His fingers automatically began tracing the wordings.

"Hey beautiful," Blaine murmured into the howling wind that blew his dark curls into a mess.

"Your dad got married yesterday," Blaine started, his fingers still trailing the outline of Kurt's full name. "Oh it was such a beautiful ceremony. And he looked really happy. I think you would have done a way better job of the reception that my mum did, though. Your dad was smiling throughout. He wished you were there, though in my heart I knew you were. I gave him the brooch that you gave me, and he cried. That's where I think it belongs, Kurt.

I graduated from Julliard, like you predicted. Degree in performing arts, and at the ceremony where I received it, all I could think about was you. How I knew you would be so proud of me, how I wish you were sitting in the crowd looking as beautiful as you always are, but when I looked at my ring, I just- I knew you were smiling down at me.

I moved into an apartment with Rachel. Yes, that annoying girl you once told me talked too much in literature class. She's almost my best friend, Kurt. But nobody can fill that role. Like the role that holds my heart, you play it. You're both my lover, and my best friend.

But the apartment..you would love it. It has a balcony that overlooks central park. Every night, I would stand out there, looking up to the stars you can barely see in New York, and smile..because I know one of those stars is you.

It's been five years, Kurt..and I'm still missing you..terribly.

Every night, when I lay in bed...I wish I was holding you. There's not one second of the day that goes by, where I'm not thinking of you. I'm sorry it's been awhile since I came back. I feel guilty every day. Every night I pray and wish that maybe..maybe God would be so kind to return you back to me..but I know that's a long shot. I still miss you, Kurt," Blaine wiped his tears away with his thumb, sobbing in the silent cemetery.

"I see my dad has kept his promise. I told him to come here at least once a week to place flowers here. I told him all the kinds of flowers, and apparently he did not disappoint," Blaine said, picking up the flowers that were still mildly fresh. He tossed the week old ones away, before placing the new ones he had bought onto the foot of the tombstone.

"I can't promise you that I'll come back often. It kills me, and I'm sorry. I'll try to come back to Lima, whenever I can. Know that even though I'm not here, Kurt, I'm always still loving you, still missing you, and still thinking about you..form wherever that I am."

Blaine leaned forward, and pressed a gentle kiss on Kurt's golden engraved name on the marble tombstone, tearing as he did. 

"I love you, so much...and like I said years ago..I'll always remember you."

-----

Blaine sighed lethargically once he unlocked the door to his apartment. Rachel was behind him, equally tired. They both entered the well furnished apartment. A couch placed in the middle, facing the flatscreen television that both Blaine and Rachel had to spend months saving up to afford. HD was worth it though. The white fluffy carpet, like the one that was once in Kurt's bedroom, covered the floor. Twinkling lights hung on the walls lazily. 

Rachel tossed her luggage to the side and walked into the kitchen, immediately busying herself with making a cup of tea. Blaine slumped onto the couch and tried to take calming breaths. He hated travelling through flight, it felt so exhausting. 

"If that's chamomile tea, I want some!" he bellowed to Rachel.

The girl came out a few minutes later, to find an almost asleep Blaine sprawled on the couch. "Here," she said, handing him the mug.

"Hmm, that was a good trip home. I'm so happy for Carole and Burt. They looked so happy together," she hummed.

"Yup," Blaine mumbled lazily. "So are you and Finn back together?"

She was taken aback, her eyes widening in startle. "What makes you say that," she said coyly.

"Probably from the way you guys were eating each other's face off at the wedding reception," Blaine smiled teasingly.

"Oh shut up. It was just- it was nice to see him again.."

"Mm hmm," Blaine hummed.

She rolled her eyes, and shifted herself on the couch to get into a more comfortable position. "Finn and I will always have history. He's my first love, he'll always have a special place in my heart." Rachel confessed.

"I know what you mean," Blaine smiled. It was true, because it was the same for Kurt.

Blaine unzziped his bag pack, and smiled at the first object that was sitting on the surface. He pulled out the storybook out carefully, and smiled just looking at it. "What's that?" Rachel asked, eyeing him from the couch she was laying on.

"It's a storybook. Kurt's storybook," Blaine told.

"You took his storybook? Out of all the things in his bedroom, you took his storybook?"

"I kinda had my first real conversation with him when he had this book in his hands. Holds a lot of memories, you see," Blaine said.

"Can I see it?" Rachel asked, as she rose up to a sitting position. 

Blaine was hesitant, not because he didn't want to share it, but because she had a mug of tea in her hands. Blaine was afraid she might spill it onto the book.

"Can you promise to be careful?"

"When have I not been careful?"

"Hm, let me see- how about the time you dropped basically all the plates from the rack? Or the time you broke my lava lamp? Let us not forget the time you almost burned the apartment down by cooking a simple dish such as chicken soup?"

"Alright, I get you," she laughed, placing her mug of tea onto the coffee table in the middle of the room. "Here, give it to me." With dread, Blaine handed the fragile book to the girl, who took it gently, though to Blaine looked a little too rough.

"Careful, I said!"

"Oh relax."

Rachel examined the front cover of the book first, before she opened it to flipped through a couple of pages, but when she did that, a piece of folded paper slolwy floated in the air from the center of the book, only to rest on her thighs. Both Rachel and Blaine stared at it, because it had a name written on the upper side. In cursive, elegant hand writting, across the paper wrote the name- Blaine.

"Wh-what is that?" Blaine asked. His eyes widened in an emotion he did not recognize.

"I- I don't know. It's a note, apparently.." her fingers here about to pick the note up, but Blaine yelled at her in fear.

"Rachel, don't!"

She screamed in surprise, and jumped up to stand on the couch. Blaine did the same, and they both stood on the couch, watching the note as if it would come to life.

"Where did you find that?"

"It was in the book. Take it!" Rachel said.

"Wh- no way!"

"It's obviously for you, Blaine!" 

"I know, but it's written in Kurt's hand writing." Blaine said.

"So?"

"So? So that means it's for me. He wrote it for me, but I've never seen it before. Wh- what if it's bad?"

"What do you mean by that?" Rachel asked, frowning at him.

"Wh- what if it's what Kurt wrote when we broke up that one time. What if it's a note that says he never loved me or something. What if that note will change everything!"

"Blaine.." 

This was why Blaine was afraid to enter Kurt's bedroom in the first place. He was afraid he would come across something that would change his entire perception of Kurt, or something that would prove that their love was never real. He hated feeling nervous, and this definitely made him nervous.

"Blaine why don't you read it first? I doubt it's anything of that sort-"

"What if it is?"

"It won't matter, Blaine. You know Kurt loved you, to the very last second of his life. You know that. Whatever is written in that note won't erase your memory."

"Rachel..I don't- I don't think I can." 

Tears began filling his eyes as he crumbled down onto the couch and curled into himself. He hugged his knees into his chest and sobbed quietly. In a second, twig-like arms were wrapped around his shoulders in comfort.

"Shh- it's okay. You don't have to read it now if you're not ready," Rachel comforted. 

The girl kissed him lightly into his curls and stroked her hands gently across Blaine's arms. This was what he loved most about Rachel. Just her simple comfort was able to make him feel as though he wasn't alone in New York.

"I have to read it, otherwise I won't be able to sleep, or eat or anything," Blaine whimpered.

"If you think you're ready. Do you want me to stay with you while you read it, or do you want to be alone?" she asked.

"I think I need to be alone," he looked up at her with his doleful brown eyes, and she smiled encouragingly.

"I'll just be inside my room if you need me, okay? And remember, Kurt loved you. No matter what is in that note, he always loved you." Rachel pressed a chaste kiss on his temple, in the way best friends did, before she smiled at him one last time and left for her room.

With shaky hands and legs, Blaine stood up from the couch and gently picked the folded piece of paper up. He held it by it's tip, with some fear that it might come alive and eat him still intact. He walked out into the balcony, shut the sliding glass doors and sat on one of the vintage wooden chairs Rachel had bought at a flea market.

Blaine stared out into the open, admiring the canopy of darkness of central park at night. He tried to rid his brain of any negative thoughts, be he couldn't help it. That note in the tip of his fingers, was the last piece of fragment Kurt left behind. Whatever it was, it was something Blaine had never seen before, and it was written by Kurt. It's from the boy that he loved. The magnitude of it made him shiver in his seat.

"Okay, Kurt.. here goes nothing," Blaine whispered into the bustling noise of New York ten storeys below him. He unfolded the paper, and was greeted by words all written in perfect elegance of calligraphy hand writing.

Dearest Blaine,

February 2nd, 2013.

          This little note, is meant for when I've already passed, but if you've found it before that, it doesn't really matter. Blaine, I've never explained to you why this book meant a lot to me. See, the reason why I grew attached to this book, was because I related so much to the female character. She too, was diagnosed with a terminal illness, and like her, I also wished to witness a miracle before my passing. I must have read it for like a thousand times, and each time I did, I had wished to meet someone like the male character, Landon Carter. He was a boy, who fell in love with her, and despite the girl's illness, he stayed because he loved her. Not only did he stay, he made all her wishes come true. All the things she had on her list of the things she wanted to do before she passed, he made come true. He even married her. When I read this book, I wanted to meet someone like him. Someone who would make my wishes come true before my passing. Someone who would look pass my illness and love me despite. Someone who would eventually marry me. And I did meet someone like him- you, Blaine. I never had a list, just fantasies, and without you even being aware of it, you made them all come true. For awhile, I thought the miracle I was looking for, was a miraculous cure to my cancer, but it wasn't. It turns out, the miracle I was looking for, was you. You came into my life so unexpectedly, and you brought me the one thing I never told anyone I yearned for- to be desired, to have someone call me beautiful, to have someone look at me like I was his world, to have some who defended me, to have someone love me in such a way nobody has. I never told you this either, but the first time we slept together, I woke up and simply gazed at you, because it was the benchmark moment when I knew you were the person I wish to have spent the rest of my life with. The first time I saw you, God I thought you were the most beautiful thing I've ever seen. You had me at first glance, Blaine, and throughout of the course of our relationship, you made me constantly fall in love with you- over and over again. You mean the world- no, the world is not of big enough size to describe how much you mean to me. You mean the universe to me, Blaine. The universe with all of it's seven layers of skies. So whether I'm miraculously still beside you, sharing a tub of vanilla ice cream, or whether I'm no longer there, know that you were my dream, brought to reality. I love you, and I will always be in love with you.

Forever yours,
Kurt- your sunshine.

Tears slowly began falling down the corners of his eyes, soaking the bottom portion of the letter that was blank. He smiled, as the love for his husband grew larger- something he thought could never be possible, as it was already in such a significant magnitude.

He stared out into the urban jungle, where his new life was settled in, but looking up, he knew the past- the past that he would cherish forever- was still a part of him no matter where he was in the world. Kurt, would forever be in the sky, watching him from the heavens.

"I love you more, sunshine.." Blaine sighed into the air.