April 27, 2015, 7 p.m.
Come What May: Week 14 - Losing Hope
T - Words: 2,964 - Last Updated: Apr 27, 2015 Story: Complete - Chapters: 40/? - Created: Nov 02, 2014 - Updated: Nov 02, 2014 220 0 0 0 0
BAM! There you have it! Now that Kurt knows, youre going to hate me for telling you that I definitely wont be able to update before next Tuesday, possibly Wednesday. My weekend is so busy, Im not going to have any time to write. But I will do my absolute best to update as soo as i can. In the mean time, Im going to leave you with this big cliffhanger. ;)
Please rate and review! Your feedback means so much to me!
Have a good weekend! Xoxo
"Apparently, you will make a good doctor someday," Kurt announced, when Blaine entered the coffee shop on Monday morning. He held up his bandaged had. "You were right. I didnt need stitches."
"Thats good," Blaine sat down across from him. "Im glad youre okay."
"I wanted to tell you when I was released, but you were gone. Dylan said you decided to go home, and I never heard from you again. I was surprised you showed today," he glanced down at his drink. "I was starting to think maybe you were avoiding me again."
"Hey, I told you I wouldnt do that anymore," Blaine replied. He gave Kurt a small smile and said, "I dont break promises."
"Never?" Kurt raised an eyebrow.
"I try not to," Blaine shrugged.
"I know, but I was bummed that you disappeared like that. It made me feel guilty. You put so much work into helping me Thursday, and I know Dylan was the reason you left," Kurt glanced up at him. He felt so terrible about what happened the week before. Dylan had been so on edge with Blaine all week. It wasnt fair. "Please dont let Dylan bring you down, Blaine. He can be a little... verbally expressive. Hes not afraid to give his opinion."
"Ive noticed," Blaine shrugged.
"Did you really go home after you left the hospital?" Kurt asked. "I know youve been fighting with Rachel."
"No. I sent Sam a text, asking if they really stayed in Lima over Thanksgiving, and he told me that if I really needed a place to stay, they had an extra key hidden in the plant by their front door to the apartment," Blaine sighed heavily.
"You stayed at Mercedes and Sams apartment all weekend?" Kurt was surprised.
Blaine flatly said„ "I couldnt go home. She didnt want me there. I need to give her the space she needs."
He tried reading Blaines expression. He seemed so calm about everything, like he had just accepted that things had fallen apart, and there was nothing he could do about it. it was so unusual for Blaine.
"Youre a very devoted person, arent you?" Kurt asked curiously. It was one of the things he admired most about Blaine. He was devoted to the things he cared about, like Rachel. Even though he wasnt sure he wanted to be with her, Blaine was still willing to look out for her.
"Do I have another choice?" Blaine asked. He buried his face in his hands.. "Im sure Dylans happy that Im out of the apartment anyway. I shouldnt have overstayed my welcome."
"You didnt. I liked having you there," Kurt reached across the table and pulled Blaines hand away from his face. "If anything, I was disappointed that you left. When we finally went home, I made a comment that it was too bad you had prepared dinner and didnt even get to enjoy it. Dylan was pissed. He said that you were the last thing I needed to worry about and insisted that your name doesnt get brought up the rest of the night."
"Im sorry," Blaine let his other hand fall to the table.
"Dont be," Kurt squeezed his hand. "He can be a little stubborn at times, but Im not letting that stop me from seeing you. You are a part of my life, and if he wants to be with me, hes going to have to accept you."
"Thank you, Kurt," Blaine gave half a smile.
"I think staying with Sam and Mercedes is a good idea. I think Dylan could use a break. However, if things get a little too cramped there, feel free to come back. It wont make him happy, but I dont mind," Kurt stood up. "I have to get over to Vogue, but Ill see you later, okay?"
Okay," Blaine nodded. Kurt turned to go, but paused when Blaines chair scraped the floor and he called, "hey, Kurt?"
"Yes?" he turned around to face Blaine.
"Thank you for everything. I dont know how I managed to find a friend like you."
"Where were you?" Dylan asked, when Kurt entered the apartment from work two days later.
"I had to stay late at work. Im sorry. I meant to text you, but my phone died," Kurt said, holding up his useless phone. "Did you make dinner?" he asked, glancing around the empty kitchen.
"I already ate," Dylan said shortly, rising from the couch, crossing his arms over his chest. A hard expression on his face. Kurt knew Dylan wasnt going to let this go without another fight.
"Without me?" Kurt asked hotly.
"Why should i have waited?" Dylan gestured to the table. "I figured you were out with him. I wasnt going to make dinner for someone whod rather spend their evening with someone else."
Dylan had referred to Blaine as "him" since the night he chased Blaine from the hospital. He was so jealous, he couldnt even use Blaines name anymore. Kurt didnt know if more had gone down between Dylan and Blaine while he was with the nurse or not, but he sincerely hoped that Dylan hadnt caused more damage than Blaine was admitting. After their meeting at the coffee shop two days ago, Kurt hadnt heard from Blaine. He was, more than likely, keeping his distance for Dylans sake.
"I worked late. I wasnt out with anyone. Im sorry. I told you my phone died," Kurt argued, tossing his phone on the kitchen counter. "Do you need to know where I am every minute now?"
"Well, how was I supposed to know you were working?" Dylan began to raise his voice. "How was I supposed to know that you werent at that damn coffee show with him again? You spent weeks with him before you even told me you were meeting every morning."
"Because it was innocent!" Kurt shouted. "I told you there was nothing to worry about. If there had been something to worry about, dont you think I wouldnt run and tel you like it was no big deal?"
"Does that mean theres a chance youre hiding something from me now?" Dylan said coldly. "How do I know this work story isnt a cover up? How do I know youre being honest with me?"
For a moment, Kurts heart stopped He was faced with the opportunity to tell Dylan the truth about Blaine. He could admit that he slept with Blaine. that hes kissed him more times than he can count now. That he had feelings for Blaine.
But the more Kurt stared into the eyes of the man that he was so afraid of losing, he realized that he couldnt do it. His mouth was dry. His hands were shaking, and his heart felt like it was going to beat out of his chest. This would ruin so much. It would throw everything away like it didnt matter. And for what? Blaine was still playing this game with Rachel. He still hadnt admitted anything to her. What would Kurt gain from this? The future without Dylan seemed like such a scary place.
Running his hands over his face, Kurt took a deep breath, "Dylan, youre getting out of line. I dont like that every time Im not here or at work, you get jealous because you assume Im with Blaine."
"Well, what am I supposed to think, Kurt? You spend a lot of time with him. When the three of us are together, youre always defending him," Dylans voice grew louder.
"Because you start bashing him the second he walks in the door!" Kurts voice began to tremble. Tears formed in his eyes. the thought of Dylan hurting Blaine anymore left him feeling so angry. He wasnt going to stand for this. "You dont exactly make him feel welcome, Dylan. I wont have you talk to my friends like that. Id defend anyone."
"Its different with him," Dylan said shortly.
"Because you dont treat my other friends that way," Kurt snapped. "Sam walks in here and you act like his best friend. Why? Because you know damn well that you dont have a reason to be jealous of him, so you welcome him with open arms. Its Blaine. Youre so jealous of Blaine that he drives you crazy."
"If you didnt give me a reason to be jealous - " Dylan started.
"What? Like Thursday? Because he was willing to help me with our dinner, while you sat in the living room watching football. He was helping me!" Kurt quickly brushed the tears off his cheeks.
"But when I came in here the last time - "
"I had just cut myself. Did you expect him to sit back and tell me to get over it? He was trying to help, and you pushed him away, making him feel guilty," Kurt stepped closer. He jabbed a finger in Dylans chest. "Dylan you really need to control yourself around him, because Im not going to stand for this anymore. Blaine is welcome here any time he wants to, and theres nothing you can say to change my mind."
"So youre choosing him," Dylan pouted.
"Im not choosing anything!" Kurt threw his hands up in exasperation. "Youre my boyfriend, arent you? Im not going to run out of here for him and act like the last two years didnt mean anything."
"Did they?" Dylan raised an eyebrow.
"Of course they did!" Kurt snarled. "You know they did. But if you honestly want to be with me, you need to understand that I can be friends with anyone I want to be friends with. Its my life. I make the choice, not you. And I choose to be friends with Blaine."
"Fine," Dylan mumbled. He turned on his heel and made his way into the bedroom. Kurt made his way to the front door. If he wasnt going to make things right with Dylan, there was someone he could clear things up with.
"Kurt? what are you doing here/?" Rachel opened the front door to him.
"Can we talk?" Kurt asked quietly.
"Sure, come in. Ive been meaning to spend time with you anyway. Its been a long couple of weeks, and I could really use a friend right now," she shut the door behind him and motioned toward the couch.
"i know the feeling," he mumbled, sitting down.
"Whats going on?" she asked, planting herself next to him. "Are you okay?"
"I dont know. I feel so confused. My head hurts," Kurt admitted. "I dont know what to do anymore."
"I know the feeling," she sat back and looked him over. "Is everything okay with you and Dylan?"
"Thats what I wanted to talk to you about," he told her.
"Im listening," she said..
"I know youre dealing with a lot," he started. "I know that Blaine came clean to you about cheating, and I know that youre probably hurting right now. I thought, maybe, you could help me figure out how Dylans feeling and what to do about it."
"Wait. Blaine told you all this?" she sat forward. "Does he just go blabbing my business to everyone?"
"Its okay. Im in a similar boat as you. Thats why Blaine and I have talked about this," he said. He had to be careful about how he worded things, because he didnt want to be the one to tout Blaine. that was his business.
"What do you mean?" she asked.
"My boyfriend doesnt like that Im friends with Blaine. He seems to think that every time Blaine and I are together, Im tempted to run away with him or something," Kurt said casually. "Its really bothering him, so Im sure he understands that you feel kind of like that... maybe not quite the same way but i can see how much its stressing him out."
"Except its totally different," she placed a hand on his knee. "Blaine actually admitted to cheating on me. If you didnt cheat on your boyfriend then theres nothing to worry about." She gave a soft laugh. "I dont see why hed be jealous of Blaine anyway. its not like you would cheat on your boyfriend with Blaine, because Blaine doesnt play for your team."
"Its silly, I know," Kurt gave her a little smile. "Ive tried telling him that its no big deal, but he cant let it go, and now were fighting all the time. I dont know what to do about it, because I hate fighting with him, but I dont want to stop being friends with Blaine."
"He should respect that. Blaines not a threat," Rachel replied. "I dont know how it feels to suspect cheating, because I never would have guessed with Blaine. But i know how it feels to be cheated on, and it really sucks, so I can imagine that Dylans on edge. Its why youre fighting, because he wants you to give in and ignore Blaine."
"I cant let go of Blaine. Hes been such a good friend to me since Ive gotten to New York... I dont know how to change his mind about Blaine. What do I do?" Kurt looked at her hopelessly.
"Well, what makes him think Blaine is such a threat?" Rachel asked. "If you figure that out, maybe you can find a way to show him that its not a big deal."
"I dont know. I guess because were together quite a bit. Blaine and I have become really good friends," Kurt hoped that answer would satisfy her, but the hungry look in her eyes made him think otherwise.
"I didnt know that," Rachel said in a higher voice. "To be honest, Blaine doesnt tell me much of anything anymore. Its a little overwhelming. I suppose that comes with cheating though... Dylan doesnt know our drama, does he?"
"No. Why?" Kurt asked.
She shrugged, "If he knew Blaine cheated, maybe he would worry that he cheated with you, and that probably would leave him feeling a little unsettled and threatened."
"But he doesnt know," Kurt said. "Hes been weird since I introduced him to Blaine."
"I dont know what to tell you, honey," she shook her head. "I cant even handle my own problems right now. All this crap with Blaine cheating has left me so conflicted."
"Im sorry about that," he mumbled, feeling his stomach clench. After all, it was his fault that things started falling apart between Blaine and Rachel. She just didnt know that.
"Im sorry. Im sure you dont want to hear it. Im sure Blaines told you everything," she waved it off.
"I dont know," he shrugged, afraid of where this was going.
Rachel looked at him longingly and asked, "Do you.. know who he cheated on me with? He wont tell me, and I dont know why its such a secret. Its not like Id find her and rip her throat out. I honestly just want to know."
Kurt bit his lip nervously. How was he supposed to answer that?
"You do know," she concluded eagerly. "I know you, Kurt Hummel. And thats a guilty face. Please tell me. im dying to know." She gripped his arm tightly, staring at him. "I swear I wont tell Blaine that you said anything."
"Its Blaines business to tell you that, not mine," he replied, still hoping to find a way out of this.
"Yes, but I know you know. Its not like hes ever going to tell me." Rachel scooted closer. "I wont tell him I know. Come on, I wont be mad. its not like it was you or anything."
Kurts body stiffened. His eyes shifted to the wall in front of him, "uh..."
"It... it wasnt you, was it?" Rachels face became more serious. She remained silent for so long, that Kurt wasnt sure what do to. She seemed to be connecting the dots from their conversation. Dylan being jealous of Blaine. Blaine telling Kurt everything about Rachel. Kurt and Blaine becoming so close...
"Oh," she whispered.
"Look..." he still couldnt speak.
"Oh my gosh. Did Blaine cheat on me with you?" her mouth fell open.
"Rachel- " Kurt started but she interrupted.
"But I dont understand. Blaines not gay. Why would he sleep with you? I know he said he felt like we were falling apart, but what does sleeping with you prove?" she stood up and began pacing. "And you have a boyfriend. Why would you do that to him?"
"its complicated," Kurt said helplessly. There was no way of backing out of this now. Staring at his shoes, he said, "Rachel, you have to understand that I didnt mean to get anyone hurt. It just sort of... happened."
"Yeah, thats what he said too," she mumbled.
"Blaines felt a little confused, and I was just trying to help him. I didnt mean to hurt you, and I know he didnt want to hurt you either," he stood up as well. "In fact, hes been trying to hold on to you for as long as possible, and I dont understand that, considering he knows now that youre not what he wants."
"What do you mean?" she stopped in front of him. Her eyes wide with fear.
"Blaine..." he hesitated, knowing hed regret saying this "Blaine... is gay. I didnt want to be the one to tell you, but it looks like i dont have another choice. I tried telling him to break up with you before you guys get any more involved but he wont."
Tears began rolling down Rachels cheeks, "It looks like youre too late there."
"Why?" Kurt asked his heart hammering quickly in his chest. How could there be more bad news? What else could possibly be standing in his way when it came to Blaine?
"Because we already are too involved," she said quietly.
"What do you mean?" Kurt asked suspiciously.
Biting her lip, she glanced down at her hands. They moved toward the bottom of her sweater and she pulled it over her head, revealing the tighter shirt she had underneath. Kurts eyes found the small bump of her belly and stared at her with an open mouth. "Youre not telling me that this is -" he paused, still staring.
"Were definitely in over our heads now," Rachel said.
"But - "
"Blaine and I are having a baby, Kurt," she finished.