Dec. 17, 2017, 6 p.m.
Come Hell Or High Water: Week 22 - Blaines Promise
T - Words: 2,607 - Last Updated: Dec 17, 2017 Story: Closed - Chapters: 28/? - Created: Apr 29, 2015 - Updated: Apr 29, 2015 236 0 0 0 0
Hi Guys! Im so sorry for my lack of updates. My life has just been so hectic. I wanted to do more with this chapter but k really just wanted to get something up. Its a small step though. Blaine realizes hes been too focused on his own problems to think about how Belle is feeling, and he knows he needs to change that. Im really going to try my best to work on this story and get it finished for you. Its been a long process and Im so sorry.
As Blaine entered the small room, his heart sunk to his stomach. Jill sat across the table from him with a look of terror frozen on her face.
"Hi," Blaine said.
"Hi," Jill whispered.
"I didnt want to come, you know," Blaine took a seat across from her.
"I dont blame you," she bowed her head. Taking a deep breath, she looked up and met his eyes, "How is your shoulder feeling?"
"Its alright," he said hotly. "More importantly, my daughters spirit has been crushed because of my injury."
"Blaine, Im so sorry," Jills voice cracked. "I didnt mean for it to happen."
"Why did you do it?" Blaine asked. "I put all of my trust in you."
"I was distraught," Jill said, tears welling in her eyes. "My dad got arrested for kidnapping your daughter. He blamed you. He blamed you for whatever made him so angry to take her. I felt like, if you hadnt caused conflict with him, he never would have done this. My dad was all I had and now I dont."
"Why would I have upset him enough to make him kidnap my daughter?" Blaine asked. It was a poor excuse and she knew it.
"I dont know," Jill said.
"Have you spoken to him?" Blaine asked, feeling nauseous.
Shaking her head, Jill said, "No, I probably wont see him until we go to court."
"I see," Blaine replied.
They say in silence for a moment, before Jill said, "Okay, this is really awkward. Why are you really here, Blaine?"
Shrugging, he said, "Detective Slate recommended it. She said you were kind of distraught and it might help if I talk to you."
"Do you feel better?" Jill raised an eyebrow.
"No, I feel terrible," Blaine sighed.
"Yeah, me too," Jill replied. She bit her lip and glanced down at her lap. "Look, for what its worth: I really am sorry, Blaine. I never meant for any of this to happen."
"Im not ready to forgive you yet, Jill," Blaine said. "This has given my baby girl problems for the rest of her life. Shes never going to fully heal from this."
"I know," Jill said quietly.
"Shes only eight," Blaines voice cracked. "Your father scarred her for the rest of her life, and I cant forgive him for that."
"I had nothing to do with the kidnapping," Jill shook her head. "I was trying to help you."
"But you turned your back on me in a delicate situation. You gave my daughter an image that will be engraved in her mind all of her life," Blaine stood up and took a step backward. "My daughter comes first to me, Jill. Shes hurting and I cant forgive myself for leaving her vulnerable enough for Tim to do what he did. Im not going to forgive you either." Tears stung his eyes and he turned to leave before he broke down in front of her.
Just as Blaine reached for the handle, Jill said, "Blaine, I understand. I dont blame you, because I cant forgive myself either."
To this, Blaine had no response. He wiped a tear off his cheek and pushed the door open, leaving Jill to her thoughts. He made his way out to the streets. He kicked the nearest wall out of frustration. Sinking to the ground, Blaine felt his heart beating quickly in his chest. He stared up at the passing clouds and sighed in defeat. This torment was never going to end.
Blaines fingers moved across the piano keys with ease. He found himself getting lost in the flow of the music. Nothing else in that moment mattered. The pain in his shoulder was forgotten, the pain in his heart was forgotten, and the world around him disappeared.
When he finished, a slow, steady applause from a single pair of hands filled the room. "I havent heard you play in a long time." Kurt sat down on the bench next to him and smiled, "Its nice but hows your arm?"
"I mostly used my right. My last appointment ended early, so I was playing around," Blaine blushed. He closed the lid of the piano and asked, "What are you doing here? Shouldnt you be at work?"
"Rachel called me earlier. She took Belle to therapy today and she had another mental breakdown. Rachel didnt know what to do. She just wanted me or you, so I came to give her a helping hand," he replied.
"Where is she now?" Blaine asked.
"Sam took her out for ice cream after he got home from school. I told him I really needed to get back to work," Kurt explained.
"So why arent you at work?" Blaine asked again.
"I had already left for the day," Kurt shrugged. "I just needed time away. I love Belle to death and I want to be there as much as possible for her. But this stress of working and dealing with nightmares and everything is getting to me. I just needed an hour or two away."
"So you came here," Blaine stated.
Placing his hand on Blaines thigh, Kurt said, "I just really miss you."
"I miss you too," Blaine said quietly, knowing it was partly his fault that he had been distant with Kurt.
"And Im worried about you. I really think we need to talk," Kurt said, leaning in to kiss his cheek.
"Theres nothing to talk about," Blaine pulled away and climbed off the bench. He picked up a stack of sheet music on the top of the piano and placed it in a folder.
"I dont believe that," Kurt followed him across the room. "Youve been distant. Youve been quiet. And I think I know you well enough to know when youve been hurting."
"Do you blame me? Youve been dealing with a lot too, Kurt," Blaine snapped.
"No," Kurt hesitated. "No, this is different. Im okay. I mean, as okay as I can be given circumstances. Sure, its been stressful but Im dealing with it."
"So am I," Blaine said.
"Then why wont you talk to me?" Kurt grabbed his arm. "Talk to me, Blaine. Let me help you."
"You cant help me. You dont understand," Blaine felt his heart beating quickly in his chest.
"What wouldnt I understand? Ive been going through this too? I may be handling it but I am hurting too. I know this is hard. I just wish we were dealing with this together. Please, Blaine, talk to me," Kurt begged. His piercing blue eyes digging deep into Blaines emotions."
"Its not the same!" Blaines voice cracked. Tears formed in his eyes, as he said,. "You werent the one that lost their dad. You werent the one responsible for Belles disappearance. You werent the one betrayed by family. You werent the one that found Belle. You werent the one she watches get shot and go through emergency surgery. You arent the one having trouble talking to her. You dont understand. Youll never understand."
Taking a deep breath, Kurt was silent for a long moment before he said, "Youre right, Blaine. I dont understand. You have been through a lot and Im sorry youre hurting so much. I hate seeing you in pain."
"Im just tired of hurting," Blaine said quietly, his voice cracking.
Wrapping his arms around Blaine, Kurt pulled him into a tight hug and said,"I know, sweetie. I know. I wish there was something I could do to take your pain away."
I"You cant," Blaine whispered.
"Than can you let me just be your comfort?" Kurt cupped his hand over his cheek. "Let me be here for you. Let me hold you and be your shoulder to cry on. I want to be here for you. Were in this together."
Blaine stared into Kurts piercing blue eyes and felt his heart sink. He had let down the person he loved more than anything in this world. He had pushed Kurt away and hurt him in the process. "Im so sorry, Kurt," he whispered.
"No, dont be sorry," Kurt rubbed his thumb across Blaines cheek. "Youve been overwhelmed. I understand. I just want to be here for you."
Blaine slowly nodded. "Youre right. I should rely on you. I-I want to. I love you and Im sorry Ive been pushing you away."
"Then can you promise me that youll let me in? Can you promise me that well stick together through this?" Kurt asked.
Blaine stared into the eyes that made his heart melt every time he saw them. He loved Kurt and he needed to work harder to hold on to the love they had. "I promise that Ill try," he said quietly.
"I love you" Kurt kissed him gently
I love you too," Blaine deepened the kiss. "I promise Ill always love you."
"What are those for?" Belle asked, as Blaine pulled color samples off the shelf.
"Theyre for painting," Blaine explained. "The babys going to need his own room and we want to make it fun for him."
"Babies dont have favorite colors," Belle rolled her eyes. A hint of annoyance in her voice.
"No but itll look nice," Blaine pulled a couple more samples down. "What color do you like better: blue or green?"
"Hmm," Belle placed a hand under her chin and considered her choices. "Maybe you could do both, because you have green eyes and dad has blue eyes."
Raising an eyebrow, Blaine stared at his options. "You know, that would be a good idea. We could have the room painted two different colors."
"What room is the baby going to sleep in?" Belle asked.
Hesitating, Blaine knelt down in front of her and said, "We were thinking about having him stay in your room and moving you into the office."
"Oh," Belle said shortly, her eyes focused on the ground.
"Its closer to our room and its smaller than the office," Blaine placed a hand on her shoulders. "Dont worry. The office is slightly bigger than your room. It was supposed to be another bedroom but we wanted you closer to us when you were an infant."
"Okay," Belle said quietly.
"You get a bigger room. Isnt that a good thing?" Blaine asked, noticing the sad look on her face.
"Sure," she shrugged. "C-can I pick out a color for my new room?" Belle asked. "I think I want yellow instead of pink."
"Sure," Blaine said. "Ill be right over by the counter. We can get them started on making the paint. Bring over your color when you find it."
"Okay," Belle said, reaching for the samples.
Blaine moved toward the counter. The samples were close enough that he could still see Belle from where he was." "Can I get this shade of green and this shade of blue made?" Blaine asked the man behind the counter. He waited, watching Belle make a decision.
After a moment, a man walked up from behind her and stood next to her. Blaines body stiffened. He watched as his heart beat quickly in his chest. Ever since she came home, he hated leaving her and he hated when other people came near her.
The man bent down and said something to her. Belle nodded. She then grabbed one more sample from the shelf and walked over to Blaine. "Do you like this shade of yellow or this one?" she held up two separate sheets.
"What did he say to you?" Blaine asked, staring at the man. He grabbed her arm.
"He said he liked the color I picked and asked if yellow was my favorite color," Belle told him.
"And that was all?" Blaine watched the guy pull samples from the shelf.
Taking his hand, Belle said, "Yes, daddy, its fine. Why are you acting like that?"
Shaking his head, Blaine said, "Yeah, youre right. Im sorry." He fidgeted with the small contents on the counter. He was driving himself crazy. He was too paranoid and he knew it.
Belle and Blaine walked out of the store fifteen minutes later with two gallons of paint. He bought the yellow for Belles room and the green for the babys room. He didnt have enough hands, so he decided to come back for the blue paint another day.
"Do you want to catch a cab back or take the subway?" Blaine asked.
"I like the subway," Belle replied.
"Subway it is," Blaine led her in the direction of the nearest subway entrance. They made their way downstairs and waited for the next train.
The ride home was a bit long. Blaine found himself dozing. When he realized they were at their stop, he grabbed his paint cans and said, "Come on, Belle." He moved off the train and turned around in time to see the door close. He glanced around him and realized he had left the train alone.
"No," he whispered. The paint cans dropped from his hand and rolled toward the train. The train disappeared and the cans fell on the tracks. Blaine stared with wide eyes at the disappearing train. "Belle!" he called, running toward the exit. He bolted up the stairs and on to the street, knocking people out of the way as he went.
This wasnt happening again. It wasnt. He couldnt lose her a second time.
Scanning the street, he saw an empty cab approach. Blaine ran out in the road, flagging it down. The driver hollered at him for being an idiot but Blaine didnt care. He instructed the driver to a subway stop far enough that would give him time to beat the train. Traffic was flowing with ease but Blaine felt nauseous and fearful that he wouldnt beat the train.
When reaching his stop, Blaine through cash in the drivers hand and said "keep the change." He flew out the door and ran down the subway stairs. He scanned the station and paced for a moment. He had to beat the train. If he didnt, Belle would be lost for sure.
After a couple minutes, a train pulled into the station. Blaine found the car they had entered and pushed through the passengers leaving to find Belle.
She sat in the same seat he left her. Eyes filled with tears, she stared out the window at the platform. Blaines heart skipped a beat and he ran to her, "Belle," he hugged her tightly. "Honey, Im so, so sorry."
Her sobs could be heard but she didnt respond. She clung to him with all of her strength. Her small body shook in his arms.
The train pulled out of the station and Blaine pulled away from Belle. He stared into her eyes and wiped a tear off her cheek. "I thought you were behind me. I didnt know," he said, tears falling from his own eyes.
"I was asleep," she whispered, climbing on his lap. She wrapped her arms around his neck. "I woke up and you were gone. I didnt know what to do."
"Are you mad at me?" Blaine asked.
She shrugged, "I dont think so. I was just scared. I didnt want to be kidnapped again."
"Annabelle, honey, I am so sorry," Blaine whispered, pulling her tight to his body. "I promise Im not never going to let anything happen to you again."
As the train continued, Blaine started thinking about how much potential trouble could happen in a split second. New York was a big place and Belle was vulnerable to danger no matter where she went, just like the baby would be.
He had already made the mistake of losing Belle in the short time she had been home, after her kidnapping had been his fault as well. Blaine had been so hurt by the kidnapping but he didnt consider how frightened of danger Belle had to be all the time too. It was probably worse for her. Kurt was right: They did need to deal with this together, as a family. So far, Blaine hadnt been there for Belle the way he should have been.
Blaine needed to do whatever it took to protect Belle from harm. On that train, he made a promise to himself that he would do whatever it took to protect his daughter.