You Trip Me Up
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To Be Yours

You Trip Me Up: Chapter 14


E - Words: 3,592 - Last Updated: Jul 03, 2013
Story: Complete - Chapters: 17/17 - Created: Apr 05, 2013 - Updated: Jul 03, 2013
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Tilly loves her job. She might not like or agree with her employers most often...hell, sometimes she wants to smack them upside their heads at how arrogant and stupid they can be. But she loves waking up each morning and getting ready for work.

After her Charles died seven years back, going to work and seeing those two boys everyday was what got her through the rough patches.

Especially Kurt.

He would sit with her and hold her hand and comfort her as unexpected waves of sadness would strike and hit her with loneliness and a longing to have her husband back.

She loves Kurt just like he was one of her own kids. It's why she always tries to be there when he needs her, it just needs help in general. She will protect and love him as long as she lives.

Waking up this morning, she takes a shower and gets dressed. Pulling her hair back in a bun, she heads downstairs to make breakfast for Kurt and her.

Seeing Kurt sitting at the kitchen table earlier than she expected, she goes about making them breakfast.

"You okay, honey?" she asks as she starts to crack some eggs into a frying pan.

"Wh-...Yeah, just couldn't sleep."

"You miss him." She knows how bad it's been for Kurt these past couple of days.

The longing has been apparent in his eyes. She's noticed how he holds tightly to his phone as if waiting for it to ring; and when it does, she sees the brief excitement that fills his eyes quickly leave them when he sees who is calling. It's easy for her to know who he wishes would call, and she held out hope Blaine would. But it's been four days and not a word.

"Yeah." She hears Kurt sigh and start to flick his lighter on and off. "What am I supposed to do, Till?" Kurt looks at her with pleading eyes as he asks her that.

"I told you what you should have done," she tells him as she scrambles the eggs. "You need to tell him how you feel." She sees Kurt shake his head no at her suggestion. "Well, I got nothing else for ya. You want to be stupid, go right on ahead; but don't say I didn't tell ya."

Hearing Kurt's phone go off, she sees the same reaction as before when he silence it, knowing it wasn't who he was hoping it to be.

"Why don't you just call him, yourself?" she asks as spoons some eggs onto Kurt's plate.

"Because I am stupid," Kurt admits, setting his phone facedown on the table. "I can't handle being rejected by him, again."

"I'm pretty positive he wouldn't reject you if you told him the truth." Tilly sits down across from him, watching him eat a forkful of eggs. "Tell him you love him."

"That's easier said than done," Kurt comments as he sets his fork down on his plate.

"A lot of things are easier said than done, but people still find the strength to say them," Tilly tells him. "If they didn't the world would be different place." Standing up, she kisses Kurt's forehead. "I'm going to work. Don't think too much about all the fine print, just enjoy the product."

"What does that mean?" Kurt confusedly asks.

"Exactly what you think," Tilly tells him.

"I should tell him, shouldn't I?" Kurt mumbles.

"Yes," Tilly replies. "Now, I'm going. Bye."

"Bye, Till," Kurt says to her.

Walking away from him, Tilly wonders when these two damn boys will realize that they already have each other if they just learn to say what they feel.

~

It's as she sets Blaine's plate of food down in front of him does she hear what John is having Blaine do. Clamping her mouth from saying anything, she looks to Blaine and shakes her head. Walking back into the kitchen, she can already imagine the heartbreak Kurt will be going through at the news.

Cleaning dishes, she hears the soft click of the door behind her, knowing who it is without looking.

"Please, don't hate me, Till," Blaine says with a slightly wavering voice.

"I don't hate you, Blaine." Tilly dries her hands on her apron and turns around to face Blaine. "I'm just tired of seeing you hurt Kurt."

"I wish I didn't," Blaine mumbles.

"Why don't you stand up to your dad? Why don't you fight for who you truly want?"

"I'm terrified," Blaine admits. "I can't have my parents hating me."

"So, you're going to give up Kurt to make your father happy?" Tilly asks confusedly, shaking her head and not believing this is what Blaine is choosing.

"I'm a fucking coward, aren't I?" Blaine rhetorically asks.

"No matter what you are," Tilly tells him in all honesty. "You can still stop all this and fight for who you want."

"God, I...I do want to fight for him," Blaine admits. "I love him, Till."

"Both you boys are too stupid for your own good," Tilly says as she shakes her head.

"What's that mean?"

"It means you two need to learn to really speak to each other."

"Where is he, Till?" Blaine silently asks. "I know you know. Please, tell me."

She looks to him and sees the desperation and hope in his eyes. Knowing she shouldn't tell him; she shouldn't let Kurt endure what Blaine has to tell him. But she also knows it won't be long before Kurt finds out the truth. "He'll...He won't hate you. But he won't like you, Blaine," she quietly says.

"I know that. But...but I need to see him to tell him myself." Blaine looks at her with pleading eyes. "Please, Tilly. Please...Tell me where I can find him."

~

Kurt sits on the couch in Tilly's living room watching the dumbest show ever while snacking on Reese's Puffs cereal. Turning it off when someone knocks, he figures he should answer since there's no one else to get it.

Standing up, he walks to the front door.

"Blaine!" he excitedly says when he opens the door, smile spreading wide across his face. Throwing himself into Blaine's embrace and holding him close.

"Hi, Kurt," Blaine manages to say right before Kurt is pulling him inside, kicking the door shut, and kissing him like crazy. "K-Kurt...I have to tell you something."

Kurt undoes Blaine's belt and pants until they hang loose around his hips. "Later," he says, slipping his hands in Blaine's pants and grabbing at his ass. "I missed you."

"I missed you, too."

"I want to feel you inside me right now."

"God, Kurt," Blaine groans, pushing his hips into Kurt's. "I need to tell-"

"Later!" Kurt firmly repeats again. "Please, Blaine, I need to feel you."

Kurt moans when Blaine hungrily kisses him, grabbing under his ass and lifting him up.

~

He knows he shouldn't do it. Stop from making it harder when he has to tell him why he's here.

But he needs this.

He needs to remember how it is to truly be himself; truly be happy.

He's not sure how long they spend in that tiny room. Hours pass, the sun slowly fades behind the curtains, noises of children playing disappear with the oncoming dark sky. But all those hours are not enough for him. He needs days, weeks, and months. He needs...years.

He needs to have a forever with Kurt, but he's scared of asking for that and being rejected; learning it was never more than this.

So, he'll take these precious hours. He'll take his name as it falls from Kurt's lips in ecstasy; he'll take kisses all over his body, and burying his fingers in soft, chestnut hair. He'll take what is given, what he can, because he knows it will be the last time.

Watching Kurt as he sleeps, small smile tugging at the corner of his lips, Blaine is tempted to shake him awake and ask him to run away from everything and be with him. The chance of spending forever with the person he loves is so tempting, and right there for him to take, all he needs to do is reach out and take it.

When he was six he accidentally got locked in a dark, empty room. The darkness that surrounded him, swallowed him in a way the terrified him to his core as he sat with his knees to his chest crying for his mom changed him afterwards. It made him terrified of being in the kind of dark that made it impossible to see what was right in front of him.

But he remembers Tilly opening the door and having the light spill in and bring him the comfort and safety he needed.

Right now, he feels like he's locked in that darkness that he can't get out of. It traps and holds him in a way the makes him feel prisoner. But being here right now in this moment with Kurt is that sliver of light that pushes out everything and makes him feel safe and happy. Kurt is his light that makes him feel alive and like himself in a time when he's surrounded by a darkness that has him scared and being someone he is not.

Leaning down, he softly brushes his lips to Kurt's kiss-swollen ones and gently begins to wake him up. The press back of lips has him smiling and running his hand down Kurt's side. Eyes flutter open and he's met with a blue that always reminds him of

"Hi," he gently says.

"Hi," Kurt replies, smile tugging at his lips. "How long was I asleep?"

"About two hours." Leaning forward, he captures Kurt's mouth in a sensual kiss, pushing his hips to Kurt's, moaning when their arousals brush together. "I want you inside me," he desperately says as he kisses at Kurt's neck and throws his leg over Kurt's hip.

"Okay."

Just like before, Blaine isn't sure how much time passes as Kurt and him move together in a perfect rhythm.

The sky gets darker, the moon bright and discernible through the curtains, and an owl hooting outside in a nearby tree is drowned out by their combined moans and whimpers.

He hitches his leg up higher on Kurt's side, bowing and arching his back as Kurt continues to thrust into him. Sparks of pleasure run through his veins and make him shudder; it's good, but not enough. He needs to feel more; feel as Kurt practically claims him for himself and himself alone. He needs Kurt to know that after tomorrow he can look back on this night and know he was his.

"Hard...Harder, Kurt," he pants, feeling Kurt slow his movements, the exact opposite of what he wants. "No," he says, pushing Kurt's hips forward, trying to get the friction back. "Don't stop."

Going when Kurt pushes him onto his back, he lifts his legs high on either side of Kurt, throwing his head back and moaning when Kurt starts to thrust into him with hard snaps of his hips. The headboard bangs loudly against the wall, obvious dents probably being left, and Blaine is enthused that they're alone and won't have to deal with knowing looks in the morning. Reaching up behind him, he plants his hands to the headboard, fingernails curling into the wood, and uses the leverage to work his hips down.

Kurt brackets his hands on either side of Blaine's head and starts to pound into him. Blaine tilts his hips higher trying to get more of Kurt into him. Dropping one arm to Kurt's back, he digs his nails in, half-crescent moon shapes being left in his skin, and scratches down Kurt's back.

All too soon, he feels his body seize up and then snap. Arching his back, he cries out as he comes; as he experiences waves of pleasure that make him feel incredible. It courses through him and tingles under his skin.

Holding Kurt as he kisses him, he feels him stutter his hips and come.

Breathing heavy, Kurt collapsing on top of him and catching his breath, Blaine knows he will not belong to no one else like he belongs to Kurt.

He doesn't say anything after Kurt pulls out of him. Instead, he just lies on his side and stares into Kurt's eyes that shine bright and are filled with happiness. If he had the strength and courage to, even if he thought it wouldn't be said in return, he would tell Kurt how much he loves him. But he keeps his feelings to himself; keeps his heart safe from the ache he could experience. Instead, he presses close to Kurt's body and buries his face in the crook of his neck. Breathing in the smell of Kurt that mixes with the smell of sweat and sex, Blaine knows that this is the moment he could change everything if he wanted to.

But he doesn't.

He closes his eyes and slowly falls asleep being held by Kurt as he listens to his even breathing and feels him softly running his fingers through his curls.

Hearing the ringing of his phone, Blaine jerks awake a few hours later. Sitting up, he carefully slips out of bed so as not to disturb Kurt. Looking for his hastily discarded pants, he finds them and searches for his phone in the pocket. Seeing his father's name on the lit up screen, he knows he has to answer.

Walking outside the room, gently closing the door, he finally hits the answer button. "Hello."

"Blaine," his father says with a bit of relief to his voice. "Where the hell are you? You've got me and your mother sick with worry."

"I have something I needed to take care of." Blaine wraps his arm around himself, already missing the warmth of sleeping next to Kurt.

"And that manages to take all day?"

"Yes."

There's a few moments of silence, Blaine only hearing his father breathing

"This is the last time you're seeing him, Blaine!" his dad orders, easily figuring out where he is. "After that, you're doing as I said at the upcoming party. Do you understand me?"

"Yes, Dad."

"Now, come home this instant!" his father demands.

"No! I'll be back in the morning." Blaine ends the call before his dad has a chance to reply, shutting off his phone, and goes back into the room, finding Kurt still peacefully sleeping. Climbing back in bed and pulling Kurt to him, his back flush to his chest, Blaine strokes his thumb over Kurt's tattoo. The green standing out against the creamy, paleness of Kurt's skin. Leaning forward and pressing a kiss over one of the leaves of the clover, hearing Kurt sigh in his sleep, Blaine hopes that the morning doesn't change Kurt's thoughts and feelings toward him.

Kissing the back of Kurt's neck, he keeps his lips pressed to warm skin salty with sweat, wishing he could stop the rising of the sun, and the start of a new day, and live forever in this night with Kurt.

~

He wakes up wondering why his pillow is so tough, only to hear the steady beat of a heart beneath his ear and recall the day before. Pretty much spending the day in bed with Blaine was something he didn't know he needed at the moment.

Propping himself up on one arm, he stares down at Blaine as he sleeps. He watches the steady rise and fall of his chest, stares at his kiss-swollen lips slightly parted as he breathes in and out. Watching him look so peaceful and happy, Kurt decides right then and there to follow Tilly's advice and tell Blaine how he feels. After he wakes up, he's going to gather the courage and tell him.

Smiling when he sees Blaine slowly blink his eyes open, he says, "Morning."

"What time is it?" Blaine asks with a scratchy voice.

"Close to nine," Kurt replies. Lying back down, and resting his head on Blaine's shoulder, Kurt definitely knows he could spend the rest of his life waking up like this. "How much longer can you stay?" He's not stupid; he knows Blaine is here without telling his parents where he was going. He knows he doesn't have much longer before he has to leave.

"Actually, I should be going." Blaine moves to sit up, but Kurt wraps an arm around his waist and pulls him back down. "Kurt, what are you doing?" he asks with a chuckle.

"You should stay," Kurt replies. "Stay and defy your dad this once."

Lying there, Kurt lets Blaine go and watches as he sits up and throws his legs over the edge of the bed. The tension in his shoulders and muscles is very noticeable as he sits there; it makes Kurt wonder what it is that has him worried.

"I have to tell you why I'm here, Kurt," Blaine says with a shaky and wavering voice.

"Tell me."

"I...I'm asking Kennedy to marry me."

It takes a few seconds for it to fully register what Blaine just told him. It sounds like a joke that was terrible and wrong, and the punchline doesn't make sense.

"W-what?" He sits up, hoping he heard wrong, but knowing he didn't.

"My dad's making me ask her at the party this coming up Saturday."

"Your...your dad?" Kurt looks at him with a hint of anger. "Blaine, when the fuck are you gonna do something for yourself? When are you gonna live your life? How long are you gonna let daddy live your life for you?"

"I do live my life!" Blaine yells as he starts to get dressed.

Kurt stands up off the bed and grabs his underwear, slipping them on.

"You live your life? That's the funniest joke I've heard in a long time," Kurt says with a fake laugh as he puts his hands on his hips and watches Blaine pull his shirt on.

"Fuck you, Kurt," Blaine angrily replies.

"Oh, we did, remember? All day yesterday. That's why you came over isn't it? To fuck me one last time before you run off and marry little miss sunshine!" Kurt fumes with anger, and knows this could quickly turn ugly if they don't get it under control. Knowing him and his mouth, he'll say something he will regret.

"I didn't come over here to fuck you," Blaine tells him, buckling his belt. "I came to tell you myself what was happening. You wanted me to fuck you, remember?" Blaine smugly says and grins at being right.

"Excuse me for wanting some," Kurt retorts. "If I had known all this would have happened I would have just called Zac."

Kurt notices Blaine snap his head up from where he is looking for his shoes. He sees the hurt his words caused in Blaine's eyes. "You don't mean that," Blaine says with hurt evident in his voice.

"Yeah, you're right," Kurt sighs. "I don't mean it. That guy is a complete asshole." Kurt chuckles and notices the corner of Blaine's mouth twitch up into a smile. "Why are you asking her?" he seriously asks, voice soft and filled with sadness.

"You know my dad, Kurt," Blaine huffs, sitting on the edge of the bed to put his shoes on.

"I also know you," Kurt tells him as he kneels behind him and drapes his arms over Blaine's shoulders. He nuzzles his nose in the crook of Blaine's neck, breathing in the smell of him. Splaying his hand over Blaine's heart, he feels the beat of it beneath his palm and wishes he could say it belonged to him. "You're stronger than him. You should stand up and fight for what you want."

"What would that be?" Blaine turns and looks at him as he asks, Kurt seeing what he thinks is a flicker of hope in his eyes.

"You..." he trails off. In that moment, he so desperately wants to tell Blaine that he should fight for him. And not even fight, just ask to be his and let him know that he's been his since he was seventeen. "You should fight for control of your life," Kurt replies instead, forcing a small smile.

Going with Blaine when he stands up, Kurt moans when he kisses him. He feels the touch of Blaine's hand at his lower back that presses him closer to Blaine's body until they are flush together.

Staring into Blaine's eyes when he drops his forehead to his, Kurt sees a glimmer of happiness in them.

"I can't, Kurt," Blaine brokenly says, holding him close. "I can't fight."

Kurt feels his heart break and his world crumble a bit. "Just...Go away, Blaine, before I say something I'll regret," he says with a weak and wavering voice as he pushes Blaine away. He turns away, staring out the window near him trying to hold back his tears.

"Kurt," Blaine says with desperation in his voice.

"Go away!" It breaks Kurt's heart to have to push away the person he loves, but Blaine already walked away; he doesn't want to waste any more energy on an argument and lose Blaine completely. "I can't look at you right now. I need some time alone to think."

"Don't hate me."

Kurt listens to Blaine's shoes hitting the wooden floor as he walks to the door. Knowing he can't let Blaine think that, he whispers, "I don't hate you, Blaine. I-I..." he trails off, biting his tongue from saying something he doesn't think he'll hear in return.

"You what?" comes Blaine's quiet voice filled with hope.

"It doesn't matter." Kurt wraps an arm across his chest, reaching to his back and runs his fingers over the edge of his tattoo. He might say it doesn't matter, but it matters more than anything. He's in love with Blaine, and hates that he never even had a chance to make him his.

Standing there and listening as Blaine leaves the room, the soft click of the door loud in the quiet room, Kurt finally lets the first tears fall. "I love you," he whispers under his breath to himself, dropping his hand from his tattoo.

What he had hoped would be positive morning, Kurt now wants to curl into a ball and cry.


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